cover of episode College Bathrooms Suck

College Bathrooms Suck

Publish Date: 2023/6/19
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College bathrooms are absolutely disgusting, bro. A lot of people are making videos on like high school bathrooms and stuff like that, so I figured, why not talk about college bathrooms? Because living in the filth was really a whole nother experience. Like, I had to shower in these things. Yeah, seriously, it was bad. And now honestly, I think college bathrooms scarred me for life. Like, there's just no going back.

And it truly just was a tough experience when I was a freshman in college. I lived there right like I lived on campus now Everybody on my floor shared like two different bathrooms now There were a lot of people on my floor and it was just unfortunate now the showers in the college bathrooms were just so disgusting you have to play a little ass game of Rude Olette to figure out which one to take like hmm do I pick the one with the snot rockets the pubes on the shower drain or

The hangover throw up. I'll go with the snot rockets. Yeah, I'm not even kidding. Some dude left his cubes on the shower tray. Come on, little bro. Clean up after yourself. But I already know he was using Manscaped to get the job done. This video is sponsored by Manscaped. Manscaped is a really well-established men's grooming kit. And of course, what they're known for is ball shaving. And I'm not gonna lie.

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Either that or some dude would have his JBL going. Or sometimes both. Yo, I don't know who you are in the other stall, but how's life, man? Ah, shit. What do I even say to him at this point? Do I just ignore him? I don't know what to do. Uh, it's great, man. Yeah. How's yours? Great. You know, I'm feeling amazing. I smoked a little bit. I'm ready for class. That's cool. Uh, bro, did you think about like ever how much time we spend in school? Like we spend at least six hours a day in school. So that means, bro, if we do the math for like 16 years, we're in school. Bro, I'm

I'm not trying to hear that right now. Like I am in the shower posted up in the nude. Like I don't think I need to be in a philosopher level conversation right now. Like I think the philosophical conversation can wait. Or sometimes the two people like in the other stalls were having a conversation with each other while I was just awkwardly taking a shower. And some of these motherfuckers were talking about the weirdest shit. Like bro, if the showers weren't already bad enough, goddamn. But being dead serious though, the best part of the showers is when somebody would just start blasting that drill music.

early in the morning, bro. I really needed that to wake my ass up, bro. Because I already know that I was just gonna be walking around like a goddamn zombie getting up for my 8 a.m. class. Because ain't no way I'm gonna be functioning if I have to study for some tests late at night and then I get to get up 8 a.m. to take the goddamn thing. For the people that did bring the JBL and put on, like, some drill music, thank you. And for the people that put on some doo-doo-ah music...

Why? Why did you do it? Either that or I'd hear some podcast going on it. Now, unfortunately, it felt like once in a blue moon, the janitor was in there cleaning because it was just impossible to keep that thing clean. Like there was no keeping it clean. If he cleaned the bathroom on a Sunday night, by Monday morning, it would already be dirty. But I can't...

imagine being the janitor like i don't blame him coming in like once a month cleaning that bro like i experienced trauma just using the bathroom but imagine cleaning that nah that's so tough if i spawned in as a bathroom janitor i don't know what i would do in my life like i'd be getting crazy ass flashbacks of like on the wall and whatever else now the showers that was one thing

Alright, but the toilets were even worse. I swear, motherfuckers really had some stormtrooper aim trying to piss in the bowl. It was crazy. I'd have to collect more germs than a goddamn doorknob on my ass. Like, it was crazy. I really had to wipe down the toilet seat just to hopefully save my ass from catching some kind of disease. When I'd sit down, I'd feel a little shiver up my spine. Like, ugh. But, I mean, I wasn't really a germaphobe by any means, but let's just say college bathrooms kind of turn me into a germaphobe.

Like, it really made me do the most to keep everything clean in my house and shit like that. Like, Mr. Clean might have some competition, bro. I just need to lose the hair first. You never really know what substance you're gonna find on the goddamn toilet. I mean, I've seen shit literally smeared on the wall. And I've seen a white stain, kind of similar to Elmer's glue. Like, on that roll that holds the toilet paper.

Wow. I can't believe people are actually that down bad, bro. That's crazy. You really gotta crank one out in the college bathroom, bro. That's crazy. As soon as I saw some dude blow a load on the fucking toilet paper roll thing, I'm like, yeah, I'm done. I'm not going back in here. I'm dipping out of the bathroom for the day.

I'm done. And now where did I go to the bathroom instead? Well, there were other buildings with much cleaner bathrooms, luckily, or else I would have been found pissing in the woods. Like, no doubt. And sometimes the entire bathroom was out of order, which was extremely tough. That meant the entire floor was walking in and out of the bathroom, bro.

And you thought getting a shower was tough before? Well, yeah, sure, you could kiss that goodbye. Yeah, the toilets, let's just say they really did suck. Like, I don't know what it was, but they were out of order, like, at least once a month. Now, as for the sinks and, like, the soap dispensers and shit like that, well, I was in my freshman year around the time of the devious lick trend. So, let's just say some of them got stolen.

I'm gonna leave it at that. I don't know who did it, but let's just say there were some menaces on my floor, bro. Now what's crazy is that like, from what I've heard, the girls' bathroom had none of these problems. So walking in there is just like walking into a luxurious, clean estate with plenty of toilets and clean showers. But the boys

bathroom on the other hand you're walking into straight must there's no in between but can we just talk about how many people missed the goddamn trash can i don't think it's that hard to like pick it up and put it in the trash can i don't know these act like they're a d1 basketball player clearly these can't piss in a toilet bowl i don't know why they think they're going d1 and trash basketball

If you're gonna shoot it, at least make it, bro. Somebody really be posted up hitting buckets with their goddamn, their takeout container, and then the food spills all over the floor. And I'm just like, "Oh my god." And it didn't help that the trash can was overflowing, so that meant there was like paper towels and a bunch of other shit like that on the floor.

Now the struggle was real when I was getting Chipotle from Uber Eats and I had to go in there a lot. And one time I went in there to wash my hands right after a nice meal. I was getting Uber Eats like every day because the food was kind of booty cheeks as well. So there was no there was no winning living here. There was just black shit chilling in the sink. I don't know what it was. I really couldn't tell you. I don't know if it was like coal or something like I really had no idea. But it was in like two or three of the sinks and it was just tough because I was like

what the fuck? And I was like, holy shit, everything about this bathroom's dirty as hell. Like there's no getting out of it. And not only were the physical objects dirty as hell, but the air was too. How was that even possible? I don't know, but it always smelled musty no matter what. I mean, it's a bathroom, a bathroom's going to smell musty, but it also had that strawberry smell or

Mango, wherever the hell. It just always smelled like a vape in there 24-7. There was no getting out of it. I mean, sure, it kind of did smell better than must. I'm not gonna lie, but I'm not trying to inhale nicotine 24-7. You know what I'm saying? I already inhale it enough at like college events or sometimes even just walking around on campus. It's crazy. And now I really don't know what was worse, like the bathrooms themselves or trying to do laundry in college. Oh my God, that shit was ass. There were literally only three machines in our big ass building with like, I don't even know how many rooms, bro.

And of course, everything in the building was booty cheeks. Like, everything was faulty, bro. So sometimes one or two of them would be out of order. So it was basically impossible to get a laundry machine. It was either they were all full or they were all clear. Like, again, there was no in between at all. Or sometimes people were the biggest ops in the laundry room.

Sometimes they would take your shit out of the dryer, even if it was still drying, and you'd be left with like wet soggy clothes. And I would just be like, "Oh my." But the most awkward thing is whenever you'd walk in on somebody touching your clothes. That was so awkward. Like,

What do you even do at that point? Like, if they catch your ass, like, what do you even do? Like, sometimes people leave their clothes in there for hours, and then as soon as they come back, you're just in there fucking going through their clothes trying to get them out of the laundry machine. That's just unfortunate, bro.

So if you do do that, you really gotta be careful. You can't be caught lacking. So if you are the type of person to do that, you gotta really look and be like, oh shit, are they coming? Because that's really awkward if you get caught touching their clothes. Now, all in all, living at college, it was booty cheeks, bro. Like, I ain't gonna hold you. Like, I really was inhaling nicotine 24-7. There really was no getting out of it, man. And the food is another story. That shit was garbage. Maybe a video on school lunch sometime in the future. I don't know. Want another video to watch? Watch this video on screen. Anyways, I'm out. Bye.