CboysTV on Hot Moms, Hurting Eachother, and Breaking Things 01:08:33

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I have fully done things around the home that I think look good and then a bang in the night and I wake up to a shelf collapsing, a painting falling off the wall. Like it, I've seen it all go south. I own a home and I can tell you, I know how much work it can take. Whether it's everyday maintenance and repairs or making dream projects a reality, it can be hard just to know where to start. But now all you need to do is Angie that and find a skilled local pro who will deliver the quality and expertise you need.

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but I'm so scared to try that on my own. Angie has 20 years of home experience and they've combined it with new tools to simplify the whole process. Bring them your project online or with the Angie app. Answer a few questions and Angie can handle the rest from start to finish or help you compare quotes from multiple pros and connect instantly, which means you can take care of any home project in just a few taps.

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Hey, do I have approval at any point during this pod if I need to fart mid-conversation? Can I just grab the mic and shove it up my ass?

Yo, I think David just answered that question for us. He didn't even ask for permission. I'm sweating. All right, guys. Welcome back to another podcast. We are joined today with our good friend, David McKinney, who started out as just a corporate guy, sponsor. No, he's from 509, one of our longest running brand company endorsements.

I don't know why I'd call it that. What would you call our relationship? It started as a sponsor, but now it's just like. Yeah, it's more than that. So I didn't want to just like downplay it. There's collabs. There's trips. There's videos. I don't know. Brand relations, maybe? Joined by his sidekick, Evan. Dirty Ev. Hey, pal. Dirty Ev.

Just like back in preschool. Right, right. So for those of you that don't know, they went to school together from preschool until senior year. Yeah, David's actually the reason that we know Evan today. But anyway, we just ripped an hour and a half long podcast on 509's YouTube channel and Spotify, wherever you're listening to podcasts. Feeling your passion. After you listen to this one, if you want to listen to more of us, go and check that out. Anyway, welcome. Welcome.

Thanks, pal. I feel like we just did this. I can't wait to see where this one leads. We talked about a lot of snowmobiles on the 519. For crying out loud, I'll do it myself.

So as someone who wasn't in on this joke, no idea what just went on. Like, Ben, I'm not going to lie. I thought you went over to go, like, help Evan with something and then almost, like, fell into the wall and knocked over the sign because you definitely almost knocked over the sign. I'll just be honest. I went in to take the legs out of Evan's chair. That's why we put them on a plastic chair.

And they didn't want to break. So Ryan, is your foot okay, Ryan? Yeah, it's nickel. I thought it was your shin, thank God. I'll just do it myself. I definitely did not see that coming. Yeah, I was suspicious the second I walked in here and saw a white chair. I trusted the process. I mean, dude, people listening to this podcast right now are so confused if they're not watching this on YouTube.

Where do hamsters come from in the wild?

I have no idea, but it has to be an animal out there in nature somewhere. Have you ever seen one? No. You don't think Patco just breeds them? No, they definitely breed them, but they come from somewhere. Where's the original, the OG hamster? Is that a wild bear, like animal?

I mean, even cats, I guess, are, but where do hamsters come from? Dude, I've never thought about this, but it is an extremely valid point. Where do they live naturally? Are they a rodent? Pardon my language, mom, but fuck hamsters. I like pets. I like a lot of pets, but my sister had a hamster growing up, and...

bite me every time and she goes that's just because you have like sweaty hands what salty salty fingers I'm like yeah okay so I'd wash my hands before I hold the hamster still bite me like I'm talking pull blood and

And I was like, I hate hamsters. Why would you ever want a hamster? I've never heard of a vicious hamster. Not vicious. I've never heard of a wild hamster either, though. That's true. Can somebody get to the bottom of this? I'm searching it here. I mean, why wouldn't you want a hamster? You could have a little cage in the corner of your bedroom, you know, full of soda, smells like crap. The thing does nothing but nibble on you a little bit, run on a wheel. This is what Evan's girlfriend says about him. Jeez.

Syria. Oh, okay. That's where they originate from? As was. Clearly wild, but like... They were not bred domestically until 1939. So there was just wild hamsters up until like... Only wild hamsters. Like 80 years ago. I mean, I've never been to Syria exploring in the woods, so this makes sense. Some of them are in Greece, Romania, Belgium, and northern China also. That's so weird to think about. Can you just imagine seeing hamsters running around?

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Oh, Peruvian people. The only thing I compare it to is like seeing a rabbit in the wild, you know? You think of bunnies as pets also. Yeah, true. And you see cottontails and it kind of just is this cute little fluffy thing bouncing around. Then coyotes eat them and nature gets gnarly. Evan, what kind of...

animals did you have growing up? I can see you having like a lizard or a snake or some shit like that. Did you have a cat for a while? I could too, to be honest. Just a cat. Cat was the only pet we had short of like catching a frog or a snake or something and keep it in a cage outside of the house. I mean, if that counts as a pet, but you like catch a turtle and have it for like a week and then you let it go. A painter or a snapper?

Oh yeah, painted turtles, no snappers No snappers? No, but had just like one cat that we got when I was probably 7, 6, 7, 8 And then had it through my entire childhood What about you Dave?

One dog, Golden Doodle, because my parents were brutally allergic to dogs. It was one of those classic, like, hound your parents that you're going to get a dog and take care of it, and then you do nothing. And then don't. It's just a family dog. My mom was... It was my mom's dog, but it was my dog, you know? And I didn't do a damn thing ever. You didn't even put up, like, an effort. No, I did. I'll never forget when we picked her up. We were bringing her back, and she had... Not my mom, the dog. Just because...

I figured that's what you were talking about. I did too. Had like liquid diarrhea in the backseat of the car. First ride home. First ride home. Are we talking about your mom or the dog? The dog. I hate when that happens. So like that's my first impression. All excited to get a dog. And then I'm wiping up liquid shit everywhere. So I'm instantly turned off from taking care of this animal.

But, I mean, he was a great dog, 11 years old, you know. Good. R.I.P. Lacey. Oh, not around. I was just going to ask. Still there? Mm-mm. You, in the winter, travel more than I would have ever thought you even traveled. Like, I guess looking at your position at 509, you're on the road November. As early as it snows, you're on the road, and as late as it snows, you're on the road. As far as that goes. 60 to 70 days on snow every winter. That's almost as much as us.

In the last five years. Six to seven for us. It's so rad being able to drive 45 minutes now and ride really good terrain and get snow rather than 16 hours. But you guys are the warriors that keep the industry alive. You guys are spending the money on fuel, everything, lodging, all that, driving 16, 17 hours just to ride for four days. I don't miss it, but...

Without those types of people, this industry wouldn't be what it is. Yeah, that's the Midwestern way. I think mountain riding is becoming more and more popular too. For sure. You know, more just, I guess, used to doing that trek and getting like another snowmobile that you can ride out there. It is a big commitment, but I think the sport's growing more and more. The bomber is the barrier of entry. Well, to a point.

To a point. Like last year, we did a video, cheap versus expensive. Right.

We definitely didn't get as far, but I'd say we had equally as much fun. I would never go out there. Like, this is just me personally. Like, I would never go out there with those three old sleds that we had. I would never, like, plan a trip to go out there with those. So, like, that is a part. You make a good point, like, still. Like, there's a lot of people that I'm stoked to hear that are making the trip, and they make it seem like nothing because they love it so much. Like, guys from Wisconsin, that's far enough, like,

Michigan especially, but yeah, you know, 23 hours to West Yellowstone. We're like, geez, and it takes us 12. The reality is to do it right, it's a hundred grand minimum to get into it. The diesel truck, trailer or sled deck plus a sled. If you want to do it, you know, with newer stuff that you don't have to worry about maintenance as much, it's a hundred grand to get into the sport.

Yes, but there is ways around it. For sure. But, you know, the diehards, it's a hundred grand to get into it. Yeah, but you could have a friend that's going and, hey, can I come with? Yeah. Yeah, and maybe you have a dirt bike. So, like, for the first couple of years, me and Mike would just put a snow bike kit on our dirt bikes because we couldn't afford mountain sleds. So it was like the way to, you know, kind of like dip our –

feed into the into the mountain riding experience without having to spend 15 grand and you know we'd be in like three grand instead we didn't do that first but that's like when we really started experiencing it maybe this has been said but do snowmobilers look at snow bikes like dirt bikers look at quad guys oh 100 really yeah really i don't know it's mixed it's

Super awesome sport for guys that come from a moto background. Like they pick it up instantly. It's a way from getting to the back country without having the massive learning curve of a sled. And then honestly, for like the guys that are phasing out of sleds, the older crew, they can still get out longer in their lifetime and efficiently get across the back country.

It's just not my cup of tea. David's like, but that's absolutely it. That is the end of anything good I have to say. Did I mention they were lame? It sounds so old school, but there's no replacement for displacement. It's the same concept. To even dumb that down more, there's no replacement for a snowmobile. Yeah, the power's hard to beat. And it's nothing the same at all.

No. But we have a good time. Snow bikes are fun. Dude, I just love 220 horsepower. That's all it comes down to. 220? That's what you're running? Those turbos, yeah, about that. Dude, we had these two brothers out from Brainerd. They came out, ride trick jet skis.

215 horse for a jet ski. Is that what those things are pumping out? Yeah. What kind of motor is that? They had a Polaris bottom end. That was my favorite part. It's all Frankenstein, not Frankenstein, all built. Yeah. But they take Polaris bottom ends from just a Polaris jet ski. Keep in mind, Polaris hasn't made jet skis in a long time. What CC motor are those things running? I think 900. Naturally aspirated? Yeah. That's...

That's insane, dude. So much power for a two-stroke. So it was just cool to hear that because the only other time you hear about that power in a two-stroke is sleds. Yeah. Yeah, you guys are going to see that video this Thursday. Merch drop this Thursday, 7 o'clock. Check out the website, seaboystv.com. The video of bringing those guys out is insane. I wasn't here for it, so I've just seen a couple clips of it, and it's truly insane.

absolutely nuts what they can do and how young they are 14 and 16 years old and they're like the like two of the best yeah their riding was unbelievable and then when they take their helmets off and you realize they're just like a couple of young kids it was like 10 times as remarkable

They don't even have time to have gotten that good. They just are that good. How do they get that good only riding stand-up four or five months a year? Do they travel south or anything in the winter months? Yeah, they have a competition in Havasu. They're not there constantly training. No, but they did say they'll run a tank a day, out there a half hour a day ripping flips, I guess.

That's why. Practicing. Dude, it's so cool. The opportunities that we have to meet these insanely talented athletes and these incredibly talented individuals just in general, like they just don't get like the recognition that they deserve. Maybe it's because their part or their sport is more of like a niche sport, but it's so cool that we can, you know, bring them on

showcase them on our videos and in our platform and people just love it. And I hope that they get something out of it, you know, get all kinds of recognition from it. But I don't know. It's just really cool. The people that we get to meet, and especially through David and the 509 connections, when we were younger, the people that we looked up to and we were like, I told this story about, I was literally, I saw a sane skinner,

at Hay Days one time, and I was literally too afraid to go up and say hi to him. And now he's like one of our best friends, which is crazy. But the way that we look up to all these incredibly talented athletes, and now we just get to film with them and bring them on and have a good time and kind of show like the personalities behind the talent and

I don't know. We've just like has way too much fun with you and all the connections that we've gotten out of that. Like what I always call is like pinch me moments. Like just keep yourself level on it. Cause Evan and I, we talked about in that pod also growing up, watching all those old films. And then now he's been able to meet some of those guys. Like you guys just wrote a Brett Turcotte in March, which is, I mean, he's eight times X, sorry, eight times X games medalist.

It's insane. Like he's on another level. And when we were with him, he was riding like it. Yeah. He made it feel like we were just chilling with him for the day. Yeah, why don't you come sledding? It's a nice spring day. Pinch me all day, dude. Yeah, but that's the takeaway is like they're just dudes. They're just exceptionally better than all of us at a certain thing. It's really all it boils down to.

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Hire high quality certified pros at Angie.com. Today's episode is brought to you by Angie. Angie has made it easier than ever to connect with skilled professionals to get all your jobs and projects done well. Let me tell you, there's the version of it where you try to do something at home and then there's a version of it where you have someone help you, you watch them do it the right way and you go, thank God I didn't try to do that myself.

I have fully done things around the home that I think look good and then a bang in the night and I wake up to a shelf collapsing, a painting falling off the wall. Like it, I've seen it all go south. I own a home and I can tell you, I know how much work it can take. Whether it's everyday maintenance and repairs or making dream projects a reality, it can be hard just to know where to start. But now all you need to do is Angie that and find a skilled local pro who will deliver the quality and expertise you need.

Whatever your home project, big or small, indoor or outdoor, you can Angie that and connect with skilled professionals to get the project done well. Right now, one of my wish lists is I want a bike for my condo in Milwaukee and I would love to rig it up on a pulley in the ceiling because I have one of those like lofted ceilings.

but I'm so scared to try that on my own. Angie has 20 years of home experience and they've combined it with new tools to simplify the whole process. Bring them your project online or with the Angie app. Answer a few questions and Angie can handle the rest from start to finish or help you compare quotes from multiple pros and connect instantly, which means you can take care of any home project in just a few taps.

Because when it comes to getting the most out of your home, you can do this when you Angie that. Download the free Angie mobile app today or visit Angie.com. That's A-N-G-I dot com. Fifteen years ago, I was waiting in line to get them to autograph my t-shirt. And now I'm drinking beers with them at Hay Days. That's crazy. Autographing their t-shirt? Well, maybe not yet, but...

Their wives are asking for Dude Evan Bro's signature. Keep the moms out of this. Why was I just going to say that and then Ben? I stopped myself from saying it and then Ben said it. Evan loves moms. I do. I love Patty. I don't know who Patty is, but oh, Evan's mom. I'm sorry. Great lady. Just a peach. Yeah? Yeah. So you two have been friends for a long time, right? You grew up together? Oh, yeah. It's like an interrogation. I just want to know. Mm-hmm.

What was it like growing up with Evan? Scary. Scary? Kind of. The biggest fun fact about Evan is that he grew up on a golf course and worked at a country club. We worked at the same golf course even. Yeah, David worked there too. We worked together also. Well, David I could see. Evan quit way quicker than I did. Actually, Evan didn't quit. I think he got fired. No, no, no. I never got fired. I probably just didn't get put on the schedule. Okay.

There's a difference. Evan was the kid who was taking the governor off the golf carts, the maintenance carts, and was flying around, drifting on the golf course, and always getting caught doing it, though.

Or he'd be jumping the tee boxes that I just mowed. So the thing is, like you said, got caught admitting that you were doing the same stuff. Were you just bad at hiding it or was he just dumb about it or what? I probably just did it more often maybe. He didn't check the surroundings beforehand and just full send constantly. What's the story of you guys going on a ski trip? Yeah.

You started telling it earlier, and I was like, wait, wait, wait, wait, wait. Stop, stop, stop. We'll wait for the pod. Evan remembers it better than I do. We were like 13, maybe. My first time ever on an airplane. I remember that. Which he's terrified of. Absolutely. Oh, so this was like a ski trip, ski trip. Yeah, Steamboat Springs, Colorado. Okay, all right. Did this all resort from the Mexican restaurant? Oh, yeah. Yeah. I remember that. Evan, just take the wheel on this. Yeah.

Evan gets so scared in front of a microphone. I don't know what parts you want me to talk about, David. What did you just get to the conclusion? Which... Conclusion. Where you cleared my whole family out of the apartment because of the smell of your ass. Yeah, your mom got upset with me because I had flatulence. It's like you brought me to a Mexican restaurant two hours ago. Like paint peeling smells. What did you expect to happen? It was...

Like, the most vile thing I've ever smelt come out of a human. My mom stands up, like, in the living room, and she's like, we gotta leave. And we just left. So it looked like she was ready to cry. Like, I don't know what we're gonna do with this kid. He stinks, and I can't handle it. Like, open the windows, leave, go for a walk, let that place air out. He cleared the whole condo out. Was he... Hold up. Was he proud of his work? Hold up.

Oh my God. I'll never forget that smell. I'm glad that you'll never forget about my farts, David. What day of the trip was it? It happened a few times, actually. I would say the Mexican night. That was midway through the trip. Okay, so you at least had a couple days under your belt of being a good kid. No. I showed up a bad kid. They knew me before the trip. Oh, yeah.

I would say they knew what they were getting into. They kind of knew what they signed up for. Hey, when you say that it cleared out your entire family, like, were your grandparents in there? No, it was my mom and dad. Okay. Even your dad left? Oh, yeah. I was really hoping that it was like a full-on family vacation. Do you remember throwing the fake fruits from the fruit bowl at people in the hot tub off the balcony? I think you tried to take a bite of one. I did. I cut my gum. Before he knew it was fake fruit and grabs it.

bleeding everywhere like a foam it looks so realistic it's like a decorative one Evan's like ooh apples that can cut you I might have realized halfway through it was fake but I just committed to taking a chunk out of it and it was sharp comedian

Never backs down from a good bitch. He shows me the apple. It's just, like, covered in blood on the inside because there's white styrofoam. You take it out of him and you're like, Evan, we're renting this. He put it back and just, like, flipped it over. I feel like Evan's the kid that when he comes over, your family, like, makes sure the first aid kit is ready. No, we just send him home if he got too hurt. Dude, it's, like, a total knock-on wood thing, but...

I never really got hurt when I was younger. I would pile myself up. I would break everything. But as far as truly being injured...

Pretty rare. You're really good at falling. Like a cat. Yeah, I think. He was just more daring, right? Like I was always into it, but I kind of was reserved. Yeah, pussy. Yeah. Like I might get hurt. I know the type. You and I get it. I'm the type. And Evan would just go for it constantly. But he was doing that with everything from scooters to skateboards to BMX bikes. Scooters. Yeah. We were pretty good at scooters, actually.

Before scooters were cool. Yeah. Have you noticed that? You go to a skate park now, there's more scooter kids than skateboarders. We had to build our own scooters out of like razor, like the folding ones and like rig it so they didn't fold. And some of them still had suspension on the front. Like not even close to what kids think scooters are now. What we were doing stuff on. Yeah, back in our day. Yeah.

I feel like the guys like 70 years ago when they put a two by four with roller skate wheels for a skateboard. That was us with scooters 10 years ago. Inventing the sport. God damn it. I can't stop thinking about Evan clearing your family up. Thanks, David's parents for the trip. They ate. They can't stop thinking about it. I can't help but remember. I think that was the only trip you went on.

Dude, do you remember the very first day we get to the top of the mountain, to the very top, the Christmas tree bowl? We have to, like, hike above the chairlift. And there's a nice fresh line with a few little drops. And we decided you should film it.

So you went down halfway, and I catch on the very first rock, my ski, and just tomahawk down this chute. Day one, run one. Like, immediately. Well, at first you thought I was dead, so I know you... And you were all worked up, and I realized I was alive, and then...

And then we realized, like, because my skis didn't have the brakes on them because I had broken them. Gone. So one ski is just gone. Like, we can't find it. It's just literally not there. And we've accepted the fact my ski's gone. So I got two poles, one ski, and I'm just kind of sliding down this chute. And I'm like, can I at least see the video? Yeah.

David gives me that deer in headlights look. He's like, oh, I was so scared you got hurt. I didn't save it. Like back when phones, you actually had to hit save on the video. So we didn't even have the video of it. It's messed up that you turned into a film. The irony, right? Yeah. I still have that problem actually. Like when a bad crash is happening of...

I mean, I just get worried if everybody's okay, which is not a bad thing to worry about. But I have this tendency of, while worrying, moving the camera away to get a better look to make sure...

And I've screwed that up a lot. I'm like gnarly crashes. The start of it and then it cuts because I like start filming the ground. Yeah. To put it this way, everybody's okay. If I ever happen to be in a gnarly wreck with all the gnarly snowmobiling I do, I would prefer there to be a video of me in a gnarly wreck. I'm trying to work past it as much as it's a weird thing to work past, but... You'll do it for me. I get to quit caring about people so much, I think. Definitely. I tell you what, though. You make that mistake once around here. Ooh. Yeah.

Yeah. Never get told the camera and block, huh? That's the money shot for us. Yeah. Yeah. I distinctly remember one time. I think, uh, I got bored and I scrolled to your Facebook. First of all, your Facebook's a wild place. I'm going to delete it. But there's a picture of you rolling around. I believe in a Ranger single cab Ranger and you have your snowmobile, not how a normal person would put a snowmobile in where the tail end is hanging out the back.

But you had the front up on the cab of the Ranger, I believe. How did we get that in there? I think there was probably four of us. We had to lift it up. But it was a regular cab, like short box Ranger. Plus, it had a toolbox in it. So, like, they're literally, even with the tailgate down, the sled wouldn't sit in there. So, we just kept pulling it forwards until it balanced. Rolled the windows. Until it was on top of the cab. Yeah, rolled the windows down. Ran, like, a strap, like, through the ski loops. Maybe the spindles.

She was fine. I just remember there was carbide marks on his roof. The first time he did it, he put towels down. No, I did it backwards. Remember, we had to haul two sleds that day. And we put the rev in forward. Yeah. We flipped them. One had the track with studs on the roof, and that put stud holes in my roof. That's not a good idea. But somebody out there has a whatever year Ford Ranger with carbide marks on the roof. And a Nitro Circus sticker on the side.

Evan was just a grimy kid. I wish I could meet younger Ev. I wish you guys could too. I should dig up some photos that you can, a little slideshow. No, we shouldn't. Do you remember when fail was a thing? Were you guys old enough when people were just adding the text of fail? He wasn't, but I was, yeah. So like pre-memes, right?

You would just get... There was like a fail app, and you'd download it, and you'd type the word fail and put it on a photo that was a fail. There was nothing more to it. That was like the same time as planking, though, wasn't it? Yeah. No. Or maybe...

I have this photo. Are we aging ourselves? By memes? Yeah, by memes. I have this photo of Evan wearing this Walmart, like, full-face mongoose helmet. Remember this thing? Yours. Yeah. Your full-face mongoose helmet. You acted like I just got this from Walmart. It was yours in your garage. Okay. Continue. And

And it's like three sizes too small. And he put it on and pulled the chin bar down. And so his whole face is like sticking on the helmet like this. Just for this photo. And he could not get it off. Do you remember that?

Full panic attack. It's like my cheekbones got above something rigid in the helmet. You do have to find cheeks. It was like actually stuck, like sliding a ring on where it's a little tough, but it goes on and it's not coming off. Did you call the fire department? Dude, I thought we're going to have to cut my head off. Okay, it's so good with the distinct bold fail. Okay, so now I'll ask you the reverse. Evan, what was David like in high school?

little shit no ah man he was uh he wore tall tees and skinny jeans flat brim hats with the sticker on them if that's a lot more of an outfit analysis than i expected i don't know how else to describe david was literally how he's wearing well because he's like so punk rock now but he went through a little phase he had a free lil wayne shirt

Yes or no? Dude, you got to get over the wardrobe problem. Evan, look at me. Look at me. Do you remember anything about David other than what he was wearing? Honestly, David's the exact same as he was now. Dude, dude hasn't changed since preschool. Thank you.

I don't know. I feel like us hanging out now is literally the same as in, like, eighth grade. Like, you want to go ride some scooters? Yeah, kind of, yeah. But it's, like, the same vibes. Like, I literally... I don't even know how I would describe you. I just...

ridden snowmobiles my whole life. This is all I've done, man. I'm kind of like pretty simple. You always had nice snowmobiles. Just riding snowmobiles. I had a 99 MXZ. Did you resent him for that, Ev? I mean, yeah, when I was a kid and my stuff was broken and his was mint, like, obviously. I wouldn't let him ride it ever again. No, and he wouldn't. Ever. Well, maybe not.

because of their record. Yeah, there's a reason. I don't blame them. You've always been such a destructive human, right? Yeah. Since day one. Is that just lack of care? Would you consider yourself unlucky? Where's this coming from? You know when you guys talk about where the chart comes to injury versus reward or something like that? I kind of look at fun versus breaking, maybe. Okay.

So it's like if this seems real fun, like I'm just going to do it. If breaking something's like a side effect, then run it. Yeah, but he had that same mentality when he was using somebody else's equipment. I just wanted to see what it would do. That's the problem. He still does. If Ben gave you the keys to Lambo, you wouldn't floor it? Probably not. Would you? Of course. See, that's where we differ.

And he would. He's lying right now. You wouldn't put that sucker to the boards. Honestly, Ev, I could care less because it's just so entertaining for us. And if shit breaks in the process, shit breaks in the process. It's part of the game. Breaking your guys' stuff is way better than breaking my own. I'd imagine you're really good at it. I do feel bad sometimes.

You looked like you felt genuinely bad and you sunk his Mike Snowbike. It was so funny because he was so confident in that one. He was so confident. Like, failure wasn't even an option. Like, it wasn't even a possibility. And I was like, it's 100% going to sink. And he was like, I guarantee it won't. I was like, okay. I just didn't see how it wouldn't work. I saw videos of guys...

water skipping snow bikes it's like i've water skipped snowmobiles as long as you don't do something really dumb you can't sink the snowmobile which i have sunk but i can i'm just saying i thought that i had a real good chance at it and then to find out there was no chance well it originally started that we wanted to do it on an actual dirt bike

And that was the plan. And I think, I don't know who vetoed it. Maybe it was me. I might have just been like, dude. That's not going to happen. He's going to make it 10 feet. And then he's going to OTB hard. Come on.

Completely ejecto-cito. Yeah. And in hindsight, I guess the same fatality or poor choice of words, the same would have been the same end result either way. So maybe you just should have done it. Hey, everyone. Quick break in today's podcast for a word from our sponsor, Vessi.

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australia and new zealand thanks again vesey now back to the podcast i would have swore the success rate would have been higher for the snow bike though like i figured the dirt bike's like 10 success snow bikes 90 i don't know maybe we're gonna drop a gear what gear did you hit it in third i think i hit it in fourth yeah that's a problem yeah but then he went like went fourth to third to second to first to the bottom of the lake to the bottom of the lake with the turtles

With the fresh nipple piercing. Was that right after it? Dude, it was the next day. Imagine if you got an infection because of that. That was like Evan's third week here. No, that was his first week, I think. Was it? No, you're cramming that. Three weeks sounds about right. Okay, first month. Oh, first month for sure. David, I want you to tell me about the time you T-boned me in the middle of a 40-acre field. What? Honestly.

An honest mistake. Easy. Easy to do, actually. You know when you're a kid, or now, I still do it, and you go over like a driveway and you see the snow bank and you get a little bit of air and right when you're in the air, you pin it so you can shoot as much roost as you possibly can. Yeah. Okay? But then you look back because you want to see the roost. Of course. Right.

Right, right. So Evan and I are out in a huge field. Nothing in our way, except for each other. Not a single tree, nothing, no obstruction of view, like little tiny hill.

And I go up it. I'm on my Crossfire 500, 136. Big, big long track in my eyes. Camouflage skis. Yeah, super cool. And I pop this three-foot tall wheelie. I look back. I see my roost. I look forward. I see Evan. And I T-bone him so hard. T-bone? Yeah. He's going this way, and I'm going this way.

Which, you know, now that I've analyzed this, you saw me coming too. No, no, no, no. So I was just turning to the left, and I did put my arm up. But when I put my arm up that I was turning, you were looking backwards. So I would say a true T-bone would be like a 90-degree angle.

I was maybe a 45 degree angle and he deflected off of me so hard. And I had on 40 and you know, those plastic bar hooks you'd put in, not like where the factory bars have a bar hook. It's just a little plastic nub that you shove in it.

And that's what, what it broke your fingers. There was injuries. Oh yeah. I went, Oh, I went off the sled and I think I went like over Evan's sled and then I ripped my throttle off and I ripped my fingernail off. That's what happened. And we like wrapped my fingernail up and I think like my bandana or

or something. Of course you're wearing a fucking bandana while snuff appealing. It was cool, man. Hey, what was Dave wearing? Slednecks. Oh, yeah, definitely. He had the slednecks gear. I had Carhartt. Just...

And a bandana? And he was wearing just the tightest. The tall tee. The way that base layer fit his butt was so tight. Okay, honestly, though, going back, I can't rip on David for wearing tall tees because I wore them too. Yeah. So just throwing that out there. Did you wear each other's later? No, mine were honestly bigger. For sure.

So I slam into him. Okay. I wrap my finger, can't even feel my finger. It's like twice the size. My fingernail's gone. It's bleeding everywhere. I ride home. Like we duct tape the sled together, I think, or something. We got the throttle attached somehow. And we get back and we're like scared our parents are going to be mad. Naturally. That is like the first child's reaction. You're like, fuck. I think we made some elaborate lie up, actually. I don't think I ever told them.

Yeah, because I think my sled was good enough off that I could just act like nothing happened and you acted, was it just like a stick? Clipped a branch, right? Yeah. But now, however many years, 10, 15 years later, looking back at it, that's another one of those cheating death moments. That could have been super bad.

Well, and I think a big thing for me when I started to turn around in the field, I like picked my inside leg up and put it on the seat kind of doing, you know, to lean to turn. But that's where you deflected off of me. Like I probably would have took your bumper to my leg and it would have probably been way worse. Evan was handicapped now because of me. I've been pretty fucked up with you. It was that close. I'm glad you don't think I'm handicapped. Physically.

Dude, Dave. Yeah. Thank you for bringing Evan into our lives, bro. Mm-hmm. Truly is. No problem. He's such a good kid, and his ego is just getting out of hand. But other than that, he's such a good kid. I don't even have anything to say. I can't defend myself. There's nothing I can do.

So, here on the Life Wide Open podcast, we like to ask the hard-hitting questions. No kidding. The traumatizing ones. No, and so we dive deep into a lot of important subjects and stuff like that. And so, being not many opportunities when I have two young guys from Cloquet, Minnesota to be able to sit down and ask them questions. So, David, was it hard growing up with Evan that his mom was so hot?

No. It was hard that she was a twin. Have you guys met the twin? She was a twin? Mm-hmm. Do you guys not know that? Jesus. Why was that? She's terrible. Hold up. Evan, dude, you can't dox your aunt, bro. I don't care how hot she is. So you guys do know about the twin. Okay, so I would like to talk about Evan's hot mom.

And David's thoughts on it. You know, that's a tough one for me because I don't really, I grew up with her. So I don't have the hot mom effect like you guys might.

I know that's not the answer you're hoping for, but that's the reality. I've known her since I was like five, so she was kind of like a mom to me as well. Did you get to breastfeed? Do you remember the time that Peter almost pulled the Jeep over on the fucking, excuse me, off ramp into the cocaine? No, we can say fuck on this episode. Because of the comment I made, I'm not going to repeat it, but if you remember it, you can. We're on the way home from heydays.

We were actually in your mom's vehicle. That's why I said it. What are you talking about? I had bought lots of things at Hay Days when I was like 14. What do you mean? Like what? The snowmobile stuff. On the way home from Hay Days and we were driving. I don't even know where it came from because I think I thought it was funny at the time. But I was like 14. David's in the front seat and his dad's driving. I'm in the back and...

We're just talking about how much stuff we have in the car, in the back of David's mom's vehicle's trunk. I'm like, yeah, I put my junk in your mom's trunk. And his dad was... I thought I'd get a chuckle. I think I almost got strangled. Wait, wait, wait. So your dad pulled over? No, he didn't pull over, but I'm saying it got so tense in that vehicle.

Luckily, we were pulling into town. It was one of those moments where you say the comment and then you're like... I tried to suck the words out of the air. It was already too late. How old were you? Like 14. Was this pre or post ski trip when you... Post.

Yeah, post. That was strike number two. Strike number two. That was the end. David, don't hang out with that Evan kid. Yeah, what was strike three? There had to be a strike three. Now what's the next strike? I don't even know. You would know better than me. She probably vented to you. It was just constant. I don't know. We were always just constantly. Did you get a strike back for you almost killing him with Deer's mobile? No.

We always were almost killing each other. Dude, what a strange series of events that both of your guys' lives have gone in two completely different directions. But yet somehow you had to back up with this podcast table together. Now you're sitting on a podcast with two kids that make videos for the internet.

And if we brought you two back together. To drill us about our childhood. To drill you about Evan's hot mom.

Have you met her? Yeah. Yeah, she's amazing. More along, I just mostly say it because it makes Evan uncomfortable. Oh, no, that's fair. I'm just wondering if you've actually been able to. Yeah, no, and she is incredible. I'm blessed of her presence. She's actually a great lady. Can I make David uncomfortable real quick? Please. Remember before I got the gas, we were at the Mexican restaurant, and your mom had two margaritas and spilled refried beans on her shirt? And then she's like, whoa, it's just kind of like a shelf.

Did she refer to her own? My mom, I'm so sorry. There were four of us there and three of us cringed so hard we almost had to leave. It was like the reverse Uno after Evan's comment at Hay Days about the junk. I'm sorry. If my mom gets brought into it, yours does too. Yeah, I never said anything bad about your mom. That wasn't bad. I have no idea.

Where this podcast has gone. We got to find the rails and get on it. We're very off. Damn it. I thought that was, I thought this was all really good. I think we're starting to reach state of delusion. Yeah. Give us some good questions. You got to have, I've been asking you questions all night. That don't involve our, our moms. Yeah.

Literally anything else other than our moms. It's funny. It seems like every time Ryan is going, that's where it ends. I mean, I get it. I love the moms too. So I can't blame you guys, but fuck. Dude, okay, so Dave, I need your expertise on this because I watched this and was so confused. Okay, Dave.

You love punk rock. Love it. If you show him a picture of MGK right now, I'm gonna roll out of my chair. Okay, Evan also loves punk rock. He loves MGK. MGK is his queen of punk rock. So, I know when you go to a punk rock concert, mosh pits. That's like why everyone goes. To a punk rock. Cultural experience. Exactly, okay? So...

What is this? Is this what happens? Oh my, not just a fight. Is this what happens? No. But just watch. This is punk rock, right? This is like hardcore. What am I witnessing? It's like a sub-genre of punk rock. It's like hardcore, which that one's definitely a little on the violent side. There's a man on stage just kicking people. Yeah, that's not very punk rock.

To me, that's very punk rock. You guys need to go to a show sometime. No, we need to go to a show sometime. So the actual, like the rules of the mosh pit is everybody's extremely friendly in the most violent way, if that makes sense. So it's like you're pushing each other pretty hard. Okay, so let me put myself in the setting. MGK's on stage fucking singing his heart out. No.

If you push anybody to MGK concert, they're crying. Okay. For sure crying. All right. So you're in the pit, okay? You're bumping elbows. You're shoving people that normally you couldn't get away with shoving, like people three times the size of you, and they disappear into the abyss of people. But the second anybody like— David, I'm sorry, but I cannot see you shoving these— Oh, dude. I just went to a show like two nights ago.

in the zone, fired up, come out like bruised elbows and all this. So are you in there wearing hockey pads? The second somebody falls, this is the cool, the second anybody falls, like everybody surrounds and helps pick you up. It's like, nope, that was too much. Let's pick them back up. Somebody loses a shoe, like instantly somebody's like holding it in the air, trying to find whose it is. Like everybody's very, very friendly. They're not throwing fists. You're just kind of elbows out and pushing from behind and,

it's a real friendly place. You get to release a lot of good energy and like shove some...

People around. Have you ever been in a mosh pit? No, absolutely not. It's a good time, man. You got to try it. It's funny because besides David, Ryan is the only person to be in a mosh pit. We've been to some EDM concerts where Ryan lets loose. Those aren't like mosh pits. Those aren't. No, those are peace, love, happiness. That's a bunch of sweaty people on Molly. Yeah. Circle pits are where it's at. Speaking of sweaty people on Molly. Now we do it back there.

He's ready for bad. David, most influential soundtrack, Tony Hawk or Dave Mira? Tony Hawk.

Pro Skater 3, probably. Nah. Pro Skater 2 was the best one. One through four. Fair. You guys get to experience that part in your life? No, but I had MXD versus ATV Unleashed. That game was the shit. Also a good soundtrack. Yep. I used to pick out a favorite song in my video games, and then I would turn off all the other songs and just listen to the same song on repeat as I played the game. So what? Do you remember what song it was?

Life is a highway. Life is a highway. This is the third pocket. That's the song that you're listening to? It's EA Sports. It's in the game. It's in the game. Are you trying to do the intro right now? It's in the game. I had to play. Yes. Yes. It's Magic Carpet Ride. Dale Earnhardt Jr. is on the cover.

And that game, it's like NASCAR 2003. NASCAR Thunder. Yes. And all I had was Magic Carpet Ride by Steppenwolf. That was the only song that played.

Yeah, it was sick. My dad and I used to do this. We used to do like the full 50-person races, and the first thing we'd do is turn cautions off. Turn around and just carnage. Yep. It was so sick. We all did live the same childhood. Woo, I'm sweaty. I don't think anybody ever played the game if you didn't do this, but in MXV versus ATV Unleashed, you just drive to the border. And shoot back. Yeah, that was sweet. We all did that. Yeah, of course.

I had such a good time having you guys here. How long did we do this? I think we're just getting started. Are you wrapping this up? Oh, cripes. I'm just getting warmed up. Have you got any questions for me and Ryan? Yeah. What are your moms like? Let's keep our moms out of this. Ben's mom is beautiful. She's a chiropractor. You say my mom's hot. I said your mom's beautiful, and you're going to be offended with what I said. All right. Let's stay professional here. Can't win with these guys. Hypocrites.

David. Yeah. First time you ever pissed yourself from drinking too much. I don't think I ever have. Liar. Okay, I never pissed myself, but I did piss on my Xbox once. Oh, I remember that. Wait, what? I just, I woke up in the morning once after a night with Cousin Joe. Getting into some, what were they? Natty Light seltzers.

I went to turn my Xbox on, you know, like a normal Saturday. You want to play a little Fortnite. And it didn't turn on. So then I picked it up to check if the cords were plugged in and liquid spilled out of it. And then I observed the glass TV stand or entertainment, whatever it's called, full of liquid. I smelt it. Definitely pee. Laughter

But I did tear the Xbox apart, threw the hair dryer on it for 45 minutes, runs like a champ, still have it till today. No way. Do you remember the act of peeing on it? Absolutely not. I don't even remember leaving Cousin Joe's house. Shit.

Dude, I wish I had something to add to that, Ev. But I just don't, bro. I have nothing to compare that to. I thought you guys would come in with, maybe you'd peed on something. Dude, the audience, the audience got, they got a new side of Evan that doesn't really come out that often. Talking? Yeah, mostly just Matt. Mostly the vocal side of him. You gotta get me teed up before I know how to talk. You should know that by now. We have been getting you teed up all day. I'm talking. Totally.

Mike, you got anything to add? Mike, back to the mosh pit. You want to tell the story of when you got chloroformed? Oh, I'd love to, yeah. Well, I guess to preface it a little bit, Ryan and I really wanted to go to this EDM festival. We convinced Ryan's parents. I had to do some convincing of my own, but I remember being there in the room when they were like, you're not going. And I'm over there trying to put my own in. It's going to be okay. It's chill. Was not chill. Was not chill. Was not chill.

But we got to go, had to go. Like, Ryan was 18, I was 19. And we went to the festival and had a time. We camped. It was greasy. We camped. It was fun. We camped. A lot of external activities going on around us. But we weren't involved in that at the time. And we just... Yeah, we really did. We just got our case of beer. Or ever. By the way. Yeah. At the time. Yeah, also or ever. Okay. But we...

jumped in first night. I don't know when it actually happened, but anyway. Just skip to the part where you get drunk. Oh my God, Mike. That was like the fucking third night. Mike. Third night, I guess. I was just about to ask what night it was, but third night. Wait, maybe we should have somebody tell the story that didn't get drunk and might remember what happened. Yeah, if you want to.

Ken was there the second time I got drunk. No, anyway, let me actually get to the point then. I will. Ken is watching an absolute dumpster fire from back there.

third night. Um, it's basic. A guy in front of you is like done smoking a joint. He goes, you guys want this? He seems chill. Definitely not chill. I need to preface this before we get into it. Definitely not chill. Seem chill. He,

He seemed chill. Hey, hey, hey. Common mistake. Common mistake. I make that all the time. And so this would be where Ben is like, no, I bet the dude had a full painted face and was like devilish looking. No, he wasn't. He was chill. But, I mean, anyway, passes it to me. I'm like, cool. He goes, you want to finish this after he just got done smoking it?

And I go, sure. And smoke it, and that was it. I was like lost control of all my body, lost control of standing, my arms, basically vision. Like I didn't know what was going on. I'm like, I didn't know what was going on. And I basically... Oh, dipped. Yeah, and so that's what I wondered too. Like something weird was happening because right before that also, like...

open this story up however you want, but right before that, some dude was walking around being like, he had Vicks. Oh, yeah. Vicks. And he was like, smell this, smell this, which seemed weird to him. It's not like I went like, oh, let me get, it was just like he walked around. That was weird. And so then right after that, right after that, I mean a little. Shit.

A little. Not enough to make me die. And then the dude passed this joint back. And then I basically fell. And Ryan caught me. Guardian angel. Now I'll take over because we're Michael Black's out. So we are like eighth row. There's like 50,000 people behind us. It was intense. Headliner show of the night. Micah just completely loses motor function. And I'm like...

Pretty young at this point, kind of dipping my ankles into drinking. You know, I've done it a bit. I'm just dipping my ankles into formaldehyde. I'm just getting into it. But I didn't quite understand the whole, like, not being able to control yourself under whatever. Yeah, I just didn't get it. So Micah just starts going, he's falling all over everybody. Everybody's like, dude, get off me. I'm like, what the fuck is Micah doing? And I'm like, okay.

And basically Micah just starts to drop to the floor. So I grab him and I'm like, oh fuck. And there's this going on. It was the most intense thing. And so I grabbed Micah.

And start trying to like drag him out. And nobody wants to give up their spot as you're trying to move through the crowd. And then I kind of like shifted Micah to where I was like kind of like grabbing him under. And he's just like limp in my arms. And I'm basically dragging a dead body out of the concert bowl to what people had seen. And then people started moving. The seas parted. I drag Micah up on the hill. And I'm like, are you okay? And he's kind of coming back to me.

And then, uh, it was short lived maybe 10 minutes, but that's what got me was when no one DMT trip, uh,

The worst part is this, this sounds bad and it is bad. The worst part is, is I don't know. We still don't know what we, I don't really know. By the time I got us out of the, like the, the mass of people, you kind of start coming back. What the fuck just happened? And I was like, I don't know, dude. So you blacked out. You don't remember it at all. No, I do remember it. Um, it's why I remember like,

faint scenes of getting guided out of the crowd. And when Ryan explained that, he said, no one wants to get out of the way. Even when you want to get out. Hey, I'm going to piss. I'm going to get water. No one cares. They don't even want to move out of the way for you. If they know you're belying it out, they might get out of the way. But when Ryan explained that, that I was like ghost white and he was guiding me out of the crowd, people were like dragging. And I remember that vividly. People were like, Oh fuck this guy.

Yeah. Like start yelling back, like, yeah, yeah. And they got out of the way. So that was kind of weird. And then like, we got out and you were like, what's going on, dude? And I'm like,

I don't know. I was like, what do you mean? I don't know, dude. And then you were like, you didn't see him do this. No, I did. But here's the thing. See him do this. Do what? Like, obviously, again, it was probably from homie passing the joint back. But like, what was it from? Because just before that, this guy was passing around Vicks. Like I said,

There was a lot going on. But there was a lot going on. Mike was putting that sniffer in places he shouldn't have been. I'm sure of a little bit of Googling with the time frame that it lasted.

You can maybe figure out, like narrow it down to a few things. Well, we tried and then... Yo, dude, that's so criminal and so disgusting of a human to do. As far as that goes. You don't know somebody's medical condition, whatever. It could kill somebody. I know. I think that's the worst part was like looking back on it is like if it was predatory at all,

Such a disgusting thing. Like, I mean, and I was in good health. I was fine. It actually happened the next year, too. What?

So that's kind of made... Same guy. Saw the same guy there. So this is what may be... Now we're starting to have a reoccurring problem, Mike. I hate to say it, bro, but it might be you. This is what led me to believe that Micah doesn't burn. Can you imagine it's just regular weed?

Yeah, dude. So the next year, to make the next year briefer, the story briefer, we were there doing the same thing. And I remember being like, obviously, don't do that again. I mean, other people are saying that too. Don't take anything from anyone else. Just don't, especially at a festival. Micah didn't learn.

So like we're there this year with Ryan myself, which we've been veterans at this point. That's probably where I got my false confidence with Justin and Ken. And we're there and not the same dude, but dude does the same thing.

You guys want this? I'm done with it. Sure. I take it. Take a hit. I'll do it. Hand it to Ken. No. What? Yeah, Ken takes a puff too. And then this time was different. But Ken burns. Yeah, Ken burns. So he handled it. And then I remember this was on the lull of the show. So it wasn't a show going on. And I was like, I was like, uh,

Dude, I don't want to explain it. I don't want to glorify any of it all. So I don't want to explain the experience. But then after Ken saw what happened to me,

He was like white face. Ken started freaking out. Just knowing what he was watching. He's like, is this going to happen to me? Seriously, is this going to happen to me? Then he realized it's happening. I'm like kind of holding Mike up, I believe, at the time. Ken's freaking out. I'm like, I need one of you to freak or come on. Because I said this. This is the weirdest, like kind of grossest part. I was like, Ryan, because I knew he was my safe friend.

safe person. Ryan, it's happening. I said that. You're like, it's happening again. I'm like, oh, fuck. I start taking care of Micah. I'm getting him water. All this. Then Ken goes, this is going to happen to me. This is going to happen to me. I'm like, you need to calm down. I need to deal with the one that's dying. It never did happen again. He did great. He burns. Honestly, ever since then, we haven't been doing...

He Bill Clinton. Bill Clinton. He Bill Clinton. Bill Clinton. Elon Musk. Yeah. He learned it. Right. Right. Right. He puffed it, but he didn't inhale. It's a 90s kids thing. I get you. I got it. Yeah. So old. Yeah. So like ever since then, we have not been to a festival, but that's not the reason that we haven't been to a festival.

Mike. There's a reason you shouldn't go to festivals. Maybe. I had a great time. I bet. I had a great time. You stressed me out, Mike. Yeah. You too, honestly.

Well, we've been podcasting for about four hours tonight. I need to go look up where hamsters are from. People checking the time of this podcast. It's only been gone for a minute. No, I'm just kidding. Hey, you got to go check out David's podcast. Yes, sir. What's the name of the podcast? It's a lot better right now, I feel. What? The podcast we recorded earlier today. It's a lot better than the one that we just did? No, it's just a lot different. That's all.

As far as our flow, maybe. You sat us down and you said, you can't say fuck. No, sir. You can cut us off as much as we want on this podcast. This is more of a statement. Our flow was a little better. We're definitely a bit delirious. You just wait. Okay. All right. We actually got to wrap this podcast up. Thank you if you made it to this point. A lot of laughs. A lot of laughs. A lot of random stories. And hope you guys enjoyed. Bye. The table. The table.

No, put the table where you're almost touching. No, the front, right there. Fuck, I put it on Mike, he gave me the touch. I ran it by Ken first. Oh man, peace. Oh my god, remember about Evan breaking things? God damn it, did I break the table? And how I never trusted it? I'll fix it, I'll get some putty in there. God damn it, I'm sorry guys. I told Ken, I was like, break the chair at the close of the podcast. No, I was watching part two.

No, that does suck. That's worse than Kevin breaking the wakeboard. New merch drop this Thursday, 7 o'clock. CboysTV.com We're an absolute mess. We make these videos to entertain you guys, and Evan, Mike, you two need some serious help.

Hi, I'm Angie Hicks, co-founder of Angie. And one thing I've learned is that you buy a house, but you make it a home. Because with every fix, update, and renovation, it becomes a little more your own. So you need all your jobs done well. For nearly 30 years, Angie has helped millions of homeowners hire skilled pros for the projects that matter. From plumbing to electrical, roof repair to deck upgrades. So leave it to the pros who will get your jobs done well. Hire

Hire high quality certified pros at Angie.com. Today's episode is brought to you by Angie. Angie has made it easier than ever to connect with skilled professionals to get all your jobs and projects done well. Let me tell you, there's the version of it where you try to do something at home and then there's a version of it where you have someone help you, you watch them do it the right way and you go, thank God I didn't try to do that myself.

I have fully done things around the home that I think look good and then a bang in the night and I wake up to a shelf collapsing, a painting falling off the wall. Like it, I've seen it all go south. I own a home and I can tell you, I know how much work it can take. Whether it's everyday maintenance and repairs or making dream projects a reality, it can be hard just to know where to start. But now all you need to do is Angie that and find a skilled local pro who will deliver the quality and expertise you need.

Whatever your home project, big or small, indoor or outdoor, you can Angie that and connect with skilled professionals to get the project done well. Right now, one of my wish lists is I want a bike for my condo in Milwaukee and I would love to rig it up on a pulley in the ceiling because I have one of those like lofted ceilings.

But I'm so scared to try that on my own. Angie has 20 years of home experience and they've combined it with new tools to simplify the whole process. Bring them your project online or with the Angie app. Answer a few questions and Angie can handle the rest from start to finish or help you compare quotes from multiple pros and connect instantly, which means you can take care of any home project in just a few taps.

Because when it comes to getting the most out of your home, you can do this when you Angie that. Download the free Angie mobile app today or visit Angie.com. That's A-N-G-I dot com.