Shownotes Transcript
This podcast is supported by FX's English Teacher, a new comedy from executive producers of What We Do in the Shadows and Baskets. English Teacher follows Evan, a teacher in Austin, Texas, who learns if it's really possible to be your full self at your job, while often finding himself at the intersection of the personal, professional, and political aspects of working at a high school. FX's English Teacher premieres September 2nd on FX. Stream on Hulu.
Welcome to Boulder Ray, most famous for being the hometown of the legendary heroes, the Infinites, a brave foursome that answers the plights of countless realms from every kind of peril. Four novice adventurers travel to Boulder Ray to apply for the coveted Infinite internship in hopes that perhaps they can become legendary heroes themselves. I want to be the most legendary hero. What class would that be? Whatever you do, do not play a bard. But my name is Barbara. Bard-bara. It's the perfect fit, Gus.
Can I give my guy a robot arm? What? Why? Because he's a cyborg. No, there's no cyborgs in Dungeons and Dragons. Then he's a kyborg. Oh my God. So can I make my guy think that he is a wizard? Do you just not want to play a wizard? No,
No, no, no. In his heart, he's a wizard. But he's actually a barbarian. On his outside, he's a barbarian. On his inside, he's a wizard. Just in his heart. Not even the inside. It's all barbarian, but they're in his heart. You know, he's a half-orc, but he doesn't know what that other half is. So he's half-orc and he thinks he might be half-wizard? Exactly. That wizard's not a race in D&D. He doesn't know that.
Oh, God. Okay, if I'm playing a druid, like, what are the limitations on what animals can I turn into? Can I turn into an octopus? Oh, why? Can I turn into a kangaroo? No. What breed of dogs can I be and what breeds can't I be? You'll be the goodest boy no matter what, John. Okay. Oh, God, no. Okay.
All right. We're already off the wheels. I'm going to try to do my best to keep you guys on track. Don't mess with me too much. No promises. No promises. So go look for Tales from the Stinky Dragons, our new Dungeons & Dragons audio podcast. It's available wherever you listen to podcasts. First episode's out now, so go look for it. Subscribe, and you'll get new episodes as soon as they're available. Find out what's going on in Boulderay, who are the Infinites, and how bad are these guys going to mess with me while playing D&D.
And am I a wizard? No. In your heart of hearts. You're a wizard, Gum-Gum. Is your character named Gum-Gum? That's his given name. So yes, that's his name then.
