WORST THING YOU HELPED SOMEBODY HIDE? | EP 399 56:59

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- Guys, we're back. - We're back indeed. - Before we go into the question of the week, I have a thing that I've been seeing, bro. And I'm not gonna lie, it's got me locked in. Have you man seen Ayame's little love triangle thing on TikTok? This girl's taking over.

- Really? - It's juicy. - Okay. - Right, so I knew you guys wouldn't know about it. So I'm gonna lock you in. So it's so fucking juicy. Listen. - All right. - Listen, listen, listen. Linda, Linda, Linda, listen, listen. So basically Ayame, yeah? - Yeah. - A little while ago. I need, caveat before we start.

If she's listening, obviously she is. I want my royalties. I want my royalties. - Okay. - So there's this guy on TikTok called Yuval, right? - Okay. - And he can find anyone, you man. - Okay. - So basically what- - I've seen that. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - She was in a hotel when you found her. - And you found her, yeah, yeah, yeah. - I saw her react to that. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. There.

He does a thing where people will, some people call him out and be like, they'll do a quick 360 of where they are anywhere in the world. And then they'll be like, you've all find me. And then he'll be like, easy peasy. And then he'll go, first of all, I did this and I geolocated this and the sun's from here. And he goes, you were in this room at this time. And then he'll go there. And then some people will be like, ah, bro, it's so jarring being six two. And he was like,

"Huh, that's what you think." And then it'll blow, "You're at this wall, which is this." And I went to there and measured each brick. And based on where you're stood next to, it means you're actually five foot six. And he'll like count pixels and things. Yuval's fucking sick, bro. But anyway, so he did one ages ago of Ayame at, it was either the first one he ever did was either a restaurant or hotel, I can't remember. - Okay, the one I've seen is hotel. - The one I've seen is hotel, but I don't know if that's the first one. - Okay.

I was the one that sent it to her. - Okay. - And I was like, "Bro, have you seen this?" - Okay. - And then went. So then she would tease him like, "Where am I now? Where am I now?" And he would keep finding her, keep finding her. And then her and Yuval would just have this back and forth for time. - On TikTok? - Yeah, it was sexy. - Okay. - Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. So they've had, her and Yuval have had this saga for time. - Find me. - Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, where,

The other day there was one where like she was at a wedding or whatever and she caught the bouquet and then she was like fine mate. And then yeah, it's turned into this whole like love affair. It's so juicy bro. Everyone's locked in. Intro Oliver.

- Okay. - So Oliver's just like another TikTok bra, he's got like a million TikTok or whatever. And they were at an event a few weeks ago together. - Her and him and Ayame. - Oliver and Ayame. - Okay. - And everyone's in the comments like, "Well gone, well gone, well gone, Oliver, Oliver." So now it's a love triangle. - Okay. - So now Yuval and Oliver are doing clap backs at each other. It's giving Bridget Jones's diary.

- Yeah, it's giving Bridget Jones's diary. - Okay. - And now they're doing TikToks like clashing each other. - For the love of Ayame. - For the love of Ayame. - Okay. - And the other day Yuval wrote vows to Ayame. Juicy. - Mm. - Juicy. - Okay, what the fuck? - Go on TikTok and pull up Yuval's letter. - My dearest Ayame. - Oh, turn up. - It feels strange to say after finding you tired and tired again. - Yeah, quite a bit. - But the truth is I've been lost a long time.

Years I spent searching for a pixelated picture frame in the background of my own life. Unable to even locate what city I was in. I was terrible at finding myself, but for some reason I had no trouble finding you. I was terrible at finding myself, but for some reason I had no trouble finding you. You taught me that it was possible to find something I didn't even know I was looking for. This started as a momentary hyper fixation and it's turned into my life. I wish I could be there to tell you this now.

I'd blame my absence on logistics, but that wouldn't be entirely true. The truth is I'm scared. I'm scared of what'll happen when I truly find you. And I need to know I'll be ready when I do. And I will if God wills it. And it appears she shall. Somehow I can't find the words to describe what I'm feeling in this painful moment. I know you asked for vows, so here they are. I vow to find the words to tell you what you deserve, and when I do...

Bro, spin!

Yeah. Okay. So, yeah, yeah, yeah. So, bro, that's what's popping at the minute on TikTok. These man, and he did some secret little placement thing on like a coffee shop. He was like, I want you to go to, he's like, oh, you know how you like to go to this coffee shop all the time? He's like, not the regular one, the one you went to on like fucking May 16th or something like that. Go to that one at 3 p.m. There's going to be a little note on one of the tables for you.

- Jesus. - Yeah, he's doing international embargoes. - Jesus. - Yeah, you've all spit in. - Show me this Oliver, brother. - Oliver's trying to fuck up the bag. - Yeah. - Far left, that 5.9. Yeah, this is the event. Yeah, this is what started the whole thing. - I'm a name on the list. - I'm a name on the list. You'll always be my first. Yo! - Jeez. - You've all on it. So yeah, bro, they're fighting for our heart at the minute. - Okay. - I'm saying plot twist.

If you have all touches down, I'm saying we get the three of them in a room, we get them on the couch and we just let them speak. - Say less. - Yeah, bro. It's juicy, bro. It's juicy. So I'm putting the feelers out now. If you man are ready to squash this and find out, yeah, really, really what's good.

Ayame, Yuval, Oliver, we can get you on the SNG couch and we can hash this out. - Yeah, man. This love triangle can be a linear thing. - Yeah, bro. We can find, we can double up. Yeah, maybe Ellis will put his hat in the game. You never know. You never know, bro. You never know what's gonna happen in these situations. - True, true. - Ellis will spit. - Yeah, Ellis can spit, of course. - Yeah.

Naughty. But anyway, so that's what's going on on TikTok right now. It's enticing, bro. Fair play. And what's really, really cool about it as well is Yuval thing, in order to get people wrapped up in it, obviously he's done like a donate to...

He did a Palestine thing, right? Yeah. So donate to this like Palestinian cause. And then I'll come to London. So he's obviously utilizing the snowball effect of the virality of this situation to donate to good causes, bro. This guy's living it up. Doing the damn thing, man. It's juicy. Fair play to him. Anyway.

- Back to regular business. - All right. - Regular program. - I'm somewhat locked in. I want them on a sofa, I'm not gonna lie. I want them on a sofa. I wanna figure out who's really on it. - Who's really about it. - Yeah, who really wants love. - Yeah, facts. - Or who's here for the TikTok. - Who's here for the TikTok and who's actually here for it for it. - Yeah. - Yeah. All right, bro, the feelers are out. - The feelers are out. I know all you men watch the show anyway, so just comment below. - Yeah, obvs. - Just comment below. - Comment below and see if we can pattern it. - We can pattern it. We can have you on. - Yeah, man. So sick.

- Question of the week. We're back to our regular degular. And the question of the week this week was, what's the worst thing you've helped someone hide? How many you got? - Not many. You know why? 'Cause I rate the fact on this one that I don't have many because bare replies was like, I ain't no snitch. I ain't no snitch. I ain't no fucking snitch. I'm not snitching.

Stand on business, I like it. - Well, to be fair, especially where you were getting your responses from, it was bait. - Yeah, yeah, yeah, it's public. - So I've got one, two, three, four, five. - I think I've got like eight or nine, so nothing crazy either. All right, cool. What's the worst thing you've helped someone hide? I helped him hide her in the attic. She fell through the ceiling. - Oh, for God's sake.

For God's sake. That's heinous. That is heinous. Heinous. All right. Worst thing you've helped someone hide, yeah? They were sending stories in this one. My mate at school, this is dread. My mate at school trod in dog shit and it somehow got in his bag. At the end of the lesson. Got in his bag? Yeah, got on his school bag. Okay. Yeah, I don't know how. At the end of the lesson, he put his bag on his lap. So now he's got dog shit on his shirt and the front of his trousers.

Hell on earth. He asked me to help him, so I pretended to fall off my chair so he could get out in the commotion. Yeah, yeah, that's a friend. That's a friend. That's a boy. That's a friend. Fair play. To get out of the commotion. Fair play. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Would you do that for me? Yeah, of course. Okay. You wouldn't. I wouldn't fall on the floor to save you from dog shit. In a classroom. I would. If you had to scream and shout and flap on the floor. I would. In school. I would. You would? Yeah. Fair.

- Like, I'm not the one in dog shit. That's no brainer for me. - So what happens when I get out of the commercial and now what you doing? - I'm standing up. - And just be like what? - I'm fine now. - Oh, fair. - I'm fine now. What else is there? - Yeah, fair enough. I'm here, G. I would expect you to be like, I'm not embarrassing myself like that. - I don't know, that's minor. - Okay. - What's the worst thing you've helped someone hide? My friend hid chlamydia treatment in her boyfriend's drink.

- Wow. - Yeah. - I'm sure a lot of people have done that. - That is bonkers. - Yeah, I'm sure a lot of people have done that. - That's bonkers, yeah. - Yeah. - Yeah. - Yeah. - A girl I used to talk to, but never, oh wow, this is the same thing. No it's not, but yeah. A girl I used to talk to.

It's actually completely different. Yeah, yeah. But never smashed. One night, I asked her why she never gave me any. She showed me her STD papers from the doctor, and I was like, wow. I tried calling my boy, but he wouldn't pick up, only to find out they smashed raw. I kept a zipped lip and never said anything. Wait, what? So he was about to clap the ting. But she's already clapped his boy. So, no, no, no, that was it. So...

He used to talk to her. He asked her, how come you never let me hit? She showed a paper, STD ting. I'm assuming time lapse or something happened. And then the boy's about to clap it. So he's belling the boy. Like bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro, bro. He's answering. So once he knew that, once he found out they smashed war, he was like, I'm not even gonna say nothing. - Okay. - That's your boy, I will tell. I will tell you. I'll tell you immediately. - Of course I'm telling you. - The fuck?

Of course I'm telling you. What the fuck? All right, cool. Say less. Next one. What's the worst thing you've helped someone hide? Curry goat, rice and peas, and two K.A. grapes. There were eight Jamaicans around. That's funny. That's actually funny. I hate... The thing is, K.A. grapes are not even the best flavor. It's not. But it just resonates. Yeah, it does. It does. Two K.A. grapes. There were eight Jamaicans around. That's hilarious.

What?

- Beg to not tell pops. - Don't tell my dad. - I won't. - Facts. - I won't. - Yeah. - Why is it always solo donor? - Yeah, yeah. - Barter. - What's the worst thing you've helped someone hide? I watched my brother's side chicks kids for a whole summer and hid it from the husband's wife. Did I even land? His brother was smashing a married woman

And while he was smashing the married woman, the little brother was looking after the kids. I watched my brother's side chicks kids a whole summer and hid it from the wife. Yeah. The wife? From the brother's wife? The brother's wife. Yeah. Oh, cool. Cool, cool, cool, cool, cool, cool. Complex. Yeah. Very complex. Right. So, oh my God, this one's horrible. So when I was a kid, my dad used to go on tons of business trips.

My job was to clear out the car when it got back. And as you can already guess, I used to clear out empty condom packets. Now every time I feel bad about cheating, I'm consoled by this memory. Thanks, Dad.

And as you can guess, as you can guess, Conan rappers galore. Like that standard. Standard. Wow. Because that's on business trips. Wow. Wow. Yeah. Did you not even catch the end? Oh, I heard the end. I heard the end. But that I don't know why that bit spun me the most. The end spun me, bro. I said, thanks, dad. Because every time I get a guilty conscience, I just remember this is dad's back.

And I'm consoled. Yeah, this is normal for me. It's hereditary. Apples and trees. Yeah, it doesn't fall far from. Jesus Christ. Newton's laws. Wow. All right. Worst thing you've helped someone hide. Our shared pocket pussy. Our shared pocket pussy. That's disgusting. That's disgusting. Oh, God. That's disgusting. Right. My last one. The worst thing you've helped someone hide. The other baby. Rah. The other baby.

How are you hiding that? Easy. You're thinking too physical. Donnie's got a wife and a kid. Yeah. And he's got a ting and a kid. Okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay, okay. And there's a brethren in the middle hiding. Okay. Okay. Fucking hell. Yeah, you thought physical hide and seek. Yeah. Nah. I helped my boyfriend hide the fact that he's gay from his family before they caught him with my brother. Damn.

He couldn't keep that offence. Mad. Offence is crazy. Worst thing you've helped someone hide? Her car. Because her side man bought it for her. Her main thought was mine for two years. What's actually the point? It's crazy. Last one. My two friends had a threesome with my other friend's baby daddy whilst she was pregnant. I'm ready to put my foot down. I think women are worse than men, you know? 100%.

I'm actually ready to put my foot down. - 100%. - Women are worse. - They're more calculated in a conniving way. - Yeah, like that stuff's insane. - That wouldn't happen in a male friendship group. It just wouldn't. - It's impossible. - It wouldn't. - It wouldn't. - It's impossible. - It just wouldn't. - It's impossible. - It just wouldn't. - There's nothing to discuss. - It wouldn't. - Yeah, women love banging their friend's man. They're obsessed with it.

- Yeah, we need to pull out a poll or something. - Yeah, yeah, 100%. - 'Cause this is crazy. - Oh, it was confirmed in the Girl Code episode. Every other response was banged my friend's man. - Yeah, yeah. - Banged my friend's man. - Or flirted or lipsed or this or that, whatever. - Banged her husband. - That's wild, man. - Yeah, it's crazy. - Huh, wow. - Anyway. - The streets. - The streets are freezing. - Mm. - Yeah. - Welcome to the show, guys. - Welcome to the show, guys. Welcome back. So.

- News update. We're changing the pitch. - Talk to him. - We are officially number 18 in the world on Patreon. - Bow. - We wanna be at least number three.

That means you guys have a job to do. Yeah. Everyone has a job to do. Head on over to patreon.com forward slash shits and gigs. Also on Patreon, we have the second biggest internet show on the planet. It's called The Log Cabin. Facts. Where we do really, really, really cool stuff that we all spoke about doing. It's really, really competitive. It's really, really fun. Recently, we went and did Ninja Warrior. We did. We learned how to skateboard. We did. We jumped out of a plane. We did. We did a cooking competition. We did. We did.

What else we've done on there? We actually learned more about each other with Who's More Likely To. Facts as well. We've done some Q&A stuff on there. It's really, really good. It's really, really fun. Played some retro games on there. Yeah. Yeah. So anyway, guys, head on over to patreon.com, foursashitsandgigs. Join the log cabin. Enjoy yourself. It is literally groundbreaking, unbelievably good content. Cool. Right. I have a small update. I have taken a break from my whoop.

yes for one week just to get the skin indentations out yeah yeah uh and to wash my bands yeah um i miss it you man i'm gonna be honest i bet i miss it i'm used to it yeah bro every morning i'm like what's my recovery yeah what's my sleep and yeah i need the stats to tell me whether i've slept or not yeah i don't know yeah it's crazy but i need to know if i'm working out properly or not

So I think I'm on like day flipping three or four without it. I'm gonna finish up the week because I said I was, and then I'm jumping straight back in. We've got a month before we go to America. You think I'm fucking joking when I say, snatch little kitty cat. Say less. All right. My-

with the cum gutters, them things there, I'm gonna wear my trousers at my pubic bone. - Yeah. - Yeah. - Ah! - Yeah. - Ah! - Yeah. Jeans, you man are gonna see me in jeans, blue jeans, no boxers. - Crop top. - Yeah, sat just above my pubes, bro. - What's my man say? What's that musician called that sang topless? Old breader, black breader, brown...

- What's that song called? D'Angelo. - D'Angelo. - D'Angelo. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. ♪ Have it your way ♪ - That's the fella. - Yeah, yeah, oiled up like D'Angelo, bro. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - Come gutters galore. Just asking people, how does it feel? - How does it feel indeed? - Yeah, yeah, yeah. Damn! D'Angelo was jacked as shit. - Yeah, he was jacked, he was jacked. - Yeah, exactly how he's wearing his trousers there is exactly how I'm gonna wear mine for three months straight.

So yeah, I've got four weeks to get in D'Angelo condition. Yeah. D'Angelo condition. Brown sugar D'Angelo is where we're looking to be. Brown sugar, baby. Yeah. No gap necessary. Come on. So yeah, that's where we're at. So I've got four weeks to get there. I've been eating steak and veg for the last three days. Yeah. I've been drinking water like it's going out of fashion. I'm on it. Good. I've been going to the gym at seven o'clock in the morning. Good. I'm on it. But now I need to get my week back to actually...

Lock in, lock in. Yeah, I hear you. Exciting times. I hear you, bro. Exciting times. I've got a thread if you're interested. Oh, yes. I'm always interested in threads. Okay. So this thread I found on Instagram. It said, if you followed your childhood dream job, what would you be right now? Okay. Some of the sources are fucking hilarious. I wouldn't be here. I wouldn't be here. Where would you be? Driving an ice cream truck, my G.

I've done told you, man. I wanted to be an ice cream truck driver since I was in like year four. I wouldn't be here. - Wow, fair. The way you said it, I wouldn't be here. Like say you're still gutted that you're not. I wouldn't be here. Wow. One bro said either a soldier or an Argos delivery driver.

- Fair. - What child looks at an Argos delivery driver and be like, "Oh, that's the shit." - That's the dream. - That's the shit. They probably want to just take all the stuff. - Yeah, they were gassed off what was being brought to them. - Oh, 100%. - So we're looking forward to seeing Argos man. - Yeah, neutral bullets galore. - Gassed. - Yeah. Okay. What was your dream job as a kid? - A cat. - Brother? - A cat. There were bear-ities. - Jesus. - Yeah, right. This one was me. I'd be a super Saiyan.

- Fucking facts. - Do you man understand how desperate I was to be a super saiyan as a kid? - Oh my God. - I would sit there screaming. I would go in my bubble bath, put the bubbles on my head till it spikes up like that. - No you never. - And just be there splashing and screaming. - No you never. - 100%.

Why would I not? - How high was the ting? - As high as I could. But obviously my mum was frugal with the bubbles in it. So there's only so much saying I can get. - So much saying. That's jokes. - And I remember we had hardwood floors in our bathroom. - Yeah. - And one time I was,

Gassed bro. So I stood up in a bath naked as fuck. And then just, I thought I could jump out of the bath and land it like Superman landed. When I say bro, I two foot jumped out this bath and slit as soon as I smacked my head on the bath and laid there just bubbly and naked. My mom screamed like, what's going on? - You were winded. - I was like, you couldn't speak.

And I was like, bro, the Saiyan life is not for me. - Oh God. - I'm never gonna make it. - That's hilarious. That is hilarious. - Oh bro, these men would gas you into thinking you could be anything. - Facts. That's facts. Jesus Christ. - A super Saiyan. - Yeah. There's nothing more I wanted than being like an animated character and just living the dream. - Yeah, bro. I used to sit, I told you man, at Ninja World the other day, patreon.com/shitsandgears.

The doorway situation, the Spider-Man doorway. I jumped on that bitch, yeah. Bro, yeah, I would lick my hands and lick my feet and just pounce in there and stay there and scream, mum. Yeah. Call me Peter. If you followed your dream job, what would you be now? Turning the letters on the wheel of fortune.

- Fair? - Yeah. - Fair? Okay, fair. I like that answer. I like that answer. Fair. That's nostalgia. Wheel of Fortune. - Wheel of Fortune, bro. - Wow. Yeah, yeah, yeah. - To be fair, I used to think, not that I wanted that job, but I used to think that job's lit.

Carol Vorderman. - Numbers and letters. - Yeah, I was thinking she's just laying, turning, - Turning cards, yeah. - Consonants. - Consonants is fast. - Just turning consonants and you're just banging, just standing there, turning consonants. - Yeah, but she would do mental math as well. - Oh, the math thing was crazy. - Yeah, math thing was crazy. - Even homegirl now is the math thing is crazy. - Yeah, she's lit. I don't know her name, but she's lit. - She is lit. You man don't understand how many of these responses there were. A male porn star.

- Really? - Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. My early like 14, 15 maybe. Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. - It didn't make sense that that's a job. - Yeah. - Banging girls. - I was thinking these man are living the dream. How would man them getting away with this? That's why I kept on thinking to myself. - There can't be a salary. - Yeah, how's man's getting away with this? - Yeah, yeah. - Yeah, 'cause they're just banging langers.

- And even if they're not banging Lakers, they're getting paid to bang the ones that aren't Lakers. - Oh, 1 million percent bro. It didn't make sense to me, man. - That's crazy. - I think it was the only thing that knocked me out of that fantasy was what was that show bro? Euro Trash.

Was that on MTV or something? It was on Sight and Crazy, bro. I remember the name. I can't remember what channel it was on. I do remember the name, though. Bro, there was a show called Eurotrash. I'm pretty sure. It was on a music channel. Yeah, it was Sight and Rogue, and it was on at like 2 in the morning. And when I say these, it was just like an interview thing, and they would just interview porn stars all the time. And they'd interview the male ones, and it just seemed dull.

- Really? - Yeah, it really did. And I was like, this doesn't seem fun. And I remember, I'm pretty sure Luther did one on porn one time. - Fair. - Again, dark. And there was another documentary I watched. I was clearly locked in. I was doing market research. There was another documentary I watched one time.

Well, there's one broski. This is one that knocked me out. This one broski was working as like a dream boy. It's like a stripper. Okay. So what Donnie would do, he'd do his stripper ting and he'd be like dancing for the middle-aged women. And it just looked horrendous. And there'd be in some broken down nasty club in like Slough or somewhere. And then they'd get through that.

And then he'd go and wash all the oil off. Yeah. And then he'd go straight from that job in this dingy club to drive to some bando looking thing and bang,

like bang a girl 'cause his other job was a porn star. So then he'd like bang this girl and they'd be really formal when they meet. They'd be like, "Oh, hi, hi, how are you?" And then they'd like, he'd get naked over there, she'd get naked over there and then they'd meet in the middle of the bed and it was like, oh, this makes me sick. And then they'd do their shoot, they'd do their scene. And then once it's all said and done, like she would like clean herself up and go and he'd be like, "Oh, it's really late, I'm probably just gonna sleep here." And he'd sleep on like- - On set? - On set.

I just turn off the lights and sleep there. And I was like, nah, this ain't it. What? This ain't it, bro. This ain't the life. Yeah, that's back in the 90s. Yeah, bro. I looked at it, I said, that's not the life, bro. Wow. I was convinced this was the dream job. Wow. Not the life at all. Yeah, that sounds horrendous. Yeah, it looked horrendous, bro. That sounds absolutely horrendous. Also, with like, obviously we're speaking on porn now, like the actual dynamic of, OnlyFans aside, like, let's go like cameras, crew, lighting, everything, like,

the dynamic of banging the chick or multiple people whilst multiple other people are there just trying to do their job is insanity to me that was nuts yeah it's not it's insanity it was um it was episode of californication okay where the agent i can't remember what's that agent's name again charlie charlie so charlie was in love with the porn star in one season and

He agreed to let them shoot a scene at his house. And then I think something went wrong with the male actor and he couldn't do the scene and they didn't need his face in it. So Charlie got roped in to do in the scene.

- The pressure? - When he came up in his little robe, the pressure's like 30 man with cameras there. And the chick's just waiting. She's like, "It's okay, you can do it." And he was like, "Oh, okay." - No, I couldn't hear that. - Yeah, no, no, no. - I couldn't hear that. - "It's okay, you can do it." - There's not a softer texture in this dimension than what would be between my legs at that point.

- Oh God. - It would never run, bro. - It wouldn't. - It would never in a million years run, bro. - Fuck that completely. - Oh my God. - Very good show though. - Yeah. - This or Entourage? - Now you're asking bro. What's that thing called? Sophie's Choice, is that what it is? That one didn't land at all, did it? You know about Sophie's Choice? - Not for me, I actually don't know the reference she was making. - Oh, it's off it, but. - Sorry, really. - It's basically a woman picking which one of her kids should die. - Wow. - Anyway. - Right. - Anyway.

- Didn't land, didn't land. Californication or Entourage, I've probably watched them both twice over. I would say I'm leaning, I think Californication is a better show. And Hank Moody is the man, every man's man.

but it doesn't make sense how he's getting all these gyal. So it inspired me, but also demotivated me because I was like, it's not making sense. He was getting gyal, bro. Every season. I'm pretty sure he patterned Megan good in one season. But what are we talking about? This is a paid advertisement for better help. Bro. Talk to me. Real quick. Ask me what my self-care non-negotiables are. What? Grounding. Grounding.

Wim Hof breath work. Yeah. Eight hour sleep. Non-negotiables. Those are three perfect non-negotiables. And I'm proud of you. Thank you very much. I'm very, very proud of you. It's like when people say never skip leg day, but it's never skip therapy day. We all know how easy it is for our schedules to become overwhelmed with social gatherings and other obligations that leave us struggling to make time for the things that fill our own cups. 100%. It's like when your schedule is packed with big work projects and more.

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Betterhelp.com slash gigs pod today to get 10% off your first month. That's betterhelp, H-E-L-P dot com slash gigs pod. Yeah. Yeah, he was getting too many gal, bro. He bought a Porsche one day and then banged a girl who sold it to him in the car. It's just like, it's not making any sense. But I really, really love California K-Show. The ups and downs used to send me though. Entourage, I think I enjoyed more because it was actually a life that I could dream.

was like... Feasible. It's the least feasible thing. But the idea of being a movie star and you and all your boys move into a mansion and then just paint the town red and then you have the ups and downs, highs and lows. It just seemed so sick, especially around the time that we were watching it. We were all living together at that time. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Bro, what a dream, man. It's entourage for me, to be honest, because same again, like I was like so...

sucked into their reality. Like I thought that this was achievable for us. - I don't know who was gonna, it was probably gonna be Jacob. - Yeah. - Yeah. - Yeah. - Yeah. - Yeah, at the time. - And I think that bred some resentment in me because I expected, I expected that from him. - You did. - 'Cause it never happened. - I hear you, I hear you, I hear you. - It never happened, bro. I thought once Jacob makes it. - We're all out. - We're going to move to LA into a mansion and we're all patterned. - Yeah. - He made it and then nothing happened. - He went on his way.

He went on his way and just waited for us. - Yeah, bro. He waited a decade. - Oh. - Yeah, it never happened. - Jesus Christ. - Fuck. Yeah, I actually do remember that. I remember thinking this is gonna be us. - That's hilarious. - Who would you be? - In Entourage. - In the Entourage. - Pull up the cast again, I really don't remember. Obviously there's my man, there's his brother, there's Turtle. - There's Turtle. There's Eric, there's Turtle. There's... - Zoom in please as well. - Johnny Drama.

Eric, Turtle, Johnny Drama and that's it really isn't it? Vincent, Ari Gold. Megan's obviously Ari. Megan will definitely be Ari. I think I'll be Turtle, you know? Turtle was like, I think Turtle, if I remember correctly, Turtle was the one that had a bit of sense about him in terms of... You're thinking incorrectly. Really? Turtle was the one... I'm seeing his face and it's reminding me of... Eric was the one with sense.

Eric became his manager. - Okay. - Vince's manager. - Yes, yes, yes. - Dora the Drama was obviously the loser brother. - Yeah, yeah, we remember that. - Yeah. And then Turtle was the one that's like, girls would be like, "Ah, I'll bang you if you introduce me to Vince." - Oh, yeah. - And he's like, "Gang, I'm here for it." Turtle was the one that was just there for vibes. Just, he was the only one who was truly, truly, truly there for vibes. - I mean, I still got a pattern that, you know, I'm not gonna lie to you. At that age? At that age, yeah.

Just there for vibes, yeah. I'll bang you if you introduce me to Jacob and you would have been like, yeah, cool. Vibes, bro. 10 years ago? Vibes. Fair. It's fair. Yeah. Not me, boy. My pride can't handle that. 10 years ago? Yeah, not me. This was about Mark Wahlberg, isn't it? Yeah, it's loosely based on Mark Wahlberg's life. I...

- Before Rem gets to speak, I'm just gonna claim Eric. I'm not taking, if you're taking Tyler, I'm not taking Johnny. - Yeah, Johnny can do one. - Yeah. - I'm sorry, Johnny can do one. - I'm not taking Johnny, bro.

He was on the ropes. He was on the ropes. Struggling. Lloyd! Oh, man. What a show. What a show. I might watch it again, you know? Yeah, it's a very good show. Eight seasons. Wow. Was there a movie as well, if I'm mistaken? Yeah, there was. It was good. Good movie as well. I can't remember the movie, but yeah. What a time. He patterned, Vince patterned

Emily Ratajkowski in that movie. Oh, fair play. Yeah, he stays pattern and baddies, bro. Fair play. I remember at the end of season one or season two, he's about to get on a private jet and he asked someone to get, he asked Ari, he asked someone, can you give me Scarlett Johansson's number? And then he gets it and he just starts chirping her. And I was like, what world is this guy living in? Jesus Christ. Yeah, what world is he living in, bro? Vince was cleaning up. He was. What's he been in since this?

Nothing, bro. This was eight seasons long. I ain't seen him in shit. He looks 47. Wow. Devil Wears Prada.

Oh yeah. - I don't remember that at all. - He's a... - Is he the love interest? - He's the... No, not the interest. He's her main boyfriend in Devil Wears Prada. - I've never seen the Devil Wears Prada, bro. - Anne Hathaway? - Yeah. - Yeah, Anne Hathaway. Vinny. - Meryl Streep as well. - Is Anne Hathaway's boyfriend in that. - Okay, cool. - Right. Where did this even come from? - I was mid-thread. - Oh yeah, shit. - Oh wow. - Yeah, we stepped to the left. All right, let me finish this up real quick. I'm just gonna bang him out. Pause.

If you followed your childhood dream job, what would you be right now? A police dog. That's a sick one. A police dog. Yeah. That's a sick one.

As a kid. Hang on, what? Yeah. As a kid, when you see a police dog working with the force and they're obviously sniffing, sniffing, sniffing, you can't comprehend how sick it is that this dog has a specific job to only find drugs. Like in your mind, you're deep in. That's what it's there for. And the connection between obviously man and dog is amazing. And now it's got this extra job on top.

- You never thought I was cool as a kid? - Never. - Seeing police dogs? - In my entire life, never. - I still to this day think police dogs are cool. The jobs that they have, even dogs for the blind as well. Do you know how intelligent they are? - I mean, I understand that they're intelligent. I've never saw it and thought, yeah, that's me. - Yeah, I wanna be a dog as a kid. - Because the bond between man and dog is so strong. - Yeah. - As a kid. You man are not deep in it. You're not deep in it.

- I know there's an extra dog on top. - You said some stuff in the show, Red. - That's real. As a kid, seeing a police dog is like the Alsatians and that. And when you're seeing how Aggie they get. - And the dogs for the blind. - All right, brother. - The bond between man and dog.

- You said some stuff on this show, but that is funny. - Wow. - Say less. - Wow. - Fair play bro, each to their own. - Good fam to each. - Right. Oh, if you followed your childhood dream job, where would you be right now? A competitive eater. That was me. - Facts. - I mean, when I used to watch "Man vs Food", I was like, Adam Richmond is the boss, bro. - Yeah, "Man vs Food", what a time. - Adam Richmond is a boss, bro. - He does something else now, doesn't he? Or he did something else after that. - Yeah, I'm pretty sure he lives in the UK now as well. - Yeah, he's got a show on Netflix right now.

Adam eats Britain. - That's the one. - Pause it now, pause it now. - Yeah. - Next one, a dinosaur. Next one, this was me working in Toys R Us. - Wow. - This one, this one had a million of the same responses. - Trigger. - Working in Toys R Us. Oh yeah, you don't know what that, you don't even know what a uniform looks like. - Trigger, I don't know what that looks like.

I don't even know what the uniform look like. Wow. I just know the colors of the toys are in the us. That's crazy. - Toys are us. I was so upset that my mum wasn't the mum that would let me ride the bikes round the shop. - Round the shop, yeah. - Some mums just didn't give a fuck, bro. And everyone had their own scooter. Everyone's playing football in there.

oh, that some kids were allowed to do what they wanted. My mum wouldn't let us in until we knew exactly what we were buying. - Wow, how would you know though? - Exactly. - It's like going food shopping and saying you're just sticking to your food shopping list. You don't know until you see it. - Yeah, she wasn't playing games, bro. She was like, tell me what you want. We're not just going, let's go Toys R Us and figure shit out. What do you want, big man? And I'm like, okay, I want a Beyblade. Cool, we're walking in, we're walking straight to the Beyblades.

You're picking your baby and we're leaving. - Parents didn't want their kids to be happy. Our generation's parents didn't want their kids to be happy. And that's a fact. That's a fact. - Yeah, the fact you've never been toys with us is insane. - Insanity. - Where did you get your toys? - Argos gifts, I guess. - Oh, come on. - Yeah, I didn't play with that many toys when I was a youth. That's on God. - That's sad. - It is sad, but I'm 33 and I don't care. - Yeah, fair. Well, don't you? Because we've had this conversation three times. - Yeah, but I play into it. - Yeah, fair, fair, fair, fair.

Right. Last one. This one had bear of the same. Repeat, repeat, repeat. WWE champion. Oh, wow. I loved wrestling. Wow. Yeah, that's the one for me. Wow. I'm not champion because I would never have wanted to fight like that. But I was so engulfed with that shit. I can imagine, bro. Yeah. Wow. Yeah, that was me. That was really me. Damn, bro. I don't know what. I don't know what.

- If I followed my dream, just to be fair, athlete. - Yeah. - I was so adamant I was gonna be running the Olympics. - Was, how old, is this secondary school times or are you talking about primary school? - Primary school, Olympics, secondary school, NBA. - You had dreams, brother. - Fuhat! - You had, not to say your dreams haven't been successful today, but you've had dreams. - Oh, bro.

Bro, my parents gaslit me into thinking it was possible. - I mean, that's also a good thing. - It's a good thing 'cause they love me. But the way my dad would be like, you think you're going, bro, summer holidays, I would be at my dad's house in his village, his fuck all to do there, and there was an outdoor court.

It was like 20 minute walk from his house. Bro, if there was ever a day when we were, we used to say my dad's for three weeks and my mom's for three weeks. If there was ever a day that I wasn't on that court, my dad would be there like, you think you're gonna make it to the NBA? You think Kobe Bryant's just sitting at home playing PlayStation, bro? He was out there training and I was like, fucking facts he was, bro. Let me go play. I'll play for eight hours a day. Just me. Eight hours a day practicing basketball. For what? For what?

- Fair though. - For what? - He pushed you though. - He pushed me bro. - Fair play to him. - He pushed me. - Fair play to him. - Until it was time for me to be like, "Mom, can you drop me to training?" - Yeah. - There's no training needed. - This is all a dream. It's all a dream, James. Stop, wake up. - Oh my God. - No one's dropping you to training. - Fuck man. - Yeah, yeah. - That's what I'm saying about parents, our parents. - Yeah bro, I remember. - They didn't really want it for us. - She dropped me one time. After that time she was like, "If you think I'm doing that again,

Figure it out. Oh my God. I was like, all right, it's charged then. It's literally charged. That's a shame. It is. It was a shame, but game is the game. Right, you've got a dilemma for us now. I do. I've resorted to our favorite ghost writers. Oh, you found a juicy one? Yeah, I found a juicy six brown chicks. My wife and I had a fight about how I am selfish with my money. I surprised my wife at a new job, intercepted her Uber ride and scooped her for a date. I recreated our first date.

I took her out. I took her to our favorite secluded spot. We talked a Chipotle. You've seen this one. I've read this one. We talked a Chipotle in the truck. I've got comments. Under the stars. We kissed. She was hesitant during foreplay. She said, I want to shower first, but she smelled good to me. I played in her panties and there was a condom inside. We don't use condoms.

Wife reveals she was an escort. She works outside the building and that her Uber driver was a paying client. She didn't apologize. Instead, she was annoyed. Your date cost me $75. I don't know what to do. Advice. That is such a whirlwind. Your Uber driver was a paying client. You owe me 75. That's not my wife I'm looking at.

How are you also not knowing your wife's an escort? I'm pretty sure in the future, when we're all married, we could all look at each other with confidence and say, if my wife was an escort, I don't think I'd know about it. Why? Because for one, we just want peace. That's a fact. We just want peace and none of us are insecure enough to worry about what she's doing when she leaves between the hours of 7 and 11.

Monday, Wednesday and Friday. - That's also a fact. - She says she's going to bingo. - She's going bingo. - Looks like she's going to bingo. - With a girl. - And I get peace and quiet every Monday, Wednesday and Friday. - Hey, there's no complaints here. - There's no complaints, bro. It's a perfect marriage. - Fair play, fair play. - You're not gonna be thinking, "My wife's an escort, what's she doing?" - Fair. - Yeah.

- Fair. - And then if someone's like, "Oh, do you think she's out banging other guys?" And you'd be like, "She wouldn't dare." - Facts. Why would that even cross your mind? - She would ruin all of this? - For that? - Impossible. - Yeah. - Impossible. - These times she's on a street corner. - Corner with doms inside her. - Yeah. - That. - Yeah. - I said he was playing with her pussy in a car and felt a condom. - I would jump outside of my skin. - Like,

- How is she not also like noticed that it's still in there? - She knows exactly what's still in there. She said, "Let me shower." - True, she did say, "Let me shower." He said, "No, baby, you smell good to me." - You smell good to me. That's diabolical. - That's another guy's scent on her. That's what that is. That is diabolical. - I don't wanna think about stuff like that, man. - That is diabolical. What a dilemma. - What a dilemma indeed. - What a situation to be in. - As soon as you started the first sentence, I was like, "I've read this." - Yeah, what a situation to be in. Crazy. - Speaking of situations to be in, do you know what I watched the other day?

- I can't remember what it's called. The thing on Netflix, the fucking fake footballer impersonator. - Yeah. - Something, something. - The girlfriend who, I've not seen it. Football fraudster, something, something. - The football fraudster is exactly what it's called. - I'm not seeing it. - I thought you were talking about what you'd already brought up before in the past. The NFL guy.

The fake girlfriend. The fake girlfriend. Catfish. That was hell. That was hell. That was actually a guy. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It was a guy. Yeah, that was a guy. It was untold, I believe. Yeah, yeah, yeah. That was hell. But it's called Football Fraud. Put it up, please. Football Fraudster, bro. I've seen the trailer, but I've not seen the show. One Congolese brother was moving mad. He patterned one Love Island ting. Mm-hmm.

Yeah, took her for a ride. So basically, long story short, that smirk, that smirk is all you see the whole documentary. That smirk is all you see. Is he Congolese? Yeah. Ah, I could tell. Bro! I could tell. He was smirking everyone. Jesus. When I say, so basically...

He was calm at football, innit? Not amazing. But cool, he played for a couple of teams here and there. But what he was doing, bro, when I say this guy, he had an undying urge to live the life. He went to Penn multiple times for fraud. So wherever he was at, he was stealing credit card details, bro. Oh. Yeah, so when he was with this Love Island thing, so what he would do, he'd be living off one person's credit card and he'd go to Mayfair. He'd be all up in the clubs, bro.

Pat and the ting, love bomber, steal the credit card details. Now he's spending off two. So as one credit card is getting canceled, he's already moved on to the next. So bro, he was moving mad, bro. And he could be anyone he wanted to be, bro. He could do all the accents easily. Really? So to her, he put an R on from Georgia. And to only her, he's got an American accent. She thinks he's American. Wow. To the next thing, he's got a London accent.

To the next thing, he's got a French accent. Oh, this is Tinder Swindle all over again. Yeah, bro. He was moving crazy. Wow. So he's got girlfriend after girlfriend, bro. And he's just playing. He's like, I'm a footballer, this. So for her, for this Georgia thing, he said, oh, my mom's a celebrity in America. Can't tell you who she is. Yada, yada, yada. They're in a relationship. For the next thing, he's like, I'm a footballer. Yada, yada, yada. Because he's actually good at football, bro, he moved to like somewhere up north. I can't even remember. He moved, oh no, Scotland. He moved to Scotland with one ting.

And she knew a couple footballers. You know exactly how she knows them. They didn't get into it. Take one look at you know exactly how she knows them. Introduced Donny to the footballers. He's playing for the team now. - Really? - Yeah. Her credit card gets snagged.

He's making boys with the other players. Their credit cards are getting snagged. He's spending, spending, spending, spending, bro. And more time, these times, this is before like apps and that were bait. Like banking apps and credit card apps. So if your credit card gets snagged, bro, if you've got cake, you're not gonna know until next month's statement. Yeah. Wow. So if you've got a 30K limit on your card, bro, bro.

Donny is in there, bro. He patterned Thierry Henry's ex. Bro, he said he was like in the Marines or something. So these times, they put her Coutts card on blast as well. It was peak. On the show? On the show. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, bro. He patterned her Coutts card, was spending on there. He got sent to Penn. So just the day before he went to Penn, he called her up and said, babe, I'm going away on a mission.

"Wait for me." Bro, and he'd be be belling her while he's in pen. - A mission? - I'm going away on a mission, wait for me. He'd be in pen for a year, bro. Did his year stint in pen, came out, straight back to Henri's wife. "Babe, I'm back from my mission. "Hotels, hotels, hotels, suites, suites, suites, suites, suites, bro." Mad ting. - Wow. - And what he would do, bro, is like, he was so obsessed with the lifestyle, bro, he would go to a new city, bell them, and be like, "Ah, there's a Chelsea player

Coming up from London, he's going to be staying in like Wolves or somewhere random for a week. So he'll pattern up like a limo service. I need a driver for a week. And then be like, patterned. And he'll just be like, invoice Chelsea at the end of the week. Because we don't know how much it's going to cost because they're going to be driving me here and everywhere. So he'll pattern everything. The driver's gassed. I'm driving around a footballer. I'm driving around a footballer.

Stay in this place, stay in that place. Take me to London, take me to Scotland, take me to here, take me to there. Bro, take me shopping, take me this, take me there, take me that. Bro, mad, mad, mad, mad, mad. Another thing what he would do is he would pretend to be an American, buy everything on a credit card. And then there'll be times where he couldn't pay for his like hotel rooms or the room service or was that anymore on a credit card. So he would call the like the...

fucking driver service who are like an hour away and be like, cool, I need you to come down. I'm going to send me an invoice. I'm going to pay on my credit card. And then I need you to come down and use that money to pay for my hotel. And they'll be like, cool, cool, cool. So it ended up racking up where

He's sending them down, sending them down, sending them down. Pay for my hotel. Pay for my hotel. Pay for my hotel. Pay for my hotel. And they're like, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Calm. I'll pay for it. I'll pay for it. I'll pay for it. And then they're betting him like, oh, your credit card payment's not going through. And he's like, oh, yeah, I'm having issues because it's an American card and they've blocked it because he's like, don't worry, don't worry. And they'll just believe him. Yeah. They'll just believe him because the first few went through. Yeah. They'll just believe him. Bro, for one driver service, he racked up a hundred grand. Wow.

And Donny was chasing like, bro, you owe me a hundred grand. And because they're so scared of burning bridges, because they've heard of all these other stories where one fucking driver got a link with like a Chelsea player, which linked to another Chelsea player, which links to another player, which linked to this, which linked to that. Now anytime fucking Jamie Foxx is in the UK, all of a sudden they're using it. They're all these other drivers are hearing all these stories, bro, about success stories from all the other drivers.

As soon as they pattern footballer, they're willing to do whatever it takes. And they're thinking, bro, what's a hundred grand to him? He's good for it. And they'll always be texting them like, bro, he's good for it, he's good for it. And what made them believe that he's definitely good for it is even though they're messaging saying, bro, you need to pay this invoice, you need to pay the invoice. He'd be like, yeah, I'm on it. But he wouldn't air them. He would say, come tonight and pay for my hotel. Come tonight and pay for my hotel. But because he's still using a service, they're like, obviously he's going to pay it. Because if he was mugging me off, he would have been dipped. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

100 grand he racked up from one company bro. - Wow, that's insane. - And then every time he's in pen he's already patterned his next target. - How? - Fuhad. - That's a lifestyle. - I don't know is the answer to how. - Wow. - Yeah. - What's the breader's actual name? - Oh, I can't remember. It is, they bay it out at bear times. Medi. - Medi. - Medi Abolimba. - Abolimba. - Abolimba. - Medi Abolimba. Say less. - Yeah, he was murking everyone bro.

He had everyone on the ropes. - I don't even remember him as a footballer, like at all. - No, he was playing, oh, but you wouldn't bro. He was playing for like. - No, he wouldn't. He was pretending to be Gael. - Oh, he was pretending to be Gael. - Yeah, he wasn't actually playing for Chelsea. He was playing for some, bro, I think the best he ever got was promoted to the championship.

I see. I think he was pretending to be Gael Kakuta. Yeah, he was. Yeah, he was. He was. From Chelsea, but yeah. Wow. Yeah. He was doing this for years, bro. Was earning 300 a week in Farnborough town. Yeah, he was playing for Farnborough, bro. He got demoted to semi-pro at one point.

- Damn. - Yeah, bruv. - Damn. - It was interesting. - That's a doc. - Yeah, I watched that this week. - He was swindling things, bro. - Yeah, I watched that this week. - Wow. - Swindling things. - With a smile on his face. - Oh, he stays smiling. - Yeah, that's a con man. - Yeah, and it gets racy at one point. - Yeah. - Because there's one, when it gets to the elephant in the room because he's been impersonating Gail Cucuta for time, it gets to the point where someone's like,

"How do they think this is the same person?" - Oh God. - And then, bro, they interview like three white people in a row like, "I just think it's the, you know, the intensity of the situation is making it seem like you're just believing in the dirt." And everyone's like, "Hmm." - Yeah. - Yeah. It's tough. - Okay. - Yeah. - Okay. - It was very tough. - Interesting. - But yeah, it wasn't a bad watch. - Say less. I'll give it a watch.

Who am I? - Yes, please. - Yeah. - Yes, please. - Cool. So all I'll tell you is I'm a fictional character and I'm just gonna speak how James would speak. Take guesses and I'll tell you my story. Take guesses as of when you will. - All right. - Yeah? - Fictional character. - Fictional character. You might know the rules. None of this, are you thingy from fucking thingy? Nah, bro. - Names. - The name. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - Cool. - Cool. So from the jump, to give context, my dad,

On road, big boy. - Okay. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. Respected, caked, big boy on road. - Mm-hmm. - Okay? So one day, I'm obviously trying to take over the family business. I'm bopping through, bopping through, trying to make deals here, deals there, deals here. And on a little ransom ting, a couple of man snagged me, innit? - Mm-hmm. - So I'm thinking, these dickheads think I'm, they think I'm a pussyhole. - Yeah. - Say less. They snagged me, had me up. Was I shook? Yes.

Did I let them know? No. So they've snagged me up with one other brer as well. And they're like, ransom, ransom, ransom, ransom, ransom, ransom. I'm like, bro, these men are never going to pay the ransom. It's calm. A few weeks go by. I'm thinking, bro, I lowkey have to escape. This is getting mad. And I'm thinking they're not, the ransom's not getting paid and they're not getting what they want. So I'm going to have to get out of here. So I chat to homeboy. I'm like, bro, we're going to have to break out.

He's like on a bit of a pussy old thing. And I was like, bro, it's either we get out or we lose our lives. These men are not gonna let us out. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - So we pull up and then on a quick, we're getting out of the bandeau today, yeah? So pulled through the door, fuck around and find out. I escape. So when I escape, I'm gas now and I'm thinking, bro, I'm really him. So now I'm taking over the family business.

And the new business is literally being him. So I take what I learned from my experience over there. I upgrade myself. And now all of a sudden, I'm the biggest man on road. Are you Iron Man? Motherfucker. Iron Man! I am Iron Man! Let's go! Well played! Iron Man won, obviously. Come on, man. Well played. Come on, man. Feels good at this game. Come on, man. You'll feel good at this game. Come on, man. I'm not going to say it again. Oh, Ellis is livid. Ha ha ha!

- 'Cause I went to fucking like, I was thinking just like gangster and stuff. - Yeah, that's why I probably led you left, bro. Come on, man. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - Protect your neck. - Revasky, did you have a clue? - I had no idea, bro. What the fuck? I was not even close. - Gang, just before we finish, apologies to the audio listeners. I have a video I wanted to show you, man. I randomly stumbled across it the other day.

- When I say it is the fun, it's like three seconds long. It's the funniest fucking video I've seen in many, many years. - Okay. - Oh, I love this video. - The fan? - I love this video. - Did you read the caption of that video? - No, I don't think so. - It deployed like an airbag. That's the caption I saw. - His stomach. He felt so hard he got pregnant. - Yeah. - Bro. - Bro, he's floored.

He's flawed, bro. Deployed like an airbag is crazy. The fact that he tried to start a...

- Oh my days. He's done for. - Why would you go back on the thing? - Oh my days. - After what they just did to you. - One thing I would say about these like American family get together things, this always looks jokes. - It does look jokes. - It always looks fucking hilarious. - It does always look fucking hilarious, but at someone's expense. - Factually. - Yeah, and that's not gonna be me. - Someone's making a fool out of themselves every year. And it's always that uncle. - Bro, I dread the day that I'm unk in these situations.

I fucking dread the day that old man, Unc James, is trying to do a slip and slide and falls so hard. That your stomach deploys like an airbag. My stomach deploys like an airbag. And I can't stand up. That's crazy. For the sake of a barbecue.

Nah bro, fuck all of that. Funny though, I saw that the other day, I was like, this is the funniest video I've ever seen in my life. - It popped a button. - Bro. - Yeah, that's when you need to make some changes. - Oh, 100%. - That's when you need to make some changes. I'm getting lipo that weekend. - Yeah, I'm just, that weekend. - Speaking of lipo, I remember random, we were speaking about it obviously earlier with the bodybuilding and stuff like that. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - On Patreon, free part of a month, 10 per day, run a pee, S and G, say less. That I remember when I used to do a show,

- Who had was adamant I should get lipo. - Did I? - You used to preach lipo to me all the time. - I don't remember. - When you were asking me how's dieting going, how's this going, how's that going, I remember you'd always reply like kiss my teeth like bro, just lipo. - To me that sounds like me. - Li-po! - That sounds like me. - What are we doing? - And that sounds like me, I'm not gonna lie to you. It's the easier option. It's the easier option.

Yeah. Li-fo! That's so funny to me, bro. Fuck it up. Fuck, man. Fun times. Right. Charging? Yes. Right, guys. That's it for today. Thank you very much. We'll catch you next time. Love, love, love. Acast powers the world's best podcasts. Here's a show that we recommend.

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