C01 - Ep. 08.5 - Infinight Interns - Between the Tales
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This is a Rooster Teeth production. Hello, everyone. Welcome to Tales from the Stinky Dragon. We're back with a little bonus episode, a little supplementary episode. We're going to dive into the meat of the world. So I hope you're hungry. Bonus meat? I'm vegetarian. Bonus meat. We got some tofurkey for you. Don't worry. We got you cooked. Yuck. Wait, I have a... Sorry.

I have a quick question just before we get... What exactly happened at the end? You said you changed something at the end of the episode. Don't worry about that yet. We're doing a supplementary episode right now. A little bonus episode, Chris. Okay. No story. Just supplement. I was making sure I was up to date. Yeah. Gum gum died. Gum gum died.

I'm glad you said that because we are going to go over the story so far as part of this supplemental episode. So people who've listened to the story can get a refresher and maybe new people who haven't heard the story so far can get caught up to speed and learn what's going on. So it's a win-win. I would say it's a win-win. Don't you agree, Chris? Win-win. Yeah. Wind-win. Am I talking to Chris or am I talking to Gum-Gum? Gum-Gum. They're one and the same, Gus, I think. Oh, no.

So just to kind of like, like I said, build some flavor and do some world building to help people to help the listeners in their mind's eye understand what it is that's happening. We want to maybe have everyone spend a little bit of time talking about their character, you know, like really tell everyone, you know, we normally, you know, we don't get into it because like a metagame thing, but like really talk about like, what is your character's race? What is their class, their background? You know, what do you want the audience to know about?

about your character like the things that you've learned so far in our first eight episodes but you're gonna quiz us is that right no no this is you i'm asking it's there's no right or wrong answers it's up to you guys i want to hear your your thoughts on your character i mean of course obviously you should know your race and your class for your character but i mean the background and everything else that's up to you that's what story are you telling what story are you telling right now who wants to go first yeah who wants to go first let's get a volunteer

I think John said he wanted to go. I think John... Why don't we roll for it? Fine. Coward. You mean mud. Mud. Yeah. Yeah, roll initiative. We could do that. Yeah, you know what? That little coward throwing me up there? Roll initiative. Yeah, everyone roll initiative. I gotta love it. I mean, poop! Aren't you happy about that, Kyber? That means you go last. I thought you didn't want to go first. Oh, yeah. Hey, sweet.

So we got Mud with a 17, Bart with a 16, Gum Gum with an 11, and Kyborg with a 5. So Mud, you're first anyway. That's probably how we would have gone. Right. Yeah. So Mud comes from actual like a Furbolg royalty. It's why he has so much money. Oh. You guys always wondered like why I had that much money. You guys didn't. That's because he comes from that background. However...

despite the expectations that his family put on him. Mud ain't down with the sickness. You know, royalty and expectations and that kind of traditional BS. And so all Mud really wants to do is live the simple life. Stop eating my foot. Sorry. Who's doing that? It's Matt. That was me. Mud just wants to live the simple life. Holy shit. I got to get a kitten out of my room. Just a second.

That's part of Mudd's character development. All right, sounds like you're up, Barb. John's getting his girlfriends into weird stuff, man. Foot fetishes, I guess. Mudd has a cat, and... Apologies. Continue. Sorry, what were you saying, Barb? Nothing, I was just saying Mudd should have a cat in the story as well. It's funny you say that, because actually I just, with leveling up, just got an ability called Summon Beast, where I can summon this, like, bestial spirit, which I'm excited about. Ooh.

So I can get a pet and I can be a pet because I've now learned how to become a camel and a mastiff.

Yeah, that's all it is. Like, like mud is the D and D version of the guy who just wants to live the van life and, uh, travel around and, uh, enjoy nature and all the elements. Uh, mud is, is kind of like his own little, uh, fuzzy, uh, uh, avatar, the last airbender. Cause he has all these elemental stuff, but he loves the elements. He loves nature and he just doesn't really want to do the, uh, the he's, he's, he's not, he's not down with the man.

The subject of putting dirt into coffee has come up a few times for Mud. What's up with that? Mud loves dirt and earth and rocks. It's like his favorite element. And he genuinely thinks that dirt tastes good and actually serves as a pretty good spice. I mean...

We take just plants off the ground and make them spice. Why can't the dirt that the plants grow from also be spice? Interesting. Can you explain just for a furball, your character, whatever your thing is? Maybe like a physical description of the character? Well, and also just what exactly they are. Yeah. Furbogs are like... They're big...

fuzzy-like kind of giant creatures. And they're... They kind of have some... I wouldn't say elf-like features, but they got pointy ears. Mud is, I think, like...

8 feet tall and 300 pounds. That's a really big boy. Wow. And so even with that class, I actually count as oversized. So that's why I can carry more stuff. But yeah, he's just a big boy and just really wants to enjoy life instead of doing what his parents need him to do. That's why I was like, go get a cool haircut from some singing mantises. Hell yeah. His name is Mug.

Mud is also queer and still defining and discovering what exactly part of the spectrum he lands on. Because it can be a process. Yeah. And specifically, what class is Mud?

Mud is a druid. Yeah. Which is why he has all of these elemental abilities. And since he chose his druid circle, he got Circle of the Moon. He even more leans into the wild shape ability of druids.

And so that's why he can turn into certain beasts that he sees. And even because of that, he can do it even like as a bonus action. Like it's normally like an action for regular druids. He can just do as a bonus action. And that's like what you mentioned earlier, being able to turn into a camel or a mastiff.

Yeah. I basically have to see the animal and it's like, there's a certain tier of animals that I can transform up to. Like, I can't like see a dragon at this point and turn into it, but luckily camels and Mastiffs are in my cookbook. Nice. Anything else you want to add about mud or do you feel like that's a, that's everything you want the audience to know? I think that that's enough backstory of mud as far as specifics, but I think the rest of kind of get garnered from how I've played mud. Uh,

He's definitely not any sort of like, he doesn't really exude any alpha male energy. And yeah, he's not here to be that. He'll let other individuals fill that role. Got it. Like I'm being stared at right now. Bart. Yeah, and Bart, you're next on the initiative. It's your turn. It's me. So Bart is a halfling bard.

name bart no confusion oh by the way bart i don't think i've ever told this to you i speak halfling oh you do it's i i picked that that that language you can pick like a language and i picked halfling and he that's why we're team bud yeah that's that's why i like my little my little dude bart and mud yeah um so he is about four foot four but 150 pounds so he's he's pretty beefy like that's

It's all muscle. He's got a good physique. You're 4'4", and Mud is 8 feet tall, but you weigh half of what Mud weighs. Yes. Chunky boy. I was trying to contextualize this here. I didn't realize Bart was so muscular. He's very, like, you wouldn't think he's 150 pounds looking at him, especially since he's only 4'4", but he's, like, dense. Yeah. Like a star. Yeah. Yeah.

He's got red hair and pretty pale, got brown eyes, small little fella. But he's very good looking. He's a he's a ladies man. He's very charming. And he actually is an orphan.

And he was kind of picked up by a group of pirates and grew up with pirates. That's why he learned how to like sing and play some instruments. He would entertain the pirates. Sometimes when he sings, he kind of sings with a pirate accent. So if that comes out, that's why.

And he met Gum Gum as he was traveling on his own for the first time and they became good friends. Yeah. It's like the what's it called? What's that? Of Mice and Men? Yeah. Of Mice and Men is what I like. Yeah.

That's funny. That's pretty comprehensive. I feel like we have a good idea. I never had any idea that Bart was so muscular, so fit. So fit. But he looks small. S-M-O-L. Small. It's unassuming that he could sneak up on people and surprise them with his physical prowess. Exactly.

His dashing good looks. Exactly. If he's 150 pounds, we really need to be rethinking some of these moments where he's like writing on people. I also say he's 150 pounds because that is in my, I don't know if it was like a default, but it just says weight 150 pounds, height four foot four. And I'm like, all right, that works.

Chonky boy. So he's redhead? Redhead, yes. Eye color? Brown. Brown eyes, okay. But he wishes he had green. I forgot to say mud in case people wanted a physical description. He's green, green furred.

And he's got purple streak in his hair now. Is that the color streak in his hair? I think it's pink or purple. Oh, it's pink. It's pink. It's pink. Pink streak in his hair. And he's got those druidic symbols now in his undercut. So that's just just so people know. Nice. OK, who was next? Gum gum. Gum gum. So gum gum. Well, I guess I could. I guess I don't know how much. Well, gum gum is a half orc barbarian. And he is.

He knows that his mom was an orc. He doesn't know anything about his dad, but he knows, at least he believes, that his dad is a great elf wizard, one of the greatest ever. How does he know that? What makes him think? He just feels it? He feels it. He feels like he has magic in him. And his mom died recently.

I guess when he was she was giving birth to him and he you know, he doesn't really have he doesn't really know his what happened to his dad or all he has of his what from his dad is a he found like a long rock

wand thing that's kind of like imagine like a cylindrical teardrop kind of wand thing that he carries around with him that he he's he's named Boomba which is a magic wand. Boomba. Yeah you you dropped that on us at the at the chapel. I think that's the first time you said that. And so that's the only thing he has from his dad and that's all he he really doesn't know anything about his dad other that that yeah that's it. So he was raised in an orphanage and

as a half work was kind of picked on a lot and so kind of I think I think kind of turned to like created his own kind of fantasies to to kind of you know

And it's I don't know whether so he's he's he's kind of his big thing is he wants to find his dad, find out about his dad and become a great wizard like his dad. And oh, yeah. And physically, I mean, he's a big half orc, I guess, kind of green. And he wears like raggedy wizard esque clothes.

clothes like so he's got like a wizard hat like a typical what you but like a one that he kind of like tattered one that he found and put you know yeah i was gonna ask is there any story behind that like did he find it or did he have it made at some point or was it handed down no i think he's just piece it's almost like things that he's like cobbled together over time that he thinks it's like he finds things and he thinks that they're magical it's like treasures for him or something yeah and then yeah he met bart um

And I guess it was a mutually beneficial relationship because I think kind of helps Bart. I don't know. I guess I assume maybe like someone was we haven't actually supposed to talk that maybe people were picking on gum gum and then Bart stuck up for him and then start hanging out. I predict.

And specifically, you mentioned that, you know, he's a half-orc, thinks his father's a wizard. Did you mention explicitly that he's a barbarian? Oh, yeah, he's a barbarian. Like, as in, like, that's because, you know, he was kind of raised in an orphanage, like, out, you know, out in the middle, like, almost like in the wild wilderness area.

And kind of went at some point went off on his own and kind of just kind of learned life through, I don't know, barbarian lifestyle, I guess. Being out on his own. Yeah. And so he's pretty strong. He's very strong.

In some ways. We can always depend on GumGum to try to pick up an opponent and toss him around. Is that it for GumGum? I think that's all I want to say. At least all I want to say explicitly. GumGum's a very private guy. When we were doing our leveling up, I was adding spells to my guy and there's a spell that's just called Holding Person. And I was like, no, that's GumGum's.

And that brings us to Kyborg. Can I play music? Sure. If it's not going to get a copyright struck. No, no, no, no, no, no. It's fine. It's fine. It's fine. All right. No, no, no, no. It's not fine. That's not an answer. It's fine. It's fine. It's fine. It's fine. Long ago on the outskirts of the. Can you hear the music? No, no. Okay. No, no. All right. I'm going to say yes.

I don't even know. I don't even know. How about you do it without music? Well, I'm going to play the music for me. All right. No, I want to hear the music. I refuse to listen now. Can you hear this? Can you hear that? No. All right. Hold on. It's going to be worth it, guys. It's cool, dude. I mean, you were last. You had all this time to set it up. It's cool that you failed at it.

While we're waiting on him to do that, I'll answer a question from Twitter where someone wanted to know, Ben Johnson, Demonic Turtle, wants to know that when mud turns into animals, does he look just like the animals or is there part of mud in them? Yes, it's like when Beast Boy turns into animals and retains the color and everything. So I don't think it's full retention. It's not going to be like a green Mastiff, but maybe the Mastiff has a little pink streak in its hair, you know?

Guys, you gotta hear this song. It's a good song. How about this? I'm gonna send out the song to everybody. And then on the count of three, we'll play it together. Count me down on when you're gonna do it. You ready?

Okay, here we go. Ready? Yeah. Go. Okay. Long ago, on the outskirts of the Netherwinter Woods, lived a young boy named Kydalius with his family and other elven warriors. But one day, tragedy struck when the evil warlord Quadrin and his Quadrin Squadron, super commandos from the dark, attacked without any warning. Kydalius!

What did they call those things? Hold on. Gollum.

A Golem! He took the Golem arm off and put it onto his own body and swore vengeance on Quadrant and the Quadrant Squadron. He then went on a vision quest, training for decades in solitude to one day take his revenge.

Okay, you can cut the music. That was beautiful. That was worth it. I want to say the music was really good. It's a good song. It's a good track. That was totally worth it. Yeah, yeah. So then Kyderius changed his name to Gaeborg.

That day, yeah. Anyways, Kyborg's a 5'10 male wood elf. He's got blonde hair, very muscular, really handsome, greenish-brownish eyes. He catches it in certain lights, got little hues of blue, fair skin. What was I saying? Speaks volumes that when faced with a severe injury like an entire limb cut off, he opted to just go into the woods. Oh.

Diarrheas. He does not have diarrhea. He was escaping with his life because Quadrant attacked his people, wiped them out. All right? So then he escaped with his life and went into the Neverwinter Woods. So does he have any family? No, they're all dead. So he's been... So that's... So his...

His athletic proficiencies and all that stuff are like crazy high. He's got super strength because he's been like, you know, working out for years and training as a warrior. I bet that'd be a good montage. Oh, it was the greatest. It was, yeah, it was a total vision quest. But because of his isolation, he doesn't have a lot of social skills and his intelligence and wisdom is not the best. So he makes up for it with his heart of gold and his arm of metal. Yeah.

That's pretty cool. Just so you know, I did try to route the music through Discord. It showed up in my audacity, but it doesn't come through Discord. I don't know what's going on. I kind of heard it faintly. I heard it faintly. Maybe I needed to really crank it. It almost was as if I was just hearing it in my mind.

You know the exact song that I was playing though, right? It's just like, you know, deep low synth. Kyborg's theme. We'll have the sound library rename it to Kyborg's theme. Kyborg's theme. He's got diarrhea eyes. No, Micah. No.

Oh, and do we go over like specifically your fighter and all of that stuff? No, I don't think we talked about that. Yeah, I'm just a fighter. I proficiencies in like archery and stuff like that. Sort of my main focus is trying to think if there's anything else that you guys might need to know about me.

She's been working out. Do you like long walks on the beach or romance novels? Never been to the beach. I was isolated in the woods for years after my family was murdered. So that explains your social skills. Oh, yeah. You always go left. Yeah. And I always go left because that's the one good arm that I have left because my right arm is off. See, that doesn't make sense to me. I feel like you should always go right. What?

Why? Because my right arm is off. When you go left, you're relying on your right arm to lead into the attack because your left arm is going away from that section. When you go right, then your left arm leads into the turn. My left is my lucky arm because it's my only arm. It makes perfect sense when you think about it. Okay. All right. I would go the opposite, but all right. That's up to you. Listen, Kyborg's not a smart man, all right? His family was murdered at a young age.

By Quadrant and the Quadrant Squadron. You need to remember that. The Quadrant Squadron. Got it. Yeah, they might come back. I don't know. That's totally up to you. Oh, they will? Gus and Ben. Well, that's up to you guys. Micah suggests that you get a tattoo on your left arm for Lucky Lefty. You would never. No? No.

How would he even find such tools to do that? Well, I guess he has a robot arm. Gumco could do it. Maybe like a cool dagger or something. Yeah, Bart spent time on a pirate ship. I bet Bart could do it. Kyborg's body is a temple. That's what Ben says and that's what I agree with. He's a fantastic artist as well. He did a lot of tattoos on people on the pirate ship. Oh,

I want a tattoo. Maybe when Kyborg's asleep, you can give him a nice tattoo. I think I would wake up tonight because I'm a cunning warrior. You could tie him down, get him drunk, tie him down and give him a tattoo. I'm going to give him some permanent eyeliner. Make him pretty. A winged eyeliner. I actually have a...

an ability to give you even more stealth so i'll just give it to you and you can really just do it while you're sleeping okay i am super stealthy already so that would i know i can give you even more like we can just like literally undetectable you could do whatever you want to kai where i also have invisibility yep all right

It's happening. Why? I just read up something. I'm just reading up on fur bogs. Is there a reason why I'm so small compared to the average fur bog? Is it like just the game only allows certain heights for D&D? Because like average height, 10 feet to 11 feet. I'm two feet. I'm like two and a half feet shorter because they're like 10 and a half feet. And also I'm tiny. They're supposed to be between seven and eight feet tall. I'm looking at fur bogs. Stunted your growth with dirt coffee. Yeah.

Yeah, that's what Micah says. There's lots of fiber in dirt. Where do you see that? Oh, let's see. Yeah, I see. Maybe I'm thinking of an earlier edition where they were shorter. Yeah. I don't appreciate being capped. Because if you look at it, like if you do a Google search and you just search for like furball height D&D, it says between seven and eight feet tall. But if you look up the Forgotten Realms stuff, it says that they're between...

10 and a half to 11 and a half feet. Yeah. There might be some kind of discrepancy. Maybe there's like different rule books that cover that stuff.

So I don't know. You're the one who wrote it down. You tell us. I don't know. That's because the game only let me do that height. D&D Beyond. I didn't have any music for my character. He's small. He's small. It's like King Kong in Skull Island. Because he's actually 29 years old, but they live up to like 500 years. So that's probably what it is. He's young. He's a young boy. A young boy. He'll get to Godzilla size soon. Chris, you didn't have any music? No. I didn't have as much energy as Blaine. I can redo it. Nope. No. Nope. We got it.

I bet mine would have sad music anyway. Something like a sad song from like Lord of the Rings or like the Elves Fading to the West or the Elves Fading to the West. Yeah, that kind of thing. So now that we know the background for all of our characters and we have a good mental picture for them, I think this would be a good time to catch up on the story so far. What we've experienced in these first eight episodes.

Just in case, you know, people have forgotten or in case we got some new listeners who want to get caught up quickly on the story. But I think it would be really boring if I told it because I have all the documents in front of me. So I want to hear you guys tell me the story so far. Hmm. Hey,

Take it away, Mud. Why? Why do you keep making me do it? Let's roll initiative again. New initiative. I'll take it, but I'll do it in Gum Gum's perspective. Nope, we don't have time for Gum Gum's version of it. We just do it from start to finish with the gorder that we did our backstory and I've shown all the details that we missed. Let's see, Mud rolled a 5, Bart rolled a 21. Should we do Micah suggesting one sentence at a time? Oh, absolutely.

Cyborg 7. I hope I get a perfect roll so I can do... Roll! I got a 5. I'm doing mine from GumGum perspective. GumGum and Mud both rolled a 5. GumGum's dexterity is 13.

Mud is 15. So mud goes first. Mud goes before gum gum, I mean. So Bart, you want to lead her away? All right. Four very talented, beautiful, skilled warriors. We're in the way of us passing by them. Do you want me to get music for this, Barbara? No, no, no. We're good. That's what editing is for, Blaine.

You can play music in your head. Four very smart, dashing adventurers were on their way. On their way into the city. Or, right? That's where we're going? Okay. That's how far we got before getting confused. I love it. Oh, are we going back to the very beginning? Yeah, the very beginning. We're recapping it. So, you're next. One sentence, Kaibor. All right, so there's a superhero team named the Infinites.

In cell lights. And they went missing. And they're really mad about the Twitch meta. Yes. And they went missing. So this guy is this mayor, gub? Prattle. Prattle is looking for some replacement interns to find out what happened to him, but also to be like the saviors of that city area.

I think you just added that last bit. That's good. Yeah, a lot of ands and buts to really make a super compound sentence there. But they were attacked in the night. Mud.

So yeah, they show up for the internship program. They take up lodging on the campus-like place. Would you call it a campus? Sure. Don't forget what happens with Paralite and Mayor Prattle. Important piece of info. Oh yeah, they were in the office with Mayor Prattle going through their kind of orientation and then a door opened up beneath Mayor Prattle who then was dropped into a labyrinthian maze

maze of puzzles and challenges for the group to go through. Okay, gum gum. And cut. The Infinites are maybe one of them is my dad. Are you the only one doing this in character? Yep. Yes. And then so they went missing and because they got captured by this mean lady and we

We went looking for them, but there was a doctor who drinks a lot, and he gave us a mission. All right, that's actually pretty good. Bart? I feel like this is not helping new listeners. A little confused with where Gum Gum left that.

Did we get to the part with the different puzzles with the brooms and the plants and the bears and all that? I think he was starting to lead into that. Oh, I kind of just skipped that. He jumped through all that to the drunk doctor who sent us through this issue. Oh, right. Okay. So why don't you clarify that, Bart? Well, right before Gum Gum's explanation, we went through a series of rooms where we had to do different puzzles to try to...

get through a door at the end of the hallway. And those puzzles had a broom and a plant and a bear and a coffee mug and a sock and a music note. That sounds insane. Isn't that crazy? That's why Gum Gum skipped that part. Well, after going through all these challenges and then finding out that, you know, Paralite had somehow gotten in the castle, it turns out it was like that was also part of...

The test and they passed the test and there was like some alcoholism involved, but I'm going to skirt past that because it's a it's a really weird part of the story. But I think something's up prattle or was it the doctor? Is the doctor doctor doctor? Psych science. Yeah. Dr. Aham. Something's up with Dr. Aham. Any who's they get set on a mission because there's like a lead in a town, I think. And and they're the group.

Go to a, uh, go to like a desert town. And there's a lot of like mantis creatures, manticores, manta. Okay. Nailed it. Uh, mud. We were sent to the town to purchase something for a hundred gold. I've even at this point forgotten exactly what it was we were there to purchase. Wow. Wow, John. We don't know. You can hush. Uh,

What was it we were sent to buy? We don't know. I think it was a lead. Oh, but why were we sent there to buy something? Like, what was the reasoning? The doctor told us to go get it. Yeah, but there was incentive as to why we were doing it. Because the doctor said to. Save me. The doctor sent you to retrieve something that was needed to track down the missing Infinites. You don't know specifically what it was.

Like I said, a lead. But it was for the ongoing quest of finding the missing infinites, and that's what it was. And so we went there. We got distracted from buying the item we needed from the local shop because the shop owner...

No, because a nun in the city was arrested in the middle of the shop we were about to purchase it from, which then sent us on this whirlwind heist of getting the nun out of jail for the shop owner. Gum gum. Well, and then at the shop, they had some neat stuff, like a pogo stick, a go-go stick.

and i wanted it and so and also we need to go inside a jail and i said we need an inside man or an inside half orc did we completely skip over the conveyor belt stuff there's a lot let's get it so much okay i was like i think we skipped like four episodes but uh so then so then uh i i broke into the store and got arrested with uh mud

And then he threw the stick on the... The pogo stick on the roof. All right. Bart. And then Bart and Kyborg went up to the roof to jump onto the jail. If I'm recalling that correctly. And Kyborg crashed through the roof. And then...

And then... Found a... Found a... Kyborg? This is where my notes are done. The undead body of the sheriff's daughter was there.

We were there to rescue basically a priestess or like some nun. I don't know who had gotten in prison for, you know, letting some disease out. And the sheriff looked like she was out of line. But we thought she was out of line. So then we try to go and break that old lady out. Well, she's not there. And it turns out there's like a secret place.

lair that the sheriff was in. She was going to like murder the nun and we're like, don't do it. And she's like, I'm going to do it. And then it turns out like we had it wrong. Cause the nun was actually bad. She runs off to some like temple. So we team up with the sheriff to take down the evil nun and the nuns, like bringing all these dead bodies back to life. This is the worst, uh, the opening of star Wars text crawl ever. I'm going for 20 minutes. Um,

yeah, inside the jail, just to clarify, we did find the cursed daughter of the sheriff who, uh, was upset about the nun, uh, causing the curse. And, uh,

We followed the secret passage from the jail all the way under the town to the church at the top of the town and come to find out the sheriff was in their rights in that the nun was the one who brought upon the curse to the town and...

was in need of more souls in order to complete the ritual that they were trying to do. I, at this point, also am vague on exactly what their original intention was to accomplish once they got all their correct amount of souls. She's just a veritable Shang Tsung, you know? She's just, your soul is mine. Gum Gum, anything you want to add there? She was making dead people alive again.

and they were mean and because she wanted to bring someone back probably a dead person and then so she's I we fought her and and then she was being mean and I attacked the glowy statue that spoke to me because it was bringing dead people back Bart you got anything you want to finish off there uh

And we all lived happily ever after. Who came through the portal behind her? Who came through the portal behind her? I'm just finishing my joke here before Jon interrupts me again. We all lived happily ever after. Until... Until... Oh, you didn't even add! I was trying to sense you have to add. What happened? Someone claiming to be Paralite comes through?

And did what? Yeah. And it's your turn. It's your turn, Mud. When we were after defeating the nun before doing any sort of final blow, I believe a portal opened up behind her, some sort of a gateway. And Paralite came through and basically claimed the nun.

And I don't remember if we ended just there or if Paralite took the nun through the portal and left us. I believe that is where you ended. I think someone tried to interrupt her and maybe it was Kyborg and she told them to wait and they stopped. And she had a little speech that she was giving and that's where we ended. So I can't imagine the...

pain that Micah is feeling right now. His beautifully crafted story being butchered in the retelling by the players experiencing it. Micah says it's all canon. Absolutely. Every word of it.

So I think you all did a fantastic job telling the story, but just to be safe, I'll go ahead and I'm going to try to give one from my memory. I'm not going to look at the documents, but I'm going to try to give one to the best of my recollection. So you all were summoned because there's a team of heroes called the Infinites that go all around the realms protecting them and kind of like superheroes for this world.

and they had a call for interns and you all were adventurers who answered the call to apply to be interns for the Infinites. You had to travel to a town called Boulderey. On your way there, you were riding an oxen cart who was being piloted by a half-orc named Oof and you met a goblin on the road. Your cart broke down and you all met a goblin on the road who offered to help you fix your cart and had the correct tools to do so.

And then when you all were done fixing your cart, Bart stole his tools and you all left him on the side of the road. You got to Boulderay and you met Guard Grattle at the gate, who was obviously, from what you could tell, wearing a fake prosthetic nose. And he went and unlocked the gates for you, led you into town, and then you realized that he was actually Mayor Prattle in disguise. You saw a little bit of the town, then went into town.

uh, mayor prattles office. I believe you all drank some coffee on your way. And I think his assistant made some coffee. That's where we first discovered mud likes dirt in his coffee. You go in and that's when, uh, guard grattle reveals himself to officially be mayor prattle. Uh, just wearing a prosthetic nose. Oh, actually I take it back. I got to step back on your way in. You had an encounter with Brink Tussler and I believe, uh, high Borg, uh, had a little showdown with him and, lost your encounter. And then you paid, uh,

You had made a wager on your fight and you paid Brink Tussler with fake gold that I believe Bart had conjured up. You go into the mayor's office. Mayor Prattle tells you that the Infinites are actually missing and that you guys are going to need to help him find them.

Then you all get shown around the Infinite Headquarters. And while Mayor Prattle is showing you the Infinite Headquarters, he disappears through a trap door in the floor. And you all go downstairs and encounter a bunch of different puzzle rooms that you have to navigate through, including making coffee for a dragon, sorting laundry for some cubes, cleaning up a room for some automatons. And eventually, when you do enough tasks, the door at the end of the hallway opens up

And you encounter a room with two people who are bound and gagged and they have masks or bags over their heads. You can't see them and they're on a conveyor belt with traps threatening to injure them. And you'll have to go in and stop the traps and save them.

And you discover it's Dr. M and Mayor Prattle. And they are being held by a scenario that Dr. M had set up to test you all to make sure you were worthy of going out to save the Infinites. But when he set up all of these traps, Dr. M was drunk. And so he set them up too dangerously. So they could have been really hurt, but you all saved them in time.

After that, you have to do some training. So you go through a couple of rooms practicing your stealth and your combat abilities. You re-encounter Brink Tussler and some of his goons who've come back to collect their money. But you all might successfully navigate that and complete your training there at the Infinite Headquarters. Somewhere along the way, we killed a hamster. You did. You did kill a hamster to stop the conveyor belt. Who's to say?

After completing your training and besting Brink Tussler, who's just... He's just looking for his money. You guys get sent to... You need to recover a package for Dr. Ahem from Pious Pass, which is a desertish town. You pass through the Emmer's Gateway to get there. And it's a deserty town that's filled with...

mantis-like humanoids called pies. You all search the entire town before going to the give-and-take store to acquire the item you've been sent to get. And I believe you were given 100 gold from Dr. to get this item. While you're in the store, you spend a lot of time looking at all the different items, talking to a chick who runs the store. Then at one point, Mother Abby comes out needing supplies for the chapel. Then while she's picking up the supplies,

Sheriff Gov comes in and arrests her, much to the surprise of all of the townspeople. You try to intervene, but the sheriff tosses some throwing stars and a smoke grenade and disappears with Mother Abby. The chick begs you to rescue Mother Abby and says that she'll pay you and asks you to meet her at the Little Pecker Saloon later that night. So you spend the rest of the day wandering around the town. Mud gets a haircut and a song at the barbershop.

Then as the day progresses, you all go back to Little Pecker Saloon. You meet up with Chick, who's there with some of the other townsfolk.

and they ask you to have a mission to rescue Mother Abby from the jail. Gum-Gum has the great idea to be an inside man and goes and breaks into the give-and-take along with Mud's help, but they both end up getting arrested, but not before Mud is able to take a magic item and toss it onto the roof for Kyborg to use to get into the jail. While all that's going on, Kyborg and Bart are on the roof waiting to get this item to get into the jail, and...

and uh then once they get the item they begin their heist to break into the jail but little do they know while they're getting into the jail mud and gum gum are already in there and they discover that the sheriff's dead daughter question mark is in this jail cell with them they unbind her and realize that she is a zombie like presumably from a curse that's afflicting the town that's when the party regroups deals with the zombie what did y'all do y'all charmed her i

I believe someone charmed her to get her to be submissive. You search through the jailhouse, find a secret tunnel that takes you over to the Hump House stables. And that's where you hear the sheriff interrogating Mother Abby. You all intervene, allowing Mother Abby to escape. And that's when you realize Mother Abby was really evil and that the sheriff was doing the right thing. And then you team up with the sheriff to go have a showdown with Mother Abby at the chapel. And that's when the portal opens up.

And Paralite steps through, incapacitates Mother Abby, and begins giving a speech to you all and the townsfolk. Telling the people of Pious Pass not to be afraid, for she is Paralite.

And that is where we ended the last episode. I think it was Bart that charmed her. Yeah. I think it was. More than likely. Very charming. Did? Yeah. How did, was that pretty decent, Micah? I think I covered everything. B plus, A minus. All right. I think I covered everything pretty well. It's pretty good. I may have missed some of the finer pieces. Oh, I forgot Sordo. Oh.

You all got the sort of sphere when you were at sort of our little robot friend. Yeah. Before you came out to the two Pius pass, he was your alarm clock and he can give you insight. He's been sent with, he was a floating sphere that can answer some of your questions.

Oh, in the library in the tavern. That's right. Oh, wow. Kyborg and Gum-Gum got bullied by some Kenku, which is, I can't believe I forgot that. That's some of my favorite D&D ever that I've experienced. And Bart proved his lady man's prowess in flirting at the tavern.

What was her name? Hops. Hops. Right? Yeah. I like that that's a detail you remember, Barb. I remember all the leaves. The hot chick that you tried to flirt with. I think we had Mariel playing hops too, so it's fitting. Oh, did we? Yeah. I think so.

So good. All right. Well, that's roughly a recap of the first eight episodes. If you haven't listened to them, you really should go listen. I think that they're really, really entertaining. I think they're really fun to listen to. A lot more bite-sized than some other D&D real play podcasts. You know, it's a lot more streamlined, a lot easier to listen to. And I think that the editing job and the post-production that Ben and Micah put into it is absolutely incredible. When...

Mudd gets his haircut, there's a three-minute long song that's produced and sang specifically for Mudd's character. If I had known that, I would have gotten a haircut. I wanted a gun run song.

this is why you got to be a yes man yes uh yeah i think uh we've been having a lot of fun with it and i'm excited to see where the next episodes are going to go so throughout all of this y'all were level one and two right before we started recording this you all were leveling up to level three for our next arc uh do y'all want to talk about some of the level three stuff that you all acquired and uh where you see the character going now that you're level three i think it'd be helpful just because i don't think we all know even what each other did yeah would

What'd you do, Bart? So I got to add a couple things as a third level. I got to choose what college I went to. Where'd you go? I went to the College of Glamour. Yes, great. Thank you very much. And what that did is it gave me... That's a party college. A party college. It gave me a couple things. It gave me Mantle of Inspiration, which...

I could use as a bonus action. And this essentially I could choose a number of creatures that I could see within 60 feet up to a number equal to my charisma modifier, which is very high, by the way, because I'm very charismatic.

And all those people get a temporary five hit points. Okay, so it's a party buff. Yeah, party buff. Party buff, party school. Yeah, party college. And then I also got enthralling performance.

Which... Real fast, I do want to add, in addition to that mantle of inspiration, it also, once you give them the temporary hit points, it also allows them to immediately, as a reaction, to move. So we all get a movement option. Yeah, so it's like they gain temporary hit points, and then they can immediately move up to their speed without provoking attack of opportunity. To do the coordinated dance we all know we do together. Exactly. Yeah.

Something that I learned in glamour school. Sorry, just wanted to make sure that we were clear about that. No, that's a good point. What's your enthralling thing? Enthralling performance. So if I perform at least one minute, I can attempt to inspire wonder in my audience by singing, reciting a poem, or dancing.

At the end of the performance, I choose a number of humanoids within 60 feet who watched and listened to it. A number equal to my charisma modifier. And then each target must succeed a wisdom saving throw against my spell or they're charmed by me. And so if they're charmed, they idolize me, which, you know, everyone does in this game. So that's, you have the D&D version of the dance off they did in Guardians of the Galaxy. Exactly. Okay.

And I also got to add two expertise proficiencies. So I added stealth and performance, which makes my stealth and performance even more proficient. So very, very high. And then I also got to add an extra spell, which I did. I added invisibility to my spells. And I also added... I took away...

Something that I had for healing and I added cloud of daggers as well, which I fill the air with spinning daggers and a cube of five feet on each side centered on a point you choose within range. A creature takes four D4 slashing damage when it enters the spells area for the first time on a turn or starts its turn there. So it's a little little bit of damage stuff that I added as well to Bart.

Because he wants to help fight. So it's a spinning dagger. It's going to keep five feet on each side. So yeah, you're basically putting that on one person essentially. Yes. But then like it stays there. And I did want to point out just so the audience is clear and everyone understands. Like for enthralling performance where you charm people, it doesn't seem like it's something you could typically do in combat. But it's definitely something you can do for like in a role-playing scenario since you need to perform for a minute. Gotcha.

And yeah, just so people, if people don't know how D&D works, I think each turn is supposed to take six seconds. So if you were performing for a minute, that means you would have to perform for 10 turns straight. Wow. In combat. So do we want to go over anything maybe that you've started? I know I asked you about your level three stuff, but do we want to go over any of your earlier stuff? Like we never really talked about like level one and level two abilities as well. Like some of the things that Bart could do to begin with to get up to this

point um so i had bardic inspiration so as a bonus action a creature other than myself within 60 feet that can hear me uh gains an inspiration die 1d6 for 10 minutes the creature can add it to one ability check attack roll or saving throw and this could be added after seeing the roll but before knowing the outcome and this is how you normally pat people on the butt for good luck right nope that's me that that's you that's my damn it

But I could add that in as a trait. I could aspire to be more like mud. I did it on the roof with kyborg. You did do it once. I didn't think I was totally crazy. But yeah, I did pat him on the butt before he jumped. And I also have song of rest. So that means if me or any friendly creature who could hear my performance regains hit points at the end of the short rest by spending one or more hit dice. Each of those creatures regains an extra 1d6 hit points.

Oh, neato. Yeah. And then my spells include Mage Hand, Minor Illusion, Charm Person, Comprehend Languages, Dissonant Whispers, Healing Word, and Sleep. But I changed that for level three. So now I have Mage Hand, Minor Illusion, Charm Person, Comprehend Language, Dissonant Whispers, Sleep, Cloud of Daggers, and Invisibility. And Invisibility is a level two spell, right? That's your first level two spell, I believe? So is Cloud of Daggers. So both of those are second level. Oh, so it's Cloud of Daggers. Nice. Yeet, yeet.

I'm magical. Yeah. Even though I'm so short.

All right. Who wants to go next? How about Gum Gum? Well, Gum Gum leveled up. He got some more health. I don't know if I want to say what he... I don't think he's aware of anything happening. And I don't know if I want to say. So maybe some kind of blatant inner power. That sounds like too ominous. Like blatant inner talent. Yeah. Whatever. When he leveled up, if something happened, he didn't realize it. Hmm.

Feels a little tickle inside. Yeah. Well, why don't you talk about what we do know then, what you've used and what you've had up until this point. Well, he's a barbarian. He's very much physically strong. He's got not so intelligently strong weapons.

And he Raging where he just gets advantage on strength checks and really strong melee and halves his damage and basically becomes a damage sponge. And he can Reckless Attack and he's dangerous. He's a very dangerous sense. You know, he's like a wild animal in that respect.

When he's raging. But that, I mean, that's a, he just attacks. He doesn't have any, like, special abilities. He attack and he protect? Yeah, and, well, I mean, he has, he thinks he has special abilities, at least. He tries magic. Micah points out that it seems like Gum-Gum's very grabby. Oh, he is grabby. But not in, like, an inappropriate way. Uh...

Yeah, he's grab-grab. I mean, in combat, he doesn't really like killing things, so he tries to disarm or hold and, you know. If I remember right, you recently tried to pick up one enemy to use that enemy as a weapon and swing them at another one. Okay, yeah, he was raging. Yeah.

Yeah. So he does, you know, when he gets ragey, he gets a little more like violent, but like he doesn't really like hurting things. I picture it's like that scene at the end of the Avengers when Hulk picks up Loki and starts like smashing him around. Yeah. Except for I don't think he was successful in doing it. No, but I mean, that's my picture. You're trying. That's what he tried in that moment. Yeah. Yeah.

Alright, is that everything you feel like? Does that encompass your abilities up to this point? As far as Gum Gum knows, yeah. Alright. Or like, I mean, besides his magic that he just hasn't quite figured out. Who's next? We got Mud and Kyborg still to go. Go, Kyborg.

Okay, I got something called a marital archetype, so I took on a wife. Marshall. Marshall. It's Marshall. Marshall archetype. I took on Arcane Archer, and this is a decision not made lightly. I have things like Battlemaster.

Purple Dragon Knight, Samurai to choose from. A lot of big names. So you chose Arcane Archery? Yeah, just because I think that that should be my main focus. I'm the sniper guy. The audience should know it took about 45 minutes to come to this decision. I was also looking for really good songs to tell my backstory to. Well, he's getting married, Gus. He's getting married. Something about nature and prestidigitation. Yeah.

Anyways, the cool stuff is I got these cool new attacks like Bursting Arrow and Seeking Arrow. Bursting Arrow, I think it explodes on an enemy, and Seeking Arrow is like a magic arrow that chases after people. You ever see that 80s movie with Tom Selleck, Runaway? Gene Simmons was the bad guy, the villain. No, that sounds awesome. Runaway. It's a great movie, but...

In that movie, like I said, Gene Simmons is a bad guy. He's got a gun that has bullets that chase people, like they go around a corner and stuff to hit people. Oh, is this that future movie that you were telling me about a while ago? Yeah. Yeah, this sounds awesome, dude. And that's what secret arrows for arcane archers make me think about. It's like this arrow that can go around corners and find its target. This is like the Biest Bee movie.

I'm looking at it now and it looks incredible. Well, I know what I'm going to be doing tonight. Wanted. It's not a great movie by any stretch of the imagination, but if you're looking for like a B sci-fi movie, it'll fill that desire. If we're talking about like crappy action movies, I think that my arrows are going to be less like the wanted arrows and more sentient like the dagger from the shadow. Have you seen the shadow? Oh, yeah, I guess. Guardians of the Galaxy.

Galaxy. Gay, gay, gay, gay, gay. Um, hands up the gay, gay, gay, gay, gay. But I think it's more of a, uh, yeah. The shadow 1994. You never saw it. What? Never saw it. It's got a, what's his face? Alec Baldwin. Oh, I remember. I just never saw it. Is that all of your new stuff that came up with level three? Uh, I mean, like I said, Prestidigitation, something about nature versus our kind. I got nature, uh,

Oh, I guess I got some health. And I already had second wind, arcane shot, arcane shot. Why don't we talk about what you had then? Your level one and your level two stuff. Yeah, yeah, yeah. So I mostly went into it. I'm a fighter. I wanted to do a lot of stuff with archery. I got cool things like second wind, which gives me bonus action to regain health and action surge. Yeah, I don't know. I'm pretty strong, but I'm also dumb. A lot of dumb people on this team, huh? Yeah.

In a good way. So, all right. I know I feel like that was one of the things you were worried about was your kind of dumbness when you were leveling up trying to figure out what you were best suited for with your intelligence and wisdom. Yeah, because apparently Arcana is connected to wisdom and I am not a wise man. So I was worried that that was going to affect it somehow. But, you know, YOLO. I can always go back and train to be a samurai if I wanted to, I guess. Well, sometimes it's like you want to do what makes the most sense for the character.

You know, it's not necessarily about like min maxing for the game. It's about what makes more sense story wise. Yeah.

I really want to watch The Shadow now. The movie's so cool. I just looked it up. That movie came out in 1994. It starred Alec Baldwin, so you would think it's a big-budget movie. The budget was $40 million. You can make a movie with Alec Baldwin for $40 million in 1994. That's kind of crazy to me. Yeah, I had the action figure. It's really cool. He pulled up his guns. He went... That leaves Mud. Yeah, level three Mud was basically just adding a few spells to his preparation.

prepared spells you got second spell slots so maybe hopefully laying down some more damage

Ben's looking at my level two guy. Yeah. At level two, I got wild shape, which allows me to turn into any beast. I don't know what the CR of it stands for, but there's like this, these levels that beasts are. Challenge rating. Challenge rating. Any beast that's challenge rating one or below, I can turn into as long as I've seen it. Hence why I've called out that I saw the camel and the mastiff. I think I should be able to turn into a hamster too. That's just my opinion. But so that's, that was basically level two. And,

Level 3 was adding some new spells. Mud has his cantrips from prior times, which is he has guidance, the butt slapping thing. I basically buff somebody's roll. Then I have shape water, which I really haven't used yet. Been trying to find a time to use it, but not yet. Then as far as spells, I have absorb elements.

Cure wounds, earth tremor, ice knife, and then I added heat metal, which basically means if I see someone wearing metal or holding a metal weapon, I can kind of heat it up like Superman, heat vision style, and they take damage. And then they even have to roll to see if they can even get it off. And if they can't get it off or drop it, they still keep taking damage. It's kind of cool. Like you said, it's like a vision thing. You don't even have to touch it. You just have to see it, and then you can make it happen.

It has to be a manufactured metal object. That's the description. So it's like a weapon or armor, that kind of thing. And I like that because that's kind of like a counter to my ice knife. A little bit of all the elements in there since I have earth tremor as well and the...

Yeah. Entangle. I'm Captain Planet. Thank you very much. You need some wind action. I know, I do. But I do have some heart action in that I get to summon a beast now. So I can basically summon a little bestial spirit friend and I choose like the element of their environment, either air, land or water. And that determines what kind of creature I summon. And they get to hang out with me. And

be a little helper and have my same initiative and can help me in battle and that kind of stuff. So I'm all about them friends. And then one of my favorite things I got that's not very offensive, but it's kind of a little helpful thing for maybe some of the stuff that we do often, which is sneaking around. And I got Pass Without Trace.

And basically, I can cause this veil of shadows, as it's called, that gives... How many people can I do it to? It's any creature within 30 feet of you. Any creature that I choose 30 feet from me that has plus 10 bonus to dex, which is like stealth checks, and can't be tracked except by magical means. You leave behind no tracks or other traces of your passage. So...

Would have been helpful when we were trying to break into a store. And yeah, that's Mudd's additions. I think that's about it. Mudd has a bunch of also a lot of racial traits that I keep forgetting to use. Like I can talk to animals and plants. I can understand them apparently. Speech of beast and leaf. But I can talk to them. Haven't used that yet.

Also, keep forgetting I have hidden step, which basically means I can turn invisible in GTFO. But yeah. The speech of Beast and Leaf also gives you advantage on charisma checks to influence them. I feel like that would have been really handy when the Mastiff was chasing you. Oh yeah, it would have been. There's too many things on my sheet. I gotta be more... I think that's one of the things that...

I think D&D does well is it gives, I mean, it does overload you with a lot of abilities, but it meters them out early on. Like you have to spend a lot of time with them, get to know them before you start getting more and more powerful abilities. So hopefully now, like you'll remember, this is in your arsenal of things.

All right. Well, I think that about wraps it up. I think that covers everything we wanted to do. We're so powerful. Yeah. You all are really powerful. You're getting there. You're learning your characters and going to learn everything on those sheets and you're going to beat all the bad guys. Beat all the bad guys.

So I want to thank everyone for listening. And we'll have some new episodes here real soon for you. So just to let everyone know, we're actually going to be off. There's going to be no new episode July 6th. We're going to take a little bit of time working on some new stuff. That means we're going to be back July 13th with the start of an all new arc. It's going to be great. In the meantime, keep up with us on social media at StinkyDragonPod.

And send us some tweets. Send us some engagement. Hashtag StinkyDragonPod as well. And we might use your name in an upcoming episode. In fact, I've got to review some names right now and pick some. So hurry up. Do it. You still have time. Thanks for listening, everybody. Bye. Bye. Bye.