"Danny McBride"
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Hello, welcome to Smartless. I'm Dane McBride, and I've been a fan of this podcast for quite some time. From listening to it multiple times, I've decided there are a few things that we could do to improve this show. One is fire the three fucking hosts and put me in instead. So I've done that. Welcome to Smartless. Smart. Less. More.

How's everybody doing? I haven't seen you guys in a long time.

-Bye. -It feels like-- -Well, I saw you last week. -Oh, yeah, you saw me last week. No, but I mean, like, a week goes by. -It's a long-- It feels like a long time. -I know. I know. Uh, Sean, you woke me up this morning. You told me I'd be late for work. -That is true. -And you worried me out of bed, so-- That is also true. But you didn't return the text. But, uh, Will, we went out to dinner, and, um... Yeah. ...at the end, which was so embarrassing, Will ordered-- told the wait staff that it was my birthday. That was embarrassing.

Everybody. It was in New York. New York. And we, at the end, they said, is it any, you know, and I go, yeah, it's Sean's birthday. And so they brought out a piece of cake with candles. Yeah. It's not his birthday. It's so boring. It is an old trick that always works. It's a fun one. Speaking of birthdays, we have an announcement of a really exciting new thing that we want to talk about.

Right, so, and that exciting new thing, Sean, is our new podcast. Oh, yes, with Rex Chapman. Yes, it's called Owned with Rex Chapman. Yes, oh, good. So we're going to be chatting with him really briefly. Stick around at the end. At the end, normally when you're like, I'm out of here, fuck those guys, stick around. Yeah, no, save a little bit for the dessert. Yeah, save a little room. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Hey, I don't know when this is going to air, but something came to mind. We'll probably be tied into the presidential campaign as soon as you see our next guest.

Okay. I mean, he just had an announcement yesterday on Twitter that didn't go well, but today we're going to give old Ronnie D a nice launch right now. I don't usually declare who my guest is before him, but fuck along. How did we get old Ivy League Ron DeSantis in here? I love these guys. They're all like...

The elite, the elite in every single one of these guys are like double degrees from Ivy League colleges. Ted Cruz. Right. All these guys are such clowns. I know. Anybody else got anything else or can we get to Ron? I got a couple things, but if you want to get on with it. No, go ahead. Let's hear your material. I can watch Sean opening stuff on his desktop right now. I can't.

No, I wanted to say. What are the things? Cold open ideas. No. Let's hear it. When Will and I were at dinner, I wanted to show him. Was the waitstaff still around the table? Oh, fuck. Ron's got a beer. That's a good cold one, hey, Ron? Yeah, just getting thirsty waiting. We'll be right with you, Mr. D. We were at dinner, and I said I wanted to show Will something on Instagram. So I hit search.

And when I hit search, all that came up were guys who were bears and dogs. Wait, what's a dog? It's like a domesticated animal that people have in their home. I thought that was a description of a different type of... Like gay bears and dogs. No. Jay, it was unbelievable.

Unbelievable. And it was just all like big burly dudes in tight jean shorts with hairy chests. Does Scotty know that you still have an active search going for bears? Because if you touch one, like if you click on one thing, the algorithm thinks, oh, well, you must want to see everything. It's like, no. Yeah, but you've been with Scotty, a very cute bear, for years. 17 years, yeah. Okay, so why is there still a recent search for bears?

fucking hot and available bears on your cool. Wait a minute. Are you honestly asking me, like, you don't look at pictures of, I don't know, big-breasted whatever? Buddy, no. I do not. And I'm actually embarrassed to say that I have a non-existent relationship to porn. I'm a

It's very odd. Well, the other one of the three-some is silent. I'm letting everybody else bury themselves in comments that we'll either cut or they'll regret. Now, hang on a second. No, Will, you're not clean on this at all. No, no. It's like I don't either. I clicked like one, one time, and then the algorithm sends you 10,000 things. So it's like I get 10,000 puppy pictures. This is on Instagram. It's not porn. So this is Instagram that he's looking at photographs of things that he liked. Got it. Photograph. My bad. Photograph.

Sure. So if the image is moving, then that's pornography? If it's just a still? Yeah, well, it's definitely different. But before you make me sound like I'm some kind of a monster, Will, wouldn't you agree that... How did I make... I'm not saying you're a monster. Well, we're talking about porn and people's, you know, frequency. Yeah. Now, on my child's life, I can't remember the last time I looked at pornography. Can you say the same thing?

I can. I'm not a big porn guy. Right. But you're an average male. I never have been. It's something that's part of the male thing for some weird... Every single human being. I know. I know. But for some reason, that switch is just off. But here's the thing. I don't have a problem with people... Well, first of all, you have to be an adult. I think this is an important distinction that needs to be made. And I think that porn has really fucked with people's perception of what...

Yes, sex is. Sex is. 100%. Yeah, when kids are looking at it. But I looked at it when I was a kid, and I didn't think that every sex session is like— No, but it was different back then. I was just having this conversation because I've had this conversation with my kids and with the older kids because— They can find anything. Well, because the Internet is so readily available. And I'm not kidding when I say I sat them down and I said, guys, here's the deal.

It's going to be, it's... You might see me in one or two of them. Right. Yeah. As much as your mom and I, you know, monitor and look at what you guys look at online, which we do with a fair bit of frequency. We look at stuff. We have, part of the deal with them having devices is we get to look at messages whenever we want and get to look at what they're looking at.

And that's just, and it's just the way it is. And so they know that. You gave them some of the good sites. Is that what you gave them? Yeah. And so I made sure to tell them that like, look, there's going to be moments where we can't, there's nothing I can do about it. And you're going to have access to this stuff. And you need to know that it is not a good representation of what,

you know, what sex is, et cetera, et cetera, et cetera, for all the pitfalls of... Right. And...

You know, it was awkward. I mean, it was a tough conversation, but I felt like I had to do it. And of course, like any other human, of course I've seen pornography. It's just not a, porn's not a big part of my experience. It's just not my thing. But it's part of it. So we got it. There we go. No. Not a big one, but part of it. Let's move on to Ron DeSantis. Guys. Okay, here we go. This guy, it's not really, it's not really.

Oh, John. He's one of my favorite actors. Okay. He's one of my favorite writers. Okay. He's been in some of my favorite films and television shows, and some of them he even co-created or fully created himself. Wow. Doesn't live in Hollywood, so cool it on the Coastal Elite bonding session. Right. Yeah.

You're going to have to meet him where he is, fellas, which is right there at the top of Mount Funny. He's the king of cool, the mayor of Laughland, and definitely the guy you most like to work with next. Aren't my intros the best? He's married to a Gia, and they've created an Ava and a Declan. Please welcome George's own Mr. Daniel Richard McBride. Danny! It's me, Ron DeSantis. Hey, buddy, good luck.

Oh, my God. Now, what can did you pop? Was that a beer? It couldn't be further from a beer. It's a pineapple Waterloo. Oh, boy. You could drink a beer because you're East Coast right now, right? So you could have a lunch beer. Yeah, it's after 12. It's 1243. So that's technically okay. That's within the realm of possibility. And we're in North Carolina? Yeah.

I am in South Carolina. I'm in Charleston, South Carolina. I love me some Charleston, South Carolina. You look like you got a handsome house out there in South Carolina. Look at that background. Nice depth down that hallway. What is happening, Danny McBride? What's up, man? Thank you all for having me on here. This is incredible. Thank you for doing it. First of all, Alien Covenant. One of my favorite movies of all time. Let's start there. Go ahead, Sean. I love it. I can't believe I've never met you. I'm a huge fan.

He's not out here. He's hiding in Charleston, keeping it cool, keeping it real. But in all the Halloween movies that you wrote, I'm like a massive, massive fan. Oh, thank you so much. That's amazing. Danny, the first time I saw you was in Foot Fist Way, and it blew me the F away.

still holds up. Such a funny motherfucking movie. Have you shown Archie and Abel that film? No. I need to show Fran and Maple that. I just saw Jody recently. Did he tell you that? Jody Hill. Jody Hill. And we worked together briefly on this commercial a couple months ago. I told him to say hello. I bet you he didn't. He kept that for himself. You know, he doesn't want my head to get too greedy. Yeah. Okay.

I told him to say hi to you. But we were talking about Foot Fist Way, and I loved that movie so much. And I wish you could tell us a little bit about how that came about. Yeah, listener, do yourself a favor and check that out. I'm sorry, I haven't seen it. Oh, Sean, you're going to fucking love it. Walk us through it, Danny. It was one of the first things that I ever did. Jody and myself went to film school together back in North Carolina. Yeah.

And we were living out in Los Angeles for a few years. He was like working on the writing staff of like Road Rules. I was doing this. Road Rules. I used to watch that. He had the best job out of all of us. They had a writing staff on Road Rules. Oh, yeah. Somebody's got to put all that together. Sure. He was doing it. That's amazing. And I was a cameraman at the time. I was out there like.

doing this thing called motion control that now it's been replaced by computers. But you know those Ken Burns documentaries where there's photographs and it like pushes in and pulls out? That used to be done by hand, my hand. And so I used to do Behind the Music, History Channel, Dogtown and Z-Boys, that documentary. I worked on all of that stuff.

But it wasn't what we had come out to L.A. to do, to film still photographs. Yeah, that wasn't your goal to go and shoot photographs? Still photographs, yeah. Why not? Camera on a slider on a lock-off and just push it. Wow. I didn't get it, Danny. Can you get a little slower, please? Got it. That is what it was every day.

Easier than working with actors, huh? Yeah, so Jodi and I were out there for a few years in Los Angeles. And yeah, we wrote that script together and then went back to North Carolina and shot it for like 70 grand. Wow. It got into like the midnight screenings at Sundance. And then, yeah, Will Ferrell and Adam McKay saw it. And then they picked it up and then basically just like changed all of our lives. Like, you know, within months of that being at Sundance, yeah.

uh we sold eastbound and down we had you know gotten to like will i worked with you on hot rod that was the very first real paycheck i got was that uh and then jason i think i saw you in the audience at tropic thunder right didn't i cross paths with you there yes sir yeah and we uh and we we weren't in the scene together and up in the air but we're both in that film yes right yes um

I auditioned for that same part, Jason. Seriously, I really did. In Up in the Air? Yeah. No way. For Jason's part? Yeah. That's so funny. Is this the first time you're revealing this? Yes. I think so. I've never heard that before. Let's just see how different the character would be. Jake, do the line, and then Sean, let's see your... Okay. Go ahead. Jake, do you remember any dialogue? George, we're going to have to let you go.

George, we're going to have to let you go. Okay, so now I'm kind of seeing the difference. Right? It's a different take for sure. It's a whole different thing. It's a different movie. It was a comedy when Sean read for it. It's a different movie. Yeah, they switch genres. All right, now, so Danny. Jesus.

First of all, listener, Foot Fist Way, if you like films about a wily dojo owner, get in there and watch that. Well, my buddy Eli...

When we were working together, Eli was a friend of the podcast, and we were working with Jody. Eli kept going off about Foot Foot Sway because he kept saying, I just love mall karate so much. And Eli's like, I just grew up in Halifax. We had mall karate. I grew up on mall karate. He wouldn't stop saying mall karate. But that movie was really such a testament to a couple of dudes who were really talented who were like, you know what?

This is, by the way, kind of like pre-what, and I hate the term content, but pre-sort of content, pre-people making YouTube videos and having access to do whatever the fuck they want. You guys actually made a movie. You didn't just make like a 30-second video where you say something snarky or dumb.

You actually wrote a movie and did it, which I... And it wasn't... Yeah, and it was kind of a high wire act because... Fuck yeah. No one's asking for a laugh in that movie. You're playing a guy who's real tough to like on paper. So committed. So committed. Yeah, you just never winked once and it started this sort of... You own this...

this ability to be just repulsive, but incredibly likable. And people give you a pass. Like, do you have any idea what that secret sauce is of being a lovable dick? I have no clue. Oh, good. It was for Danny. Shit. I'm so glad the question was for Danny. Yeah.

You know, I don't know. I think with all this stuff that we've kind of mined, whether it's like Foot Fist Way or even Eastbound, I think it's just the fact that we just try to make sure that the character is, you know, feels real and has dimensions so that like you're it's not just throwing out dickish behavior for dickish behavior, but there's underneath of it. You can kind of see some dimension and maybe understand a little bit where it's coming from. You know, there's more to digest. Yeah.

He's usually lovingly ignorant or uneducated or something that kind of allows for it, right? It's not – you're not being hateful. Well, I think that probably – I don't know. Danny, correct me if I'm wrong or if you disagree with this, but I think that there is that notion of – like I said before, when you're so committed to the character, as long as you stay committed to it and like you say –

And you can't ever... People accuse me all the time of playing assholes. I'm like, I don't see them as assholes. I see them as pretty flawed. Naive or whatever. Yeah, they're just flawed in their sense of what... Their sense of reality is different from other people's, but they're committed to it 100%. And they're broken. And I think there's a similarity there. I think that you tap into that. These are characters that are...

Like, yeah, he's not just being a dick. He's a dick in this moment because shit happened to him that made him act this. And there's a necessary dumbness there, right? Because if you were smarter, you'd be nicer. Yes, right. In all these characters, right? Yeah, you'd fake it. You know, and some of it just comes from, too, when we were writing...

We would try to write scripts where the protagonist was friendly or had noble instincts. And it always would just take the script down so predictable paths. And then when you start aligning the movie behind what would typically be the bad guy in the story, it just suddenly becomes more interesting. There's more to do. And you confuse the fuck out of the audience too when they're not sure what's going on.

Like, if you should be... If you're, like, should be celebrating this person or, like, you know, what you're trying to do. Yeah. Now, what about when... Have you written despicable characters and given them to other people to play and just, like...

What is that process like for you? Where, because so much of what you write is dependent on how you perform it to make that, that combination palatable, right? So how do you enjoy that process of giving it over to someone else?

I think it's pretty fun. I mean, like what we'll do even on like, you know, the Righteous Gemstones, which, you know, that new season is coming out here very soon. June 18th. June 18th. June 18th, Righteous Gemstones. Max. Max.

I think sometimes, you know, with that, a lot of characters in that are unsavory. And I think it's like, we'll try to find the comedy in the behavior as opposed to like a punchline so that like the actor can really get their head around behavior where like the delivery of a specific line is open to interpretation. But it kind of feels like when we really get in there with bringing anybody into our circle, if the behavior makes sense, then I feel like a lot of people can

Is that where you think people go wrong the most, is getting that backwards? I think so. I think sometimes you try to be shocking with what a character says, but I think to try to figure out what a character does and make that more shocking is kind of more interesting. You know what I always find? When you write characters like that and you work on things where on the page they seem super unlikable, we used to talk about this all the time when we were making Rest of Development, which is...

the writers would do a really amazing job of making these characters despicable and funny, but it was always our job to try to make them likable, to kind of counteract that. And that's-- And if you looked at it on the page, you'd be like, "Fuck, what? There's nothing-- This character sucks. Like, this guy's a total dick." And you-- And I've noticed in other things that I've worked on, something I just wrote recently where you're like,

Trust me, I know that on the page it looks like X. It's going to be Y. But if you just read it in a vacuum, right? And I imagine on Gemstones it must be like that. If you read a bunch of those scripts, you'd be like, what the fuck, man? These guys are dicks. But it's also so reliant on like you got Adam Devine and John Goodman in there who really know exactly what we're talking about, how to do it so well, play these deeply flawed, broken people, right?

that end up being, you know, really lovable. Danny, let me ask you this, because I've mentioned this a few times, and I think that you're starting to fall in, I think you're already in this category. I maintain that John Goodman has...

has never turned into bad performance in his life and he's been in some bad movies sure everybody has he's never turned into bad performance ever he's he hasn't he's he's awesome and i i mean we're always like blown away that we get to work with him but yeah you know you just look back and i mean he was making tv shows you know when tv wasn't even cool and he was still able to show up in the coen brothers and remember him remember him in revenge of the nerds yes amazing yeah

Wow, really? Dude, Revenge of the Nerds, he's the coach, and he goes, you got beat, and he takes his hat off, and he goes, by a bunch of nerds. And it's one of the funniest, to me, it's one of the funniest readings of a line of all time because he's talking about nerds. So mad that he takes his hat off and throws it. That's really funny. And we will be right back. And now, back to the show.

So, Danny, without revealing any names, was there a super duper dick that you grew up with that's just like made you laugh or that you kind of model some of this brand of humor? Or revealing names. Or you can reveal names. You know, I don't think it was anyone in particular, but, you know, Jody grew up in North Carolina. I grew up in Virginia. And both of us like went to – met at film school and an art school. And so I think we were both these kind of guys that grew up in the South, but –

didn't necessarily like kind of fit the mold of like what a lot of our neighbors were about. And we would kind of find humor in it instead of like participating. And so I think once we got to school, we just sort of like just swapped stories. And, you know, Jody worked at a Taekwondo studio. I took Ishinru karate. And we like our senseis were basically like the same person when we would kind of describe the weird shit that he was going through. And

We just had a lot of, I think, there was a lot of crossover in the type of people he grew up around. And so then we just. And for Tracy, Jody is. Jody Hill. Jody Hill, who wrote, created Eastbound with you, right? Yes. Yeah. Writer as well. Yeah. Well, you brought up an interesting point. Just if I could for one second, Danny. So you grew up in the South and that you were interested in stuff that was maybe different from what your neighbors, which is a really great way to put it.

it. But what was that experience like as two guys who are comedians and who are, as you say, don't necessarily fit that mold? What was that experience like? Sort of, did you feel like a

like an outsider in your own home sometimes? Or did you... You know, when I was a kid, I don't think I realized it as much. It was sort of like when my friends were like starting to settle down or stay in the town that I grew up in. And you're like, oh, you're becoming that guy now. Or you're that fella in the town. I think when we were kids...

you would just kind of gravitate towards who kind of, you know, I just was like so into movies and TV that I just sat my ass on the couch a lot of times, just like watching rented movies and watching HBO through a scrambled signal on the TV. - Right. - Wow. - Well, there's a boob. - I was a nerd. - There's a boob.

I did, exactly. Were you? I was. Like, I was just so in, like, I was, like, making movies on, like, a home video camera when I was, like, in fifth grade. And, you know, I used to, we didn't have cable, but I would, like, sit there and I recorded, I remember, just the audio of Mr. Mom when it came on HBO. We didn't have it. And then I would ride around the neighborhood on my bike in a Walkman, like, listening to Mr. Mom. Oh, wow.

Really? No way. That's wild. Wait, why am I blanking on Mr. Mom? Mr. Mom's an all-time great. Michael Keaton. Michael Keaton. It is an unbelievably great movie. Yeah, great movie. He was the stay-at-home. What was the name of the movie that he did where he went over to Japan and worked in an auto? Gung Ho. Gung Ho. No, they came over here.

Yeah, that's right. Sorry, didn't see that one either. Wait, Danny, do you ever like... I do a Michael Keaton. It's the only impression I do. I love Michael Keaton. I just ran into him the other day. Yeah, me too. Do it. I'm always like, wait, you guys came over here to...

To buy a car company? Listener, the face is doing it. It's not the voice, it's the face. The face is doing a lot of the work. Do you ever write something, finish it, give it to an actor, and then go, God damn it, I wish I would have kept that part for myself?

You know what? I don't. I never really get... I feel like it's all my creation. And so I'm like... I think the parts when I'm in shows that I'm on screen are the parts I enjoy the least. I love watching other people do it and take it and run with it. Yeah, it's got to be super satisfying. And then what about when you read something and you go, oh, I could play this character. And you get a real specific take on it, that it's a definition of what you do. And then...

You're not auditioning anymore. So you show up on set and everyone's about to see for the first time who they've hired and what version of this character we're going to get. And here comes the Danny McBride special. Is there any like...

Have you, as a director, ever pulled you aside and go, hey man, so, like Ridley Scott, for example. Did you read for that or did he know who he was hiring? Yeah. Did he want you to do something comedic? Because it's obviously, it's not a comedy. You know, he, I had a meeting with him. He called me in for a meeting and I was like,

blown away. I mean, I love that franchise and him, you know, especially. You were so good in that. Oh, I appreciate that. Thank you. I mean, I was so nervous to go in there because the same thing. I'm like, I don't want to, I like these movies. I don't want to ruin them by being in it. Like when it comes up, it somehow takes people out of it. And he kind of, he was just sort of of the mindset where he said that like what he does is he just is the guardrail. He'll put people in his movies that have a distinct personality and

And he just lets them be them. And then he'll be there in case anybody's going too far off the rails. But you know, the other thing that was awesome. Bill Paxton in the first one was a perfect example, right? That's what I kept watching. It was like, he, Bill nailed this. He was incredible in this world. And, and, uh,

You know, the other thing is he does like everything on that movie was like five cameras at all times. Like every, so you, it was like two takes of something and then he would move on. It's the only movie I've ever been on that finished like two or three weeks ahead of schedule. Like every day you'd come in and they'd be like, here's what we're shooting today. And this is in case we get through this, this is tomorrow's sides. And you would get to it all the time. So when you got on that ship for Alien Covenant, yeah.

What was that set like? Is it as cool to be on as it is to see? Because it looks massive. I got this one. Hey, Sean, you know they didn't shoot in space, right? Yeah, and they build it. It's on a movie studio. Wait a minute. What? Single tear. Single tear.

No, it was all built. I mean, you rolled into the soundstage and that ship was for real in there. No way. You could walk through every hall of it. You could sit there. And he designs it so the cameras are like hidden within the set. So like that's how he can get so many shots. Wow. And every shot looks like a Ridley Scott movie. It's not like, you know, only one of the shots is good and the rest are things he'd never use. It's all...

But for the actors, it was kind of awesome because behind the scenes, everybody was so nervous about the fact that he was only doing like two takes. It's almost like they come prepared as if it's live theater or something where people just know that you're not going to have the ability to kind of find it on the day. You just kind of have to come with it and then it's gone.

Wow. That's kind of a great – I liked it. Yeah, that's a great device to keep everybody on their toes a little bit, right? Yeah, why not? Totally. Totally. I really enjoyed it. We should do a comedy space thing, but like full scale like that. Like, you know, not like Spaceballs was a great movie, but that was sort of like on purpose it kind of was meant to be a little lo-fi, a little low tech. But if you did it like on the Ridley Scott scale, no one winking, you know,

What if somebody's got something in their eye so it looks like they're winking? Then it's a tick and you need to be sensitive. Can I ask you a question? Unless, Jay, you want to ask that. No, that's what it's here for. Yeah, that's what the whole show is. I'm still taking questions. For a little bit longer, I'll be here. Yeah.

So wait, so when I was a kid, one of my favorite movies was... So it seems less like a question, more like just a story. Yeah, tell us about yourself. No, when I was a kid, I was obsessed with the movie Halloween. And I watched like the making of it, the behind the scenes, and then there's this new series on, I don't know what, where they do like...

They revisit how they made it. Are you just trying to highlight the fact that you had cable and that Danny didn't? Because he just said he didn't have cable growing up. And now you're talking, I watched behind the scenes. I watched on the other channel. I watched this. This is like a fuck you. This is not a question. This is a fuck you to Danny McBride. No, this is sadly a year ago.

No, but no, I've always been really into that movie because it was, I grew up on it and it was wild. So the fact that you wrote the newest ones, which are so, you know, I have to tell you when the first one, I saw the trailer for the first one to come out, I was like, oh God, I hope they get this right. It's so important to me and so many fans.

And boy, my God, it was amazing. It was incredible how you reimagined it. And then all three of them. And the last one, I loved. It solved so many things. I loved the whole thing. Yeah, how did that come about? You know, one of my other cohorts that I moved to Charleston with is David Green, who's also a director.

Yeah, he's amazing. He did a great job. Right before we moved out of Los Angeles. Well, even getting to Charleston, I'll explain that because that has something to do with Halloween. We shot, I'd never really even been to Charleston before. We shot Vice Principals down here in Charleston and lived here for like six months. Yeah, that's a fantastic show, man. Oh, thank you. And we all had kids around the same age. Everybody's kids were like between three and five when we were shooting Vice Principals. And

we were just, we all lived in LA. We were here for like six months. And then we all went back to Los Angeles. And then after a few months, everyone just started sort of like, man, I really miss it down there. Like sometimes I think it would be cool to just like live there. Would you ever? And everyone started talking and, and,

It turned into this thing where like we ended up, it was like almost like 10 families that all the dudes went one weekend to go suss it out. And then the wives went and then everybody kind of met up. We're like, are we going to do this? Are we going to move to Charleston with our whole crew? And everybody did it. And like it was like six years ago. That's awesome.

Part of it was like, we need to bring work down here. We need to try to pump this industry up down here. And so Halloween was the first thing we sort of did. David and I signed up for that. We're like, this will be a cool project to bring down there and to get people working. So you shot it there? We shot it here, yeah. Yeah, wow. Yeah, so David got approached by Jason Blum to see if he was interested in adapting it. And David knew I was a really big fan of it and asked me what I thought.

And I had the same kind of reaction as you. I was like, fuck, I just love the series so much that it would suck to like create something that diminished it or... And then the more we thought, we're like, well, somebody's going to do it. So like maybe we'll have a better shot of creating it because we really care about it coming out good. I guess anyone would, but... Knocked it out of the park. We just, we had a blast. And I think we never thought about the pressure of it because I feel like...

I was sort of my own worst critic on it. I was like, you know, I'm always like convinced I'm going to ruin things that I touch that I get involved with. So I didn't want to, you know, I was so nervous about it. I think it didn't really register like the weight of the fans and everything until it premiered at it premiered at the Toronto Film Festival. And when I saw the crowd and the amount of people that were lined up and people in the masks and the shirts and

there was just this moment with Dave and I were like, fuck, if this doesn't work, we are about to, like, this is a rabid fan base and they're going to destroy us. And you got killed by 500 Michael Myers. Oh, that's what I thought. That's what I really thought was going to be. And it was such a gratifying feeling when we screened it there and to feel the audience in it at the end and they're applauding and clapping. It was probably one of the coolest moments of anything in my career. That, that moment there with the fans was so much fun. So what you were saying earlier, you really did the work about the characters. Cause if,

that's not there, it would have been such a failure. But really like the backstory and the relationships and everything is what made it so great. Yeah, that's what we like love. I mean, I think a lot of the stuff we're influenced by is a lot of that 70s cinema, which would be character pieces and not necessarily story driven, but sort of, you know, just pieces around characters that are interesting. And so I think we tried to apply that idea to our take on Halloween and see what we could do with that.

So what's your ideal frequency of working? You're down there. You've got all your friends and colleagues down there. Do you guys like to always have something that you're shooting and at the same time kind of working on what the next thing might be? Or do you use it one thing at a time and you're good to just kind of

be shooting only one thing every kind of year and a half or two years or something. You know, Gemstones is about 15 months between like writing it and then shooting it and then post. And so that's taken, I've been on that, you know, one season right after the next. But it was funny, I moved here because I kind of was feeling like I was working too much when I was in Los Angeles. I didn't know how to like...

shut it down. My kids were starting to kind of like take notice of me being gone. And so I sort of like sold it to my wife that like moving to Charleston, we'd be able to chill. And I think we've been like busier here. Is your wife, is your wife from the South? She's not, she's from Los Angeles. And so she, uh, she was, I really wanted to make sure she was okay with this because I, I kind of appreciate the, uh,

the, uh, I don't know. I appreciate all the, the, the, the weird, strange things about the South and, and that not everyone does. And, uh, so I didn't think I was wanting to make sure she was going to dig it, but she loves it here. And then her mom is an Angeleno. She moved here just a few years ago, followed us down here too. And it's been, it's been awesome. It's been a lot of fun. I'm kind of jealous now, the way that you're describing it, and I love Charleston and I actually really liked the South too. And so I was like, I'm kind of jealous the way you're talking about it. And like,

I know. Fuck it, Lou. Maybe we should, guys, should we just move to Charleston? I know. Everybody talks about it, but you guys did it. Let's take the show on the road. What the hell? Does your wife work with you at all? She doesn't, not now. You know, she was a private chef for a while. When I met her, she would, like, translate for deaf and blind students at UCLA. Oh, wow. And that's what she was doing when I met her. And then she became a personal chef for a while.

And, uh, yeah, now she's like, she's an artist too. She like makes bags and paints. And so she, she's been staying pretty busy down here. Do you find that your kids, uh, are looking at what you do as something that they might want to do? Or are they like, like, like our kids, they, they don't give it up. They're like, yeah, they don't, they don't give it up. My daughter kind of gives it up. My daughter is, is eight years old and she, uh,

She loves everything that we do. She sees it. She goes to school and YouTubes me and like will come home saying stuff that she's like, this should not be saying. Oh, really? That's hysterical. But my son doesn't give it up at all. I mean, I think he would rather do anything but what I'm doing probably. What's Declan into right now?

Declan is into right now. What is he into? Is he a sports guy? Is he a video game guy? He is. He's video games. He's kind of whatever, like all of his friends are playing in sports at the time. And, you know, he has it all. Like kind of the cool thing about where we live is the kids can actually just like go outside and go jam. You know, like when we first moved out of L.A., my son was like asking me like if I would teach him how to ride a bike.

And I'm like, why? You're never going to take a bike ride off of Mulholland up here. Yeah. No sidewalks. It's all hills. Unless you want me to drive you to a parking lot and watch you drive around in circles. Yeah, dude. Which is what I did. That's how I did it. I had to put a bike in the back of my car. We live up here in Mulholland. I had to drive three miles to a park to teach my kid how to ride. And now they can't use it because there's nowhere to ride. Yeah.

So he's into that. The outdoors is like, you know, I mean, it's kind of wild. Like the other day, someone just a knock at the door and there's like 10 kids on bikes like Declan here, you know, and they all. I love that. I love that. That's awesome. I got to get like a PlayStation or an Xbox or something for Maple because Willie, we came over to your house the other night and Maple went upstairs and Abel and her played video games for a couple hours. I went up there and watched a little bit.

it's incredible. Like I grew up on Atari and in television and the, the graphics, the, the complexity, it's so bitching. I mean, I think it would be, I mean, I got to get it from me, let alone her. Yeah, I know. I got to an Xbox a few years ago. We played for a minute. Uh, but I, you know, that Xbox came from you. Yeah, man. Yeah. It's sitting in there. We played, uh, uh, what was a super, uh,

some superhero thing for a little while and then that was it. But I'm talking about they were playing Fortnite and this is just like what a world that is. I played with Will. Will, I played with like years and years and years ago. You called me or you got me Call of Duty or one of those games. Yeah. With a headset? Yeah, with the headset. And I played it for a minute and I was like I couldn't get out the door without getting shot over and over again. Like...

We got it. Well, remember we talked about what Krasinski got made us all play when it first came out in 2007. Then Thoreau, who you did Your Highness with. Tropic Thunder. And Tropic Thunder. I was wondering, did...

I'm trying to remember if you wore sleeves in your highness. No, probably not sleeves. Probably not. But you guys had a little Call of Duty league going, right? We had a league going. Justin was like, we used to, I remember years ago, Thoreau and I were out. It was a real great look. A bunch of 45-year-old dudes. We were out for dinner. We were out for dinner with our ladies. We were at the time almost 40. Yeah.

And he goes, and he and I are trying to wrap up dinner real early. And we're like eating and stuff, and we got the check, because there were a bunch of dudes we were all going to be playing online. And finally, one of the ladies goes, are you fucking guys rushing us out of dinner so you can get home to play your fucking video game? We're like, what? What? Fuck you. How dare you? After that, I went back to my Super Mario Brothers. Danny, listen, do you miss anything about L.A. that you...

that you so had readily available that like maybe anything at all? Yeah. I mean, you know, I loved living out in Los Angeles. I really did. Like I lived there for almost 20 years. And so lots of friends and Mexican food. And yeah, but it's been cool. It's been a nice change and it gets me up to New York more. I go and finish posts on the show up in New York. And I love being up there. So the slow, not, I've just never been, I just imagine because it's not a major city. Sean, you've never been to Charleston, South Carolina? No.

No, I want to go. It's going to blow your mind. I would love to go. Let me take you. Come on down. Let me show you my Charleston. But does it, does these, I don't mean this to be insulting in any way to anybody that lives there, but is this slower, I imagine it's slower than a big city. Whoa. And is that something you miss? Whoa.

It is slower. And I think I was so tuned to Los Angeles that like, when I went back to Los Angeles after living here for a few months, I really found myself like not able to keep up. I was like, God, it's just so loud and crowded, crowded here. And it kind of like, I, I was used to it. I, it,

you know, everybody here is just super friendly. When we moved here, every, for a week, people were coming by and just bringing baked goods to our house. I love that. And even one time we came home and they had just like laid it inside the house. Like they had opened up the front door and just like put the cupcakes inside.

You get your head blown off in Los Angeles. Oh, my God. I know. I do want to... Something about that seems so appealing. Well, you know, it's funny. Like, Abel was telling me the other day... Abel's my 12-year-old, and he was telling me that he'd gone to a friend's house. I picked him up, and I said, how was he? He's like, it was pretty good. We went to this other person's house. We walked...

We walked over, which is unusual, right? We walked over from so-and-so's house back to Jonas' house. I was like, cool. And he goes, and we played, you know, Ding Dong Ditch, whatever, you know, it's got so many different names, but, you know, playing Ding Dong Ditch. And I went, hey, man.

No, you can't do that in Los Angeles. It's true. Because people get fucking... I was like, no, no, no. That's such a bummer. It's such a bummer that you can't go. In Charleston, you can steal egg houses probably. You definitely can steal egg houses, yeah. This is how nice our... We have this older couple that lives next door to us and they're so awesome. They're so friendly, so nice. And...

Last summer, there was a hurricane that came through here. We were shooting gemstones. It was one of those things where we had to decide, are we going to shut down production? Are we going to let people go home? Is this going to come? Is it going to hit us? We ended up shutting down production. People went home, but we shut it down the day it was arriving. My wife and one of our friends scurried around the house trying to secure the stuff outside from blowing around. They did all that. I come home.

we just like decide we're going to wait the hurricane out. We're just going to drink wine and chill and like watch it. And so that's what we do. And it's a blast. We're having a great time watching it all go. See if you can get inside the actual eye. Hearing each other to run outside. But well, like right as the worst part of the storm passed, uh,

Our next-door neighbor, like, texts my wife, and she's like, oh, this is horrible. And my wife was like, oh, it's fine. Just drink some wine. It's great. It's like it's almost done. And she's like, no, this is horrible. And she sends a picture of this 25-pound dumbbell from our gym underneath the house, and it had flown through their second-story window and was, like, sitting in their dining room.

And I'm like, what the fuck? How would that have happened? How would a weight have gotten up there? And so I go downstairs where the gym is. The garage door is shut. Everything's in there. I'm like, what the fuck? How did this get up there? And then I look out in the backyard. I'm like, the trampoline. Where's the trampoline? And so I go up and my wife and her friend had put the weights on the trampoline to weigh it down. Oh, my God.

And then the wind took it and it fucking sailed. It like flew up in the air and flew into their front yard and through the dumbbell right through their window. I thought for sure, I thought it was so mortified. I had no idea what we should do. Like, would we go over now? Do we let them come to our house? And they, they,

They never were bothered by it. They were so friendly. Oh, it's not your fault. They actually baked you a fresh baked pie. Yeah, they were incredible. I'm like, this could have been worse. Sean, didn't you tell me about a club you went to once where everything that wasn't tied down got blown? I think it was called Dumbbells too, wasn't it?

Yeah, I just... After a while, they let me in. I didn't have to see the bounce or anything. That's so fucking crazy, though. What an awesome story. Honestly, Sean, I... Because I know Sean, every time Sean goes to a different... And Jay's like this, too, actually. I think everybody is. But every time you go to a different place, Sean's always like, I want a movie. He starts looking at real estate. Yeah, I do. Immediately start looking at links. I know, it's amazing. And...

And so I think that if Sean were to come, Sean, if you were to go down to South Carolina, you and Scotty, you'd be like, sorry, man, we're moving to South Carolina. I know I have a couple of friends that live there. And I know I just never been there. And now a word from our sponsor. And now back to the show.

It's a lot of golf down there, Danny. Do you play golf at all? I've played. I'm not any good, but I definitely, you have to go out. You have to get, I mean, everyone golfs down here. There's some pretty cool spots too. But what about the heat? Good Lord. You got the ocean to jump in. Yeah. And you know, it's only really bad in the summertime. The rest of the year, it's pretty mild. It's great. But I feel like even if it's humid or if it's not humid, if it's above like 85, regardless, my ice is inside anyway. I'm not going to be much of a screen on that. Yeah.

Well, I really want to go. Tell us about what that moment was when... So Will Ferrell and Adam McKay, they see Foot Fist Way. They say, yes, please, we want to work with you. What was that start of that collaboration or that relationship with those guys like? And them sort of nurturing you and validating you. Was that...

Did you know at the time that, okay, this is a nice greased path into what we really want to do? Or did you think it was just kind of like a one-time thing? We had no clue. I mean, honestly, we were so – it was funny. Like I went to film school and I had been kind of –

trying to do this. I wasn't trying to be an actor. I went to film school for writing and directing. But then when the moment came, it was sort of like we were just kind of both of us were shocked. I mean, it was like we went from just doing our day jobs to suddenly meeting our heroes and meeting people that were doing it for a living. And it was an incredible time period. And Adam and Will sat us down and asked us what we wanted to do next. And

that's when we pitched them eastbound and down and they were kind of confused that we wanted to make a TV show. They're like, well, aren't most people trying to make TV shows to get movies? You know, like you already have the movie. You don't need to do the TV show. And we were like, yeah, you know, I don't know. There's something about this. We just, we feel like it would like work better as a TV show. And, uh,

Yeah, I feel like them being attached is the only reason I think why the show stayed alive. You know, we sold that show to a different regime at HBO. And then, you know, I think when the new people showed up, I think they were kind of like, what did we buy? Like, what is this? Like, I remember seeing...

We had a week left of shooting and we got these panic calls. I think it was the first time that anyone had watched what we were doing down in North Carolina. And they were asking, can you give Kenny Powers a dog? Can he have a kid that he helps? Anything that we can do in the last week here to make this guy more likable. Are you a baseball fan? Where did the world come from?

You know, that's like I wasn't a baseball fan. I mean, I am now, but that's the thing. When I was writing it, I never even thought about that I would need to know how to throw or pitch or anything until we got down to shoot the pilot. And they like, do we need to get a specialist or something? I'm like, yeah, sure. So we got this guy from the local college.

And he's like, let me see what you have. And I threw a ball. And he's like, oh, Jesus, good thing this is a comedy. It's like, you know, so I was like constantly being like. Well, he's a failed pitcher, right? Yeah. There's a reason he's not doing well. Every time I throw the ball, it always like punches in right past me. You never have to see my full form. Oh, my God. I have a question about like for all three of you guys. For Sean? Yeah. Sure, thank you. Again, this is a great venue for your questions. Yeah.

When you, Danny, when you, and by the way, I want to know, Jace, with you directing and writing, Will, I know you've all written and starred in something or directed and starred in something. Is it a lot, like the older you get, are you feeling like, you know, it's really great to wear a lot of hats, but maybe just the one hat now is fine. Less work. Or do you prefer just to show up and know your lines as an actor and then go home? Or do you still enjoy doing it all?

I like that every once in a while just to show up and wait for them to knock on the trailer and say, time to come out and talk. And then you do that for about 10 minutes and then you go back in. Yeah, because it just seems like an overwhelming amount of... I find the reverse. The older I get, the more I just want to do this stuff again.

that I create. Yeah. Yeah. And work hard, hard, hard, yeah? Yeah, but I did work hard, but also like then you get to control and Danny's been doing it for a long time. I know, that's why I was asking like Danny too, like don't you, I'm just thinking about the Halloween things or anything where you write, but then you go run off and act and now this show that you're in right now, you're doing both. It just seems like a lot.

It is a lot. You know, show running is definitely difficult. I mean, that kind of process of having to deal with the scripts at the same time you're dealing with production, it's a ton. And then go have to, and then act. And then you have to know your lines and go act. And have your energy up for it. I just like the collaboration of filmmaking a lot.

lot like i love you know working with the guys that i direct with so sometimes i just get lonely if it's just me directing it's like uh it's just i'm the only one here and where i like working with the other guys i like what we come up with together i think there's something fun about that danny are you watching somebody or something right now that's that's that's keeping you kind of motivated and thinking forward and um like i don't know i was thinking for we're talking about halloween and and

combining comedy and filmmaking and all that stuff. Like Jordan Peele's a really exciting guy nowadays. It gets me really, really excited in that world. Um, are you watching him or somebody like that? That's that's floating your boat. Yeah, I definitely like him a lot. Uh,

You know, like, weirdly, when it comes to TV stuff, I find myself just watching, like, reality TV. Like, my brain just doesn't want to commit to anything. So, like, I'm all about the Vanderpumps right now. That shit's on fire right now. Everybody talks about that. It is a wipeout, isn't it? It's just so good. Do you watch it, Jay? Yeah, I've seen it. It's just, I love all that. And it's also just the way they make those shows now, the whole reality world,

It's really well done. You know, like they've figured it out. There's a format there and they're starting to play with the form a little bit too. And it's, I like that. Well, here's what's weird. And I haven't watched a single frame of Vanderpump Rules.

That's right. Vanderpump Rules? Yeah. But I saw, and we know Andy, we talked about Andy Cohen. I know Andy a little bit. And I saw a few clips recently, I guess some shit went down on Vanderpump recently that blew everybody's mind. There's like an affair. Oh, yeah, there's a whole thing. And people don't like this person. Here's the thing. They talk about him like they're characters. And so they have them on these follow-up shows and they're like, well, I think at that moment that so-and-so did this. I think that she's really coming to terms with it. I'm like, wait, this is not, you're talking about...

They're supposed real people. They're supposed real lives. And she's sitting next to you. And she's sitting next to you. And you're talking about, she's really making decisions that I don't think that she understands. And you're like, wait, what the fuck are we talking about, man? Yeah, it's strange. What is happening? It's so strange.

They must fight the instinct or maybe they're asked to, you know, cause trouble, but you kind of fight the instinct to cause trouble to make for good drama probably. So I wonder how much of it is them, how much of it is them trying to really contribute. That's what it's gotta be. I mean, even the fact that like so many of these reality shows are ensembles, you know, and it seems like everyone's fighting for their, you know, for their notoriety or for how they leave their mark or become the most exciting train for their water cooler moment. Yeah. Yeah. Mm-hmm.

Yeah, that's so true. Vanderpump. Oh, God. Oh, God. I got to watch it now. This season has been phenomenal. How long has it been on? You know, I stopped watching it for a while, and then I heard the news about this affair that happened, and I was like, oh, I need to tune back in and see what these Vanderpumps have been up to. Does Vanderpump their name? No, it's Lisa Vanderpump is the lady who owns the restaurant they all work out. But I like just saying it plural. I just think it sounds fun. Vanderpumps. Vanderpumps. But wait. That's somebody's name.

last name on the show. Yeah. And wait, and all these people work at her restaurant? That's right. Yep. I still watch, I still watch the Jersey Shore. You still watch the Jersey Shore, huh? Yeah. I still watch it. That counts. Just for the big burly dudes? Yeah. Ha ha ha.

All right. So now you're powered down for the summer. Where are you and your little band of criminals going for the summer? Are you going to take a big vacation? I think I am. My kids have never really been outside of the country. So I think we're going to do a straight up big European vacation. Yeah, you are. We're going to Griswold. We're going to France. Come on. We're going to Italy. We're going to go to Germany. It's going to be awesome. Awesome.

So this is going to be one week, two weeks, three weeks? It's going to be seven weeks. Come on. Everybody's going to take one little suitcase. That's our deal. And we're meeting different people on the way. Walton Goggins. Oh, yeah. Love Walton. We've rented a fortress in Sicily for a week, so I'll see his family at one point. Wow.

Now, are you going to drive like the Griswolds? Are you going to take trains or is it going to be a combination of all of it? It's a combo of both. I'm going to try to rent a car as much as I can. I just want to get the full experience, but we'll train it up a little bit too. Seven weeks. I tell you what, driving in Italy is the best because you think like it's, people are like, no, that must be insane. I'm like, no, it's the best because there's a madness, there's like a method to the madness of it and it makes sense. It's not like here where nobody drives with a,

nobody uses a turn signal and all that shit. Everybody's the worst. Over there, it's bang. Everything happens. Make sure you drive in Germany so you can go without any speed limit on the Autobahn. That's the whole thing, right? That's the climax of the vacation. Sure it is. Right. It's okay to hurt people because you're at the end. Yeah.

Jesus. But seven weeks all together. I mean, have you guys done that lately? We've never done it before. Yeah. Buckle up. We've never done it. Yeah. I'm looking forward. I felt like now was the time. My son is like starting to get a lot of friends outside of his family circle. And I feel like it will be very hard, I think, in a year to convince him to like hang with his fam for the whole summer. I think now it's now or never. When you go on trips, guys, like do you think about like –

I think about like where's the nearest hospital or a doctor if something should happen or you know what I mean? Like also I bet like your, what is it called? A dope? What is it called? Dopamine? No, the bag, the toiletry bag. Well, what is it called? Dop kit. Dop kit. That your dop kit should have like all of the like

you know, Tylenol and like all the stuff that you should have ready. And you're a real blast. You're a real blast to hang out with. You know that? You are. Yeah. Do you get injured a lot? No one in my family is allowed to get headaches while we're gone. Danny, are all the, are the family's passports up to date? Have you looked at that? Everybody's up to date. Yep. Everybody. That's a common, like oopsie daisy. Yeah. Everyone's excited for nothing. Yep. Nope. They're all up to date. Oh,

I love... I'm so jealous. Why don't we all just move to South Carolina for real? Yeah, come to Charleston. Yeah, let's just go to Charleston. That's the first step. Let's go to Charleston. It's real nice down there. Oh, my God. I can't wait to go. I'm not kidding. I want to go. I want to see it. I'm just jealous. Let me ask you, Danny, I know you said you love L.A., and there's a lot of great things about L.A. and New York, but do you kind of relish, like...

being out of the grind a little bit that you get to have this kind of experience that is not just always focused. I know you work a lot with,

But here sometimes work and social life and all that can just become one because it's such a company town. Yeah. Do you kind of relish that, that you don't, all your touch points aren't about, like Bateman, every single thing touch point in his life is about show business. Yeah, yeah. My underwear is just trade papers folded up nicely. Everything is within the context, the framework of show business. He has no real world experience. No. Yeah.

I, you know, I do. I do like that. I like getting away from it. I mean, you know what? It's kind of cool about it is that I felt like when I was in L.A., you see billboards everywhere. You're constantly thinking about work. You know, it's just it's hard to get away from it. And here it's kind of cool because you don't see any of that. There's no billboards for any movies or TV shows are coming out. And then you kind of it kind of puts it in perspective what you're doing. You know, this is just.

seasoning for people. It's not what the whole thing doesn't revolve around this. And when you entertain people, that's it. That's all you're just giving them. Yes. Well, you should go to Portugal. Bateman, can you hear this? Yeah. Can you fucking hear? It's not important, man. Right.

What about when you walk into a market though? Do people there, do they just go, oh my god, what are you doing here? This is a guy on movies and television. You know what? People have been pretty cool I think because – I don't know. I think people know that I'm here and so then they're sort of – they're nice. I mean you got to watch – I don't go to bars or anything late at night when everybody is like inhibitions are down.

or any of that stuff. But yeah, I kind of, I mean, it's fun like going to, like my kids just go to public school here. So I mean, like I love going to these like PTA meetings and these things just sitting in the back. I love it. I think it's awesome. I will say, Danny reminds me of, you've got, because of a lot of the characters you've played, you mentioned,

And we all know that when you run into people after they've had a few cocktails, that's when people feel like, "You're definitely taking a photo with me." And you're like, "Hey, man, I'm eating dinner." They're like, "I don't care. You're taking a photo right now." But you play a lot of these characters that dudes probably come up to you a lot super aggressively when they've had a few. - Oh, 100%. - They're like, "Fuck yeah, Kenny Power!" Like, I've been-- You know, when you hang out with Ferrell, he gets that a lot, 'cause everybody's like, "He's like America's fucking best friend."

Sherwin's like, fuck yeah. Yeah, here comes Johnny High Five. Fucking hit the tank. And you're like, all right, man. It's always somebody like you can smell the booze in their breath. They're putting their sweaty arm around you and they're on their phone trying to show you how they dressed up like you for Halloween. Like that's always what it is. That's hysterical. Yeah, dinner at 530. That's the key.

That is the key. That's totally the key. Danny, we appreciate your time. Thank you for sharing an hour with us, my friend. Wait, tell us again when Gemstones is coming out. Gemstones, June 18th. June 18th. And then we're going to need the address of your place there in Charleston while you're gone for seven weeks so we can just kind of try it out and stay in your house there. I think you should. So that's a great time to kind of test drive Charleston.

I might do some exercise in your backyard on the trampoline with the weights. There you go. The trampoline is gone. All right. Danny, thank you, my friend. Have a great trip this summer. Everybody watch Gemstones, and please come back and talk to us anytime you want. Thanks, Danny. Thank you so much. Thanks for having me on. I really appreciate it. Thank you, dude. Great to see you, man. Good to see you, too. All right, bud. Bye.

There's a guy who's never not funny. I know. I love everything he does. And sweet. Sweet and funny. Will, wasn't that your handle in high school? Sweet and funny. Sweet and funny, yeah. I'm also kind of, like, amazed. Like, that's why I asked that question earlier. I'm so amazed that when people do, like, you just can't imagine, like, writing and show running and then being in it and, like, being good in it like he is, like...

Like, Jason, like you are. Like, Ozark, when you directed the thing, and then you would just jump in front of the camera and act brilliantly. I mean, what part could he not play? What movie would you not want him in? He could do the comedy, do the drama. He could just write if you want him not on it. I know, which he often does as well. Or direct it. Isn't that rare, though? Yeah. That you can just pick up a pen, write a part for yourself in a show that you created, and then go make it.

Yeah, and he does these shows for like three years at a time and then shuts it down and then starts a brand new one. I want to get into that line of work. I'd like to be his McGroom. Wonderful. Anybody? Wonderful. Guys, I love you so much. I love you. Are you just going to say goodbye? We're just going to say goodbye. Well, I got to go bye-bye because I got to go to this thing.

Oh, cool. Go to your thing. It's really great having seen you both today. Sean, you know, I heard this, Sean. By the way, you're going to do your play tonight again. What's it called, Will? It's called Good Night, Oscar. And what theater is it at? And it's at the Tribasco. Tribasco. Tribasco Theater. Over there. And by the way, it's been doing really well. Very well. And it's been sold out. And in fact, you can't even get a seat, but you can be put on...

And bye. Oh, nice. Smart. Smart. Smartless is 100% organic and artisanally handcrafted by Bennett Barbico, Michael Grant Terry, and Rob Armjarff. Smart. Less.

Rex Chapman, hello. Hello, Rex. Hello, Will, Sean, Jason. So great to be here. How is it going? Thank you for talking with us. So we got this new podcast with you called Owned. We're very, very excited you said yes to doing this. Thank you so much. I'm so grateful you guys asked. When they said that Rex Chapman was going to do a podcast with us, I said, how are we possibly going to do a podcast about moonshine? But you know what? What?

They said it's not. It's not. Right. It's not that. It's going to be about sports owners. But you are here today because of Owned, which is a SmartList Media podcast that we're so lucky to have you. So nice that you said yes to do that. I'm so thankful you guys asked. It's fantastic. It's out now. I'm appreciative and grateful.

Yeah. It's really, really great. Tell us briefly exactly what it is and why you wanted to do it. Talk to us like the dummies we are. Maybe like a listener that has no idea what this is about. Yeah, I'm going to go. No, I'm going to bring... Okay, you ready? Talk to me now. All right. All right, here we go. So you know how you guys with...

your movies or your TV shows, there's a financier, a person who's paying the bills, footing the bill. Sometimes those guys, those women, people, they don't know anything about making a movie or a TV show. And I'm sure for you guys, that's

Pretty frustrating when that person wants to have say as to what's going on on on film. It can be a challenge Well, you're looking at my track record. I don't know anything about Sports ownership is really no different I mean there are good owners and there are not so good owners and there are bad owners and

Most of them are millionaires to billionaires and they do this for a hobby. Some are very good. Some of them have sports backgrounds and those owners are usually pretty good to work for and play for. The others though are, are not just as you might imagine. I was, they were asking me earlier about some of the owners I had. I played for two owners, four owners, uh, two. The first one was in Charlotte.

And that was a guy named George Shin, and he was very cheap, didn't spend a lot. I remember a couple. We got a transistor radio for Christmas one year and a monogrammed Bible one year. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. Yeah, yeah. And so then I was traded from there and went to Washington and played for the old Bullets. Abe Mullen was the owner. And my first day there, I get to the locker room,

And we're practicing. We don't have a practice facility. It's at Bowie State University. And it's got like a literal play stage on the side of the gym. It's a high school gym. Right. But we're in there. I'm in there and there's a note on my chair by my locker, very first day. And it asks me, says, you can...

Take your gear home and wash it every day. Or you can have $25 taken out of your check every week so we can pay the equipment manager to wash your shit for you. What? It's a professional basketball team. Professional basketball team. What year was that? This was 1992-ish. Did you have to drive yourself to away games? No, but in Washington—

You're not supposed to take buses in the NBA anything longer than an hour and a half. So you can travel like Philly to D.C. maybe. Right. We traveled all over the East Coast on buses. You did? Boston, New York, New Jersey to D.C. And, you know, we'd play the Knicks sometimes at home.

And then play them the next night in the garden, and they would beat us home because they flew back after the game. Sure. And we're driving up on a bus the next day. Wait, and you guys are—and you're not—how tall are you, Rex? 6'3", 6'4". Right. So, again, I mean, still, by NBA standards, maybe not the tallest, but also very tall. Right, right. And the rest of your teammates, you probably had guys who were 6'7", 6'8".

Crammed on a bus? I mean, that's not good for the product. Yeah, it's not good. It's not good for the product. But that was an ownership that just didn't spin. I was traded, though. I was traded, though, from there to Miami.

The Miami Heat, who are currently playing in the NBA Finals. Yeah. Great ownership. Mickey Arison got there. He was one of the first team owners to buy a plane. We got a plane our first year. So now we're not even flying commercial, which most other teams do. Yeah. We have our own plane, and that changes the whole game. And as you guys know, too, it's not just spending on the top players. Right. It's not just spending on the marquee actor. No.

It's spending on everybody and making everyone feel loved and valued. And that's what the good owners do. I went on to Phoenix and played for Jerry Colangelo, another great owner. So it just boils down to, you know, which owners are good, which owners are not. And the ones that aren't just kind of back off and, you know, let people do their jobs. And it's not just money. It's also just like that trickle-down effect vibe-wise to the whole team is so important, right, from the ownership? No question. You know...

The owners that know your kids and your wife's name and your, you know, the people that come to the game with you, the owners that, it's no different than life. Relationships, man. Yeah, that's what I like about it. Like, it's no secret I'm not a massive sports fan, but listening to this podcast owned, I'm like really into it because of what you just said because it's,

I love the human stories and like I'm really, really into how that all works and like everything you just said, I think it's fascinating. I think you make a great point, Sean, and I probably should have said this. This isn't targeted for sports nuts. This is targeted for people that listen to your guy's show who are entertainment people who love storytelling and are going to get some of these crazy owners. Wait, hey, by the way, Rex, sorry, just speaking of sports nuts, did you wear a cup?

No. You were in the NBA? No. I did not. It's a good question. We do that. You know, I think back and, you know, why didn't we wear cups? But you also rarely get hit in the balls in basketball. I wore one to high school just so I could feel a little more masculine.

But it's fun to sort of vicariously live through these owners. How many people have said, boy, if I had $10 billion, what would you do? What would you buy? And so to hear about what these massively wealthy people do with all of that influence and access and...

uh, and permission. Um, a lot of them do the right thing and a lot of them do the wrong thing. And that's kind of some of the stuff you explore. Yeah, no question. Uh, the good ones are always fun. The bad ones are fun. For instance, we have, uh,

Rick Riley on SportsMind. Oh, yeah, I love Rick. And we have an episode on Marge Schott. Yeah. And we ask Marge Schott. Marge used to say the N-word regularly. Wow. She let her dogs poop on Riverfront Stadium out there in the field. What?

But Rick was telling us a story. He said, we asked him, you know, any just crazy, weird story with Marge? He said, I don't know where to start. But he came up with one. He went to interview her at her house, and she was off chasing the dogs around, and he was kind of meandering through the halls. And she walks back, and he pulls out of a drawer a Nazi armband. Oh, wow. And he asks Marge about this, and she just kind of poo-poos it and says, oh, yeah, just...

you know, just something in the drawer there. A little memorabilia. A little memorabilia. And this lady was running the Cincinnati Reds for years and years and years. I mean, see, those are the kind of stories that you don't hear anywhere. Right. And other guests that you've had on, Larry Wilmore, Paul Sherb, Russell Crowe, Ike Barinholtz, like a lot of people have been coming on. It's fantastic. I wasn't sure I wanted to do this with you guys because normally I just entertain the Oscar winners. We've got Russell Crowe and Natalie Portman.

Right, sure. None of you guys have won Oscars yet, have you? Now, what's Natalie talking about? They didn't give him out for the Millers on CBS. Sorry, go ahead, Rex. Natalie's part of a soccer team, right? Natalie. A women's soccer team. Yes, the LA Angels. FC. Oh, the Angels. Angels, yes, yeah. She's part owner, huh? Part owner. No way. They've got a ton of famous...

actors, entertainers, athletes that own that squad. And it's become a big deal. And they are so mission-oriented. You should talk to Peter Guber. He's part owner of the Dodgers. Love to. Golden State Warriors, right? Uh-huh, yeah. Oh, something else, too. I know you've got a connection because you rarely miss a Dodgers game, don't you, Jason? Well, I go to about 20 or 30 a year, yeah.

I love them. Did you guys play? Did any of the three of you play sports seriously as a kid? I played everything a little bit except for football. My mother wanted me to play soccer because she was from England. So I never got to play football. But everything else I played, I loved. I played a little bit too. I mean, I played everything at a very average rate. But I loved playing stuff, and I'm a huge sports nut.

The other guy you should talk to, by the way, is Sean Hayes. We all made the same joke. Tom Warner. Oh, yeah. He's part owner of the Red Sox and Liverpool FC, which is my club, and now the Pittsburgh Penguins. Fantastic.

Yeah, they'll come on. You guys are going to throw these owners our way. You know this is a smart list thing. And you guys should share. Let's share. Sean, what did you play? What sports did you play in school growing up? Did you play soccer? I played baseball. I was on the Wrens and the Roadrunners. The Wrens and the Roadrunners. Yeah, different years. And then I played football one year. Tackle.

Yeah. Did you really? I'd be in the, I don't remember, I think I played a safety, and I'd be in the scrimmage line, right? And I'd be in the stance, you know, in all fours. And the guy across from me inevitably would always say something like, I'm going to fuck you up, I'm going to kill you, I'm going to, like, you know, kind of get in my head. And I would take it so personally. I'd be like, I literally have done nothing to you. Why would you speak to me that way? And, uh...

I used to take it so personally. And then I would only want to go to McDonald's or get like the free, you know, pop or soda. You know what's funny about that? You never went to McDonald's in the middle of the game, did you? You know what's crazy about that is as most of us play sports just to have fun and to do something with our friends. But there comes a point where if you're going to really play seriously, you almost have to be an asshole. Yeah.

And it's contrary to everything we teach our kids. Raise your kids to be polite, nice, respectful, help each other, all of that stuff. No, not on the basketball court once you get to, you know, senior and high school maybe. But it's just different. You got to kind of be a jerk. When I played for the Roadrunners, I was auditioning for commercials too at the same time. And I get up to the plate and the coach thought he was being real supportive like,

"Hays, hit that out." Oh, it was United Airlines commercial. I auditioned for it. He goes, "Hit it all the way to United Airlines." And I'm like, "You don't have to do that. It's really nice, but I'm just trying to hit the ball. It's very kind of you, but you don't have to relate the two." -Hey, Rex. -You know? Hey, Rex, is there a common denominator in terms of warning signs with a new owner coming in that you got to look for? Are there things...

No, I don't think players, players normally just play. The funny thing though, is that you can always tell at practices or, you know, it's kind of, you're punching the clock. You're putting your time in. Don't let the owner walk into practice. The owner walks into practice, everything ratchets up a notch or two notches. Everybody plays harder, wants to put on their best face for the owner.

And it doesn't matter what team, what franchise, if the owner walks into practice, you know you're going to have a hard practice because the coach is going to push you harder and the players are going to play harder. Yeah, as a boss, the guy who signs the check comes in. I don't care if I'm sweeping in the corner. If the boss walks in, I'm sweeping at twice the pace. That's exactly right. Especially if they've got a Nazi armband on. Yeah, that's good.

That's going to make you pick up the pace if you see a fucking actual Nazi. Turbo. Jesus. That is so funny.

That is genius. Rex. It does get your attention. Rex Chapman. It's called Owned. It is fun, funny, dynamic, surprising. You're great. The guests are great. We're so lucky to have you part of the SmartList Media family. Very cool we got you. God bless you. It's such a great show. I love it. Thanks so much for having me, guys. Rex, thanks so much. We love you, pal. Thank you. Love you, guys. Talk soon.

Well, that's a man that can host a podcast, clearly. Yeah. Got a nice speaking voice. And he was a huge NBA star. And he understands the sport right from the inside. Uh-huh. Yeah. He can, I mean, we're in good hands with him, it seems like. Yeah. You know? I guess we could do, I don't know about you guys, but I never read his autobiography. Check out Owned. Out now, wherever you get your podcasts.

This episode was recorded on May 25th. If you like SmartList, you can listen early and ad-free right now by joining Wondery Plus in the Wondery app or on Apple Podcasts. Before you go, tell us about yourself by filling out a short survey at wondery.com slash survey.