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Do you know who the most important person in the world to me at this particular moment in time is? Right now. You are. How do I develop friendships or relationships that actually mean something that are going to last for a very long time? What does everybody say? They say they keep the circle small, right? And then you ask them, why do you keep the circle small? And what do they say? They say, I'm tired of getting screwed over.
I am tired of people violating my trust. I am tired of feeling used. What do they say? They say people lie, cheat and steal. And I, they do. They do. Happens all the time. Happens to me. Unfortunately, that's just part of life. And you are going to go through those things and you need to go through those things. It's a learning process.
Instead of wasting all your time being pissed because you got used or you got screwed over, look, think about what did you do to put yourself in the position to be able to be screwed over, learn from that, and never put yourself in that position again. Now, we're getting off topic here, and that's a completely another, that's a whole other subject, but what makes a good friend? What do we all think makes good friends? All right.
You want somebody that you can trust, right? Well, to develop trust, that takes a lot of time, right? You want somebody that you have confidence in. It takes a lot of time to develop confidence with somebody. You want somebody you can depend on. You want somebody that's reliable. You want somebody that's going to be there for you when you need them, right? All of those things take a lot of time. Remember,
When it comes to building a relationship, it's just like anything else. You get what you put into it, and what you put into it is your time. So let's go through a little math here. I think I have a better way to explain this. So let's just get to it. All right. So we'll say we have Mr. Popular here. Okay. Mr. Popular, he has all kinds of friends for...
for easy math we'll say he has 24 friends. So 24 friends. Alright and then there's there's Sean over here. Me. Sean has four friends. That's it. I only have four friends. That's about the right amount of people I have in my circle excluding family. So take a look at that. Alright so all these tick marks right?
That's Mr. Popular. He has 24 friends. Then you have Sean over here. Am I pointing the right way? He has four friends. All right? So bear with me. Let's do some math. All right? There's 24 hours in a day. Correct? 24 hours in a day. That means Mr. Popular can only give one hour a day to all of his, you know, 24 friends that he keeps in his circle.
So what do we have to do? We have to sleep, right? They say you need eight hours of sleep a night. Okay, now you have 16 hours left. You got to go to work. All right, you go to work. Most people work eight hours a day. That's eight, eight hours left in the day that aren't used up, right? So then we got to get ready for work. We got to do the dishes. We got to
do chores, whatever, all kinds of shit that we don't want to do, right? We'll just, for easy math, we'll say one more hour. So we have seven hours left in the day, okay? Seven hours to spend with the people in our circle. So seven hours times 60, that's 420 minutes. 420 minutes divided by 24 people, right?
17.5 minutes per person. Okay, so we'll do the same thing for Sean. He only has four friends. So we divide his by four. That's 105 minutes, which equals one hour and 45 minutes left or one hour and 45 minutes to spend with each of his four friends. Okay, so
Going back here, Mr. Popular, right? He has 24 friends. He can only spend 17 minutes and 30 seconds with each of his 24 friends. Sean over here with the small circle of only four friends can spend an hour and 45 minutes with each one of his friends per day. Now, earlier we talked about
what makes friends, right? Confidence, trust, all that good stuff. And what do we say? That takes a lot of time to develop confidence, trust, somebody that's going to be there for you, all that kind of good stuff. So my question is, who do you think is going to develop confidence
those relationships faster? Is it going to be Mr. Popular, who has 24 friends and he can only dedicate 17 minutes and 30 seconds to each friend per day? Or is it going to be Sean, who has four friends and he can dedicate one hour and 45 minutes to each friend per day? I think you're getting the gist of what I'm saying. You're going to develop
longer, lasting, more meaningful relationships and friendships by keeping the circle small. Okay? Be selfish with your time and who you spend it with. Here are some things that I think about when I'm spending time with people and I'm trying to decide who gets that time. I heard this phrase a while ago. Actually, it's a question some time ago, and it really resonated with me, and it made a lot of sense.
And so I'm going to ask you the question right now. Do you know who the most important person in the world to me at this particular moment in time is? Right now, you are. So with that being said, think about that for a minute. Just think about it. You are blowing everybody else in your life off to spend time with whoever that person is. That's very hard to argue.
whether you want to admit it or not, whoever you're spending your time with at that particular moment in time is the most important person in the world to you. You could be spending it with anybody else, but you're spending it with that particular person. So with that being said, now that you've given the person that you're spending the time with the title of the most important person in the world to you at that particular moment in time,
Maybe that will help you decide who you want to give that title to before you just give it away. Be a little more choosy. It makes a hell of a lot of sense, doesn't it? Now, here's another thing. Here's the circles, right? So, every time you spend time with somebody outside of your circle, you're saying no to somebody in your circle. So, what does that mean?
Think about it. Every time you say yes to somebody that's not in your circle, you are taking time away from somebody in your circle that deserves your undivided attention and your time. The more time that you put into the relationship with the people that you love, that you want to be friends with, the more you're going to get out of it as you're investing in your relationships. So if you are a poor investor and you invest in shit that doesn't matter,
then you're just going to have a bunch of shallow relationships that mean absolutely nothing and nobody's going to be there for you. So be choosy with your time. Time is everything when it comes to relationships. I hope that helps.
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