I WAS TODAY YEARS OLD WHEN... | EP 375 | ShxtsNGigs Podcast 58:19

Welcome, friends, to the Playful Scratch from the California Lottery. We've got a special guest today, the Scratcher's Scratch Master himself, Juan. Juan, you've mastered 713 playful ways to scratch. Impressive. How'd you do it? Well, I began with a coin, then tried a guitar pick. I even used a cactus once. I can scratch with anything. Even this mic right here.

See? See? Well, there you have it. Scratchers are fun no matter how you scratch. Scratchers from the California Lottery. A little play can make your day. Please play responsibly. Must be 18 years or older to purchase, play or claim. This episode is brought to you by Hulu. Hulu Anime-hem is your animation destination to watch full seasons and new episodes of your favorite animated shows. Get ready to be bowled over, have your socks knocked off,

and get thrown for a loop, all in one convenient streaming location. Stream stone-cold animated favourites like Family Guy, Futurama and Bob's Burgers. And you can also catch Solar Opposites, Hitmonkey, American Dad and tons more. Plus, watch some of the freshest animated series around like The Great North, Grimsburg,

Crapopolis, and so many more. - That's right guys. If you're looking for your favorite animated shows, there's only one destination you need to remember. - Hulu Anim Mayhem, your animation destination now streaming on Hulu. - Sprints to the roof! Helicopter, sprints to the roof! Says, "Babe, babe, don't do it!" She's already gone. She's zoomed off into the skyline. - Sunset.

All right, guys. Let's talk about Whoopity Scoop. What's the Kanye bar? Flippity Scoop. Flippity Scoop. Flippity Scoop. Something like that. Yeah, Whoopity Scoop. Yeah. All right, cool. So week one of the 12-week community challenge. Yes, sir. Is, yeah. Well and underway. Is well and underway. So as we're recording this, we haven't done the full week yet, but there's some people. That aren't from this planet. Yeah.

There's some aliens in there. Turns out the babies are aliens. Yeah. And they've humbled us. And so for context, today, daddy is, I haven't trained, so bear with me. Daddy is 737th on strain. Daddy is 276th on recovery. And daddy is 514th.

In flipping sleep. I am 234th on strain. Don't know how. 511 on recovery. 600 on sleep. And I've got seven hours. I'm 600. Bro, some of these are cooking. Absolutely cooking, bro. Cooking. I think I saw, I don't think I've seen 100% recovery yet. 98 is the most I've seen. Yeah. But there's 98 in this bitch. Yeah, there are. But there's only a few, you know. Shout out to Rebecca. Shout out to Lucy May. Yeah.

Hybrid mommy, say less. Now, let's talk about strain. Because strain's becoming a joke. This Bray William, box fitness, walking, walking again, walking again, jump rope, walking again, power lifting. And it says, and one more. One more, yeah. I've never seen that before. And one more. The one above. Baseball and then manual labor. Yeah.

Joshua was a man. Joshua was a man. Yeah. Man added manual labor. That's crazy. 11.7 strain. That's more than I get in a workout. Jesus Christ. There's people out there. All right. Fair play. So it's looking like we have to step our pussy up. We have to. We've got no choice. Yeah. So week one, we were testing the water. See like, oh yeah, cool, cool, cool. Yeah. See what you man are doing. That's cute.

But now we have to actually have to step up. So well played, guys. I've seen the chats been popping. Everyone's been really, really, really helpful to each other. I'm seeing stuff in there that I didn't even know. So guys, I hope you're enjoying it. There's over a thousand people in here now. Everyone seems to be doing well. So well done to everyone that's on it.

If you were thinking, oh shit, I missed a challenge. Don't worry. It goes week by week by week. So the stats restart every single week. Okay. So all you need to do is get involved now. Go to join.whoop.com forward slash S&G. Grab your Whoop. If you want to try it 30 days, it's risk-free. So just try it for a month. See how you get on. If you don't like it,

kick it back but you will like it so it's calm so join.whoop.com/sng and then join the community challenge with us if you don't know what whoop is you're like what's this what's this what's this week pretty self-explanatory it is a wearable fitness coach it is this rolex looking thing right here user we wear it 24 hours a day uh and it monitors our strain our sleep our sleep and our recovery so far we've been doing it for like

10 weeks now. 10 weeks. Yeah, we've known for 10 weeks now and we're enjoying it. So jump in guys. And like we said, when it comes to the O2 show in May, everyone is going to be breasted up. Whooped up. Stomached out. Yeah. V-lined. Look, tapered and snatched. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Babies are going to come to the O2 looking snatched. Thanks to them. So when we exit the venue, everyone's like, oh, it's a snatch conference. Yeah.

I don't know what happened in there, but everyone's coming out snatched. O2's doing up orgies now. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Say less. Baywatch auditions. I'm trying to be part of that. Yeah, yeah, yeah. What's going on? And they're like, oh no, she's just playing. And they're like, ah, ah, makes sense. Makes sense. Two and two. Yeah. Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Yeah. All right, guys. So looking forward to catching up with you in week two. But yeah, cool. Right, guys. As you know, we hit it straight with a nitty gritty. And the question of the week was, I was today as old when I found out. I got some juicy ones. Yeah. What about you? I've got a couple mind benders. Yeah. Mind benders is the word to be fair. I've got a couple of those too. I wonder if we've got any samey sames. I feel like we would have or not.

- I purposely didn't write one down 'cause I'm thinking it's gonna be on both and you might have written it down and blah blah. - Say less, say less, say less. - Sorry, I was today years old when I found out it's hard as hail, not hard as hell. - Really? Is that facts? - I did fact check it and I believe it's correct. - Well played. - Yeah. - Rem, I need you to pull this one up. I was today years old when I learned that the Krusty Krab is a crab trap.

- A crab trap? - Yeah, that already is. I already knew that. - It's like, you know when fishermen are catching, that's what the Krusty Krab is. - Show me. - It is. It's a cage. - It's a cage for crabs. - It's a cage for crabs, it is, yeah. - And I heard another conspiracy that the Krabby Patty is actually crab meat. - Oh, that's just sick. - Yep. - That's why they can't lock into the recipe. - That's just sick. - Twists and turns. I was on Twitter going through twists and turns, bro. - Oh, wow.

- Oh wow. - People were leaking stuff. - Spongebob has loads of weird stuff. - Yeah bro. - Like sandy cheeks. It means like when you have a wet ass and you sit on the beach. - Oh. - Wait, what's that again? - Sandy cheeks. - The squirrel? - It's like when you sit on sand and you got sand in your bum. - Sandy cheeks. - Oh. - Okay. - Damn. - All right. I was today as old when I found out Evian spelt backwards is naive.

- Don't, 'cause I love everyone. - I know you do. - Don't play with me. - Don't play with me, 'cause that's my drink. - Then I say you're naive. - Naive. - You're stupid. - You've been disconcerted. - You're stupid, and you're paying what, three pound? - Yeah. - Pay it. - Yeah. - Dumb ass. - They didn't even let you take the lid off anymore. - Yeah. - Fat. - Yeah. - Keep it whole. - Fuck. - Yeah. - Naive. - Everyone live young. - Yeah. - Naive. - Naive, yeah. - Nah, I'm a waste man. I'm actually living. Okay, cool, Fiji it is.

- All right. - That's jokes. - I was today years old when I learned the twist ties, this is mainly American, but it does apply. The twist ties on bread means the day they were made. So red twist tie means it was baked on a Thursday. - Ah, okay. - We've seen that before. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - We've seen that before. - It's in the reacts. - Oh snap. - Okay, okay, okay, okay, okay. I was today years old when I found out that the N in Nutella is black. - What?

The N in Nutella is black. - What do you mean? - Pull up Nutella, G. - Swear. - These men are just getting away with stuff. - Do you know who's getting away with stuff? - Lululemon. - What, go on.

- Say no more. - Yeah, bro say no more. - Don't even inquire. - Yeah. - Do your research. - Yeah, yeah. Say no more. - The guy, I'm not saying, I don't know what they're saying, there's a brand? - Yeah. - The guy who invented Lululemon? - Yeah. - Hmm. - Say no more. - Find out why he called it Lululemon. - Say no more. Say no more. - Bro. - Oh wait. - I saw this on a, this is on a podcast, right? - Yeah.

- I know exactly what, I know exactly the answer. - Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. - Wow. - Yeah, this was on, what's that Redhead guy called? Is it on that one with- - Redhead? - Oh yeah, it was Chris DiStefano said it on Bad Friends. - Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. - Yeah, I was mind blown. - Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. - Yeah, yeah. - Say less. - Say less. - All right, go. - I was today years old when I found out that Q, the word Q,

- It's just, okay, so Q, Q-U-E-U-E, is just a Q, the letter, followed by four silent letters. - I knew, I think I knew that one for sure. - Obviously we knew that, 'cause you just say it. - Yeah, but yeah, you wouldn't- - Four silent letters, you man. - Yeah, U-E-U-E is pointless though, innit? - The whole thing is pointless. - Q, yeah. - It's just Q. - Yeah, I also,

I also don't like in the English language where two words sound the same and mean different things. Like Q and Q, like a cube for a snooker or whatever. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. Two, two and two? - Yeah, like four, four and four, like- - There, there and there. - There, there and there. - Oh, it's so jarring. And it's understandable why foreigners say English is the hardest language to learn. - Yeah, 'cause it's bullshit. - It's bullshit, bro. - We're just making up stuff. - But yeah.

I was today years old when I found out KFC's Twitter account follow 11 people, the five Spice Girls and six random guys called Herb. - Really? - I fact checked it. - Really? - Yeah. - The social media team's playing chess. - 3D chess. The chess that they play on Big Bang Theory is the chess he's playing. - Wow. - Yeah, smart. - Okay. Today years old when I found out when my dad took my birthday money to look after it, I was never gonna see that again.

We've all been there. We have been there. We've all been there. Let me look after it. We've all been there. What are piggy banks for, dad? I hadn't had nothing. Really? In my piggy bank. Nothing. I would put coins in there thinking, okay, cool. Local two pound here, local two pound there. I would rinse it before the week's end. Oh, Vax, bro. I used to have it. Before the week's end. My mum bought me for my birthday one time, like a little, so, so corny. Like a little...

actual bank, like a little ATM. So you had to put your passcode in there and it went like a little plastic thing that popped out. - Like a cash drawer. - Yeah, like a cash drawer. Exactly, like a till. It was more like a till than an ATM. Beep, beep, beep, beep, ding, cha-ching. And you just go cha-ching. And then I put all my little notes in there for my birthday, close it up. When it was dairy milk time. - Dairy milk time. - When it was galaxy cookie crumble time. - Yeah, yeah, cookie. - And I forgot my password. When I say I yanked that bitch open, I nearly broke my fingers.

I was pulling the thing until there was a gap and then I shoved like my equivalent to a crowbar in that bitch. I yanked open. Bro, I was stomping on it. I need the chocolate. Fair play. I spent all my birthday money. My sister always had money in her little piggy bank. Yeah, my brother had notes. Hundreds and hundreds of pounds. Chicken change. Yeah, chicken change. I was like, bro, but what do you do when you want to buy millions? Like, I don't.

- Starbucks ain't free. - Facts bro. - So what are you actually doing? - How are you getting your fix and keeping all your money? - 'Cause I'm spending facts. - I spent till now. - It never changed. - It doesn't change. - Oh God. - All right, cool. - Was that, did you just go? - Yeah, after money. - I was today as old when I found out when you type in home alone, it comes up with the emoji. - Really? - Yeah, fact check. - You fact checked? Yeah, you got time. Well played.

I was today years old when I found out she was playing me. She was playing me. She was playing me. Let me piggyback on that. I was today years old when I found out my dad is my neighbor. That's rough. That's rough. I was today years old when I found out news is not an acronym. It's called news because the information is new.

- Interesting. - Yeah. - I got, I was today's when I found out news is an acronym and it stands for notable events, weather and sports. - Yeah, that's what I thought. - Ooh. - Fact check please. - Fact check please. New information of interest. - People think it's an acronym, but it's not. - People actually think news is an acronym, it's not, but this mess is pretty hilarious. Wow. - Okay. - Shade. - So I guess it's just new information you say? - It's just new information. - New information.

- Thank God I was right on that one. I was certain I was wrong. Yours makes so much more sense. - Yeah, I saw it, I was thinking raw, fair. - I was today is odd when I found out if you hold down the zero button on an iPhone, you can change it to a degree sign. Fact checks as well. - I think I knew that. - I didn't. - Ah, very nice. - I never knew that. - Cool. Also, who needs degrees on an iPhone calculator? What are we doing? Today is odd when I found out that it's for all intents and purposes, not for all intensive purposes.

- For all intents and purposes. - Intents and purposes. - I've been saying intensive purposes, bro. - I think I dabble between both and just hope no one pulls me up. - Dabbling is a fucking insanity. - That's even worse. - I like playing such risky games. If I'm wrong, I'm wrong. I'm not right sometimes, I'm wrong sometimes. - All intents and purposes, all intents and purposes. Well, to be fair, I think I say intensive. I don't think I say intensive. - Yeah, I've never said intense. - All intents and purposes. - For all intents and purposes. - Intents or intent?

Intent. Oh, with an, oh, okay. This is my intent. Okay. I thought you meant like intense. No, no, no, no, no, no, no, no, no. Intense. For all intents and purposes. Makes sense. Okay. It makes perfect sense. We're living a lie, bro. This is one that pisses me off. When people are like, I could care less. Oh.

I couldn't care less. - Couldn't. - I've always said I couldn't care less. And people are like, yeah, could care less bro. I'm like, that doesn't make sense. That means you can care less. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. Okay, yeah. I've always said I couldn't care less, but yeah, I hear you. I was today as well when I found out the divide symbol is a blank fraction. The two dots get replaced with two numbers that create the fraction. - This guy's not me.

- Every one? - No, no, no. There's some I haven't known. I did know that. It was about the division symbol. - I never knew that. - I never. Who taught you that? - I think I read it somewhere online sometime. - A blank fraction? That's wild.

I think I learned a lot of these when doing the research for that Reacts episode to be fair. Oh, fair play. Okay, fair play. I always thought the burgers was supposed to get bigger when you ordered small, medium and large. When I say that's me, you man. Fair, fair, fair. It's just the chips and the drink. Bro, at one point KFC was just the drink.

- Really? - When they asked you, do you want to go large? It was just the fucking drink. - To be fair, I rarely see large chips at KFC. - They don't fuck around at KFC. Although they switched up their chips recently. You had any recently? - I haven't had KFC in a minute. - Anyone had KFC recently? Obviously not, 'cause no one likes KFC because of the chips. They switched those bitches up. - Swear. - Cajun style. - Ooh. - What, standard is Cajun? - Seasoned. - You don't get an option. - Yeah, they give them five guys. - You just click fries, comes seasoned. It slaps. - Random, I had McDonald's the other day.

Probably one of the best my daughters have ever had. Cause you know when it's just fresh. - Piping. - Yeah. The chips were banging salt ratio, banging on a three piece chicken select. I opened that box, the steam that came out. - I bet. - Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. I was eating. I was eating.

- Yeah, McDonald's, shout me. Shout me, man. Shout me. - Sometimes when it fucking hits, bro. - Jesus Christ. - I was dib-dabbing in different sauces. - Smokey barbecue? - I had a smokey barb, I had a sweet chili. He had the curry as well as the sweet and sour. I was dib and dabbing, bro. - Jesus, bro, three chickens in the lake? - Yeah. I was dib-dabbing. - That's too many sauces for three bits of chicken. - The chips, man. - That sweet curry.

- It's different. - I slept in it for most of my life. - Same, same, I got introduced to that. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - I think I introduced you to it. - Maybe, I don't know. - Yeah, yeah, yeah, one of those late nighters. - I know I got brought in. That's not my normal delicacy, I got brought in. - All right, oh, it's your go. - I was today's result when I found out my youth pastor is a liar. Men have the same amount of ribs as women. - Oh, is that true? I thought we had one less.

- Why? I genuinely don't know. - So Eve was made from Adam's rib. - Yeah. - And they used to back it up by saying men have one less rib than women. If that's a lie, when I say I've been swindled my entire life, human beings are contrary to men and women have the same number of ribs. Wow, when I say they were doubling down on this my entire life, I went to Christian, so obviously I was brought up in Luton, isn't it? So my, this is crazy. My primary school was half Muslim, half Christian. - In terms of the ratio?

- In terms of like- - In terms of education. - What does that mean? What? - Brother, we had a head teacher called Mrs. White every morning for reception. Yeah, I know. Head teacher, Mrs. White, she'd bop in there. - Yeah. - And then every single day, she would bop in there and be like, "Good morning, children." - Did you say reception, by the way? - Primary school. - Oh. - "Good morning, children." And then we would say the Lord's Prayer. And then-

No, no, no. We'd say the Lord's Prayer at the end, but she would always introduce us by saying like, As-salamu alaykum. As-salamu alaykum. As-salamu alaykum. We'd say as-salamu alaykum. Yeah, that's what we'd say. I was like seven, bro. I can't remember the thing. Fair, fair, fair. Don't teach me how to say it. As-salamu alaykum. As-salamu alaykum. And then you would say, wa-alaykum as-salam. Wa-alaykum as-salam. Yeah, that's what we used to say. That's so rogue as well, though. The fact that

Is it rogue or is it, were they trying to be ahead of the curve? - They were trying to be ahead of the curve in the best way, but Luton's a good place to start because hella Muslims. - Okay. - But when I say I wasn't in school thinking, this is weird. - Okay. - I was locked in. - This is norm for you. - This is norm. - Yeah, this is everyday. - I was locked in. And then like Ari was 50% Bible, 50% Quran. - Okay. - That's it? No other religious studies? - No.

Not in primary school. Fair, primary school. Fair, fair, fair. But yeah, that's just how it was. I don't remember doing RE in primary school. I'm not gonna lie to you. Yeah. I don't remember that much. Yeah. But that's just how it was. Fair. I was here for it. Fair. Makes sense. I mean, it wasn't as far as like...

boy and girl separated everything and all that kind of things it wasn't that far but like in terms of like little things like that educational prayer and all that kind of stuff yeah like mixed interesting and we're talking how many years ago interesting like 20 something years ago ish yeah interesting very interesting anyway okay i'm done by the way you got um today is all when i realized justin timberlake sings the chorus of where's the love in black eyed peas

I promise you I didn't know that. - Oh, oh, so sorry. When you said Justin Timberlake, my brain registered Justin Bieber. I said, that can't be true. That can't be true. - My son's older than him. - That can't be true.

But I did see that one. I did see that one on socials. I had seen this one before, but I didn't know it was true until I saw it. And the last one I've got is today years old when I realized the first episode is called a pilot because it's his first time on air. I knew that. That was going to be one of my fun facts when I was doing fun facts time ago. Yeah. That's why I knew that. Fair. Yeah. Interesting. Yeah. That was a good one. Yeah. Yeah.

Very nice. Cool. Welcome to the show, guys. Welcome to the show, guys. Welcome back. Thank you for coming. We hope you're well. So guys, you already know the drill. If you're watching on YouTube, please subscribe to the channel. If you are listening on any audio platform, please leave us a nice review. Five stars is obviously preferable. But if you hate us, just say it in it.

Just say it. And lastly, guys, if you like what we do, if you want to see more of what we do, please head on over to patreon.com forward slash shits and gigs.

It'll cost you three pound a month, run the pizza SMG and you can have four years of bonus content over there. On top of that, if you think, ah bro, these man always sitting down, I'd like to see them stand up. I'd like to see them move around a little bit. I'd like to see them cook some food, jump out of planes, play some games, do some weird shit. Stay on Patreon.

- Jump up to tier two and introduce yourself to the one and only Log Cabin Show. - Yes sir. - We are 10 episodes deep at the minute. - Come on. - And it's been an absolute trip. Very well received. We're super, super, super proud of it. The show is doing incredibly well and we enjoy it a lot. And today is a good day. - Oh, I'm flipping the script. - We're flipping the script.

Grandmaster Fuhad is stepping down into student level today. - Yep. - Because every single week he sits there behind his phone or his iPad being like, I would have got that. I would have got that. I would have got that. So today we'll find out. - We shall. - We shall find out. It's a special one. I think we actually have 10 questions. - Okay, nice. - So I'm gonna do all 10 questions guys. - Nice. - I will be the quiz master today. - Yep. - So please guys, back to school, grab your whiteboards and your pens.

And let's see what will go on. Question number one. Yes sir. How many millions are in a billion? How many millions are in a billion? Question number two. In which country would you find Machu Picchu, one of the seven wonders of the world? In which country would you find Machu Picchu, one of the seven wonders of the world? Question number three. Which of these animals is not a mammal?

A. Whale B. Shark C. Dolphin D. Seal Which of these animals is not a mammal? A. Whale B. Shark C. Dolphin D. Seal Question number one, four. In 1986, Chernobyl was the site of the worst nuclear disaster in history. In which country did this take place? I've seen the show as well.

- In 19, go on. - Sorry, I was gonna say, I started it, I didn't finish that. - Neither did I. I think I didn't watch like the last episode or two, but it was highly rated as well. - Yeah. - HBO, highly rated. - Fuck, I don't remember. - Also, reading this, I know where Fuyagas' ego. When you know the answer, you're like, obviously, I would've got it. - Yeah. - But when you're reading them though, do you know the answer before you've seen the answer? - But it's hard, I can see the answer right here, so I can't distinguish whether I would've seen it before or after. Question number five. - Yeah. - Which of the following

In Thailand, 95% of the population are followers of what religion?

In Thailand, 95% of the population are followers of what religion? Next question. Rodney loses half of an eighth of his money. How much has he lost? A. A quarter. B. One sixteenth. C. Two eighths. D. One half. Say the question again, please. Rodney loses half of an eighth of his money. How much has he lost?

A, one quarter. B, one sixteenth. C, two eighths. D, one half. What is the only body part which is fully grown from birth? What is the only body part which is fully grown from birth? I got told it before and if it's not true, I'm going to be annoyed. I got told it and I would go into the line to me. I don't think I got told it, but I think I've read it before, but I also don't believe it.

I don't believe it either. My one as well. Everyone lot? Yeah. Question number nine. Is happily an adjective, verb or adverb? Is the word happily an adjective, a verb or an adverb? Question number 10. Somewhat history question. Queen Elizabeth II has four children. Name two of them.

Queen Elizabeth. - Is that the one I just passed? - Yeah, I'll give you a clue. It's the one that just passed. - Thank you. - Oh, okay. - I was gonna tell you. - Who the fuck is that? - I'll give you a clue. - Who the fuck is that? - I'll give you a clue. It's the one I just passed. - Yeah. - Oh, okay. - Has four children. - Four youths. - Name two of them. - Blood seed. - All of you men should be able to do this. Everyone's locked? - Yeah. - Okay. - Are we stopping? - I'm assuming we're stopping. - Swapping boards, please. First question. How many millions in a billion? The correct answer is 1000. Question number two. In which country would you find Machu Picchu?

The correct answer is Peru. Which of these animals is not a mammal? Whale, shark, dolphin or seal? The correct answer is shark. In 1986, Chernobyl was the site of the worst nuclear disaster in history. Which country did this take place? The correct answer is Ukraine. Which of the following are a synonym for defer? Change, respect, postpone or disagree? The correct answer is postpone. In Thailand, 95% of the population are followers of what religion?

The correct answer is Buddhism. - Well played. - Rodney loses half an eighth of his money. How much has he lost? The correct answer is 1/16. What is the only body part, this is one everyone thinks they know. What is the only body part which is fully grown from birth? The correct answer is eyes. - Yes! - Well played, Dennis. - Let's go. - That's on a fucking roll. Is happily an adjective, a verb or an adverb? The correct answer is adverb. - I think we all wrote the same.

- Yeah. - Lastly, Queen Elizabeth has four children, name two of them. The possible answers are Charles, Anne, Andrew or Edward. - I'll say. - Cool, right. Is everyone got everyone's scores? - I let myself down. - All right. So I can say with confidence without any, maybe I would have got it right. I would have got six. - Cool. - Rem got six out of 11. - Well played Rem. - Fouad got six out of 11. - Well played Fouad.

- And I think Ellis won. - Ellis got five out of 11. - Well fucking played though, bro. - I got quite a few. - That's really impressive from you. Good fucking job. - Tiebreaker. - GGs. - Tiebreaker. - Is there a tiebreaker? - What is the definition of rigorous? Lax, loose, relaxed or strict? Rigorous. Lax, loose, relaxed or strict? Ready? Three, two, one. - Strict. - Cool. - D, yeah. - Auspicious.

Find the definition of auspicious, favourable, lowly, poor or threatening. Auspicious, favourable, lowly, poor or threatening. - Lowly, did you say? I was gonna say can you use it in a sentence, but you obviously can't. - Dread, why? - Because I'm assuming there's no example. - I'm not saying that he can't use it in a sentence. - I thought you were gonna say like there's no. - Nah, I'm saying, but the sentence wouldn't help you anyway, because.

All the options are framed in a way that I can use the sentence and use all of that. - Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. - Makes perfect sense. Sorry, can you give me the options again? - Auspicious, favorable, lowly, poor, threatening. - Locked. - Three, two, one. And the answer is favorable. Well done. - Let's go. - Is that what you're doing? - I've lost three sudden deaths. - Let's go.

- Sorry G. - Don't be, it's my fault. - Okay. - GG's. - GG's guys, well played. - GG's indeed. - So, I put his money where his mouth was. Came out on top. One of these days we're gonna have to go toe to toe. I like that. - That's what actually was being mentioned in the Discord term actually, that either myself or Ellis are quiz master and so you two can-- - Caveat, these were not key stage three questions.

Especially the sudden death definitely wasn't, but I'm not sure about... Sudden death, I promise you, was key stage three. I googled key stage three. Fair, fair, fair. Auspicious was being used by... This is a paid advertisement for BetterHelp. Bro. Talk to me. Real quick, ask me what my self-care non-negotiables are. What? Grounding.

Wim Hof breath work. Yeah. Eight hour sleep. Non-negotiables. Those are three perfect non-negotiables. And I'm proud of you. Thank you very much. I'm very, very proud of you. It's like when people say never skip leg day, but it's never skip therapy day. We all know how easy it is for our schedules to become overwhelmed with social gatherings and other obligations that leave us struggling to make time for the things that fill our own cups. 100%. It's like when your schedule is packed with big work projects and more.

It's easy to let your priorities slip. Even when we know what makes us happy, it can be hard to make time for it.

But guys, when you feel like you have no time for yourself, non-negotiables like therapy are more important than ever. Agreed. And therapy has broader benefits like, for example, learning how to set boundaries in your life so that you feel empowered to be the best version of yourself. Exactly that. With almost 5,000 therapists in the UK already, BetterHelp can provide access to mental health professionals with a wide variety of expertise. Never skip therapy day with BetterHelp.

Betterhelp.com slash gigs pod today to get 10% off your first month. That's better help. H E L P.com slash gigs pod. I'm not going to lie. I'm not going to lie that it wasn't there because I remember having that on. I saw that on one of my ones. I didn't know the answer. So I charged it. Yeah. I charged it. Uh,

- Wow. - Yeah. - Fair. - Some of these I don't think were key stage three, but like Chernobyl, how many of these man know about Chernobyl key stage three? 11 to 14. - History. - That's history. - That's one of the biggest historic events. - You said you saw the show yourself. - True. - Yeah man, don't get me wrong, but I didn't watch it when I was 11. - True. - But I've seen the show, yeah. - Fair. - But yeah, anyway. - Cool, all right, so. - That was good, it was fun. - I have a film review. - Ooh, we've not done one of these in ages. - I haven't done one and you man,

Buckle in. Yeah. Because on the flight back from Miami, when I say I watched a fucking movie, you man, this has encouraged me to go back and start watching movies from the 90s. Because it turns out they could just make a movie about anything back then. And it was all good. Okay. So the movie that I watched is called Indecent Proposal, right? Indecent Proposal, you man. So premise. Mm-hmm.

We have, it stars Woody Harrelson, Demi Moore and Robert Redford. Yeah. So Rotten Tomatoes and IMDb are not rating it. When I tell you, man, it's a fucking movie. Yeah. So what happens is, yeah, Woody Harrelson and Demi Moore are married. Woody Harrelson is an aspiring architect. And basically these men have been together since they were like 17. Okay. When I say they're in love, they are in love, bro. They're in love, bro. So-

Woody Harrelson just wants to become a successful architect. That's all he wants to do. And he's dedicated all his time and effort into becoming an architect. Demi Moore is basically just supporting him financially. She's like working two jobs. She's doing whatever she can to support him because she believes in him and his talent and his dream. And all she wants to do is support it. So eventually they save up enough money so that he can build his own yard. And this is going to be his like,

Like we're going to build this yard. It's going to be my first job as an architect. We're going to sell the yard for bags because it's so unique and it's so perfect. And then that's on top. That's where we're going to get money from, from that sale. And on top of that, it's going to get my name out there. So it's going to be patterned. So everything's all blessed, all blessed, all blessed. They start building the house. Everything's calm.

And these men run out of money. And they're behind on their bank payments now for the yard. So they took out a loan to build the yard. They're behind on their bank payments and they're basically fucked. So bank pull them in and be like, bro, you're like three months behind on your payments. Like you've got 30 days to pay up or I promise you this thing is charged. We're taking the yard from you.

And they're like, stop. You can't. You're killing my dream. You don't understand that you can't take it. Because we've put everything into this. And if I can't finish this yard, I promise you we're fucked. And Banks like, that's not my problem, big man. So he's like, all right, cool. Demi's like, I'm fucked. Like, what are we going to do? Woody's like, right, fuck.

I've got five bags. Yeah. This is going to sound crazy, but there's no way. So basically they owe 50K. Yeah. So they've got 30 days to come up with 50K. Yeah. And man's like, that's impossible. Yeah. Like she's working a normal nine to five. He doesn't even have a job. So it's like, how are we getting this 50K? And he's like, we've got no option, but to go to Vegas and just try. Yeah.

Because otherwise it's charged. So they go to Vegas. She's like, whatever. When I say she's a supportive wife. Say less. Supportive, bro. Say less. So they go to Las Vegas. They pull up and they're gambling, gambling, gambling. Gambling, gambling, gambling, gambling. And then they're up. Okay. So their 5K turns to 10. Their 10 turns to 15. 15 turns to 20. And they're like, big man, this is happening. We could make it. This is fucking happening. Okay. 20 turns to 25. This is fucking happening.

So as Woody's gambling, gambling, gambling, Demi's just happy to be along. Gassed, gassed, gassed. So they're in a good mood, bro. They're halfway there. Everything's blessed. She goes shopping now while he's doing his gambling. She goes shopping in one of this fancy store, one designer store, sees this dress. Sexy thing. She's like trying it on and things like that. And then that's where Robert Redford comes in. Plays a character called John Gage. He's a billionaire. He pulls up, he prees her and he's like,

That dress is you. Buy it. You have to buy it. And she's like, I appreciate it, but I can't afford it. He's like...

Just seeing you in that dress was enough for me. It was literally a gift for me. So let me gift that dress to you. I'll buy it for you. And she's like, hey man. Bars. Caviar? This guy spits game. Say less. I can tell. He stays spitting game in this film, bro. He's like, let me buy it for you. She's like, you can't buy me.

Like I'm not for sale. So I didn't gift you shit. So I appreciate it, but pass. He's like, say this. Cool, four Adolfo. Enjoy your evening. She goes back, hubby's 25K up and they're laughing. So they go to bed, everything's best. And they're like, cool, that's day one. Now day two, we make another 25. We're in the clear. They're like, bless. Wake up the next day, have some breakfast. They go, they gamble, loss. 25 goes to 20.

loss 20 goes to 15 loss 15 goes to 10 she's like stop stop stop stop stop we have to stop

Woody's like, there's no points. They want 50 and we've got 10. There's no point stopping. We have to keep going. She's like, fuck. What are they playing by the way? They're playing craps and roulette. They're playing all sorts. So she's like, fuck, fuck, fuck. All right, cool. You're right. We can go to the bank with 10 and they can spit in our face or we can keep gambling. So they go, keep gambling, loss. Keep gambling, loss. Basically they lose the whole thing.

And they're back at square one. Damn. But when I say these men are in love and they support each other, there's no bad blood. They basically say, we came here with nothing. We're leaving with nothing. We tried our best. I guess they're taking the house. That's the end of it. So as they're walking out, they see a crowd of people around a poker table. Everyone's like, what's going on over there? So they go look. They see Mr. Gage. He's dropping 100K a pop every hand. 100K, 100K, 100K.

Billy Bob Thornton is just like a local spectator. He's like, this guy is caked. He's dropping hundreds. Like it's nothing. So he's, but John Gage is losing, losing, 100K losing, 100K losing. Unfazed. Unfazed. Doesn't care. Couldn't care less. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. So he looks over into the crowd, sees Demi Moore and says, oh, homegirl with the dress. So he pulls up, spitting game.

Pulls up to Woody Harrison and says, "Sorry to bother you, bro." It's his mid poker game. Gets up, pulls over and says, "Sorry to bother you, bro. Is this your wife?" Woody's like, "Yeah, well gone." He's like, "Can I be a pain? Like I saw you man yesterday gambling and it looked like your wife was just bringing you good luck. Can I steal her for a minute? Can she just sit with me and watch me play and see if it brings me luck?"

Woody's like random, but go on then. Go ahead. Go on then. So she comes and sits down. She's like, oh my fucking God, this guy. But she hasn't told Woody about the dress situation. The previous thing, yeah. So she's like, oh, this fucking guy. So she sits down like nervous. Like, okay, okay, okay. So sits down and then playing 100K, win, 100K, win. He's like, I told you, you're good luck. She's like, stop, stop, stop. So next he's like, all right, well, let's charge this.

"I see you man playing crabs yesterday. "Let's go over there and roll some dice." She's like, "All right, bet." So they go over, the whole crowd comes over with them. He goes over and he's like, "Cool, let's just play one hand." She's like, "All right, bet." And he calls this boy and he's like, no, he writes a check, that's it. Calls one of the security guards, writes a check and said, "I need this in chips." They go into a secret container, pull out an M, million in chips. Everyone's like, "This guy's taking a piss." Puts it on one play.

He gives her the dice. It says, roll a seven. She's like, stop. He's like, no pressure, man. You're good luck. Roll a seven for me. And then she's like, I can't, I can't, I can't, I can't. He's like, trust me, it's fine. Roll a seven and we're cool. Or an 11 will do as well, but roll a seven. So she goes to roll it. He says, wait, you forgot something. And she's like, what? He's like, when you was playing with Donnie yesterday, wasn't you kissing the dice? She's like, yeah. He's like, kiss the dice for me. She's like, roll. Seven.

- Yeah. - You see how Annie Joshua was when he knocked out Franz Zagano? - Yeah. - Unfazed. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - Everyone's screaming. Demi Moore screaming. - Yeah. - Fuck. John Gage. - Cash. No more day in the office. - I said, man didn't look at the table. Look to her and say, I told you. So, she, yeah, yeah, yeah. She's like, wow. - Yeah. - Wow. - Real man. - Yeah. - That's all I would be thinking if I'm her. Real man. - Yeah. Fuck. Yeah.

Fuck. Yeah. This is what life is. Yeah. So hubby crawling through, broke ass hubby crawling through the crowd. It says, babe, well done. Like fucking hell. I can't believe it. Just running like mills. So he turns to the husband respectfully and says, bro, thank you so much. I appreciate you lending me your wife. Pick any suite in this hotel. I'm going to patent it for you tonight. Anything you want to eat, I'm going to patent it for you. Anything you want to shop, patent it for you.

Tonight you're my guest whatever you want and then he's like right-hand man's like I'll take care of you puts him in like a six-week everything like that So they're chilling chilling chilling like wow that was cool. But obviously we're depressed cuz we lost all our money Yeah, yeah, then we hear a little on the door. Mm-hmm. They open the door and it's John Gage's right-hand man. Yeah with a present Yeah, he pops in and says are as a thank you. Mr Gage just wants to invite you to a party's having upstairs and he's bought you a little present and

So it's Woody that opened the door and said, oh, right. Thanks. Thanks. Thanks. So he comes in and said, ah, present. That's weird. She's like, cool. Open it. Where's it? Open it. Black dress. Yeah. And then he pulls out. He says, oh, this is a nice dress. He bought you this dress. And she's like, that dress is three grand. He's like, how do you know it's three grand? She was like, oh, I was, I was looked at in a shop the other day. And he's like, how did he know your size? And she's just like, I don't know. I don't know if he knows my size. Hmm.

So she slips into the little black number. They head upstairs, party, party, party. And John just chirps in the husband, just like, "Call to me what you do." He's not paying attention to the wife. - Ignoring the wife. - Ignoring the wife. - Yeah, yeah, yeah. - This nigga's got game, bro. - Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. - He knows how to sink his teeth in. - Yeah. - Yeah, yeah. - One poor red dresser didn't even look at her. - Yeah, yeah.

- I'm listening. - Churps and husband, churps and husband. And then every now and again, I leave them to go get a drink, to dance, all that thing. But when they're dancing, when they're drinking, he's looking at them and he's just admiring. So end of the night, crowd starts to dissipate. They're just playing pool together and have a conversation. And then John's like, so Woody's asking John like, "Bro, this is amazing life you lived. What do you do? What's this? What's that?" And he's like, "Oh, bro, I just own businesses and that's what I do." And he's like, "You know what? Yeah, one thing I will say about you lot

Since meeting you, I can tell just from looking at you, like I own businesses, I have all this money, I have everything, but like, I don't have what you lot have. So they're holding hands and they're kissing. They're like, yeah, we've been doing this. Like we love each other. So I can tell, I can tell. And like, it's just like, I'll never, I'll never have what you have. And then they're like, yeah, well you can't buy everything in it. Like money doesn't solve everything. Money doesn't solve everything. And then like, he's like, swear. Yeah.

Yeah, he says, what makes you say that? He's like, well, you can't buy love, can you? He's like, is it? He's like, all right. Hypothetically speaking, if I wanted to buy some love and I offered you a million dollars right now to have your wife for the night, what would you say? Is his wife right there? She's standing right there. She jumps in his eye. He'd say no. And Woody's like, yeah, I'll say no. And he was like, cool.

But would you say no because she said you'd say no? Or would you actually say no? Of course I'd say no. It's like, bet. But are you saying no because it's a hypothetical situation? If there was really a million dollars here right now, would you be saying no? He's like, I think so. And he's like, cool. Well, there's a million dollars on the table right now. What are you saying? One night.

awkward silence. - I bet. - Yeah, and they're like, bro, you're taking- - 'Cause they're in a pickle. - Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. A pickle. They're like, bro, I'm not being rude, like fuck off. Like you're taking a piss now. He's like, all right, say less. Just thought I'd ask. Interesting conversation. Anyway, I've got places to be. You might enjoy yourself. Stay here, have a drink, enjoy the sweet. - He's a character. - Yeah! - He's a character. - Unfazed by everything. Cool, I'm a dip. Enjoy. It was nice to meet you. So they go back to the room

Brush it off. Fast forward time now. It's 3 a.m. When I say, they're mad like this. In bed. Both of them wide awake. Turn to each other. You can't sleep. You can't sleep. Can't sleep, bro.

And they're like, oh, he's a dickhead for saying that, innit? Why is he offering his stuff? I'm like, bro, fuck knows. He's a dickhead. And they're like, pfft, smart. And they're like, pfft, it's crazy. Obviously would never do it, but, you know, a million. It could be sick. Yeah, a million. It could be sick, yeah. And she's like, yeah, well, it's butters, but it's just sex, innit? Who's saying that? She's saying this. She said, at the end of the day, I fucked other people, you fucked other people, and we love each other. If you wanted me to do it, I would do it.

He's like, stop being stupid, stop being stupid. She's like, obviously I don't want to do it. I would never want to do it. But like, if you wanted me to do it and you could promise me that would be cool, I promise you I'd do it hypothetically. And he's like, nah, nah. He's like, but that yard, the yard's fucked. The yard is fucked and she's a supportive wife. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. And he's like, obviously we're not doing it. Not gonna lie, need the 50K. Yeah. Back to square one, we need the 50K. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So chit chat, chit chat, chit chat. Cutscene, we're doing it.

"Cool, get my lawyer to write up a contract. "We're doing it. "Don't chat to me. "I hate you for even doing this. "Run me my mill, take the wife, la, la, la, la, la. "Don't wanna hear about it." So he's like, "Bet." So he signs the contract. They're like, "Cool." They set up a date in a few weeks. Everything's cool. She's vexed. So they pull up to his hotel room. She walks in.

And she's like, husband's like, fuck, fuck, fuck. Cool. So he goes down to the casino, gets a few drinks, like clear my head, clear my head, clear my head. Don't think about it. Don't think about it. So it happens then and they get the money in a few weeks? Or the ting happens in a few weeks? They take some time. Okay. They don't give exact numbers of when it is. Okay. But some time has passed. Okay. They make the deal. I don't know how much time passed from when they decided to when they actually see him to when the money gets transferred. Everything, everything, everything. So they pull up.

It was definitely a few weeks. It was definitely some time had passed and they pull up to him and they're like, all right, fuck it. Take my wife, whatever. I'm going to go see in a bit. He's getting drunk, chatting with his boy, trying to de-stress. She pulls in aggressive ting. Like, so what? Should I get my gums off? What do you want me to do? Close off? How are we doing this? He's like, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. Chill, chill, chill, chill, chill, chill, chill, chill, chill, chill, chill, chill, chill.

let's not be hasty. Yeah. Like, and she's like, well, you're here to fuck me, aren't you? So just fuck me. Like, let's get it over with. He's like, calm down. Like, let's go upstairs. Where are they at the moment? In his hotel room. Okay. So she's like, upstairs. He's like, yeah, we're gonna, we're gonna go upstairs. They go upstairs, cuts to the husband. Husband's like, he's bopping, bopping, bopping. And he's like,

What the fuck am I doing? What the fuck am I doing? Sprints upstairs. Bang, bang, bang, bang, bang, bang, bang. No one's answering. Bang, bang, bang, bang, bang, bang. No one's answering. Kicks down the door. Bro, bro, bro. There's a maid in there. He's like, where the fuck is my wife? Where the fuck is... He's calling her. Why, why, why, why, why? Where is she? Where is she? Where is she? Wife's like, they went upstairs. He's like, what do you mean upstairs? She's like, helicopter. Sprints to the roof. Helicopter. Sprints to the roof. Says, babe. Babe, don't do it. She's already gone. What?

She zoomed off into the skyline. - Sunset. - Exactly sunset. They land on a yacht in the middle of the ocean and it is sunset. They land, he tells her, "There's a room for you in there, go get changed." He's got her in some little Japanese number, hair tied up, chopsticks in, red lippy on. - What's them thing called? - Geisha. - Geisha. - Oh yeah, one of them things. Yeah, she pulls out and she's just like, "Big man, let's just please, let's just get over with it. I'm not on it." He's like, "Listen to me."

I know what the agreement says and what the contract says. Nothing's going to happen tonight that you don't want to happen. Fam, few drinks, leans in, leans out. I say lips. They lips. Cut scene. Next scene is Donnie in the room like... Woody. Woody in the room like... Hasn't slept, crying his eyes out. She pulls in. She's like, don't talk about it. We agreed we're not going to talk about it. The money's secured.

let's just get on with our lives. He's like, cool, I'm just happy to have you home. Like fuck that whole experience. Happy to have you home. I'm not gonna ask about it. Don't wanna talk about it. - She can't stop thinking about it. - Huh? The money gets transferred. They go to the bank. Cool, cool, cool. Let's buy a house out. Bank's like, big man, where you man been? I've been bailing you, sending you letters. Ting's gone.

We warned you, bro. We fucking warned you. They're like, stop instantly, stop instantly. We've got bags for you. If you want 50, it's 50. If you want 100, it's 100. Tell me what the number is. It's like, bro, we already told someone else. The yard is gone. Your dream is gone. Enjoy your little piece of money. This situation is charged. Good luck. So now they're thinking, what did we even do this for? What did we even do this for, big man? Bro. So they pull up, go home, and they're just a bit down, stressed, everything. Now Woody's thinking...

are you thinking about my man? Do you ever think about my man? She's like, big man, stop. Stop. Don't do this. Don't do, you promised me you wouldn't do this. He's like, no, I just want to know, like, what was it saying? She's like, I promise you I'm not answering that question. Cool, cool, cool, cool, cool, cool. She's on the phone. Like next day, she's on the phone to her mom. He's like, oh no, you're on the phone too. My mom, cool, swear. Tell her I said hello then. She's like, bro, she's gone. Like, what are you doing?

He's like, cool, cool, cool. Nevermind, nevermind, nevermind. Sees her purse, goes for her purse. Opens the purse, finds Donnie's business card in there. And he's like, enough is enough. Runs down, he's like, what the fuck is this? She's like, what do you mean?

why the fuck have you got his card in your purse bro I didn't even know it was in there like he obviously gave it to me I just put it in my purse and didn't think about it again she's like you're chatting he's like you're chatting shit bro you obviously you've been chatting to him you wanna link him you wanna like fuck him again you wanna see him and she's like bro it's like stop literally fucking stop yeah like you have to stop he's like you have to tell me you have to fucking tell me what happened he's like bro I'm not telling you what happened he's like

"Did you fuck him?" She said, "Is the money in the bank?" "Yeah." Then I fucked him. "What'd you think?" Like, "Let's move on." - Yeah. - Like, "Stop, bro." He's like, "Was it good? Just tell me if it was good." She was like, "You have to stop this." He's like, "You have to tell me right now if it's good, otherwise I promise you I'm never sleeping again."

She's like, yeah, it was good, bro. That's it. It was just sex. It was good. End of, done. And he's like, oh, I'm going to kill myself. I'm going to kill myself. This whole thing is charged. Fuck you, you slag. You fucking dickhead. Fuck all of this, bro. Go be with him if you love him so much. And she's like, wow. It causes so much drama, bro, that they fucking separate. They separate, bro. Neither of them can handle it anymore. Damn, man. As soon as they separate, Mr. Gage, I can't stop thinking about you.

It's like, ever since the yacht, Demi, I'm not gonna lie to you. I can't stop thinking about you. I need you. She's like, bro, you just love to collect shit. Not one of your collectible items. Like, fuck off. Like, you've ruined my life. Get the fuck away from me. He's like, cool. Again, unfazed. Cool. A few weeks go by. Cool. And she works as a estate agent. Okay. So he pulls up to her work, says to the boss. The irony. Losing the house. Facts.

Says to her boss, he pulls up and he's like, "I wanna view some $10 million homes." So the boss says, "Cool, Demi, show Donny some $10 million homes." She looks, sees who it is. She's like, "You can go fuck yourself, I ain't showing him nothing." He says, "Celes, I promise you now you're sacked unless you show this guy some homes." Like, do you know how much commission is on a 10 million home?

Go out there now. I've always just sat. So she's like fuck sake. So she takes him out this house Yeah, kitchen bathroom. Next John's like chill chill chill chill chill chill. He's like cool. Fuck you next house bathroom kitchen three bed this garden next He's like chill chill chill chill chill chill chill. So they're driving driving driving. They see a massive yacht and he's like That's the one I want. How much do you think that is? She's like, bro, that's like 40 50 mil easily

And he's like, "Let's go pre it." She's like, "Do you see a for sale sign?" He's like, "Pigman, I thought you knew this. Everything's for sale." You're still not learning, are you? You're still not learning shit. Everything's for sale. She's like, "Fair." You literally knighted me, fair. - I would be, if I'm Demi, I'm wetting up the seat. Wetting up the seat. - He's like, "Shut up and show me the yard, man." So they're walking around the yard and she's like, "Fucking hell, this is a yard."

Pull him, pull him, pull him. And so they're looking around and he's like, what do you think of it? She was like, it's gorgeous. He said, what do you think is missing? She looked and she was like, this is your yard, innit? He's like, guilty as charged. What do you think is missing? She was like, I don't fucking know. He's like, it's missing you. It's gonna be your yard, you know? Whatever you want. This is yours. Like, what are you saying?

She's like, literally stop. You're doing too much. Like stop. He's like, big man, I told you, I want you. I can't stop thinking about you. It's been a minute. Do you think you're the only gal I get? I can't stop thinking about you, bro. Please. She's like, fuck sake, man. Like whatever. And obviously she's been separated from Donnie now for a minute. So she's like, all right, take me on a date then, innit? If that's what you want to do, take me on a date. Bro, takes her on a date. They start linking. They're locked in.

So now she sent Woody divorce papers. She's like, we're gonna have to divorce then, innit? 'Cause I'm with my man now. Woody's losing his mind. - I bet. - Losing his mind. And he's thinking, all my fears have been realized. Soon as we broke up, she's gone with him. Cool. Then, so she said in the divorce papers, take the whole meal. I don't want it. - Yeah. - Don't need it. - Yeah. - Take the whole meal. I want you to have it.

He says that, cool. One day, now these man, Demi and John Gage are happily locked in a relationship, everything. She loves animals in it. So we're at an auction where you can adopt animals. Her favorite animal is a hippo. So they're at the thing.

And in the auction, everyone's like, oh, John Cage is here. John Cage is here. He's putting down auction things like, yeah, bid on this, bid on that. Hippo comes up. She's like, oh my fucking God, I love hippos. He's like, pattern you. He's like, 30K for a hippo. Another lady, 50K for the hippo. He's like, 100K for the hippo. Hear a voice in the back. One mil for the hippo. Yeah, yeah. You want to talk wet pussy? One mil for the hippo. Everyone, huh?

"Woody, hold on." She's like, "What are you doing, man?" Like, I gave you that money for a reason. He's like, "Big man, take your hippo, innit? "I don't want the money." - I want you. - Yeah, I want you. John Gage says, again, unfazed, "I'll give you man a minute, innit? "I'm gonna step over to the side, "I'm gonna give you man a minute." Tosa, babe, I miss you. I can't believe we let this dickhead get between us. I miss you. - This is what my man's saying. "Woody, I miss you. "I hate what happened, but obviously I see you're happy. "Do your thing, enjoy your hippo, innit?"

So she's like, so John now has clocked it. And he's thinking, I was actually right. Like after everything that's happened, I'm trying to buy, buy, buy, buy, buy, buy, buy. Donnie has still managed to pull up and swindle my girl. Even though I managed to get her in the end, I still never managed to get what they had. Even when I had her bro, I didn't have what they had. And he was like, cool.

I know she's not going to leave me though because her life is patterned and everything's blessed. I mean, her cool. So I know she's not going to leave me. So I need, I need to make her leave me because I'm not leaving her. So one day they're chilling in the car. Everything's blessed. And he's like, I love you. You know, babe. She's like, cool. Yeah. I love you too. He's like, nah, I actually love you. Love you. Love you. She was like, yeah, I love you too. He says to his driver, bro, have you ever seen me this happy? Driver's like, nah, bro. I never seen you this happy. He's like, yeah, she's the best. Isn't it? He's like, yeah, she's the best. He says, yeah,

"Do you think she's the best out of all of them?" Driver's like, "What?" He's like, "Do you think she's the best out of all of them?" And the driver has to play along and it's like, "Yeah, yeah, best out of all of them." She's like, "Best out of all of them? All of who?" And he's like, "Who do you think? My million pound things. My million things. You're the best out of them." She's like, "Million pound things?" He's like, "Oh, you thought you were the only thing I'm paying for? That's mad. Nah, you're like," He's like, "Driver, how many do you think?" He's like, "I don't know."

10, 20 He's like And he starts making up stuff Do you remember the one Who wouldn't stop hiccuping When she's laughing and stuff And then laughing about it Laughing He's like no no no But you're the best You're the best by far And she's like Wow And he's like Wow You're just another one Damn Yeah And she's like Pull the car over big man Pull the car over big man I'm getting out And he's like Say less Yeah yeah Cars pulled Yeah So she gets out

Just about to leave. She's clocked what he's done. Gives him a kiss on the cheek, dips. Driver's like, what the fuck are you doing, big man? He's like, bro, so it's like you can't buy everything. I tried my best. And then he, fam, again, unfazed. Gets in a whip system. Let's go. On to the next. I've got, there's money to be made. Let's go. When I say John Gage is the MVP of the 90s, as fictional characters go, John Gage is my spirit animal.

- Fuck. - Yeah, fam, it's a movie. - Obviously as you were saying it, I was envisioning everything. So I feel like I've seen the movie, but I'm gonna be equally as gassed when I watch the movie. - Bro. - Wow. - I rarely spoil a movie from beginning to end. - Yeah, yeah. - That, huh, I was locked in. - Wow.

Wow. It ended just as the plane was landing as well. Fucking hell, I was locked in. John Gage, my bro? Wow. Say less. Human being. Say less. He does look like a Playboy philanthropist anyway, to be fair. He does. He does. Billionaire Playboy, bro.

- Yeah. - That's who Tony Starks thinks he is. - Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. - Fair play. - Bro, it was a good movie. - Good recommendation. Good storytelling as well, man. I was locked in. - Bro. - I was locked in. - Very good. Very fucking good. - Well played, man. - All right guys, bit of a different episode, but thank you very much. As always catch us on Thursday, patreon.com/shittinggigs, three pound a month. - 10p a day, S and G. - And yeah, love, love, love. - Go, go, go.

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To save power, I'm going to talk super fast to finish before a flex alert starts. All we have to do is use less power during a flex alert to help keep the lights on. I can't stop talking this fast. Why not? I unplug the fridge and drink all the iced coffee. Nobody needs to unplug the fridge. Okay, okay, okay. Or drink two gallons of iced coffee. The power is ours with flex alerts.