C01 - Ep. 75 - Of Life & Breath - Curmudgeons & Dragons
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This episode of Tales from the Stinky Dragon is sponsored by BetterHelp. What are your self-care non-negotiables? Maybe you never skip leg day or maybe therapy day.

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This is a Rooster Teeth production. Long time no see, all you shadow dragons. Swoop on into the stinky dragon, swallow our latest swill, shots in the dark. It's a mixture of nightclaw seltzer, living shadow sake, a bitter bite of lemon, and a dash of darkened dill. One nip of this necrotic nightcap, you'll be lights out without a shadow of a doubt. Hmm. Ha!

Previously our adventurers skirmished with several Shadrow in a darkened Geo. After hearing some spying chilling screams, most of the party headed to a house where they found Elder Namido being tortured by the leader of the Shadrow, Bolink.

After a tenacious tussle, the party followed him into a black portal to a dark place and a scaly situation. Nab and Ike Kaplan's resume this rancid recitation. We always learn things that our characters would not have learned. Yeah, I was thinking about that. So I'm like, how do I carry this information? So what did you learn that your character doesn't know? Their names and... What was the name?

Just keep going with the story, guys. So you didn't learn anything. Okay, very good. Did not learn a thing. I was curious if that's what would happen or not. Namido. That you knew already. Yeah. Namido. Namido. Namido. I wrote down the pronunciation.

You step through the mist of blackened shadows and everything goes dark. Your skin feels clammy and cold, and in the distance you hear the rumbling of thunder and rustling of wind. You blink your eyes and you can barely tell the difference between open and closed. All you can make out are silhouettes: gray outlines of bare trees, jagged stones, thick swirling clouds overhead. Thunder and wind get louder and deeper.

Give us a taste of that. Give us a taste of that. That pitchfork tongue.

I was imagining like a... No, not up. I liked where Gus went. A shadowy figure emerges from the ground before you. The shadow forms into a slender, long-haired woman with pointed ears and indigo eyes. A thin smile curls along her black lips. Do you like what I've done with the place part?

I tried not to rearrange anything since you were last here. I wanted everything to look just like you left it. Or should I say... Left them. I'd show you around, but you're a bit early to the party. A bit rude if you ask me. Don't worry though, my pal Ladoria here will teach you some manners.

A plume of shadowy flames erupts from the beast's scaly snout and engulfs you in a black inferno. Everyone rolled like 30 saving throws. Is this Enku? Yes, you know that. The pause is like, what do they know and what do they not know? 21. 28. I did a nat 20. Nice.

Turn off my computer. 20. 20. If I sound funny, I had a cold last week. It's you can't tell with gum gum. Cool. Because you already talked low. I don't know if it matters, but Kyber did a check instead of a save.

One day you guys are going to learn. Someday. Let's see. Strength saving throws plus a strength text. So add another four to that. To me? Yeah, 25. Thanks, Barbara. I figured your save was higher. Yes, I appreciate that. Add three to that. I'm sorry. So it's a 24. 24. I'll take it. Hey, you know what? Deal. Or no deal. No deal. I'll take it, Howie. I want more intelligence saving throws. For some reason, I have a higher intelligence saving throw and we do intelligence rolls and I'm never good on them. Okay.

I don't think this dragon's gonna whip out a quiz and say, "Alright, bring out your number two pencils." A nerd can wish. Well, we are talking about dragons here. Yeah! Uh, so Bart and Kyborg make the save. Mud and Gum-Gum both fail. What? With a 20? Yeah. My goodness. Gum-Gum, you rolled an 8. No, I have advantage, so I rolled twice. Oh. Wait, why does he fail if he rolled a 20? So high. 'Cause he failed. Wait, wait, wait. The check was higher than that. The 20 was a save?

So if you fail to save, you take 65 points of damage. If you succeeded, like Bart and Kyborg did, you take 32. What kind of damage is this? Necrotic.

Would you say I'm frightened? No, you are not, but Gum Gum and Mud are. Wait, what kind of damage was this? Necrotic? Necrotic, he just said. I'm still raging. Let's try our listening ears, friends. Does rage help with necrotic? Let's see if it does anything with frighten. But didn't you say, did someone on Twitter say that frightening prevents? Beginning at sixth level, you can't be charmed or frightened while raging.

You said it was fire, right? Necrotic! But it was also fire, like flames. It was like a smoky thing. Yeah, because, you know, give to the Grondor Dragon, reactive resistance. Just take your damage. Fine. What was it, 32? Yes. That's if you have mindless rage. Do you have mindless rage, Gum-Gum? No, I just have regular rage. He has rage that he's got to see a therapist for. We have mindless rage at home. What primal path did you take? Did you take Path of the Berserker? No.

Okay, then that doesn't apply to me. So, yeah, it's if you had taken Path of the Berserker, at sixth level you get a feature called Mindless Rage that allows you to resist being charmed or frightened. Yeah, when you said I could, I was like, I didn't know that. Someone on the internet was asking questions about that, so we wanted to verify. You rolled 12d10s. So, 65 damage? Yes. If you had gotten a better roll on that, like,

Could have died. Yeah, 120. Oh, yeah, I'm a little disappointed. Could have been better. I just want to clarify something. You may say, Gus, that Mud is terrified, but I'm going to say you're in... Frightened. You're incorrect. Mud is absolutely enamored that he's looking at a dragon, and immediately, even after getting blasted with necrotic flames, does a little, like, pss, pss, pss, pss.

Like trying to get the dragon to come be his friend. Make an animal handling check. Yes! Can you become a dragon after this? No, that's why I like those two. Animal handling coming up. I get pretty good rolls on that. Where is it? There it is. You're going to have to make like a 30. How about a 20?

What's it going to roll against animal handling? Oh, it doesn't have to roll anything. Your psss are useless. It bites you. You die. It chonks your head off. While you're doing that, make the noise again. Oh, like a cat. Like you're trying to call it like a cat. It looks at you with just...

disdain in its eyes and it seems to like pop away out of existence. Dragon? Yes. What? Oh, good job, John. Oh, I mean, good job, bud. Yeah, you're welcome. Also, who's the lady? Inku. Yeah, I'm going to ride that dragon. Everyone make a perception check. Dragons.

gone yeah well i'm gonna ride it later though we're gonna see it again i'm gonna ride that dragon doesn't that mean drugs oh well no no i think it's like chasing the dragon 22. either way i'm gonna ride that 12. uh a very low one for mud guys got it 24. that's a oh 16. kyborg you have to like rub your eyes you can't believe what you're seeing but it's not it's not that the dragon disappeared it almost just sort of like

dissolved into shadow and smoke and then reformed like 50 feet to the side of where it was. It's moved into a flanking position with the party. It's a teleporting dragon. It's even cooler. Yeah, that's scary. Is this Inku lady in front of the dragon? She was riding it, wasn't she? The dragon appeared off kind of on a ridge and you look back to where Inku was and she's no longer standing there. She did a Batman. Do we know where she is? Make a intelligence check.

You want to save? Maybe an intelligent save? Aw man, it went from a 20 to an 8, to a 9. You don't know, she must have disappeared. That's crazy. Wow! Thank you! That's a cool trick. You do, however, see that Shadrow from earlier that was in the big room with Namito. You do see he is still there, roughing up Namito. Guys, I think we're out of our element. No, I refuse. I'm in my element. Okay, go ahead.

I don't know. What do we do? We're not in combat. What do you want from us? Oh, yeah. Go ahead. Who are you saying that to? I'm just saying I'm turning and just spinning around things. To the heavens? Yeah. We are the infinites. Can you do that? Hi, I'm Gum Gum. I don't think Chris has been listening to anything that's going on. This is totally a Gum Gum character. You hear a booming voice through the shadows. Just say. Oh. Wait, can I do a perception check? Is this that...

Oh, God. What's the one? The artist formerly known as... Entropa. Entropa. Yeah, no, no. Well, it's currently Entropa. It was when we met him, Armando. Armando. Yeah, no, but it was like the other guy's name. Jack. Archie. No, Archie. Thank you. That's an inspiration die for Barbara.

I already have one. Who are you trying to check? I don't understand what you're asking me. I heard death. Entropa. He wants to know if this is Entropa. Is it Entropa? He said it the worst way possible. Oh, no. Okay. Is it the dragon? You are the only one who can tell because you're the only one who sees that the dragon reformed. It's the dragon who said that.

Okay, alright. There's no way we can take this guy down. Guys, the dragon talks and Chris is- Gum-Gum is dying. Sorry. It's all the smoke. No, the dragon didn't talk. Yeah, it's in death. Is there anything else other than death you would like? I'm on my way to the gas station. Do you need me to pick up anything? You hear the whooshing of wings and the dragon comes and sets down right next to you, Gum-Gum. And it tries to take a bite out of you. Oh my god. Oh no. Should we be doing something right now? I think we should.

I feel like we should be doing something right now. Do something. It hits AC 34. You have onus to do whatever you want. I don't get to dodge or anything? What AC did you say? It's an attack roll. What are you talking about? Do you know how combat works? I thought you said 54. It started flying. I didn't get to react to it. Okay. All right. It hits me. Maybe if you'll listen for five minutes. We're listening. No one's listening. I heard everything you said. I thought he said 54. It bites you for... This dragon's tearing this family apart.

66 points of piercing damage. All right. I cast. No, no, I'm fine. I can cast spells. Plus 14 points of necrotic damage.

Okay, so that's 33 plus 14, so 47. I cast Summon Draconic Spirit. I gotta look that one up. You call forth the Draconic Spirit. It manifests an unoccupied space that you can see within this range. This corporeal form uses the Draconic Spirit stat block, and when you cast this spell, you choose a family of dragon. Chromatic, gem, or metallic. Oh, I'm a big fan of chromatic. This creature resembles a dragon of the chosen family. Uh.

- The creature disappears when it drops to zero hit points. So I made a dragon. - What kind? Chromatic, gem, or metallic? - I should have looked up what the difference between these dragons is prior to this. - Okay, while you think about that, I won't act or do anything. I will remind you that everything, like I said, looks very dark. It's very difficult to see here. Inku did disappear. You don't know where Inku went. - Is it difficult to see even with my Veronian goggles? - Yeah, 'cause it's not weather.

That's causing this. How about my dark vision? You do see that Shadrow beating up Namito, and you do see the portal that you stepped through is still shimmering behind you, where you exited from. Will you just peace out? Never mind. I don't summon a dragon. That's why I'm setting the stage a little more. Please strike that from the record, Your Honor. Stricken. Bye.

But I'm going to call a dragon at some point. Do you think we need to save this guy first? And then... Oh, could I... Get him, Gum-Gum! Could I... Yeah, I'll use my immovable rod. Teleport over to the guy that we're... The old guy. Whose name is? Nami-do. Hey! Nice. Nami-do. Nami-do. And then I'll handcuff him with...

With my friendship bracelets? You make him your friend. The good guy or the bad guy? I'm here to rescue you. And then, yeah, handcuff with my friendship bracelet. Is there... He's tethered to the other person? He's not tethered. No, the other person's been dragging him along. Okay.

then grab them and sprint towards the uh exit and cast the um warding bond with the old man we're gonna watch how that fails glorious what's the wording bone the spell wards a willing creature you touch and creates a mystic connection between you and the target until the spell ends while the target is within 60 feet of you it gains a plus one bonus ac and saving throws and has resistance all damage also each time it takes damage

you take the same amount of damage. The spell ends if you drop zero hit points or if your target becomes separated by more than 60 feet. It also ends if the spell is cast again on either connection, blah, blah, blah. Wait. How long have you had a defense buff and not used it on any of us? It's more recent. I only got it in my... It was an upgrade to his friendship bracelets. All right. Yeah, so immovable rod...

You can be able to get out there. I want to make a cool visual. Can I cast something too? Yeah, what do you want to cast? I cast Wall of Water. Oh, cool. Where and for what purpose? To split us and the portal from the dragon and Inku. Inku disappeared, but there is the other Shadrow there. Yeah, the other Shadrow. Oh, wow. Uncalled for. I can't believe you said that, Brian. Wow. Wow.

You know what, I've chosen that I think Kyborg needs to also be on the other side of this wall of water. Guys, guys, please. It's a 30-foot wide, 10-foot high, 1-foot thick wall of water. Okay. I will say, after you say "stinku," the dragon turns and snaps its head and looks at you and begins growling. No, no. My very own side of the young age. I'm very troubled youth. Please stop. Okay, yeah. You're able to go out there, slap your friendship bracelets onto Namito and begin making your way back. Oh yeah, you're able to make it back to the portal.

after doing that. - Thanks to a giant wall of water that's covering our escape. - A wall of water? It's a dark and angry water 'cause it's hard to see. - Yeah. - It's like a raging sea in wall form. - It's like dark waters. - Was it close? - Oh yeah, you barely are able to get through there.

Yeah. I know it's dark and kind of hard to see, but is there any way Bart could recognize if he remembers this place or like has any sort of recollection of what this is? That's a good question. Make a, let's call it a wisdom check. Oh, 19. Oh, that is pretty good.

What is your... Oh, you got a plus three on that. Oh, yeah, you're the one with the brains in the party. Ahem, I'm also high on wisdom. Do not lump me in with these... What's your modify or what's your wisdom? For wisdom? Yeah. It's like plus nine. I am also smart. It is because I got the die gems.

Oh, right, right. It's plus four. Sorry, saves are plus nine. Plus five. Yeah, it triggers a memory, something when you were young. You know, it's like trying to remember something that happened when you were a little kid. And it seems like maybe you remember this. Maybe you've been here. It's very hard to grab onto because it's something from so long ago. Could I tell if it's before I was in the orphanage? Yes. Okay. I'll say yes with an asterisk. You think so. It's hard to place that timeline. But in your memory, you believe it is. Interesting. Okay. Okay.

We go to the portal! You can fight the dragon if you want. We go to the portal! Bart just does a back dive into the portal. That's what you do like Homer going into the shrubs. That, but falling. Yeah, trust fall into the portal. I grab him so he doesn't hit his head when we go through. Who, Bart? Yeah. Oh, okay. Just cradle him right before he's about to hit it. I feel so safe in your arms. Trust fall accomplished. You all make haste back through the portal.

And as you do so, Gum-Gum, Namido slumps over onto the ground. He seems like he's very hurt. He's able to, you know, open his eyes and, you know, weakly mumble. Thank you for helping me. You're welcome. I'm Gum-Gum. Here, drink this. And I give him a healing potion. You all are taking no chances after that green dragonborn died the other episode. Yeah, pretty much. Yeah, roll some healing for Namido. Okay, 2d4 plus two. That's not much.

No, seven. That's all anybody really needs. Seven, got it. Yeah, just to open their eyes a little bit. Just a solid seven. Yeah, he seems a little better, but as you're giving him this potion, you notice that he has what seems like large blackened scars across his chest that look like they're pretty fresh. Can I do a medicine check? Sure. Nine. They look pretty...

Guys, it's not looking good. We need to get him. Gumbo does a medicine check. Is the portal still there? Uh, yes. Let's go. Back through? No way. Oh, okay. Is there any way we can close the portal? Cover it up? Are there books around? We can cover it up with books? Is there a sheet I can put over it? Bart, could you make another portal right next to it that takes them underground? I don't think I can make portals.

I could do a dimension door. That's what I'm saying, dimension door. That would take them like... I think it's only for me to transport myself. I don't think I could make a door. I think you have to carry it. I think it's the verbiage in dimension door. I think I could bring someone with me if they're equal or less than me. Everyone make a perception check. Okay. I was gonna... If the door stays open, I have an idea for how we can fool them. 19. Nat 20, 27. 16. 25.

Everyone hears a roar come through the portal. I pick up Namito and start heading to the exit of this building. If I take two pythons and then make a rope across, it'll trip them as they come out. Kyborg's doing that. I am leaving. Don't be so embarrassed they leave and go back through the portal.

Can I start running for the door as well? Yes, absolutely. I guess I'll run. I'll carry him too, by the way. Nope, I got him. He's also hanging. Well, I'm pulling gum. All right. Mo just has both of them. Wait, wait, wait. Hold on. Get in. Give us an out. Let's get the hell out of here.

No, no, no, no, I might be able to actually set a trap. Wait, I think I still have owls. That's what I'm saying. Get the hell owl of here. I don't. Casting Wall of Water would have broken it. Gotcha. Never mind, I don't have any arcane traps left. How many episodes can these owls travel through? No, I mean just like, how many can have the same spell in the same episode? Do you all go back out to the courtyard, I assume? Yeah. Where the combat was previously? Yes. And then I start screaming for our dragonborn friends in Draconic. I'd be like, it is approaching!

And how does that sound? Ready yourself. How about help? It's a borrowed word. Yeah. Yes. Namito says, oh, thank you so much. They attacked out of nowhere. He gives like a closer look at the party. You all don't look like you're from here. No.

I think I am. Kinda. Sorta. Maybe. Give your hand. And I lift him up and show Bart. Bart's just like a baby. I see. He gives you a wary look, Bart, and kind of stares at you. Well, I can look the other way in exchange for the help you have provided.

Racist? Namiro, where can we go that's safe? Like, where's a good stronghold where your defenses can protect us? Or a secret place. Here. Or a secret place. We are going to need help from the ancient dragons. Cool. Not that one we just saw through that portal, right? Definitely not. Okay. Where are they? There are three elders that you need to gather. Patch quest. Yeah. Esdream from Ashiko province. Wait, hold on.

This is in character. Bart, say that in character. I need to just make sure my memory is ready to go. Imagine Bart's like a little reporter with a flip pad. A little press thing in the hat. They lick the pencil. Okay, go ahead. Okay. You said S-Dream. S-Dream from Ashiko province. Ah, Ashiko. Yes. Not well. Shizu from Tsunam province. Oh, this is definitely Japanese. What province? Was it? Shizu. Province. From which province? Tsunam. Like tsunami without the I at the end? Tsunam province.

Got it. And Wanabe from Sora province. Sora? Yeah. Mud, you get all that? Sora from what? Sora province. Sora province. Tic Tac from Pish Posh province. Gobbly Cook from what province? Once we retrieve the elders, we can appeal for aid from the ancient dragons atop Mount Sayamoto.

Are they going to be as judgy as you about our race? I can help with that. Okay. He gives you a medallion. Ooh. A kyborg. This will convince them of your authenticity and the fact that I'm vouching for you. Cool. What's on the medallion? Yeah, what's the modifier? Why does he give it to kyborg? I speak Draconic. You don't. It's made of jade, and it does have an inscription written in Draconic. And I read it, and it says? It says, we breathe as one. Ah.

Ah. Ah. Wise words. Does it happen to have a dragon on it? Yes. Can I hold it, please? You get to do the cheat code thing. Please let me have it. So what's the cheat code thing? Just let me have it. But I want to alert the elders that the Shadrow have invaded our realm and are searching for something called the Paladians. Oh, yeah, we've never heard of those guys. I haven't either. I don't know what they're talking about. Yeah, crazy. Paladian? Yeah. Yeah.

I'm not a pirate. Yeah, the old lady from, no, the old man who was the last of his kind at the Bayou. Remember? The god? It was like we found the guy in the water. What was his name? Algaroc? Algaroc.

Al-Jarok said that you're a Palladian. Why am I a Palladian? Remind me, Gus. It was passed down to you by Al-Jarok before he diminished. Are we all Palladians or is it just mud? All of you are Palladians, but you're not supposed to tell anyone. It's a secret. It's like a secret order. We're defenders of the things that y'all got. Which are called? Oh, the Diogenes. There it is. They're defenders of the Diogenes. So we're like...

We're like Freemasons, but we're not a bunch of old white men. We're Illuminati. Yes. No. So we're looking for, just to recap what we've been told, we need to go talk to these three elders to get them to find us a Palladian? No. Have them appeal to the ancient dragons from Mount...

Sayamoto. Sayamoto. Correct. Namito does not appear to know what a paladine is. He said that's what the Shadrow are interrogating him looking for in this realm. And we're trying, and to prove who we are, we have this jade thing with the dragon. Right. Which says... We breed as one. There it is. We breed as one? Uh...

Okay, we'll leave you with your friends. There's so much information. Yeah, at this point, the other green dragonborn that you saved on your way here are running up and attending to Namito. What's up, guys? Good seeing you all again. Oh, ow!

Stop. We all saved your friend. We all saved him. We did equal work to save your friend. Oh, thank you. We would be lost without Namito. Okay, so we need... Namito says, Once you have found all the elders, you'll find me at the top of Mount Sayomoto. Do you have a map of the area, maybe? Maybe.

You can follow road signs to get to each district. How convenient. Or if you know anyone familiar with the area, perhaps they could guide you. Can we take one of your guards? Or has he got anybody up for grabs? Or Dr. Hen? Where is Dr. Hen? Oh, yeah, where? We left him on the ship. That's a good question. Yeah, Duncan came with you. He's hiding in one of the trees. Duncan's been here this whole time.

He's not a fighter. I get scared as I remember he's there. Duncan, cup of coffee, stat! Yeah, you got it. All right. What was the first place, Bart?

It was Ashiko. Oh, sorry. Namito was still saying something real fast before you do that. He was telling you that he's going to be out Matt Sayamoto preparing for everyone. He says, make sure you find everyone before sunset. Once the sun goes down, the Shadra will become too powerful. Oh,

This is imperative. So what you're saying is there's no chance for us to take a long rest. Oh, absolutely not. Oh, golly. Oh, I can help. Do you have any healing? Yes. I could do a mass cure wounds as well for us. What if we need less heal and we need more luckies and things? Because that's what I'm, that's what I'm going to be. You're going to have to rely on just playing normally. What about a short rest? Can we negotiate a short rest?

Every minute you waste gives the Shadreal more time to grow in power. Okay, okay, okay, stop it. What happened to your chest? And I assume right now it's like just the break of dawn, right? Like the first... Oh no, this is afternoon.

We're running out of time. Guys, what are we doing? We got to go. Bart casts. Yeah, can I cast Mass Cure Wounds on all my friends? Yes, absolutely. How much are you going to give us? Let me do it. Should I do it at a pretty high level? I don't want to waste my high level. I have 13 health, if that makes sense. Yeah, okay. You got bit. Let's do Mass Cure Wounds at the fifth level. Aw, dang. Which I think up to six creatures. So could I choose all my friends, myself, and...

Nemedo? Yeah, why not? Yeah, and even one more if you want. We need him to be healthy, yeah. 3d8 plus 4, that is a 19. Oh, nice. So everyone gets 19 points. I use Mud's Totem of Restoration, which Micah is so happy I'm finally using this item that he made. It takes the shape of any creature you desire and acts as a spellcasting focus. And I make it turn into an anteater.

What does it do? Yeah, what is it? That's the tongue. The dragon's back. Run. Run. Oh, and I can cast...

Healing spirit or lesser restoration? What does healing spirit do? Let's find out, everyone together. The clock is ticking. I know. D&D healing spirit. Well, if a round is like six seconds, this is only taking like one second. True. You call forth the nature spirit to soothe the wounded. The intangible spirit appears in a space that is five foot cube. You can see within range. The spirit looks like a transparent beast or fae. It looks like... A transparent anteater. No, the totem's an anteater. Oh. And then I cast a healing spirit, and it looks...

Like a pangolin. Oh, nice. A penguin? Pangolin. Pangolin. Pangolin? It's like a Asian armadillo. Yeah, got spiky. Ooh, cute. I think they're from China? Oh, they're like little dragon tanks.

Those guys are cool. That's cute. If you walk into the thing, it'll give you 1d6 of hit points. It lasts a minute. How long is a... Ooh, they're also in Africa. Sorry. Stop. I'm looking up pangolins now. I'm a big pangolin guy now. If I want to play the math right, how long is a... Is 10 seconds an action? 6 seconds is a round. So in a minute of how this long lasts, people could do

do this 10 times. Yeah. So everyone can roll 10d6. Wow. Wow. Is that cool? And you can have that health. I feel like I shouldn't have bothered with my... I think with him, with the dying little lad here. 10d6. Yeah, as long as everyone... It looks like as long as everyone huddles up by it and waits for a minute. I cuddle it.

All right, 10d6. Do we roll one? I rolled a lot of ones. I got a 13. 34. I got a 35. So we each roll our own? Yeah. How many was it again? 10d6. Hey, I'm full health. Okay, Gum Gum still needs heals. I'm like half health, but if we took a short rest, I could probably heal. We can't, we can't. I'm going to give you, you're so far away from me. You're so far away, and I need to give you a potion of healing stats.

And the only thing I have is my Brubo. It's my Brubo. So I got to shoot you. I got to do it. I'm going to take the shot. Take the shot. I take the shot. What do I do? I'm looking it up. Aren't we all close to each other, though? No, he's so far away. I can't. Bart, time is of the essence. I thought we huddled around. Brubo, there it is. Yes, and at this point, he wants to shoot the boy with an arrow.

Yeah, so make an attack roll like with a with a brew bowl with him. Wait, is it actually gonna damage him? Just do it! Well, no, this it's specially designed just to launch a potion that explodes upon impact. Close my eyes and open my mouth. Gum gum's fading! Uh, uh, uh, okay, here we go, here we go. Open wide! Ah!

It's an add 20, 31! I just get smacked in the face with a potion. Make a dex check, Gum-Gum. A check? Yeah, this will make sense in a second. That's a four. That's actually good. So you fire with such precision that the brew bowl goes straight into Gum-Gum's mouth while his eyes are closed. Oh.

Gum Gum's unable to dodge out of the way, and the potion pours straight into his mouth, and the empty bottle falls to the ground. And I just swallow it like that? Wow. So it just shoots the liquid? It shoots the whole potion, and the container falls. So does it go, thump, grab your mouth, you drink, and that just pops right down? Yeah, it's like you did a shot. So roll for healing. Yes.

It's a potion of healing. So 2d4? Yeah, plus whatever. Thank you, that's six. Yeah, make sure you deduct that potion from your inventory. Alright, just did. We've got some health. I'm up to 73. You're welcome. Of 137. You're welcome, my friend. I know I did a lot. I know we all equally contributed much to your health.

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And as always, if you post on social media, use hashtag StinkyDragonPod. We might name an NPC in the show after you.

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All right. Are you all ready to get going? I think with that, I am ready. I asked him what happened to his chest. Oh, Ladoria. Who? The dragon. Oh, Ladoria is the big dragon. Ladoria the Exploria? Any tips on fighting them? Tips? Run. Okay. Bye. Yeah, I don't think there's ever a situation we could fight that thing. But we could befriend it.

And he tipped on fighting these night house things in general. He hit them with the pointy side. All right, bye-bye. All right, we head off and Duncan sends us which direction. Duncan, get on my back. Oh, yeah, good idea. He's healthy, he's fine. Yeah, but he's lazy too. He's baby. In a Stinky Dragon record, I have 13 PDFs open today. So if it takes me a second to load, I'm kind of just going through them. Okay, Horcrux.

Where are y'all going first? The first place. To, uh, uh, S'Dream from Ashiko Province? No, the dragon's name is S'Dream. Okay. It's Ashiko Province. So we're going to Ashiko. All right, so you're going to head to Ashiko Province, which is luckily for you not too far away. Uh, you head in that direction, courtesy of Duncan pointing, but you're able to verify via the, uh, road signs that are written in draconic, courtesy of Kyborg. Okay.

I helped. Everyone's being so courteous. As you get closer, it seems like the village is very much painted in like orange and reddish hues. Then as you drive in closer, you realize that it's not paint, it's fire. Oh, we're dumb if we thought that was paint from far off. The entire village is just covered in an orange glow. Does it look like it's not a control fire or is this like just the vibe? Oh yeah, as you drive even closer, you can see there are little pockets of darkness.

All around. And a lot of the buildings are on fire. It's just like a hellscape. It's not great. Is there potentially a building within sight that looks like it would be the important central part of the city? Or, yeah, one... Town hall. One that looks similar to the one that we broke into that had the other elder in it?

Yeah, yeah. Not necessarily. In this town, you see one, two, three, about five different buildings, three to the left, two to the right, that are all in various states of burning. In fact, right outside of the first building on your left, when you enter the village, you have to cross a bridge, cross a small river to get to the village.

and after you cross the bridge the first building to your left right outside of it you see a little red dragonborn boy standing there crying okay all right you can't speak draconic i'm gonna run up and help okay he just stares at you gum gum i i translate and i very in my most tender tone to not scare him ask him how he's doing what's your tender tender draconic tone i say

I was really hoping you'd go... Alright, you got me. You got me. Do you have a... I gotta start. We gotta start using our inspiration dice. Yeah, Ben suggested giving you one for that. His head snaps to you, Kaiborg, and he says that his house is on fire, but that his pet, Jin, is still inside. I don't even say...

What kind of pet is it? It's the best pet, a rabbit. I run in there. I run in there. I run in there. I go to save the pet. I call back to Gum Gum. I say, take care of him. I'm going to go get his pet rabbit. Okay, bye-bye. Hey, ask Duncan. Ask him if he knows where the elder is. He says, yeah, of course. His mom's right next door. There's your answer. Why would this kid necessarily know where this elder is?

Just hopes. I mean, he's the only person we've been referring to. First person we met. Hey, do you know the answer to this thing we're looking for? How does Kyborg do with rescuing a rabbit? You know, you step inside the burning building and, you know, beams are falling. Lots of things are on fire. You realize it's a two-story building. You have to make an investigation check to see if you can find the rabbit. Okay.

- All right, my rabbit senses are tingling. Where is investigation? - Gotta find my investigation check. - This is not good. - That's a two. Inspiration die. - Okay. - Are you using it already? - Yes. This rabbit is important. I used to own rabbits. Rabbits are very important to me. - Oh. - Nine. - You or kyborg? - Me. Wait, what do you mean? - Blaine or kyborg? - Both. I actually used to own two rabbits, Fluffy and Bugs. - Oh, that's a great name. - Yeah, you're having trouble finding it. There's just so much smoke, it's making it really difficult to see.

Oh, and it's so hot. Uh, you take 6.6 points of fire damage. Gift of the Chromatic Dragon! Reactive resistance. I, uh, I fire, uh, you know, infuse myself so that I can have resistance to fire. Maybe that'll help with my checks. Could I cast, uh, control flames? I can cast it three times for three instantaneous. No, I can cast it three times consecutively. And what does that do?

I can extinguish a five-foot cube of flames. So let's say, like, that's 15 cubic feet of flames in this house I extinguished just to maybe help his check. Oh, yeah, absolutely. You're able to do that, and I would say that that would give Kyborg advantage on an investigation check. Yeah. Tell it for the rabbit. Gumum, do you maybe want to ask Duncan to see if you could ask these people specifically about the name of the person we're looking for? S-Dream.

maybe they'll know or like be able to recognize that name? Uh, sure. I will get to that in just a second. That's a great idea. I rolled a six and 19, 19. Yeah. You see the rabbit is at the top of the stairs, uh, on the second story, but it seems like there's a big burning beam blocking the way between you and him. How are you going to get her? Oh, you have a reactive resistance, right? Yes. Uh, what does that do? Does that make you immune or, uh,

When you take acid, cold, fire, lightning, or poison damage, you can use reaction to give yourself resistance to that instance of damage. I'm going to hurdle this beam. Okay.

Yeah, you jump over it. You would take some damage, but I guess you're going to use your reactive resistance to negate that. How much was it? Let me roll it. You would take five points of burning down. I'll take that as well. I need to hold on to this for later. All right. But now you're on the other side. Are you going to hop over again to come back? No, I'm going to jump out a window. Oh! Yeah, so you all watch Kyber go into the house as it's aflame. The beams fall down and the first floor is totally crushed by fire and ash. And as that happens,

Out of the second story window, Kyborg jumps out with a rabbit in hand. There's a guitar riff, and then I go... Right? Right, Micah? I'm just blinking at you. You're trying to catch him? Yeah. Yeah, make a strength check. That was a nat one. Oh, yeah, you try to catch... I cast Gust. What does that do? I make a little pocket of air to the cushion they're falling. I do have a... I have boots.

I like how you're just wasting spell slots. These are cantri- these are, uh, cantri. I have the ring of jump, by the way, so that might help with my landing. That helps her up. That lands with- that helps with downsies? No. No? No. Well, jump, not land. Yeah, so, uh- Oh, you need a ring of land on the other hand? You jump out the window without- obviously without a very good plan, but luckily a giant gust of wind catch dude pops you up at the last second and you land gracefully on your feet. What do I do? I just trip?

Yeah. You're still waiting with your arms out. Okay, look, I'm ready. And I'm sorry, Barbara, you asked Duncan to ask what? If this, I guess this little boy knows who, is it Estream or Sedream? Estream. Estream is. He says, no, he has no idea, but my name is Lynn. Lynn?

I make a small, like, harness slash leash from some rope that I have. Maybe extra clothes for making. No, it's like, it's not that hard to just tie it together. I was like, I'm in the middle of talking to this boy and then Kyborg does it again. But continue. I'd say

Saved his rabbit, so maybe that's gonna help him a little bit with persuasion. So anyways, I gave him back his rabbit and I gave him the leash because I know how wily rabbits can be. And I say, here you go, Lynn. Oh, a rabbit leash. I thought it was for the boy. Oh no. He grabs the rabbit. Oh, and he says, thank you. He says, I'll never lose Jin again. Nice. Cool. Lynn and Jin. Your mother... Stop it. Your mother is where? You said another house?

Next door. He points at the building next door, which is also on fire.

So you had to save your rabbit before your mom? Priorities. He's a little kid. I don't think, you know, when you have, when you're so young, you think your parents can do anything. Yeah. It's like, you don't worry about them. But a helpless rabbit. Right. It's like, but his rabbit, it's his, it's his responsibility. I run to the other house. Yeah. Outside the other house is a burly, or the next building, I should say, is a burly female dragonborn who appears to be trying to douse the flames engulfing this building.

I do the control flames thing again and help. Okay, she's trying to control the flames, but all she has are blankets and you're able to control flame to kind of push them aside. And she says, thank you, but can some of you help me get some water from the river? She points at the river you all just crossed to help put this fire out. Did you have like

of like a water yeah I do I do create water and I create up to 10 gallons of water or and that I can make the waterfall as a as rain in a 30 foot cube that's what oh that's I could do shoot ice arrows I could use my like one use of my rain bringer staff but I'd probably say that if you can make water

I can make a lot of water. I can make water as well. Kyborg unzips his pants. Stop, stop. I'm helping! All right, so you all start making water rain down to try to extinguish the fire? And I'm singing. Let the rain fall down. Here we go. Sweet.

The water starts slowly causing the fire to diminish until it's fully extinguished. And the red dragonborn turns and says, Thank you so much. You saved my business. Oh, what's the business? She points at the sign. Breeze Tea Shop. What?

Tea. Tea's good. We also saved your life, did we not? She was outside. Yeah, she wasn't inside. We saved your kid's rabbit as well. Oh, Jin? Yes. Where was that rabbit? Second floor. He didn't go inside, did he? Rear bedroom. I got him. Yeah, at that point, Jin walks up too. I'm sorry. Lin walks up. Do you want to ask the same question? Lin is the mom? Yeah, Lin is the boy. Jin is the rabbit. Mom is. Mom is. What's your name? Bree's Tea Shop. I'm Bree. Bree Tea. B-R-I, by the way.

Oh, like the cheese. Well, yeah, almost. There's an E. Yeah. There's just B-R-I. Do you know where Estream is? Oh, Estream. Does she understand us? You can, I assume you're either going through Kyborg or Duncan to get the translation. I feel like you're phoning that one in now.

Save his voice. Sounds like you're drowning. It does. She says, that's his home right over there and points across the courtyard where the fountain is. Before you say anything else, it's not on fire, is it? It's

It's on fire. God, dog, come on! I cast another act of create water and rain water on the house. What's the range on that? I walk up to it. Okay, yeah, I'm just trying to convey it's like it's a bit of a distance across the courtyard. 30 feet is the distance, just to tell you. You would have to get closer. You're probably 90 feet away or so at this point. Yeah, I'll go with... I think we all walk that way because this is who we're looking for. Yeah. I give Lynn a thumbs up and I say, stay cool. Okay.

He just smiles. And Brie says, Wow, I just want to be just like him when I grow up. And Brie says, Thank you again. And waves as y'all are walking off. Blah, blah, blah.

That's draconic fur. No problem. Oh, I couldn't understand. Yeah, so you walk up and again, like I said, this building is also on fire and you try to start extinguishing it again, Mud, as you walk up? I do it. It says it extinguishes exposed flame. Okay. Yeah, the flames start dying down, but you see, you can't really see anything from outside. I'll run in. What if we cautiously went in? I guess as it fires out. Okay. Yeah. I cautiously run in.

Cautiously run in. I might have some broken floorboards and stuff. Yeah, you go inside and it's a two-story building. When you cautiously run inside, you don't notice anything immediately when you first go in. Who went in other than GumGum? I'm going to ring of jump to the second floor. Oh, make me a perception. Actually, make an investigation check. Me or? Kyborg. Jump. Two. Okay. Yeah.

Yeah, uh, you ring of jump into the second floor? Aha, yeah. Alright, yeah, you, uh, jump through an open window into the second floor, and you see a wrinkled red dragonborn who seems to be cowering in fear in one of the corners, as well as that shadrow which you had previously seen, uh,

this guy gets around i i uh use my longbow of crystallina and i say uh on s stream no on the shadrow and i say forever winter oh is it fine is that cool with you yeah yeah yeah yeah i'm waiting for you to continue yeah yeah yeah i'm not stopping you okay 26. that's okay and then i do nine damage plus

because they're a sworn enemy. 46 pull damage. That's 19.

And then I'm just going to keep plugging arrows. So we got three turns of this. So I'm going to keep going. That was, uh, yeah. 19 points on that one. Okay. That one, you know, zips towards him and hits him. But at the last second, he catches it and throws it right back at you. No, I forgot about this move. God, so nauseous. You should stop shooting this man. Do I have dexterity or anything that I can do to, uh, I got to make a roll here to see if it's going to work or not.

While this is happening, can I also come into the building and... Yeah, you're downstairs with GumGum? Yeah, meet up with them up here. Smart. C6. What does that mean? He just catches it and tries to throw it back at you, but misses. Okay. And then he retreats into one of those portals like you saw previously. Not with Estream though, right? No.

Okay, I pull out the jade amulet and I say, "We read this one." We gotta go. The wrinkled red dragonborn lets out a small yelp and then runs to another corner of the room trying to hide from you. Mud, you're outside and Bart and Gum-Gum, you're on the first floor. Yes. And only Kyborg's on the second floor.

And I guess I'll... Do we see anything on the first floor? No, there's like a living area, many books. I send Duncan in. Could I also go upstairs? Yeah. Can we go upstairs? I'm staying outside. Sure. Bart and Gum-Gum arrive upstairs along with Duncan. And you see a red dragonborn trying to hide and cower in the corner from Kyborg. I catch them up on what happened. I say that there was the Shadrow. He went away in a portal. This guy scared me because I said we breathe as one. All you make a perception check. Four. Yikes.

Nine. That's a low one for Bart. I'll go two. That's an eight for me. Ooh, okay. What does Dunkirk roll? Oh, yeah. Dunkin'. Dunkin'.

Let's get Christopher Nolan on this. I don't know why I said that. Dunkirk? Oh, Duncan looks at the dragonborn and says, It looks like he's shivering. Cold? There's a fire. Not anymore. Or shivering because he's scared. Or because I shot a cold arrow at him. Does he seem hurt? It seems like there's something affecting him. I'm not sure what. Oh, can I do pull up my boomba? Show me the magic.

And you cast. I'm going to say it like Jerry Maguire. Show me magic. So stupid. This show is so dumb. I do magic awareness. Yeah. You detect a magic affecting the dragonborn. It appears to be some kind of illusion magic. Oh.

Illusion magic effect. That's making him cold? That's making him afraid. He's terrified of us. Is there anything else in the room that's doing magic? Um, the usual caveat, you, your party, everyone, uh, but nothing beyond that. Don't you have dispel magic, Mud? I do. He's magic. He's afraid. I'm outside. Oh, right. Uh, the wrinkled red dragonborn is still like cowering away beneath a window overlooking the river. Where's he looking? He's staring at all of you. Uh,

Can I grab him and cover his eyes? That's the way to calm someone down. He might run away. Maybe Mud should come in here to dispel the magic. Could I yell out the window? Mud, you scared guy up in here and you need to dispel some magic. Sure. I got limitless ones of those. I do not. But I go in and I cast it at the third level because I'm running out of spell slots. Okay.

let me see the any spell third level or lower on the target ends if it's fourth level or higher there's a check yeah you cast dispel magic the dragonborn seems to like blink and kind of shake something off and then looks at you and says oh wow thank you

I don't know what came over me. You're welcome. What were you seeing? I felt like I was trapped in an avalanche of snow. Oh, I've been there. Kind of the opposite. There was fire. There was fire? Yeah, you're being attacked by a Shadrach. Who are you people? What are you doing in Tatora? We are the Infinites, and we're gathering you and the other two elders so that we can go to...

Mount Saimodo! Cause we gotta summon a big ol' dragon? We gotta talk to the ancient dragons. How do you know all of this? We talked to- Oh shoot. Namido. Namido. Uh, we breathe as one! And I show him the amulet. The jade amulet. Oh! I start breathing heavily. Yeah. Namido sent you? Then it must be dire. It's very dire. Everything's on fire.

Have you ever seen The Wire? What's Nami-Do's plan? Your help we require. We gotta go to the mountain. Mount... Yeah, we... The Shadros have invaded and they're looking for the Palladians. Palladians. Palladians. What is...

We don't know what those are either. And I grin. I don't know. We don't know. I think they're the defenders of the Daiha Gems. What's that? They're probably hot. Well, I'll head to Mount Sayamoto and meet Namido. Do you know where we could maybe find Shizu and Winabe? In the Sudom province and the Sora province. Okay. But any, like, help on how to find them once we get there? Which one's closest?

If I were you, I'd head to the Sunam province and you can find Shizu's home. They should be there. Gotta load that map. One moment. You maybe have like a cell phone number for him instead? This is a great episode. I'm having so much fun. Full fetch quest, going around towns. This is fun. I love you guys. I attack Kyborg.

Once you enter Sunam Province, you'll find Shizu's home if you head left. Once you enter, veer to the left and stick to the left side, second building on the left. You got it. I can do that. You like school enough. What about Winneby? What about...

When you get there, Wannabe will most likely be in the large temple in Sora Provenance. Alright, I don't suppose you have any healing potions in your house that we could take? Oh, I do! I have plenty. Yay! Follow me. He goes downstairs. I hope they're not burnt. Yeah, and then he opens up a large chest, but it's all ash and charred. Oh, well, I did.

Guess they got burned. We're going to boogie. Do you have like a special guard or people that you trust that can escort you to Mount Sayamoto? Absolutely. I'll get there immediately. They're not like your healing potions, right? Scorch. Oh, no. I hope not. I'll go find them. As we exit, could I yell to...

Gen 3. And be like, do you happen to have any healing potions or healing items in your tea shop? I have lots of tea. Do they have healing properties? They make you feel warm. Okay, thanks, thanks. Maybe we should have given that guy some of that. I know there's a fire. Here's a nice hot glass of tea. Also, you didn't yell that. I had to yell that for you. Draconic.

Oh, did she speak common? Uh, I'll say no. Okay. We had two, so many names, so many names this episode. Sora province for wannabe? There we go. Or do we want to get to the other one first? No, Shizu. We're going to Shizu. Sorry. We need to get to Shizu first. And the Hapomeranian. Yes. Shizu, we're going to who? Shizu in the Tsunam province. Oh, Shizu is the, in the Tsunam province. Sorry.

This will all be on the midterm. Uh... Election? I'm not sharing my notes. Listen, I'm writing these things down because I actually was able to help just... Jesus Christ. My apologies. Please cut that. Please turn that into a song.

I speak Draconic now. Tsunam province, here we come! Alright, it's not too far of a walk to get to the Tsunam province. As you arrive, there's a small river that you just need to wade through in order to... It's just not very deep. You need to cross in order to enter the Tsunam province. Good part on my shoulders.

How about you ask? Consent is... Art, would you like to ride on my shoulders? Happy. Okay. Directly in front of you, you see a well, and then the path forks to the left and the right, and there's various buildings in each direction. Well, we gotta go to the second building on the left. So we're going right. And is there anything on fire? You don't see anything on fire. No. Any shadows? Shadrows? Make a perception check. Woo!

Show me the magic. Eight. Twelve. Nothing that seems out of the ordinary so far. Wait, why did you make a perception check? Oh, I thought it was like a... No, it was just I asked him. He was asking a question. Yeah. Nothing that seems out of the ordinary so far. Eight.

Is there anything special with this well that looks noteworthy? I will say now make me a perception check, GumGum. Five. Unless you want to use my other one. No, I want to use this one. No, it just seems like a well. I flick a coin inside and I make a wish. Ow! Oh, is someone up there? Help! Oh my god! Oh!

Uh, what do you, who, who's down there? Are you, are they draconic? Uh, yes. All right. Uh, you look over and you see, uh, an elderly female silver dragonborn down at the bottom of the well. Can I lower the bucket? That's their name. Uh, what's your name? Um, Magon. Uh, please help. Okay. Uh, I lower some rope. All right. Can I, can I do the bucket? There is a rope nearby, but it's tied up into knots.

Oh, that's perfect. Then they get to help. It's not long enough, though, because it's been tied up. You're going to need to untie it. How far down are they? At the bottom of the well. Can we see? Yeah, you saw an elderly female silver-born dragon. Like, depth-wise, like, how far do we... Oh, I see what you're saying. You would estimate it's probably, like, 40 feet or so. All right. I have a rope. Can I do it with a rope? Sure, sure. Yeah, I take Gum-Gum's rope. Thank you, Gum-Gum. And I lower it down, and I have...

Me and Gum-Gum help her up. Or I was saying I go down and carry because she's elderly. She's elderly. She's going to need some help. You're stronger than I am. I'll admit it. You go down. Okay, yeah, yeah, yeah. I go down there and I scoop her up. I'm guessing I'm not still on your shoulders. No, no, no. This is all happening while Bart's there. Bart's there too? Yes. Right before Kyborg hops down the well, Bart hops off his shoulders. I would imagine we use the rope like against the...

Pulley. The pulley thing. Is Bart claustrophobic? No, he just thinks that Kyborg doesn't need the extra very heavy weight of Bart. I like the challenge. Yeah, Kyborg goes down and pulls up the Dragonborn. And as you all come out, Kyborg and the Dragonborn, you realize that you're covered in like a black ink. Oh. Ink, ew. Ew.

Somebody's poisoned the water hole. That was good. Megan says, oh, no, this is our well for ink. It's our reservoir of ink for calligraphers. Why were you down there? How big is this well of ink? How many calligraphers do you have? A standard well. She says, oh, I don't know how I got down there, actually. She looks at you all and says, wait, who are you all? You aren't from here. We

We're the Infinites. Uh, you guys are being attacked by the Shadrow, and we're here to help by assembling the Three Elders.

including S-Dream, Shizu, and Wannabe. We were sitting here. Wannabe. We were sitting here by Namido. Oh, well, that makes sense. Yeah, where's S-Dream? We already found S-Dream. We're looking for Shizu. There you go. Who's in the second building on the left, according to S-Dream. Distracted by this well. Megan points at the second building, the one that you would have suspected. It's a rather large building. It says right over there.

Are you okay? Yeah, how'd you fall in? Yeah, she doesn't know, but are you okay? I don't know. I think so. I feel fine. You just don't remember?

I don't remember. Do like a perception check to see if something she's like. Show me the magic! Okay. No magic radiates from her. Why don't you come with us? Are those amnesias here? Let's go. You want to join us? We're going to go say Shizu. You want to come with us? I'd much rather go home and clean off. Okay. Good.

Go do that. Do you need an escort? Yeah. Oh, no, my home's right over there. She points on the other side from the well. I just need to walk right across the path here. Hmm.

Okay. This is an odd encounter. It is. As she's going, could Bart just watch her, make sure she gets into her house? Yeah, it's not very far. It's 25 feet or so. She just has to cross a small path and walk into a building. And yeah, she walks through the building. No problem. Okay. All right. Let's go see Shizu. That was a very normal meeting of a person. Something's off, though. She didn't remember, and I wonder why. We can ask Shizu. He might know. It seems like he's a... They. Yeah, I have not specified. Yeah.

Thank you, John. Yeah, you turn around and start making your way over to Shizu's house. Everyone go ahead and make me a perception check. 10. 21. 12. Destined 18. Bart and Mud, as you're crossing the path to head over to Shizu's home, you notice off to your right, there's a small, very idyllic pond.

But for some reason, you notice it looks like it's frozen solid. Is it cold in this environment at all? No. Is the door or anything frosty? Oh, no. This is like a pond off to the side. But no, the door first. No, no, no. When I did my show, show me the magic, I see magic within 60 feet. Yeah. Did I see anything else? No.

Is there anything in the pond? Wait, no, we're not by the pond. It's just like down the path a little more to the right. But it's frozen. Yeah. And actually now, who had the Hyrule? Bart. Now that you look closer, you see that it looks like there's a dragonborn stuck in the pond. Oh my gosh. Could I use my, I think I have a potion of fire breath. Hey. And use it on the pond to like melt it. Ooh, that's pretty cool.

Excuse me. Yeah, absolutely. You use your potion of fire breath. And that has three charges, and I just used the first one. Nice. And the water begins to melt, and it's a short male silver dragonborn who was trapped in the frozen pond. And he begins moving, and is free, and begins wading out of the pond over to you all. He says, thank you so much. Or it helps pull him out. Oh, he appreciates it. He says,

What?

Forced to do what? He was forced to use freezing breath and freeze me into the pond. Oh. Where is he? Did you also see this guy push an elderly woman down an inkwell by any chance? They put someone in the well? Yeah, maybe. It's okay. She's well. What was your name? What was your name again? I hate it.

Uh, Magon. He says, uh, he's in a building right over here and he points to the building right across the street. That's the third building on the left, the one next to Shizu's home. Are we getting distracted? I feel like we are, but we should just keep pulling this thread. I mean, we gotta find out what's going on. Yeah. Sure.

Should we split it up? Approach the house and perceive what I perceive. What do you mean approach the house? That's like you're trying to perceive from the outside? Which house? The third on the left. Yes. Second on the left. Third on the left is where the boyfriend is. Correct. Partner. Partner. I go to that house. I joined. Ryan, you said you want to perceive, but I was asking, like, how are you perceiving? Like, what does that mean? I'm looking at it. Oh, you're looking at it?

It's just a pretty run of the mill, like straw thatched roof house. Nothing seems extraordinary about it. I knock on the door. You knock on the door and you hear a very weak, help. I'm going to bust down the door. And I bust down the door. You bust down the door and you see another silver dragonborn who's being restrained by a Shadrow. Is it the same Shadrow from earlier? My mortal enemy? No, it's a different one. Okay. Bonus action. Forever winter. You are my mortal enemy. And I take some attacks.

Oh god, they're gonna throw the arrows back at you! I don't know why you keep doing the same thing. What's the definition of idiocy? Insanity. That's it. 12 plus 46. 16. Yeah, there you go. Um, the Shadrow catches it but is unable to throw it back at you. The arrow flies right at them but, uh, snatches it out of the air and just tosses it to the ground. I'm gonna keep shooting arrows until you shoot back, back I say! Shoot another arrow. Why?

They can only do it once. You don't know that. Well, we're going to test it out. Imagine that hit. It's 22, 7, plus 13, 22.

Uh, yeah, this one hits the Shadrow. Uh, the Shadrow does not react and seems to be able to catch this one. So it hits and plants itself doing 20 points. What is that? Like seven from the arrow? What's the 13? Seven is, uh, yeah, standard piercing damage. And then 13 is ice damage. Oh, okay. Yeah, the Shadrow grunts in pain and jumps out one of the windows on the eastern side of the building. Attack of opportunity!

Side away. You all approach from the west and it jumps out the other side. You don't get an attack of opportunity. Well, okay. Here's the thing. Longbow, Crystalino, when I declare that they're my enemy ranged attacks, it doesn't, I don't have any disadvantage. So they could just run as far as they want. I'm going to still plug them. That's that. The Lada does not dictate that.

That's not how that works. Okay, well, whatever. I still want to shoot an arrow. Okay, you shoot another arrow. You can still see him. We can start talking about this guy. I can see Barbara's head in her hand, but I still want to take a shot at this guy. Screw it. I failed that. Okay. All right, let's continue on. What are we doing? How did you fail it? Tell me. I got a one. Oh.

Yeah, the bowstring snaps. You're going to need to restring that bow. Okay, fine. Restring my bow. So he jumps out a window? Yeah. Like towards us? On the opposite side of the building. We didn't hear it. Yeah. I don't know if you hear it. It just jumped out a window. Oh, was it? There wasn't glass? No.

Okay. Okay, go ahead. The restrained dragonborn is still there. Uh, and then Bax runs in as well with you and says, oh, thank you. He runs up and begins, uh, untying his partner. Wait, this isn't Shizu? No. Oh, Jesus Christ. Oh, um, no, I'm Weyato. Uh, Shizu lives in the next house. Okay. What made you cast, uh, that cold breath to freeze your partner under that lake? The

The Shadrow was threatening to kill him if I didn't do it. Oh. Romance. Oh my gosh. Do you guys happen to have any healing potions in this house? Oh my god! They give him the pamphlet asking for healing potions. Or anything to help us on our quest to save the elders. I'm just specifically asking for potions. I'm afraid not. We don't keep anything like that on hand here. Shizu may have something though. Alright.

Really quick, do you guys know anything about Megan? We found her stuck in the inkwell and she seemed a little disoriented. Why was she in the inkwell? I don't know. We got her out though. Is she okay? Like, does she just kind of have a memory thing going on or what's up with that?

Maybe the Shadrow did that to her. That sounds really unusual. Okay. This better result in something. They're just making chaos. Yeah. They really are. Head to the Shizu's house and put my ear to the door. Make a perception check. Love to, my good friend Gustavo. I smack you on the butt. 17. That really bolsters your confidence. Okay. You're welcome.

you don't thank you you don't hear anything at the very least maybe like some muffled talking everyone stand back

I'm gonna do something insane. I'm gonna try magic. I try the doorknob. Whoa! The door is unlocked. And it opens. Crime of opportunity right there. I clap. Crime of opportunity. Gotta keep your doors locked. Go inside. You open the door and step inside and you see all along the floor are shards of ice sticking up like stalagmites. Cool. I step around them. Okay.

Does everyone else go in or? Could I use another spell of my fire breath potion to melt him? Oh yeah. I don't, I wait. I wait for the fire breath. Hold on. Bart puts a hand in front of mud and uses his potion of fire breath to go and does it all around the room. It's like it's our smallest member stopping our biggest member saying, I got this. It's like, what's it called when it's like mom hand when you're driving. Yeah. Come to a really quick stop and you put your arm in front. Can you burp afterwards?

Yeah, all of the ice stalagmites melt. Everyone make me a... Well, I guess who walked in? Mud, Bart. I now walk in. I was thinking... Just answer the question, please. Who walked out? I was going to jump in. I walk in. The stuff is melted now. I walk in. Okay. Mud and Bart make a perception check.

Another one? Let's say 14. 20 T. Nice. Mud, you realize that the voices you hear are from above you. You look above you and you realize the voices are coming from near the ceiling and you see that Shadrow from earlier holding by the throat a beautiful silver dragonborn. Like floating? Yeah, floating in the air. And you hear the silver dragonborn say, I don't know, maybe the Sora province. And then the dragonborn gets dropped and the Shadrow disappears. I catch...

the dragonborn so is this the same shadra that had the arrow in it from kyborg this is the one this is like the fancy one okay no not the one with the one that had no no no okay you said you try to catch the dragonborn oh i don't try make a strength check i do scratch your butt and he said maybe sora which is the location that the wunabe is in that's an 11. yeah it's not graceful uh but you're able to catch this silver dragonborn i never said mud was graceful

And the dragonborn says, Oh, thank you so much, but you have to hurry. They are going to Soar Province. Well, we need you to go to Mount Sayamoto. We were sent here by Namido. What? Why? I hand the pamphlet. I show them the amulets and I say, We breathe as one. We're trying to summon the ancient dragon. Oh, that makes sense. Namido's the smart one. That's smart. Yeah. So am I. My name's Skyborg.

Roll an intelligence check. No, roll deception. Oh, okay.

okay. I guess I can do that. This makes sense. This is Shizu, right? Shizu, yeah. Shizu, yeah. Is it Shizu? The dragonborn has not said that, but you're assuming. This is Shizu's house. What's your name? I'm Shizu. Ah, it's a lovely name. Is that a family name? Make sure you hurry. They are headed to Sora province. That's a bit rude. What are they going to do there? They're looking for something called the Palladiants. Oh, weird. Never heard of those. I hate those. Wait,

Wait, Shizu's... Is Shizu an elder? That's Shizu. Yes. Okay. Just making sure. You said she was, like, real pretty and stuff, so I was like, well, yeah. There's nothing wrong with that. She'll be old and pretty. Not exclusive. Well, you know, I mean, I thought you were, like... What was Elise's character? You know, the little shrimp lady. Anyway, sorry. Go ahead. We're going to go to Sword Province. Post-Haste, you get your butt to Mount Sayamoto. Do you need help getting up there? Let's just end. Blaine thinks once you're old, you're no longer attractive. Mud takes the shovel out of Blaine's hands. No, no.

Just go down the well. See you guys. Oh, yeah. I want to go and check on this old lady that fell in the well. Should we first ask what the quickest way to the Sora provinces? Yeah, that's a good question. That's a good question. If you exit Tsunam province to the south, you'll reach Sora province very quickly. Also, what's up with Megan? She was in a well and didn't seem... Why was she in the well? How do we...

Age-old question. Mud jumps in the well. No. Join me down here. I have no idea. That sounds extremely unlike her. It's where I belong. We were going to go check on Magon. We're never going to find out why she went down there. No, we won't.

Megan is the actual final baddie. She's just senile, you know? Yeah. Well, it sounded like he was out of character, so I think it might have been something. We should go check by her house before we go to the Sora province. I have a final question. Jisoo, do you happen to have any healing potions in your house? The second pamphlet is handed over. Gumbo is just on my shoulder working on pamphlets. He's a wonderful graphic designer. Oh, I might have something.

Hold on. He opens up the chest and starts rummaging through it and pulls out two. Here. They look like they have a little bit of ice in them. It kind of shakes them. These should still be good. I hand both to Gum-Gum. Are they just regular healing potions? Yeah. Do you want to deliver them to you? No. I got them and I hand them to Gum-Gum and I say, drink these. My fingers hit. Oh, I did not mean to stress that. That is not. I did not mean to. Okay. I rolled a one and I didn't mean to. So that would be

4D4 plus 4. If you give both, yeah. He's going to be a sloshy boy. Chuck, Chuck, Chuck. He's going to have to go pee. That's 5. 9.

nine three ones you're rolling liku i'm trying you really i'm up to 82 that's pretty good that's not bad let's go say hi to megan before we go to the store province so do you all go oh it's not far it's just a you know across the courtyard yeah so you go to her house i'll go check out the well and look why not i want to go to the house you good with that checking on this i don't think i really have to be in this you all go to the house except for gum gum who goes to the well i mean i guess i'll go with y'all that's fine okay you

You, uh, knock on the door and Megan opens it. She appears to be trying to clean herself up, but she still does have some ink on her. And says, oh, it's you again. I like look past her and see if there's any, like, danger, sense that there's any, like, shadrows. Make a perception check. All right. 20. Uh, nothing seems out of the ordinary. She has a small meal on a table laid out. That's it.

That's probably the only unusual thing. We need a code word that Gus can say when we are 100% wasting our time. I like how he's like, you need every second, every precious second to find these people and do this task. Well, it's his fault for introducing a weird character. Let's go follow up with a character we already helped.

Yeah. But everyone's like, oh, that's acting strange behavior. That's why we're here. All right. It's lovely to see you again. Just so you're sure. Do you happen to have any healing potions in your house that I might procure? No, but I have

some water if you want that i'd love a glass of water all right where are we going to next part we are going to let me open my pouch of notes we're going to the sora province yeah we have to go to the south to get there fastest yes and we're looking for winabi look at that yeah so you all head south megan in tow i'm just kidding no

She's back down at the bottom of the well. No. You don't know. I sit her down in her chair and I say, eat your food. And as Dream said, they're likely in a large temple. Yeah. Cool. Yeah, so you all head south and as you near the province of Sora, you notice dark clouds forming overhead, rumbling with thunder. A barely visible sun is nearing the western horizon. You reach Sora and the town is peaceful. No fires, no screams, no battles, just peaceful.

Silence. As you walk through the village on the main thoroughfare, it doesn't take long before you guess where Elder W'nabi might be. At the end of the path is a temple partly shrouded in darkness. And there's likely a lot of Shadrachs here because they're looking for... Yeah. Yeah. Because Shizu sent them this way. She's supposed to be in the large temple. All right. Well, let's approach. Yeah, let's start walking towards the large temple. I use... Pass without a trace. Thank you. Smart, smart bard. Pass without a trace.

Okay, and that affects everyone, right? Everybody! All my friends. And that just adds plus 10 to stealth, right? Yeah, for the duration of the creature you choose, each creature you choose is 30 feet of you, plus 10 bonus to dex, and can't be tracked except by magical means. Yeah, you enter the courtyard, and you kind of turn a bit and have to walk to the north to approach the temple. And as you, you know, walk into this courtyard, off to the east you see like a little shed and...

off to the west it looks like a ceremonial drum that's roped off and at the end of the path you see the temple but even from the outside it's clear that the center of the building is shrouded in darkness like magical darkness unnatural you've seen this darkness before it looks like the darkness you've seen would you say it's my old friend

All right, thanks for listening, everybody. We're done with this podcast. It's over. I'm going on a record of how many times I get Gus to shake his head. That one was pretty good. That was good. Thank you. Don't encourage it. Is it like that darkness when we docked? Yeah. Okay. Yeah, exactly. I have an idea. Yes? Yeah. Please. What if the little lad...

who's able to be invisible and has the benefits of my past without trace, tell us a little bit of reconnaissance. - Dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun, dun,

I picture Bart like jumping around, dun, dun, dun, looking left and right. And we have to remind Bart, Bart, you can't do the theme song while you're invisible or else they'll catch you. I do it really hard. Maybe they think they left a Bluetooth speaker on somewhere.

So how do you want to approach this part? Selfily. Wise. Are you going to go up to check a door? Are you going to go into the darkness? Are you going to go around the side, look for a window? Let me just go see if there's a door that's

that's unlocked. You would speculate that the door is probably currently shrouded in that darkness because the darkness is like kind of right in the center of the temple. Okay. So you'd have to enter the darkness to try to find it. Okay. So could I go around the side then that's not covered in darkness? Sure. You need to go as you're approaching you need to go to the left or to the right. Let's go to the left. Nice.

This one's for you, Kyborg. Kyborg senses something. Oh, yeah, yeah. Yeah, as you're getting closer to the temple, you can hear rumblings of thunder coming from inside the temple itself.

You walk over to the left and peek into the window. I'm going to make my perception check to see if you notice. Yeah, it doesn't matter. They don't see you. Yeah, you peek into the window and you see a Shadrow turning over a room. Looks like they're looking for something in this room. Do I recognize the Shadrow? No. Okay. I only see one, you said? Yeah, in this room that you went to the left, you see one Shadrow in here. Okay.

And it sounds like that thunder or that rumbling you heard is coming from the right kind of inside that darkness. Could I do something? You're at a window. But you don't know that, I guess, right? Oh, yeah. Bart is invisible. You can make a perception check to try to see Bart.

sure it's not gonna go well for you i'm gonna see this little lad just a 23. oh make a stealth check bart with advantage i know i don't think it's gonna go well for you and just to clarify the only reason i'm having bart roll and i didn't have uh bart roll when i rolled earlier is i rolled a six and a one there's no way yeah that was the thing impossible with advantage this 31 but plus 10 is 41. you have no idea where bart went then i do nothing this is bart this is bart's show

Okay. Could I go to a different window? Yeah. Which direction do you want to go? I guess continuing around the building. Yeah. This was a rather large room. So, you know, you're going to have to go around to the back of the building to get to a different room. Do you want to go all the way around? Yeah. You peek in that window. Make my check. No point. Yeah. And you peek in and it's like you see like a sitting room. And again, see another Shadrow like ripping open cushions and flipping over furniture looking for something. Please.

Looking for an item or the elder? I don't know. I love they're looking for, well, why would they be looking for a humanoid type thing within furniture and stuff? That doesn't make sense. That's when you're looking for a thing. Seems like they're looking for something. Yeah. Yeah. Just one you said, right? Yes. And do I recognize him? No. Okay. Could I continue around the other, like? Yeah, yeah. You can. You can also see into this next room from the backside of the building. Okay. Make my check. I don't know why I do this.

It's pretty much impossible. Yeah, you peek into this room and it looks like it's sleeping quarters, like a bedroom. And again, there's another Shadrow in here that you do not recognize. Cutting open the mattress, looking under the bed, kind of searching for something. Okay, weird. And I don't see Winabe at all, right? I don't see any sort of... No, all you see so far are these three Shadrow, one in each room. Okay, I guess, is there any more windows I could check before getting back to the front of the building?

No, from what you can tell based on looking in, it's only these three rooms and then the fourth room by the front door that's currently shrouded in darkness.

Could I return to my party? Yeah. Bart magically appears. No! Well, I'm still invisible, I think. Oh, no. Okay. Yeah, Bart's invisible. Don't freak out. It's me, Bart. Sorry. I stepped on your jaw. It's okay. That's good. So good. So there are at least three Shadrows in there looking for something. They're tearing apart cushions. They're looking under things. I don't know what they're looking for, but this house is probably full of them. Is it the big old temple? Big old temple. Got multiple stories? No, one.

Oh, okay. But I suppose we either, we got to go for the direct approach. Maybe if we tried to lure them out into a trap. That could potentially work. Oh, how we do that? I don't know. Call them out to the front and then like sneak around behind them. I could cast an illusion. We could pretend to be, what's her name? We don't know what she looks like. One of the elders. Oh, yeah. Do an illusion and I will do a... Before you do that, we'll make a perception check one more time. I'm sorry. 19. 13. 14.

Mud and Kyborg, you hear a particularly loud crack of thunder come from the temple. Probably no time.

Let's go in. Approach the door and open it. Well, it's dark, right? Yeah, you'll have to feel for it and slide it open. As you approach the darkness and get closer, you see a bronze dragonborn jump out of the darkness and then quickly jump back in. As in like pulled back in? No, jumped of their own free will. Which way were they facing as they jumped out? Facing still towards the darkness, facing towards the building. So they kind of jumped backwards. Like jump backwards and then jump back in. Yeah. Did they? Okay. You know what?

I cast Dispel Magic. Oh, yeah. Let's see. It's a good thing you have that. I don't know what we would do. Let's see. The darkness dissipates, and you see that fancy Shadrow from before locked in combat with an elderly bronze dragonborn with waves of thunderous storm breath emanating from the dragonborn every now and then, keeping the Shadrow at bay.

The elder catches sight of you all for a second and throws a dagger that hits one of the posts along the walkway near you. He looks at you and says, Hurry, leave! And he turns his attention back to the Shadrow, who is in combat. All right, see you later. Can I grab the dagger? Yeah, you grab it and there's like a little piece of paper with a drawing attached to it. On the dagger? Or that he like... Like wrapped around. I can read this.

Well, yeah. Can I borrow that gum gum? Well, I mean, what? But you can read it because it's a drawing. What is it? Oh, okay. Sorry. Got it. Got it. It's got a picture of like a hand-drawn horn and a drum on it. Didn't we see a drum? Yeah, we saw a drum coming into the town. Yeah. Did we see a horn? I don't recall. I perceive there's any horns around. We saw a big drum, not a horn, dog coming into the... I perceive there's any horns in this big building.

Maybe that's what they're looking for. That might be what they're looking for. Okay, never mind. Yeah, that's what it is. Oh, there's a big drum? Yes. Is the drum like a big old timpani kind of thing? Yeah, similar to that. It's slightly roped off. What if someone goes to hit the drum and see if that does anything? I break the drum open. You break the drum open? Okay. What?

Maybe we needed it. I thought maybe the horn was in it. Uh, what? Okay, it wasn't. I don't break the drum open. I smack Gumbo on the drum. It lets out a very loud bassy boom. Oh, wait, that's on the other side of town, though, right? Oh. What, the drum? No, it's in the courtyard here, right in front of the temple. Oh, the courtyard. When you walked into the courtyard, there was the drum to your left and a shed to the right. Oh, look in the shed. I'll head to the shed. Uh, somebody want to come with? Yes. All right.

Alright, so then, Gumball, why don't you hang out with Mudd? Alright, Bart and I go to the shed. You two approach the shed, and inside there's a bunch of musical wind instruments. Horns, flutes, things of that nature. Multiple horns? Well, multiple styles of horn, I should say. French, sax. Can we tell what kind of horn was on the drawing? Yeah. Yeah, you find one that looks very similar to what was in the drawing. Okay. Bard? Bard?

Bart! Yeah, could I... And I can do drums. Could I, uh, bring it out and say, "Hit that drum! On the count of three!" And then on the count of three, um, Bart will also try to play the horn. Yeah. Yeah! I want a performance check from Bart. Okay. And from Gum-Gum. Okay. One's gonna be higher than the other. Mine is a 30. It is a drum at least. Nine!

Go invent a new time signature for his drumming that you've never heard before. I know how to use drums. What does that mean? I have proficiency in drums. What does that mean? No, you don't. Stop saying that. All right.

Oh!

Y'all are dead. Go ahead and give me all the characters. Oh, no. Stop that. I don't like that joke. No, no, no. But if you want to find out what does happen, you have to tune in to the next episode of Tales from the Stinky Dragon. Maybe we're super powerful now. Was our song cool, at least? It was just... It sounded cool. You liked it. Mike is going to go nuts with this.

Yeah, just like that. Thanks for listening, everyone. I want to give a quick shout out to folks that interacted with us on social media recently. Here are some NPCs named after them in this episode. Namito, the Dragonborn Elder, named after at user falsely named. Did I say that weird? A.K.A. Graham. Bolink, the Shadrow Leader, named after at LinkIB. Ladoria, the Shadow Dragon, named after at Laladoria. Lin, the Little Red Dragonborn Boy and his rabbit gen, named after at Legion8182.

Get it?

I also want to give a special thanks to some friends who provided voiceover for characters in this episode. Inku was voiced by Raquel Lilly, Elder Namito, voiced by our Stinky Dragon producer, Brendan Carruthers, Elder Wanabe, voiced by another Stinky Dragon producer, Ben Ernst, Elder Estream, voiced by Quentin Smith, and Elder Shizu, voiced by Ashley Dillard. We'll see you next week with another episode of Tales from the Stinky Dragon. ♪