Theme Park Phobias & Home Decor Tips with Brittany Broski and Trixie
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Can I tell you something that happened to me that's very horny? Oh, please. Okay, so I got the new Apple Watch, the Apple Watch Ultra. Bitch, this like Barbie Dreamhouse sparkly wristband. I love it. Yeah, well, it's like the exercise climbing adventure watch. So all the straps were like...

Green canvas. And I was like. No, they love stone. Yeah. Stone. Pebble. That's not white. That's pebble. Sand. Yeah. So then I went on Amazon and went. Oh, I shouldn't say Amazon. Whatever. Why? I know we're not supposed to support big, big stores and that's a big store. So I don't know. I live in fear. You obviously don't have fans that cancel you. Oh, I do trust. Trust. They do. By the way, we're here with Dog the Bounty Hunter today. Oh.

The lovely second alternate called Absolute Last Minute. I know! When one of my insane blonde friends has COVID, I call the other one. You know, I almost was like, give me a short, ugly wig. I can cosplay as Katya. You know we have them. Oh, we know you have them, girl. You want a short, ugly wig? Were you going to take your extensions out?

That would just be six pieces of brown hair under this fucking extension. I forgot what I was just saying. It doesn't matter. We have Brittany in the studio today. Can you believe it? We have a monitor here and lately I tend to look at the monitor like it's camera one. I don't know what that is. I also love that's your camera. I love to. Yeah, you do love to do that. Make an appearance. Do it. It feels freeing. I'm going to do that too. I'm going to sit like this actually for the rest of the episode. But then you have to see the back of my head. So I'm actually not going to do that. Or like when Kachi says something I don't think is true. I'm like.

Yeah, I just pop right in. Katya has COVID and I called the most capable, hilarious, beautiful, fun person that I knew at a last minute. Well, with Katya, there's a certain amount of trust where we can go in unprepared. And with you, I also feel that trust. I do feel that. Why did you say it so Southern? I feel that trust. I feel that trust in the Lord. I feel that trust in the Lord.

Can we talk about the elephant in the room? The mermaid hair. Thank you so much. You want to know something? I went to see Mrs. Beyonce Giselle Carter Knowles. Two nights ago. Yep. I went Saturday and Monday and I had a professional hairstylist do my hair. So this is just that from two days ago. Still clipped? Clipped? Tape ends. Wow. Those last? They do. They do.

They do. I get them moved up every like six weeks. It's really riveting stuff. I get them moved up every six weeks and they like touch up my highlights too. And you could never tell that this isn't growing out of my head. You could never tell. Unless I turn around and you see the back of my head. Have you ever had them and then taken them out and do you get like phantom limb syndrome? I do. I like find myself doing this and I'm like, there's no hair there. It's all falling out. Oh, literally. No bitch. When he takes them out and I, it's like, uh, what's, you know, that scene from Narcos, the like screenshot of Pablo Escobar standing in the pool, just like,

like contemplating his life. That's when he takes my extensions out. I look in the mirror like, fuck me. Cause they're just pulling out my hair, you know, but it's like, you have to add the hair to be able to pull out the hair. And it's so heavy. And my hair is so thin. And he takes it out and I'm like, this is the real you bitch. I know. Under the mask. You are quite the beauty though. You really are. You want me so bad. No, you are. You are, you know, Brittany is one of those people that she's very comfortable being in the world outside of her drag. Absolutely. And not all women feel that way. Well,

Well, because here's the thing. This... Welcome to my face. Here's the thing. This is my fucking face, bitch. I know. You know, like there's not... I've made peace with it.

What else am I supposed to do? By the way, if you don't follow Brittany's TikTok, it's really amazing. She is the queen of TikTok. And the other day you posted one where someone said you looked like the actor from Young Frankenstein. You can say it, Marty Feldman. And you said, Marty Feldman, let me just check on this. And you looked up the picture of Marty Feldman, who, by the way, is...

Two eyes looking in completely different directions. Put it nicely. Wall-eyed. Wall-eyed, which is fine. I think we need to talk more about people having... Not everyone's eyes both look in the same direction. You know what? And it's fine. And that's a privilege to have your eyes look in the same direction. It's fine. I'm not a shallow person. It's fine.

If your eyes don't look in the same direction, I still see you. Right. That's not how I meant it. I see you and you're valid. That's not how I meant it. I see you and you see someone else too. That's not how I meant it. I really meant it like I see you. And you see everything. Try to do something nice on the channel. No, being wall-eyed I think is a secret superpower. 100%. By the way, a lot of people can be wall-eyed on accident.

um courtney act and chime in courtney if you're here she has the ability to become walleye she says sometimes if she looks at her iphone too close her eyes will go like this i can do that too but you know it was a jarring realization for me to have my followers point out just sort of sitting your eyes go two different ways and i was like that is crazy you're like why aren't they ever like you know who you look like sophia loren like why is it never that why is it the yellow eminem and

Because they love to see me suffer. They really do. How do you think I feel? I've lost, let's see, I lost like 25 pounds. And it's one thing to be like, you look great. It's another thing to be like, I used to look at you and throw up. And lately, I just want to throw up. Exactly. So good for you. No, exactly. It's like, you know, I used to not think you were human. Right.

And you know, in full drag with your extensions and lashes, makeup professionally done. Yeah, bitch. You might pass for a man, a human man. Yes! And you're like, thank you. It really is jarring too. And like, I'm trying to, you know, not to get too serious for a second, but like, I kind of have brought it upon myself to show that doing this, you know, like we're funny people naturally. That's kind of how I am. That's a part of me always. But there's so many other things that,

And I want to be able to show that and have a space where people are like, okay, I can't take you seriously when you da-da-da. You know, it's like if you think this is how we are all the time, you're smoking crack. Like that's not real. No, when you and I get together off camera, we talk a lot of like real life stuff. Yeah, and it's so nice. We talk about things like self-doubt, friendships. Like we get deep right away. So are you talking about me or someone else? I said friendship. Let's take a break. Ah!

Six minutes in. We made it six minutes before you pissed me off, bitch. Have you seen that TikTok? It's like four seconds. It took four fucking seconds for you to piss me off. You seen that? No. It's like this kid in high school who like rears up and he goes, four seconds. Roll the clip. Four fucking seconds. Put the clip in. It took you four fucking seconds to piss me off again. Remember when you did a TikTok pod?

I did. Oh my God. You did a TikTok podcast. The official TikTok podcast. Yeah, girl. No one listened to it. Well, it's hard. I mean, podcasting is hard because it's a very saturated thing. Yep. Kati and I, luckily, I don't know what we do right here, but we just try not to overthink it. We just try to keep doing it. And that's the beauty. It's the magic of just listening to two friends talk. And y'all are like, mentally, I would say not all there or well. So that definitely helps the sort of dynamic. The kicker is over time.

She's become the stable one Like as one supreme grows stronger the other goes weaker like she used to be like she was eight years older than me and she was like more famous than me and like but so crazy and so up and down in her life that I was always like I'm the young ambitious one who keeps us on the rails and she's like the wild one Yeah, and now I'm like she's a homeowner who's sober who just wants to like watch movies and

And now I'm like, could we carve out some time to cry today? You know, she's like, are you calling me to cry again? Like, so she's the normal one. I'm the crazy one. She's the Supreme. I guess that fucking that she's the Choco Taco Supreme. Exactly. I was going to say the Supreme. And today's special guest is Jessica Lange. I would. Could you imagine? She walked in and said, get the hell out of my chair, you bald faggot.

You would get up. You'd say, sorry. I thought you were talking to me. Wait, I'm so sorry, actually. Oh, my God. Oh, my God. I was with Juno Birch, friend of you, friend of me. Of course, of course. I was with Juno Birch. We were at a drag show. And the person on the microphone went... Juno was in like a little jacket with like a little... You know, like a 2000s Fergie, like newsboy hat? Yeah, yeah, yeah. It's like a big baggy Fergie hat. I don't know what to call it. And the person on the microphone goes, that man over there. And she's pointing at me. And Juno goes... And I was like, she's obviously pointing at me, not you. What?

But I think somebody could walk up and say, move you bald faggot. And you would go, received. Heard it. Thank you. Yeah, I would say. I'm sorry I was in the way. Yeah. Yeah. So what have you been up to, gal? Girl.

Well, I'm doing my show, which, listen, and we need to just put it out there into the universe. I've been saving you. You don't know this and your team doesn't know either as the special guest at the end for my medieval talk show. It's been like, it's so funny because I feel like I haven't even talked to you about this, but everyone on my team, I'm like, okay, so Trixie is going to be like one of the last episodes of the season. So we can lock that in. I haven't mentioned it to you.

By the way, which is how I booked this yesterday. Can you come in tomorrow? On my way. Yeah. And then I think you text. Are you going to be in hair and makeup? Did you text me that? When? Yesterday. Sorry. I just haven't. I have an Apple watch. Is that the pizza delivery coming? Can I tell you, this is my third or fourth Apple watch. I break them and lose them. You have to plug them in at night and I leave them in hotels.

And then when I leave and call, they can't find them. Oh, of course. Or I smash them. But this one's supposed to be like titanium. So it's supposed to be unkillable. I called Sia and I checked. You called the Pitch Perfect cast. Yeah, I called Sia and I checked up on her. So what was that? Great. I just talked to her recently, actually. She's a vibe. I said, what was that? Ow, Sia. It was work text.

about something you and I just filmed together. Oh, gorgeous. Gorgeous. With so much fun. Brittany and I just did something cool coming up. So I've been seeing so many clips on those, your medieval talk show. Yeah, bitch. It makes the rounds on TikTok. And I'm so like, cause this has been my kind of baby for a long time. Like,

Because it takes so long to produce. I'm completely self-funding this show. We have no one backing it. It's living on my YouTube channel because I wanted this to kind of be like my chicken shop date, my hot ones. Like, this is my show that celebrities come on. And Orville was the first guest, of course. Of course. The way we use and abuse him, bitch. Girl, the way I call him in for any sort of heterosexual credibility...

Because cool people like him. I don't have it. Celebrities like him. Fashion people like him. Exactly. Meanwhile, you and I are like, hey, will you come dumpster dive in our show? Please. I know you're at Fashion Week. I know you're at the Grammys. No, it's so... Can you come eat shit with me? It's so humbling to ask him to. I know. Literally, I'm like, I know you're at the like...

What the fuck was he? I saw him at the Christian Cowan show in New York. And I was like, I know you're literally walking the runway. Oh, I know. But could you come film this in this back alley studio in Hollywood? Yeah. Also, I have no money to pay you and there's no dressing room. And he's like, fucking guess. Yeah.

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So what happens on your medieval show? Tell the children about it. It's so great. Well, thank you so much. You've never seen an episode. That's not true. I watched the Drew episode. Oh my God. That's so nice. You and Drew get together. I'm watching it. And that's actually so true. Drew is one of the funniest people I've ever met. And I know it's not relevant. Gorgeous. Gorgeous. She knows how to put her fucking hair and makeup on bitch. And she knows that sometimes, yeah, she can be wall-eyed and she just kind of knocks it back into place.

Well, she sort of has the reverse. Well, you guys both have this experience where you became known to people in a very like t-shirt at home casual way. So then when people see you glammed up, they're like, yup, yup, yup. So you guys have a nice situation because you weren't presented as porn stars, but you have the ability. Exactly. I could drop that OnlyFans link at any time and make probably like 20 bucks a month. At least. Honey, at least.

Can I tell you, 90% of people on OnlyFans, I believe are the statistic, make under $750 a month, I think. $750? That's crazy. So when people say top 1%, it's like 90% still don't make... Right. It's not livable. Right. Which is fine. And by the way, if you want to have sex on the internet and not have it be your primary income, that's also fine. Right. We need to move toward a world where people can truly do porn in their house and then be a school teacher the next day. Like...

Let people live. Their personal life is their personal life. This is Joe Biden's America. This is the future of everyone. I'm saying woke liberals. Well, I don't know. Like, I feel when I have friends who have private Instagrams, like, why? They're like, oh, because I'm a school teacher. And I'm like, oh, wait.

When you have certain jobs, it does. You don't want people to know what you did that weekend or whatever. Yeah. Or maybe you just don't want people you work with to know that much about you, which is also fine. And that's honestly, hey, I got fired because people knew too much about me. So that's true. What can you do? And you've been fired like 17, 18 times. A million times. I've been fired a million times.

That's so heartwarming though. Cause like getting fired is so humbling. But like when someone you look up to has also gone through that, it's like period bitch. Pre being Trixie full time, I was fired four different times and four different jobs, four different times majorly and cried.

What's funny is now my reputation in the world is you're like the hardest working person. You have 10 careers. Oh, how the turntables. And I'm like, well, why don't you tell that to everyone who ever fired me? Why don't you tell that to Mr. Ulta? Yeah. But to be honest, I didn't ever gel with like, if you're going to work at Macy's, if you clock in three minutes late, two times in a row, you're automatically terminated. I'm like, what are we doing here? Yeah. Girl, I used to go. No, no, no, no. I used to work at an insurance agency.

And I hated it and was miserable and wanted to die. I would do, because you have two like state mandated breaks. You have to take a day for 15 minutes, like during the day at any time. I would milk that shit. I'd go to the bathroom and I would take like 25 minute shit breaks because that's my me time. At one point, someone came into the women's bathroom, knocked on the stall and said, Brittany, shut up. And I said, I'm sitting there on my phone like this.

She goes, you're 10 minutes over your break. You need to get back to the desk. I said, I'm going to put a bullet in my skull. What about that? Have you thought about that? I literally went back to my desk and I was like, I'm like on my secret little incognito window looking up jobs.

On the flip side, too many people overly abuse things like that, which is why companies have to make laws like that. Because we all work with that one bitch who is no less than 15 minutes late every time. And I am not a late person. So I'm like, girl, what's going on there? You know where you live. And you know where you work. And you know how much time it takes. So what's going on?

Right. You're abusing it. You're abusing it. And that way, when you are late, you can walk into work guilt free because that's not you. Everyone knows like, oh, you're never late. It's fine. Exactly. If everyone else, if you're 15 minutes late every day, that means you're getting an hour of work a week. With a Starbucks in your hand and a fresh blowout. Yes. Yes. Being like, sorry, traffic. Or they walk in, sorry, traffic, and their nails are still drying. Exactly.

Sorry, can you get that for me? When I worked at Mac, it was hard because you would have to have like, you have to wear like a minimum of two lip products, three eye products, skin products. You have to have the perfume on that the store sells and you have your nails painted with a lacquer that Mac sells. Oh my God. And if, you know, like knowing it's like, oh, I'm supposed to clock in at noon and my nails aren't done. It'd be like 1158. I'm like,

shaking. It's all over your skin. Yeah, still fired though. Did you cry when you got fired? Oh, bald. Me too. It's something, it's a little bit like getting pulled over for me where it doesn't matter what it is. I'm crying. Yeah. Because what did I do wrong? I'm sorry. Yeah, I don't like, I know I'm supposed to be like a drag queen and be like, fuck the rules, fuck the noise, be your...

I like, I don't like breaking rules. I'm scared of getting in trouble. Me too. I'm scared of like, my worst nightmare is that I like take one too many items into a dressing room, you know? And I'm like, Oh God, they know I'm in here.

They're like, or TSA. I'm always like, there's a bomb in my bag. And I forgot I put it in there. Girl, the T is, the other T is when they swap your, they take that little tissue and swap your hands. You're like, they know. I said, what are you doing? And they go, well, check in for explosives. I said, this is a hand. This is an empty hand.

You think this is a stick of dynamite, bitch? Yeah, bitch. What are you talking about? What are you talking about? We have to rethink TSA. I think TSA employees... TSA needs to go to the red table with Jada. Pfft.

Like, we need to, like, condense and refake and re-strategize. I'm sorry. That shit's not keeping me safe. It's not. It's not. It's not. You're turning me into the villain. 100%. I think that we have demonized the TSA employees so much that they don't care if we live or die now.

And they're actually just trying to help us. Their job is to keep us safe. Because she yelled at me and now I'm going to cry. And then every country has their own different ones. Right. And then do you have TSA pre-check? You can't not have pre-check. You can't not have pre-check. Imagine waiting in line for an hour and a half at LAX. David Silver still doesn't have pre-check. And we'll fly somewhere together. And I'm like, baby, I love you.

I'm not going in that general. I'll see you on the other side, babe. I hope you make it. Why would he do that to you? I'm like, I hope you make it. Literally. I hope you dance. I hope you dance. Leanne Womack. Where is she? Bring her out. Kai, do you know we're watching? Have you ever watched Love is Blind? No, I have not. You got to watch it. It's bad. And that's the thing is like, I don't want to watch bad television. You do. There's a straight guy and he's like, my favorite song is I hope you dance by Leanne Womack. And I was like,

I felt strings like a puppet to God, like levitate me to the sky. A straight guy whose favorite song is I Hope You Dance by Leigh-Anne Womack, bitch. Are you at homecoming in 2004? What are you talking about? I can't take it. No, there's this thing on TikTok that's when a guy...

has clearly been with a straight woman who's like kind of fixed him a little bit and then they break up and then he's kind of out in the world by himself. There's the sound on TikTok that says someone cooked here and it's that where it's like if he's listening to Leanne Womack, there's another one that said a guy went on a date with a girl and they were trying to pick out outfits to wear together and he was like, is this a standing up jeans or a sitting down jeans kind of night? She goes, someone cooked here.

How do you know what that is? Is this a sitting down or standing up jeans? That's a girl thing of like, am I going to be like, are the jeans going to suck me in while I'm standing up? Or are we going to be at dinner where like, I need to have some wiggle room. Are we eating? Oh, because women's pants sit a little higher. Yes. And they cut into your gut where you can't breathe. So it's like, are they sitting down or standing up jeans? Girl. That's real. That's crazy. That's very real. Yeah. That's also, but that's drag. That's.

That is because I have my outfits for like Netflix where we sit on a chair this low and I'm like, well, I can't wear a steel bone corset. And if I am, I can only do one episode like that. So usually for those, it'll be like flowy 60s. But like if it's something where I'm going to get photographed standing up, I'm like, well, then we need to do the pigging. Exactly. Jesus Christ calls it the pigging. Putting on your body and your corset. She's like, it's time for the pigging. The pig is queening. The pig is queening. Yeah.

You know, people say that David and I are Miss Piggy and... Kermit. Kermit. But we are. You are? But I'm Kermit. He's Miss Piggy. Are you kidding me? That is true. That's really true. He's at home right now on the couch hungover watching Real Housewives of Salt Lake City while I'm here at work. While you're putting bread on the motherfucking table. Yeah. I'm going to get home and he's going to be like... And I'm going to be like, are you hungry? You know? Like, that's true. He walks into the room like this with his wig back. I'm like, I know I'm playing a fucking banjo.

Like he's the one entering the room like, here I am. Oh my God. Girl, you just moved. You sent me some videos of your new home. How's it going? Oh my God, bitch. Well, I actually FaceTimed you the other day because I'm having a time decorating my domicile. Right. Because I want it to be this like Western Hacienda fantasy of this sort of mixture of I love like fresh.

Maybe I like this like Spanish tile mixed with like a very Western cowboy. I don't want the Southwestern that kind of tends to lean very bad. Yes. And also like grandma, I'm not native, you know? And a lot of that is it's stealing native patterns and, and, and tribal prints and things like that. And I'm like, that's not, it doesn't sit right on my spirit. That's true. Avoiding that has been a kind of task, but, um,

I really love the cowhide and the leather and the upholstered and all that. And so I called you because I had a question about a cowhide rug mixed with cowhide seats. This is rich people stuff. No, it isn't. Decorating your own home is not rich people stuff. Well, yeah, but it's like... More people should feel empowered to do that. Like people sit in a house they don't love and they think the barrier is money. But so many things are not...

paint, thrifting. So many things can transform a space without spending our money. It's true. It's just like furnishing my own space for the first time ever. It's like, I've never had to think about this like this because I've never had the money to do it. I know. Like there are thrifty ways to do it. But when it comes to furnishing, you know, like we're doing antiquing and thrifting and stuff like that. But in Los Angeles... Girl, for...

And by the way, anything old in Los Angeles that's worth a damn is actually three times more than something new. Exactly. Everything antique here is so expensive. I found this beautiful sideboard at this antique shop in Agora that probably new or on an antique site would have been about $4,000. I got it for $350. Work, honey. Are you good at haggling?

Not really because I'm a people pleaser. If they're like, this is 6,000, I'm like, you got it? You want 7,000? You want more? Do you want me to hurt myself? Should I leave? Are you mad at me? Totally. Now in conflict, I think you're probably the same way where I would always rather apologize and say it was my fault to make the fight over. Always. Which is, I don't think long-term good.

Because my instinct during a fight or something is always, it's my fault. I did this. But if it smooths over the conflict without giving that person an ego of like, yeah, she did me wrong, then it's like... My desire to feel right, my desire for someone to go, you were right, is not very strong. My desire for the fight to be over is very strong. Period. A peacekeeper. Yeah. Do you know your personality type? Old? No. Gay. Bald.

Okay. Is there any other adjectives we can think of? Are you talking about like TMJ4 or whatever they call it? Yes. It's like ESPN, right? It's like a letter thing. Well, isn't in LA, isn't just personality type just Zodiac?

Pretty much, basically. But no, this is like, yeah, ESPN. What are you? I'm ENFJ. What does that mean? It's basically, we're very similar. But I know the girls in the comments are going to clock us. Like, no, it's not! ENFJ. ENFJ. Extra nasty. Neurotic. Oh, extra neurotic. Fuckable. Fuckable. Jugs. Jugs.

Yeah, 100%. I mean, that's me. Yep, that is you. Can I ask you a sex question? Sure. Have you ever done titty fucking? No, which is shocking because... Let's take a break. I'm kidding. Okay, we're back. We love to say let's take a break in the middle of a thought. Or when Katya's like, oh, that's when my friend died. I'm like, let's take a break. So we're back with titty fucking. You've never done it.

Because no one wants to, because you don't want to do the crunches. Like what's up? Because it seems athletic. It's so, bitch, sex is athletic. I'm not trying to do that. I'm trying to lay there, girl. Just let me do you. That's, being in a long relationship, sex does get more. Oh, just get it over with.

We're either being wilder or we're like, is there a way we can do this? We're both on our backs and it can be over in three minutes. Can we buy a machine? What is AI doing for self-pleasure? Girl, it's so funny because I feel like at least in gay world, maybe straight guys are like this, but they're like, oh, when I get a hold of you, we're going to fuck for hours. I'm like, no, we're not. You're going to pump and dump, bitch. Get out of my house. Also, I don't want that. Right. Do you think I want to fuck for 45 minutes? Yeah.

There's 24 hours in the day. Bitch, there's sweat pooling on my back thinking about fucking for 45 minutes. Yeah, 45 minutes. If we're not there in 45 minutes, we're not even attracted to each other. Yeah, this is not good. You're not doing it right if it's 45 minutes. That is crazy to think about. A Green Chef meal takes 30 minutes or less. And you're prepping the wrong ingredients. Thank you to the sponsor of today's video.

Today's video is sponsored by Green Chef, a CCO of organic certified company with meal kits delivered to make people eat well. Oh, fuck. I'm a friend of Green Chef. Green Chef is one of those things where they have sponsored the show so many times and sponsored my YouTube channel that now when I have to do a Green Chef video, I don't even need to look at what they want me to say. I know it from memory. You're like, give me the code, babe. Let's get it. I love Green Chef.

Now that you live alone, are you more into cooking? Oh, I've always loved cooking. You do? Yeah. I made this, my best friend Taylor referred to it as Cajun mash the other night because I just kind of threw a bunch of shit together and it turned into mash real quick. Now when I said are you into cooking, I meant edible food. I meant recipes. To some it's edible. Wait, have you ever seen that Real Housewives clip where she's like, whatever happened to hello? How are you?

My name is. That's me looking at your cooking, bitch. Whatever happened to salt? Whatever happened to bake the chicken? No, bitch. I'll throw it into a pot. It's Cajun mash. Oh, my God. Because it's so... I wanted... So I started out... I wanted to make... Have you ever had southern black-eyed peas? No. No.

Southern black eyed peas or garden peas or whatever they're called are you cook them with like a smoked turkey neck and like a bunch of chicken broth and like all these seasonings and whatever and fried okra and you put it all and it's good and it's sort of soupy but it's beans and it's a tradition that we do on New Year's where you eat it for like good luck in the New Year. Don't ask me. I didn't come up with it. Your family or everyone? Well, my family's Southern and it's a Southern tradition. Okay. So.

that's kind of how I learned how to make it. But then I was like, no, what if I put on my science hat? I was like, what if? And I just started adding a bunch of shit. And by the end of it, it was delicious. But I was on the toilet for about three, three and a half hours. It was awful. Do you cook? Yeah. What do you cook? To be honest, and this is not an ad. When I started doing stuff for Green Chef like three years ago. You like it?

I now can cook. I now can open anything and just, I know how to prep every vegetable and do whatever because I've followed at least a hundred recipes from there. Right. And, but now I love cooking. And when you live alone, I was never that ambitious when I lived alone, but being like living with David now, when you, everything, every recipe is for more than one person. Absolutely. So now when you have somebody else to like,

try to impress. It's nice. You are like, I'm going to make this a good because now it's not just me. I'll eat the shit out of a can. You know what I mean? I'll eat off the floor. I'll eat spam lukewarm on the counter. Yeah. But when you live with someone, I do think it's more like, oh,

Oh, well, now I have to try to pull it together. Also, living alone, you always have leftovers. And it's like, I don't want these. And then it's so wasteful. I do like, I've worked with HelloFresh, which is a competitor. Right. But yeah, I like it. You know, it's like, this is a serving size for one. I'm satiated. I'm not wasting food. It's a nice feeling. Yeah. And leftovers are turnt.

Now, I've never been somebody who thinks that far ahead because sometimes I've made like a soup and it'll be like, well, you just freeze soup and then months later you can have it again. I'm like, yeah, I think I'm going to pull a block of fucking noodle soup out of my freezer. I have standards. It

It probably is better though. Cause you know, some things get better after they've been like refrigerated. What? Frozen for 17 months? No. No. Like if you make tomato sauce, it's usually better. Like the day after, you know how people, some people say that. Yeah. Cause it has time to sit. Marinate. Just like me. Sit and marinate. Sit and marinate. Well, listen, um, your new home,

I saw pictures and videos of it. I think you're on the right track. When you're approaching decorating your little space now, do you have a plan? Are you just trying to look around the room and just envision? It's a lot of envisioning. But it's also, when you go antiquing stuff, and this is all stuff I'm learning, and it's been fun because...

I've never done this and my mom really helped and it was fun. So we went antiquing and she was like, cause the house is a 1920s. There's no storage at all because people around that time had four dresses to their name and they lived 12 years and they died. No, they did whooping cough at 24. They died in their babe, their outfit. They were born in. It's one of those like baptism dresses.

Christening dress. 100%. They die at 12. With seven kids. Girl, with the Spanish flu or whatever. I'm telling you. And so I literally...

I'm renting this house and it's gorgeous, but there's two closets maybe. And I'm a bitch that likes to hoard. I hoard bad. Clothes especially. Clothes, but also I love little trinkets. I love things. Objects. But I'm a Disney adult. It's very like this. The menagerie. The menagerie, but if this was like triple all this. And like nice stuff. Right. Right. It's nice stuff mixed with like, I did go to the Disney store and just kind of ball.

You ever bawled? Me and David's like third date, fourth date. We went to Universal and we went to Harry Potter together. We'd never been. This is before we knew we weren't supposed to enjoy Harry Potter. This is a long time ago. Don't get mad at me. Right. Before Harry Potter came out as a transphobe. Exactly. Harry Potter himself. Harry Potter himself. Daniel Radcliffe. Daniel Radcliffe. We're on to you. Yeah. We went to Universal and we got swept up in the magic, I think. I'm telling you, bitch. We bought wands. Adults buying wands. No, you did not. Yeah, we had a date together. That's actually crazy.

actually cute but looking at it now it's like but one time we also went to disney and we bought those lanyards and put pins on us is that okay yes it is right well consider the source right well this is a safe space this is a space i'm also not well so i i love that you know how many pairs of mickey ears i have how many 14 you're kidding i'm not joking but you buy a new one every time i did buy a new one every time the last time

I'm choking. I'm so excited. The last time I had my Pirates of the Caribbean shirt on and my Pirates of the Caribbean ears on and my Pirates of the Caribbean shoes on.

I have a problem. It's so fun. And I love spending money on things like that because it's like, this brings me joy in the moment. And then when I move and I say, oh, I have two closets. It's like, maybe I need to see someone. Right. I have two Disney stories. One is there's a drag race queen. It's, oh, and she went to Disney and you know how they, they put your name in your hat, they embroider it, but they won't do swear words. They, you can't go be like, my name is bitch. Like you can't do that.

So she went in and said, you know, she's brown. And I think she used that to her advantage. And she said, my name is Sodomite. And she has a Mickey Mouse hat that says Sodomite. That she watched them stitch into it. And I don't want to out her because I want her to have the freedom to scam in the future.

But yeah, Sada Mite. Sada Mite is crazy. Crazy. Crazy. It's Italian. Yeah. My other Disney store. Oh, you know they have the parades about 16 times a day at Disney? Every 30 minutes. As soon as you're trying to get to somewhere, there's a street shutdown. Forget it. What is it? Midtown US. No. Main Street USA. Like colonial women dancing. I understand when it's like Winnie the Pooh dancing. Why is it like suffragette? Why is that at Disney? Yeah.

It's like reenactment actors. It's like Civil War reenactment. I don't get it. I don't get it at all. I don't get it at all. And they're like lip syncing. I want to know where the music's coming from. They have little like JBL speakers up their pussy. I don't know where the music is coming from. They have muskets. No idea. But one time it was like the color. It was like Festival of Lights or something gay called. Yes, World of Color. Yes, World of Color. And I'm wearing a pink sequin hoodie.

Okay. Because I was just gay. Right. And there was a time in my life where I wanted to look gay and I wanted people to look at me. Of course. And now I don't want people to notice me at all. Exactly. But I'm in a pink sequined hoodie and this mom with a kid is dancing, watching the parade. And then she turns and looks at me and goes to her daughter and goes, look, look, look, look. Oh, I thought you were in the parade. And I was just in a pink hoodie. You think I was in the parade? You think you were the first gay person she ever saw? Does everyone you've ever known wear linen and denim? No.

You think I'm in the parade because I have a pink hoodie on? Look at this scary monster. He's wearing a pink hoodie. Halloween came early. They put sequins on this scarecrow. It's a boy wearing sequins. He must be in the parade. Do you fuck with Universal? Of course I do. Yeah. There are some rides that I'm scared of. Have you been on the Walking Dead walkthrough ride? The Walking Dead ride? There's a Walking Dead ride. That's like an abandoned hospital that you walk through like a haunted house. And there's zombies in there. Are you talking about Halloween Horror Nights? No, bitch. It's there all the time.

At this Universal over here? Yeah, it's called like AMC, The Walk of Dead or something. No, girl, I need to do that. It's really scary because they have actors in zombie outfits and like a lot of sound effects. It's scary. That freaks me out, but I like to do that with friends. I will never do that alone. It was scary. Are you like a theme park girl? Not really. I mean, I live in Los Angeles. So over the past eight years of living here, I've probably gone to Disney,

10 times. Period. And maybe Universal five times. Okay. Do you fuck with the Simpson area?

I think it's so cute. It is cute. I love The Simpsons and I love like the sort of walking through you feel like you're there with like the donuts and the cars and the whatever. But the ride sucks. The ride sucks and it gives me a headache. It's too much like jerking around. It's too jerky and it's too dim. I'm like squinting at the screen but it's right in front of me. I think that they need to upgrade it. Universal I know you're watching. I know.

Of course they are. What else are they fucking doing? Not updating rides. Girl, let the mummy ride go. I love the mummy ride. You're sick in the fucking head. You're sick in the head. Jurassic Park. It's terrifying. Such a fun ride. Terrifying. I will never go on that again. I'm not fond of animatronics. Oh, okay. They spook me. Well, you know they're not real. But that's what makes it scary to me. Okay. There's something really sinister about the fact that like...

When no one's on that ride and like the lights are off, that thing is just sitting in there waiting. - You think they're fucking each other? - No, that thing is just sitting there waiting. I don't like that.

I don't like that. He's just in there. It's just in there. The people who listen to this know about this, but like, I remember when I was five years old, we had a birthday at Chuck E. Cheese and I peeked under the curtain and I saw them in the dark sitting, waiting, smoking a cigarette. And there's something about animatronics sitting and waiting and smiling that I don't like. You would hate five nights at Freddy's girl. Oh, I played that. Yeah. That scared the shit out of me. I played it in VR. Oh,

Scared the shit out of me. Scared the shit out of me. You know that fan base goes so hard? The FNAF fan base? Can I tell you, that's a fun little game when you want to get a little 15-minute spook out of your grandma at Christmas. Right, right, right, right. To play it for hours.

Just do crack. Literally. Like if you want to traumatize your body and your mind. Yeah, you're ill. You're going to give yourself trauma. Jamie Lee Curtis trauma. Trauma. Yeah. What's your favorite Disneyland ride? My favorite Disneyland ride is probably, well, I like the high intensity, like let's go, bitch. We have to go. We should do a blog and go together. We should. Oh,

I hope you're not kidding. - Mary, we should take a weekend and we should be like, "Hey, we should do a video." We should be like, "We're doing every ride at Disney, go." - We should do a VIP tour with your money.

I'm self-funding, bitch. You got network money. No. You know what? You know what Katya and I do? We go to Disney and we literally like hookers. You wait for them to notice you? Well, Katya and I literally like prostitutes. We go. We stand by a ride. We hike up our skirts and we're like, ooh, you're so tall. And we wait for some fag in a red coat to be like, can I just take you in the back?

I'm dead serious the way they do it to me too I may as well be with y'all that literally me and Drew we go and we're like we should just go wait and we'll go over there and be like what do y'all want to do whatever and we wait for somebody to notice yeah you start flipping your hair and being like period yeah yeah you know what's humbling though when they're like oh my god I love you

I'm like, oh, you don't care if I live or die. No, we have lucked out. I had an employee take me on a few rides. I even had an employee take me. One time I have his number. I texted him. He got me to Club 33 and I got to have lunch there. Shut up, bitch. And I was like, is it weird that I only know you because you're a fan of me and you met me at Disney. But if you're really offering, my partner and I will go to Club 33 with you. Yeah. So we went on a double date with this fan who works at Disney, who was super nice. How funny.

fun it was really fun but um i i really am just like holding out for a hero at disney like i'm waiting for a homosexual and i'm like that's right bitch what do you got for me they see me with my lanyard with my six disney pins and your ears what we're not doing is going on cars you don't like cars mama let me tell you what cars is you like my leg here it's been shocking me the whole time it's

I have been not able to get a booking at European Wax Center for three weeks. Have you been able to get a booking at the Bic Center using a razor in your bathroom? You look like Hagrid, bitch. That's bad.

That's bad. But if you shave, you can't wax. I thought you had crocheted leggings on. No, bitch. That's actually going to be part of my leg. Are you looking at this sock tan? There's a lot going on under the knee right here. I'll just do this. This is literally, it's like I look down and I'm like, fuck me. I know. Anyway. Well, my legs aren't even that hairy. Oh, I know. I see you looking at me. You're disgusted in horror and shock. I don't like the Cars ride because to get to Anaheim, California, you sit and stop and go traffic.

Well, yeah, but it's not cars. And then the cars ride is sitting in a car, Mary, pretending to run on a fake road. That's what we did on the way to Disney. It's Radiator Springs Racers. You bitch. You don't get it. You don't get the cinematic universe. I've also never seen cars. Is that part of it? Yeah.

What is actually wrong with you? You've never experienced the magic of Owen Wilson and Larry the Cable Guy together as a duo. I've never seen Cars. I gotta watch Cars, huh? You know, you would love it because it's like small town America, like scary small town. Just say poor white trash. Poor. Say poor. Y'all are poor. Poor. I don't like that ride. I don't know what else at Disney. My favorite one, I hate to say.

I think Indiana Jones turns it. I get that. It's like being in a movie. Yeah, I get that. You know, when they just redid it. So the ball actually rolls towards you and it looks like you're going to die and then you go under it.

And then Indy's like hanging from the rope. It's so... Oh, I've seen that. That animatronic of Indiana Jones? Horny. That one's amazing. It really looks like him. It really does. People animatronics are fine with me. Okay. Animals really spook me. You have like a phobia. Yeah. All right, guys. Did we clock that? Everybody knows. They've all heard about it. Everyone's going to start sending you edits of Five Nights at Freddy's. I'll tell you this. We've talked about this on every media. My nightmare? That Matterhorn ride. I was about to say that's one of my top three. It's...

The thought of this, it starts with you going up a track and you hear it roar and you hear it. The premise of the ride is that the matter, the Yeti is chasing you. Yeah, he gonna get you, girl. You go around certain corners where he has red eyes and reaches out. Are you fucking with me? We're not doing that. Rides are fun. No, I'm not.

Every time. And you know what's even scarier? You ride it at night. And you know there's two tracks. There's two tracks. One of them is like bunny slope. And the other one is like black diamond, triple diamond. Like the turns are...

And it's like going six times faster than the normal one. That's my favorite one. That's what I'm saying. It's very jerky. I love it. So I've slipped a disc. Like I'm immobilized. And then this thing is reaching toward me and I'm just like. Yeah, defenseless. I can't do that. I can't be a part of that. And then they yell at you as you're getting off the ride. A terrifying moment. Yeah. And the music too. Like it's this like Swedish, like I don't know. Like polka.

I guess music leading to death. I'm obsessed with it, but the vibes are incredible. You know what? My favorite ride. Have you ever been to Disney World in Disney or sorry in Florida in Florida? The only reason to go to Florida. Well, the period the Twilight Zone ride the Tower of Terror. That's my favorite ride at any theme park ever. Do they drop rides? Yes.

Do you like the ones in the wild where it's like a circle and it's not enclosed and you go up and drop? It's like Six Flags. It scares the life out of me, Mary. Yeah, it's terrifying. The thing I like about Tower of Terror is that it's long. It's a long ride. It is like a narrative. Yeah. And it's scary. They redid it at Disneyland, though, because now it's Guardians of the Galaxy. Girl, don't get me started. Boring. I don't know why it's Guardians of the Galaxy. I don't either, girl. Hunkerburn in Love plays...

While you go up and down. And that raccoon's like, what's happening? Bitch, you're a Disney adult. The way that you know that, you're like, the Jackson 5's in my ear. I'm sorry. I have memory, bitch. That's more than I can say. But no, it was. I don't want to be a traitor. But when it was Twilight Zone, I think it was better. I agree. And also, you would go on the track through it a little bit. Yeah. And there was that little girl who was terrifying. Scary. We had.

We should do better than that. We should go together and we should stay on property so we can do two days. Will Katya come? Probably not. She'd be miserable. She loves theme parks. She likes thrill rides and I think Disney lets her down because it doesn't have enough... I agree. I do agree. California Adventure has better roller coasters, but... Yeah, I think Universal has better...

Universal in Florida. But Disney's more of like, I enjoy the experience more. It's more cohesive. Totally. And the California Disneyland really is like old school Hollywood, like black and white Mickey Mouse shit. Obsessed with it. Yeah. Obsessed. We all have to go.

Well, let's make it happen. Would you guys watch that? Comment below. Would you watch a vlog of us going to Disney? Girl, they'll watch us finger pop each other's assholes. It's really not like, will they watch? It's like, when's it coming out? It's not that we're funny. It's that they have nothing going on. They're bored, girl. They're bored. We are premium media.

Whatever happened to hello? How are you? My name is. Listen, not that they don't know where to find you. Tell them where they can find you. I am Brittany underscore broski. You can find me on YouTube, TikTok, Instagram. I think that's about it. Work. And if you don't know, I'm at Trixie. I'm pretty much everything now. So thank you, Brittany, for filling in for Katya. And we'll see you guys soon. Bye. Thanks for having me.

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