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Today's episode is brought to you by Angie. Angie has made it easier than ever to connect with skilled professionals to get all your jobs and projects done well. Let me tell you, there's the version of it where you try to do something at home and then there's a version of it where you have someone help you, you watch them do it the right way and you go, thank God I didn't try to do that myself.
I have fully done things around the home that I think look good and then a bang in the night and I wake up to a shelf collapsing, a painting falling off the wall. Like it, I've seen it all go south. I own a home and I can tell you, I know how much work it can take. Whether it's everyday maintenance and repairs or making dream projects a reality, it can be hard just to know where to start. But now all you need to do is Angie that and find a skilled local pro who will deliver the quality and expertise you need.
Whatever your home project, big or small, indoor or outdoor, you can Angie that and connect with skilled professionals to get the project done well. Right now, one of my wish lists is I want a bike for my condo in Milwaukee and I would love to rig it up on a pulley in the ceiling because I have one of those like lofted ceilings.
but I'm so scared to try that on my own. Angie has 20 years of home experience and they've combined it with new tools to simplify the whole process. Bring them your project online or with the Angie app. Answer a few questions and Angie can handle the rest from start to finish or help you compare quotes from multiple pros and connect instantly, which means you can take care of any home project in just a few taps.
Ryan, you got a lot of balls sitting at this podcast table with me. Why? We got a bone to pick. Why? I'm not happy with you. I'm picking that up. Why?
Well, we'll just start from the top. Oh. Give everyone the context. Yes. I got a DM from a podcast listener, actually. And he goes, yo, I am a photographer for Willow. She's on tour with MGK and we're going to be in Fargo tonight. Do you guys want extra tickets? You guys can all pull up to the show. Hell yeah. Let's do it. Super last minute. We all go to the MGK concert. Me, Ken, Evan, Ryan, and...
and our girlfriends, Greta and Alondra. I'm there having a good time. I was the sober DD driver that night. Thank you for that. So I'm just, you know, just taking everything in. I'm taking a concert in. All my friends are over there having a good time, getting drunk. I'm watching it all play out. And when you're the sober one, you're like, man, so this is what we look like drunk, huh? Well, next thing I know, Ryan's slapping my girlfriend's ass. It was a fucking accident, dude.
Yeah, I'll just skip to it. He was loving that song, man. I'll just skip to it. Ryan slapped Greta's ass. He's going to be shaking and he rises and slaps her. So I'm, you know, pretty caught off guard. I'm like, did I just see that right? Did he slap Alondra's ass too or no? Yeah, I at least hit her. Oh, you were doing both. I was both. He was going for the train. He was playing the fucking drums over there. Yeah, and I'm like, whoa! And he's like...
Well, first, he looks at me and goes, yeah, you like that? I did not do that. And he thought that I was going to match the same energy, you know? He was thinking you brought a pineapple with you. Yeah, yeah. He like, you know, kind of gives me the head nod. Well, I didn't have that same energy. And he's like, oh, oh, my bad. Oh, my bad. I didn't mean to do that. What did Greta do? Oh, she was, you know, felt extremely violated.
Does she really? No, not really. I heard she was cool with it. Whoa. She even thanked him after. What the fuck? Tried to slip in on my five. Huh? So, you know, Ryan's one of my best friends.
I'll let it slide. It was an accident. He keeps saying that. I'm not sure if it was. I'll let it slide. You know, we're business partners. At the end of the day, I really can't hold the grudge against him because I got to be with him every day. But next time the laundry's shaking, you're going to sleep. Well, let's just say that was the second worst thing he did that night. What the hell were you doing, Ryan? Dude, I had like three beers. I was loose. He was acting fool. Like I said, I was the DD that night.
I don't know what they put in those drinks, but you guys blacked. Ken got in the car and was sitting front seat, and he was telling me to take turns that went to a dead end. I thought we were in a different spot, and I was like, oh, just go straight. You can get out this way. Yes. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Ken was hammered. Ken was hammered. Anyway, I'm driving.
Ken's trying to be the backseat driver, telling me where to go. Everything he said was just wrong. Like, you go, hey, McDonald's is open. Let's just pull in and go in. I go, it's not open. There's nobody inside right now. It says closed. And he's like, no, it's not. Goes and checks the door, locked. Then he gets back in and he's like, if you're not going to take my advice, I'm going to stop giving it. And I go, please. Please.
Shut up. Stop talking. Stop telling me what to do. Everything you've said has been wrong. And he's just hammered. Gets out. Waving around. Gets out. Gets loose. Yeah, he's taking a piss in front of everyone in the bus. Ken always does that. Every time. I was like, Ken, we're in town. You can't just do this. You can't do this. You said you'd catch a charge. We should get Ken a shirt and it says Barney Peanut just says public urination. Public urination.
You did do that one time in front of Zorba's, too. You faced the fucking people that were eating. There's families and children out there. There's a giant hill in between the dock and the restaurant. The dock isn't that long. It's like 45 feet. There was kids. What about the kids swimming in the swimming area at the end of the dock? There is no swimming area at the end of that dock. Ken, you have been listening to a lot of R. Kelly lately. All right, so we go through the McDonald's drive-thru line.
Everyone in the backseat is so ham bony. They're like, oh, well,
15 of everything. Oh my God. Our tab was only $60. So we get a bunch of stuff, right? I'm like, the only thing I want is a crispy chicken sandwich. It's the only thing I want. I want a crispy chicken sandwich and a water. One o'clock, I have to wake up at 5.30 tomorrow morning and start editing. I just want a crispy chicken sandwich and a water and I want to get home. I want to go to bed, right? I just want this fucking crispy chicken sandwich. We get the meal.
Ryan grabs my crispy chicken sandwich and takes a bite out of it. He didn't even order a crispy chicken sandwich. There's just no excuse here. Honestly, the other one, there was an excuse, but this one was fucked up. It's a lot worse. He takes my crispy chicken sandwich, takes a bite out of it, again, looks at me and smiles. Did not. Did not. That's what it felt like. I'm sure he did, though. I go, hey, where's my crispy chicken sandwich?
Ryan goes, oh, this one? Holds it up with a bite out of it. A bite out of it. And then the guy has the audacity to go, oh, hand this up to Ben. So then I get my crispy chicken sandwich that I've been looking forward to with a fucking bite out of it. It was a big bite, too. I was hungry. Knowing that Ryan had just violated everything that just the disrespect he had for me that night. The first one was an accident, and so was the second one.
Someone handed me a crispy chicken sandwich, and I went, this looks really good because we ordered for 15 minutes. Wait, wait, wait. Did Greta hand you that crispy chicken sandwich? No, I'm pretty sure it was Alondra. Thank you. Okay, I was going to say, we got a problem if that's the case.
Then I was going to say, Brian, you've been baited. Can I just ask one thing? Brian, how the hell did you accidentally slap? Dude, I don't know. I literally don't know. It's just like I walked back and I hit a laundry and then it just – You saw another one. I saw another one. Never in my life have I ever done anything like that, and I did it and my blood ran cold. I was like ready to turn around. The second I did it, I just was like.
Oh, fuck. Did Greta turn around, though? She, like, turned around, and then I was like, oh, fuck. It's Ryan standing there. Holding, like, a beer. I'm like, I look at Ben, I go, I'm sorry. I'm sorry. And he's like, what? Because he hadn't even realized what happened yet. What did Greta say? I just apologized a lot, and I think she said it was okay. Be nice, you know. It was bad. It was a bad night. What did Alondra do? She thought it was funny? No, dude. She beat my ass. Holy shit. Just like you were doing to Greta. Yes.
I got a pretty funny story to tell you guys. So obviously, well, you guys know, but the podcast listeners don't.
So my girlfriend works at a plastic surgery clinic, and they also do aesthetics. So moral of the story is a lot of women work there, and they're all very good-looking women. If you didn't pick that up by the two things that CJ said. I just feel like that should be put in the story before I go on. Anyways, they were having some kind of team retreat thing. They were going out for a nice dinner. They were asking if they could use our limo.
And I was like, yeah, that's fine, I guess. I'm not going to be able to drive you because I have to edit that day, but I'll have Evan drive you guys. Or Ken. Evan or Ken. Maybe both of them, actually, just so they can co-pilot it. Isn't it funny how good-looking women just get a special pass because you know how many people ask to use their limo and we always just go, nope. But they were Alex's co-workers. Yeah, it's different. It was my girlfriend's and I don't know. They're good. They're nice people, whatever. So anyways...
Evan and Ken go and drive them to Spanky's.
First off, there's this really good-looking mom that was into Ken, taking pictures with him. Pop it up. Classic. We don't need to go that much further into it. But anyways, so they drop him off. They come back. I'm in a grueling editing day. It was a day after MGK concert. I'm running on literally three hours of sleep because I wasn't sober like Ben. I'm sitting there trying to – this is a tough day. So we're pulling into the inn parking lot, and they give me a call. I'm like, hey, can you come pick us up in the limo?
I'm like, I thought you guys said you just needed to ride there. I was wondering about that. I didn't want to ask too many questions, but they were just like, just there. So I'm like, I really don't want to because, like, I don't know. Like, can't you find something else? And then they're like, no, please, please, please. I call this. I'm like, fine. All right, I'll pick you up. Mid of me saying I'll pick you up, they just hang up on me.
Damn. I know. I'm like, what the fuck? Like, what's going on? Goes back to like good looking women getting what they want. And then I'm trying to like... Never heard no before. Yeah. I'm like trying to text them like, so am I coming to pick you up or not? Because like I'm sitting here at the end. I want to have a beer. But if I'm driving you guys on a limo, I won't. Like, it's like at this point, halfway through the meal, I'm still trying to figure out I'm picking them up. So I'm drinking water. Yep. Terrible. Finally, they're like...
Like, yeah, I mean, if you don't mind, but you sure seem like you don't want to. I'm like, Jesus. Okay, I'll come pick you up. And Evan's going to come with to help me co-pilot. So I show up to pick him up. They all know Evan already. Except Ivan. They thought his name was Ivan. They were calling him Ivan? They're going nuts. No, so we go and drop off, like, the surgeon and his wife. And then the other girls wanted to go to Zorba's. Next thing I know, Evan's in the back with them. And it's like music bumping. Okay.
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I guess there's not a whole lot more to the story. But it was just really funny. Evan was just in heaven, though? Yeah, Evan was having a great time. And then he thanked me after. He's like, hey, man, thanks again just for everything you guys do to me. For me, like... It's the perks of the job. No. I was wondering why yesterday you were just going around, Ivan, Ivan. That's literally what I heard. Why is CJ saying this? The whole night. Oh.
So, okay, rewind a little bit, though. That mom that was into Ken, taking the pictures with Ken. Ken, if she was into you, why'd you dip on her like that? That is true. We were just dropping them off. No, no, I will say. So when we got done eating, they wanted us to come pick them up. And you were like, I'm going to bed. I'm going to bed, man. I'm dipping. This was the day after the NGK concert where I was incredibly hungover. Canada had a hard day. You got all these good-looking women in a limo, and you could just at least ride in the back with them.
I called it. I went to bed. I had a great night. It could have been yelling. Something like that. Yeah. And it just don't understand. Even if the mom wasn't in you like that way, you know, at least it's just fun to be there. Ryan, you should know from experience. Sometimes you just want to go to bed early and just stay in for the night. You don't need to go out every night. You know what? Fair enough. Fair enough. Yeah.
The other last thing I need to say is, like, they kept asking to borrow the limo, and Alex is, like, saying, I'm like, dude, do they know how fucking shitty this thing is? Like, why don't they just get a party bus? Like, why do they want our limo? This thing is literally a beater. Like, there's rust falling off of it. It's not that nice. It's not that bad. It's not, but also, you're looking at, like, I just figured...
For what they're used to, they would probably just want to... Well, most people aren't used to having a limo. No, it's not that. Just... I don't know. You look at them and you look at our limo and you're like, they probably shouldn't roll up in that. The old one, I would agree. The no AC, smelt like rat shit everywhere. The new one, though...
It's at least a 4 out of 10. They all had a blast, though. I'm not kidding you. I guess they had the best night. Really? Literally the best night. Well, that does add to kind of the shittier limo experience because it's not like you have to be all like bougie and balling and shit. You can like spill a drink and it's not the end of the world. I actually know where I was going with that whole story. You had your sober driving night, and I guess it was a horror story, and my sober driving night, which I think that was like the first time I've ever done that. I've never even driven a limo.
Really? Best time. It was a blast, honestly. I had a good time. You should do it tonight. No, no, no. I won't do it again. I was living like, I think it was just super fun for me because Evan was in the back having such a good time and them chanting Ivan that I was just like, I'll drive you guys wherever you want to go. I'll drive you anywhere. It is more fun when people are having fun. Yeah. They were having so much fun and they were so appreciative and Evan was just having a blast that it was just, or Ivan, I should say.
It was a good time. Ken. That could have been you, though, Ken. Your argument is pretty invalid because the MGK night, Ivan was so drunk, he passed out in the back of the car. So he said he woke up and he said it was one of the worst hangovers he's ever had. And he still went out. He still had a good time. Yeah, I just didn't want to do that, though. I wanted to go to bed early and, like, have my Friday where I could actually, like, get stuff done. Yeah.
Finish the wiring on the one AC unit. We have air conditioning now, though, so be thankful for that. I actually have had no problems with not having air conditioning. Because there's an air conditioner in here. Because you guys like block the door way off. Of course you don't. Hi, I'm Angie Hicks, co-founder of Angie. And one thing I've learned is that you buy a house, but you make it a home.
♪♪♪
Today's episode is brought to you by Angie. Angie has made it easier than ever to connect with skilled professionals to get all your jobs and projects done well. Let me tell you, there's the version of it where you try to do something at home, and then there's a version of it where you have someone help you, you watch them do it the right way, and you go, thank God I didn't try to do that myself.
I have fully done things around the home that I think look good and then a bang in the night and I wake up to a shelf collapsing, a painting falling off the wall. Like it, I've seen it all go south. I own a home and I can tell you, I know how much work it can take. Whether it's everyday maintenance and repairs or making dream projects a reality, it can be hard just to know where to start. But now all you need to do is Angie that and find a skilled local pro who will deliver the quality and expertise you need.
Whatever your home project, big or small, indoor or outdoor, you can Angie that and connect with skilled professionals to get the project done well. Right now, one of my wish lists is I want a bike for my condo in Milwaukee and I would love to rig it up on a pulley in the ceiling because I have one of those like lofted ceilings.
but I'm so scared to try that on my own. Angie has 20 years of home experience and they've combined it with new tools to simplify the whole process. Bring them your project online or with the Angie app. Answer a few questions and Angie can handle the rest from start to finish or help you compare quotes from multiple pros and connect instantly, which means you can take care of any home project in just a few taps.
Because when it comes to getting the most out of your home, you can do this when you Angie that. Download the free Angie mobile app today or visit Angie.com. That's A-N-G-I dot com. Okay. Anyway. Anyway. Yeah, it's not that hot in my room. The little air conditioner that air conditions my office does pretty good. It's making the rest of the shop extremely hot. It just blows all the hot air back into the shop. Mike is sitting in his office, no shirt on, sweating his ass off. All right. Well...
Anyway. I was thinking about that when Ken finally got the AC going. I've felt cold AC a million times in my life. Very privileged of you to say, Ryan. A lot of people have. People in Europe right now are dying. You know that? People in Europe don't have AC. People in air conditioning? Dude, I guess like most of the world doesn't have, obviously, you could expect like places in Africa to not have air conditioning. But like...
of people in the world do not have air conditioning. And it's like, bro, it's like 90 degrees in Europe right now and people are dying. Holy fuck. Yeah. Yeah.
They should have Ken come over and install a split unit. No. He's going to be too tired. He's going to be too tired. Big Ken, yeah. Once this thing is done, I am done doing this. No, Ken, you need to get over there and start saving lives. This is a nightmare you're trying to put together. Nightmare? Nightmare. So it's like a three-minute YouTube video. It's like, oh, you can get this done in two hours. I've spent three days on this.
But I was thinking, and it kind of goes back to the limos too, that something that you take for granted that worked. Like in our old limo, when we first got it, the brakes didn't work, which I know sounds actually crazy to think that we drove that limo around with all of our friends. Yeah, we made like a mile. And I fixed the brakes. Me. Me. And I remember the first time we drove and I hit the brakes and it stopped. And I went, oh my God, I can't believe brakes work.
Like, it's just crazy. It's just crazy that you can press a pedal and the whole vehicle stops. And that's how I felt about that. And then you get used to it really quick. Yeah, exactly. So, and then, and then you're stopping at every stop sign and then you're just become a tainted little bitch. Exactly. We used to roll through these. We used to have to downshift to try to get the thing to slow down enough so we could just barely slide through it. Moral of the story, uh, turn off your AC and cut the brake lines on your car. I have no idea. How did we even get on this topic? Well,
Well, I just said I was thankful for the AC when it happened. It's one of those things that you get used to. You go, oh, yeah, cold AC. You walk into your house and you never think, oh, my God, it feels so good in here. But you walk in the shop today and it's like you can't help but not think about it. I know. I could sit in here all day. I'm not sweating right now. I'm pretty blessed. You know what's pretty crazy is we're kind of in the crossfires of energy drink companies sending us energy drinks. We are. We are.
I mean, I'm just going to say it. One of the sickest things. Right. Right. But it's like pretty wild. Like every other day, I feel like we're getting like a case of some energy drink. Send us some stuff, too. Really? Yeah. Rich, rich mention. Oh, we're going to send him a pallet.
Holy shit. I know. So we're going to literally have the only brand we're missing now is Rockstar. That's probably fine. I mean, at this point, we have so many energy drinks. I don't know what to do with it. I just start giving them away. I'm like, hey, man, here. Yeah, we are on the crossfire, though. So obviously clutch down us a pallet. But then Red Bull just out of nowhere starts sending us just on like a little rotate. Like, it's like once a week we get like.
Two big boxes. No, they're like 24 packs. We'll get two of those. So we have 48 every week show up. 48 Red Bull games. It initially started off as like one little four pack. I was so confused though because they addressed the next one to me and I haven't talked to anyone. I have no idea.
I have no idea. It showed up. The FedEx guy shows up, drops off, and Ryan goes, oh, you got something, CJ? It's kind of heavy. I'm like, what? I didn't order anything. CJ opened it up, and I go, this is how every show starts, and then it's a bomb. Whoa. Yeah. Every show? Every show that a perfect doesn't know, they go, oh, you got a package. I don't know what it is. Bomb. And then it goes into a crime investigation. Big Ken and you are trying to track down...
the killers of Mean Ryan. What the fuck? What are you guys watching? He did say that. That's some CSI, man. Ted Bundy shit right there. Yeah. Sure. The Unabomber. Yeah. The Unabomber
hates our podcast he's listening to it in jail right now is he still alive yeah yeah he's in like maximum maximum interesting security if you if you haven't watched that i don't remember the name it's just you search unabomber on netflix they have they have two different variations of shows on it and the one that's like a reenactment is so good they made like a whole i think it's an eight episode show all those shows are insanely interesting like the um
The Olympic bombing one. That one. That's a really good one. It's the same thing where it's like a reenactment. That was crazy, dude. I felt so bad for that guy. He got framed, dude. Oh, yeah. It's just a typical situation of the police not doing their job right. Yeah, wild. Anyway, back to the energy drinks. Man, we got a little sidebar there. Yeah, so Clutch, Red Bull, Grand Prix.
Gravity coffee. Yeah, you got the gravity energy. Man, we're just like... We're just walking around just buzzing now. I actually think the energy drinks don't do anything for me anymore. You had too much. I've had so many that it's like... Do you guys feel like...
You crash way, way harder. No, I just keep drinking them all day long. Because we have so many. I don't know. I am worried. We don't have room for waters in the fridge. We just have energy drinks. I am worried that I have been drinking so much energy drinks that...
I would like not be able to have a normal energy cycle in my day. Like, I feel like I'm tired and I'm like, Oh, better drink another energy drink. Yeah, I know. Yeah. I don't really know. Yeah. I've been feeling really tired lately, which I think just comes to not having that much sleep. We don't sleep that much. I've tried to only like drink them in the morning. Cause I find,
If it's after like 2 or 3 o'clock, I just can't get to sleep quick. It's always like I'm just tossing and turning. But it is nice having a lot of options because you can shop for which one's the healthiest. And I won't say which one is. But it is nice because you have options. You should have seen the look on my parents' face when I told them I drink at least one energy drink a day. They go...
I'm sure they probably thought. They were like, what? Are you joking? No, I'm just crying. I'll drink a coffee and then an energy drink right after. I try to only do it on days that I'm editing. Yeah, it's smart. But then when I'm editing, I'm so drained. I feel like it almost doesn't even do anything. And then...
It eventually hits and it's like hits right towards the end of the day. And I'm just like buzzing. I'm just going to have it earlier. It doesn't. No, no. Like I drink it at like 11 and it doesn't hit until like, you remember what Haley was saying? She drinks like three monsters a day. It cannot be good. Or she, maybe it was two now, but she was like, yeah, you string like five a day. I don't know. We had it on a podcast. She said it, whatever the number was, pull it up. I'm a caffeine addict. I'll admit it like bad. Like,
We are too over here. And so it got to an unhealthy point where I drank three energy drinks. Because I was waking up at 5 a.m. and then driving two and a half hours to go to the simulator. I would drink two to three energy drinks in the span of two hours in the morning. Holy shit. It was bad. I love it, though. They taste great. They give you energy. And obviously you need the caffeine. Caffeine is good for you, actually. It helps you burn fat.
And also it suppresses your appetite. Does it do anything? Caffeine suppresses your appetite. Really? Yeah, so is that good for you though? That just makes you not hungry. I'd say yeah. Maybe for like weight, gaining weight. Yeah, but like is that good for you? Something that's suppressing your appetite might do you some good. Okay. Fuck.
No, that's true though. So if you ever wake up in the morning, drink, start drinking some coffee. I'm not kidding you. I'll always brew coffee and I'll drink it out of my Yeti cup, whatever in the morning. And I can...
Don't even have to have breakfast. I have no idea. And then once you finish that cup of coffee, grab yourself an energy drink, crack that. Sugar-free, of course. Drink it. And then once you get done with that, just drink another one or two. And that should bring you to 5 o'clock, and then you can eat dinner. By that time, it's like 11. So then I'll eat lunch. I was going to say about noon. Then you call into like...
The pit or the roadhouse or the inn. Get takeout. You get some takeout. Right. Some steak bites or some wings. There's such a stellar diet. Yeah, I know. We need a crisp and green out here. Dude, I went to crisp and green. The place is lacking, man. I don't know. They fell off? It used to be so good. Why? Because they did like an employee rotation and you didn't know anyone. I walk in there and no one even said what's up. They didn't treat you like a god. Oh, what can I get? Hey! CJ goes,
What can I get for you? They're just a little less friendly. We're jumping right into it then, huh? I know there's a long line behind me, but we're not going to talk for five minutes. Be like, you don't even care about my week? Not even ask me about my day? Sorry.
Micah just texted us. He was supposed to be here for the podcast, but he obviously was not. He was hanging with Big Reno at Big Reno's Bar in Fargo. Can we screen record this and put this up on his – I don't know why. It's just so funny, dude. Micah was hammered. God, I love Micah. I know I give him a lot of shit, but Micah is so funny, dude. I get such a kick out of just him doing his life.
He just texted, misplaced my phone last night and had to track it down, but I'll be back by 12. Might be, guys. I know we were trying to run the pod at 11 so we could enjoy the day. Don't worry, Mike. We're already running it. Let's see. Where's he at? So the best thing is, yeah, he said he'll be back by 12. He's just leaving town right now, and it's 11.50. Yeah, and so now it is 12, basically, and he is still not even left. You want to know, though? I...
At least he was hanging with Big Reno. That's true. You know, it was for a good cause. The best way to operate things with Mike involved is to just not care if he's there or not. It is. Like, that's the only way that we've continued to just, like –
not get mad at him for just not showing up ever or just like completely dropping the ball on things. Just don't expect anything from him. Basically. Yes. Yes. Basically, if he's there, it's an added bonus. If not, we got somebody that can just stand in. You just got to lie about what your due date is and like,
Like this time, we want to do the podcast at noon. So you got to say, Hey, we got to do the podcast at 11. But even today on Mike's time though, we would have had to have tell him, yo dude, we're going to do this podcast at seven 30 in the morning. But then he would have just been like, well, I'm not going to make that. You can only be so like ridiculous with your times. I don't even really get that mad anymore at this point.
Yeah, I don't either because I feel like it's just like, it's just Mike. Dude, he's listening to this right now. He's like, finally, it took him six freaking years to find a not-care. It's working. No, no, it's just, we're just used to it. I know I give Mike, I just want to say this, I know I give Mike a lot of shit because he's just funny, like the hot dog thing and whatever else. He's kind of embraced that now. But Mike is honestly a superstar.
He is. He's so funny. Good kid. And he's a good guy. He's not here right now to hear me say this, but it's true. I'll say it to the listeners. Like when we were pulling up, but he is also very predictable. I've known him. I know him now. It's like, for instance, we're in the mud staying and he mentioned, oh, there's a graffiti bridge up here. I used to, I used to graffiti down here. I go, no way. Well, let's go pull up and on the video and check it out. That'd be funny.
And I tell you guys, I go, he probably wrote his name. I was just genuinely thinking. And he goes, I wouldn't do that. I'm like, dude, I don't know. It sounds like something you do, just incriminate yourself. We get there. He's like, yeah, well, I did post some pics of me spray painting to my Facebook. I'm like, dude, that's worse than writing your name.
Just doesn't. No fucks. I love when we get Mike going. Like when we're all like teaming up on him and just like harassing him about something. And he always has the same, no, no, that's not true. That's not true. Like he'll just cut you off when you're talking. And then we'll all just talk over him. And he'll, no, no. Yeah, dude, fuck. We got a great...
Friend group, I'm just going to say it. It's so funny and can't make this happen. It just either it does or it doesn't. Yeah, fuck it. I guess I like you guys. I think we got a good thing going. I guess the chemistry works pretty well. Pretty funny together. No, it is funny, though. You love hanging out with other people and stuff like that, but when you come back to the crew, you're just like, ah, fuck.
It's effortless. Yes, it's effortless, fun. We can be quiet together or we can be cracking jokes and rolling whatever and it's fun. Right. Like the stuff that we say before we sit down on the podcast is always the funniest. I always say like, I wish we could put this on the pod, but I just can't.
That's how we warm up. We say everything we can't. You can't say, uh... And then it cuts in, right? When Ben's talking about Ryan slapping his girl's ass. So it's somewhere between whatever else we're going to talk about and that. And that was out of bounds. That's one of the things where we're like, all right, finally we can put this in the podcast. All right. This is how we can start it. Start it. We just start it really fucked up and then move into less and less. I feel like, uh...
probably anyone at home even has a friend group that there's so many funny things about your friends and if you feel like you don't just get to know them more that's all you got hey tint just stand stand over there i want i want to see your reaction when i say this oh boy so you gotta get down all right so um if you guys saw the video where we surprised tint with a new set of wheels and then mark a rolly um
There was a lot of comments asking if Tint and Mark were gay lovers. I thought they were going to say who's the favorite. People were wondering. They weren't saying it as a joke. No, no, no. Are they seriously together? I've been wondering for the longest time. Because they're always together and they...
Tint's always shirtless walking around. It's just Mark and Tint hanging out in Tint's shirtless, bouncing around, working on their houses together and shit. We're at the lake. So I guess we brought you on here to ask you. You want to clear the air? Are you and Mark? No, nowhere near that. Tint? Tint, it's just between us. No, not even close. No, the cameras aren't filming. No. No, seriously, we'll cut this out. Right. Not even close. Tint.
Okay. Far from it. All right. Okay. All right. The people want to know, though. He's clear. He's clear. I felt like we owed them an explanation. I will say, I will vouch for Tint. He's not gay. Oh, I know. We're just messing with you. It is funny. Well, because people really don't know anything about Mark and Tint. They're just in the background of all of our videos, and they're just always together. So I've had people who are starting to wonder, like, all right, what's going on with these guys? I think we need to have a Mark interview.
And tint podcast. Yeah. And it's realistically the, the podcast listeners are pretty diehard. So they'd probably be curious to know, I don't know, comment down below if you guys want that. Everyone's just like, no, no, they'll, they'll want it. I feel like so. I love that. Uh, tint is obviously not even tense name.
But he's just another person. Nobody else knows your real name. Even when we got pulled over by the DNR, he goes, so who are you? And you introduced yourself as Tint. I remember that. Yeah, he said, don't worry about it. He's like, seriously, he goes, I'm Tint. I think it's in the video.
That's actually amazing. Yeah, I know. It's so funny how we were able to like bring a friend in and then we just give them a new name and then we just are like, nope, this is your name. And then eventually they're just like, I guess this is my name. Dude, Evan's a dude.
Ivan. No, but like Dude Evan Bro. Like I just called him Dude Evan Bro for like the first four times that we hung out and then he just changed his Instagram to it because he was like, honestly, this is just my name now. Well, it's because people started looking him up and they're like, I don't know what's his name. Dude Evan Bro. That's what they're used to being searched by. Yeah. It's like Ken.
He finally, I remember, changed his name on Instagram to Ken, all the socials. You know what's funny? The IRS is probably doing so much digging, and they cannot find a Ken Matthews. Who's this Ken guy? Ken guy. Ken guy.
Oh, my God. He hasn't been paying his taxes. We have no record of him. He's done such a good job of staying off the grid. It's amazing. There's nothing we can do to trace him. I don't even have a birth receipt. They're like, he's a ghost. He's an illegal immigrant. You need to legally change your name to Ken. That's what I've been saying. We should do it for a video. I think you should, Ken. You can change it back if you ever want to. Main channel type thing, like how many, what do you want? Likes, subs?
I'm not going to lie. I don't want to do that just because it sounds like an absolute nightmare trying to change everything. Nightmare. Stop saying nightmare. Did you say nightmare? Nightmare. Nightmare. Say it again. Try it again. Nightmare. No, seriously. Nightmare. Nightmare. Yeah. But no, it sounds like an absolute hassle, like trying to change everything. But half of your stuff is already. Yeah.
Like the banks, the credit cards, you have to change everything though. That's true. You can just fly under the radar. But it is so hard because when like the shipping guy, I don't know if the shipping guy even asked you, I go, does he know you as Ken or Grant? And he, and you're like, ah, I don't even know. I don't think I ever, ever told him my name. Honestly.
He actually asked me because he didn't even know who your name was. Well, that is his fault because Steve and I, and his name is actually Steve, have done a lot of business. Ken, it is actually funny because when you're doing things that aren't even related to Seaboys...
like us going to get a countertop. We show up and Ken had already been talking. She goes, now, which one of you is Ken? I'm like, so he called this on his own time. He's like, yeah, Ken, let me know. Ken Matthews. That's awesome. No, I think it's, yeah, it makes sense. You're just used to it. Yeah. He legit changed his name. No, one time. Yeah.
Ken and I had a class together in college and one class and in class I called him Ken and I wrote on like our worksheets and stuff together. Like it would be like Brian Iwerks and then I'd go Ken Matthews. And literally the teacher was like, wait, so what's your name? Is it Ken or is it your government name? And I'd just be like, oh no, it's just his nickname. And they're like, yeah, but you're like writing his nickname on his, do you want to be called Ken? And I, I,
Don't think I did, but I should have been like, yeah, you need to call Ken in class. The only time giving a nickname has ever backfired is giving Ryan's girlfriend Alondra's name Donda, which I still think is a great name. Yeah. I know, but it's tough when you don't... Why does she not like it? I honestly don't really know because I've heard her other nicknames and they're terrible. Yeah. Like, her friends did not come up with that good of nicknames for her, but apparently she doesn't like this one and I don't... I've asked why and she's like, I don't like it. I thought it was a cute nickname. And I just...
as a good boyfriend that I am, I just can't be like, I, I actually respect Donda, Donda. I say both versions enough where I correct myself every time after I say Donna, I go, sorry, Ben doesn't. I think it's just like, I mean, I just don't, then I just will just not call her by her name. Cause I like, ah, Hey, can you, uh,
Do that, which I feel like then is just disrespectful. I just don't get it. I just don't get it. It's a good name, I think. I think some people are just like, they don't like nicknames, and they just want to go by their name, and it's just like, I think that's how she is. She doesn't like anything other than Alondra. It's a great name, but fair enough. Yeah, I mean, that's fine, I guess, but that's, I guess, really the only time, like, a nickname has... Actually backfired on us. Well, someone's told us. I'm sure...
Buddy doesn't like being called Tint all the time. He loves it. It only just makes Tint more money. That's true. Well, now you've changed everything. Tint's cars. Why is your name Tint? Oh, I tint cars. Oh, I get my car tinted. Yeah. Oh, that's true. There we go. Like I said, I have like five different nicknames. That's true. And then we came in and we just vetoed them all and we just went straight to the basis. What do you do for a living? I tint cars. Tint. Well, it is funny because it started before we were really good friends. Yeah.
And it was because we couldn't quite lock down who was Mark and who was Tint. I just called both of them Mark. I was drunk one night. Yeah, tell the story. This was years ago. He can sit down. This was years ago. So, like, this was long before Alex. I was single. And we had just met Mark and Tint. I mean, how funny. What a story. You know, we meet them four years ago or three years ago, and now we're, like, best friends. But anyways, I run into Tint.
which I thought his name was Mark, downtown Fargo. And he's talking to the same little duo of girls that I was talking to. And I'm like, yeah, my buddy Mark, my buddy Mark. And he just started rolling with it. Oh, yeah. I can't believe you just took it. Why didn't you just correct him on the first one? I couldn't. You just do it again. So dumb.
Can't fix it. He was feeling good. Sometimes you just got to let people dig their own hole and see how deep they can get in it. Yeah, it's like when you try and stop a rager from getting in a fight or something like that. It just makes it worse. When you try and stop someone stupid from just being more dumb. Yeah, it ends up coming down on you. Yeah. That's bad.
So you just let him roll with it. Oh, yeah. For sure. So he called you Mark the entire night. Weren't the girls like... They thought his name was Mark, too. Oh, really? Well, I was introducing him as Mark. Was Mark there? Here's my friend Mark. Oh, so you... Okay. It was just me. Why'd you think that? I don't know. You just knew that one of them was Mark. I was calling everyone on the boat Mark that day. Man. It'll make them as dumb as they used to. I'm actually really bad with names.
I am terrible at names. It's not being bad with names. It's just not caring enough to know. Oh, no. I'm just bad with names. In my defense, I've hit my head a lot of times. That's a terrible defense. Yeah, but if you met somebody where you knew that they were somebody and you actually cared enough to remember their name versus just hopping on and just meeting someone and just being like, what's up? What's up? Well, I got a lot going on, man. I'm not blaming you. I do this to people. You ever have it where you meet someone?
And while you're shaking their hand, you're worried about like being nice, smiling. You're like, hey, how's it going? CJ. And they say, nice, my name is Eric. And then I'm just like, I was so worried about just introducing myself that I blacked out. Don't even know what their name is now. And now it's right after that. We just said each other's names. I'm like, I didn't...
I don't remember a single thing. And then how bad is it at the end when you go, what was your name again? It's better to do that than call him the wrong name. What about that one time where we were at Hay Days and Ken introduced himself as CJ? I don't know why I just blacked out and fucked up. Ken shook a guy's hand and he goes, hey, I'm Mark. Hey, I'm Mark. And Ken goes, CJ. I think...
I think I was literally looking at you and I was like, CJ. Yeah, we go down the line. This guy from Arctic Cat, this is like years ago, to come meet us as we're setting up. Hey, what's going on, boys? I heard a little bit about you, whatever. Shakes our hands. You know, I'm so-and-so. Ben, Ryan, Micah. And then Ken's up next and Ken goes, CJ. And I go like this. I look, I'm like, who the fuck is this?
the fuck am I then? What do you want? I looked, I'm like, why are we switching names? I'm like, am I supposed to say Ken? I was just like, I sat there. I was like, just like, it was like, pause for a second. And then all of a sudden, everyone was like,
Right in front of this guy. The guy had no idea what was going on. So his name isn't CJ. And he ended up just walking away because we were literally on the ground rolling at Ken's age CJ. We're literally crying. We're just like, here's some of them. What's going on? My name's CJ. I'm like, I just fucked that one up royally. Ken, what are you doing here, man? What are we doing? Role play. Ken's like,
We look over, Ken's wearing the light wide open with a backwards hat. Ken grows his hair out, so he's flipping it out. What's going on, man?
That was so funny, dude. That's one of those things I just wish we had on camera. That was such a beautiful, just a beautiful moment. That is so funny, dude. Like, who does that? Well, clearly I fucked it up. I know. It's just so funny. Like, you literally can't make that shit up. Just so beautifully genuine. Just some good humor. That's what I'm saying, though. Ken's a superstar. That's going to be the best day ever.
don't know if I ever will forget about that one no that one was just like I'm so glad it happened like I was the other guy it's just so funny to me
I think it would have been better if he'd like you and addressed yourself and then Ken did it right after you. We should start doing that. I'm also CJ. The guy goes, oh, two CJs. We're like two CJs. I'm going to start going around and stuff. I'm Ken. Don't be an asshole. It's like when I drive your Lamborghini. Then people will start going, man, that Ken from Seaboys TV, he's a real asshole.
I was driving Ben's Lambo one day and I was just driving like such a dick weed. I was fucking downshifting, accelerating, making just the most noise, speeding. And then Ben's like, dude, you're making me look bad. I was like, I know. Yeah, dude. Well, I mean, like we said in the last one, like so many people have driven it.
And like every time somebody drives it, they just drive it way harder than like I ever do. Like they're just downshifting, like doing pulls past neighborhood houses and stuff. So then.
I was out and about and one of our buddies is a cop and he's like, hey, dude, just letting you know, like that car's hot. Like like people have been talking about it, like in the departments and shit. And like it's been ripping through neighborhoods. I'm like, that's not me. I know it sounds like this is like it sounds like something that I would say if I was like, oh, it's not me. But it's actually I'm not doing that.
Like, the kid that I let take it to prom was, like, fucking street racing it, like, literally through, like, a neighborhood. Yeah. And I'm sure that was pissing everyone off. And they're like, oh, white Lamborghini. Yeah. Yeah, I'm like, dude. There's one Lamborghini in the entire area. It's exactly what they expect us to be doing. Yeah. And you got your dad. When, in reality, we really don't cause that much havoc.
I guess kind of speaking of that too, I wanted to dive into this because I think a lot of the listeners right now are younger, might be confused. They might have it twisted. Driving by somebody, if you have like a loud car or a loud truck or a loud crotch rocket and there's people outside and like downshifting and like ripping by so they like hear the exhaust or like see you going fast. I just got to tell you this. I don't know if anybody has.
People don't think it's cool. Common misconception. Common misconception, but I think people got to know. It's like, don't do it. Once you get a little older, it kind of changes your perspective on like, this isn't okay to do. Ken's that new Pelican person now that's walking down the street shaking his hand. You are turning into that guy. You're getting older. You kind of realize you shouldn't do this. You shouldn't do something like that.
You shouldn't do some things in certain spots. Like pee out in public. He's still working on that one. With your dick out 50 feet away from a children's playground. That is completely different. You love just attaching onto one little thing and never letting go of it. It's fun doing it.
Ken's never going to pee. I mean, if Evan was here, tell a whole different story about the Ken on the boat last weekend. Yeah, dude. Evan's so... Yeah, we were sitting on Alex's, my girlfriend's boat, and Ken was like...
Ken's nutsack, I guess, fell out of his shorts. They did not fall out of his shorts. It was one nut. Okay, so one ball was hanging out of his shorts. It was sitting on the seat. They were never out of their shorts. He was wearing orange swim trunks, and so he had like an orange net. So Evan talks about it like it's an orange in like a fruit sack.
But the funniest thing is that they were hanging out of shorts. They were not hanging out of my shorts. His netting, he was busting them out. So it's like this nutsack, and the netting is pressed out. It was sitting out and resting on the seat. And Nikki, Evan's girlfriend, was sitting there staring at it for like five minutes, dude, before she said something. It was not five minutes. And then finally, Evan goes, dude, Ken, you're nuts hanging out, homie. Everyone looks...
And Ken, like, pulls it back in his short, and there's a little sweat spot sitting on the seat from it resting there.
Dude, I think that's awesome. A sweat spot! I wish my nuts hung out mine. This story went from this to this. That's what they were. They were that big. He's like a bowl, dude. A sweat spot! When he walks, they go like this. I love that something new gets added every time this story gets told. It was like a sack of melon just hanging out. Evan has not stopped talking about it. He has not stopped talking about it. He said...
So I'm at home the other day and I go to the grocery store, a place where you should be able to go and not think about Ken's nutsack. And what do I see? I see two grapefruits sitting there. And guess what I thought about? Ken's nuts. Ken's nuts. That's not right. That's not right. I shouldn't be put in that position, Ken. You scarred Evan and you made him also look bad in front of his own girlfriend. Thank God Alex didn't see it. That's not my problem. Why are you so small?
Dude, Ken hates when we tell that story. It's because you add something new that's just a complete fabrication every single time. Dude, if I was walking around with two absolute cantaloupes, I would let those things hang out of my tiny swim trunks too. They were not that small. They just rolled up really fast. They weren't that small, man. They were hanging to his knees and nuts still. We're going to give him some capris or something to keep these things hidden.
Imagine Ken walking around in some capris. Oh, Ken! He's here! Let's go! Jeez, Steve. Looking like Greta the other night. Ryan, stay over there. Is that bad at twerking? No, Ryan just slapped Greta's ass. What? Yeah. You missed it. I was so embarrassed of it, I didn't want to tell Steve.
Yeah. I wish I could have seen that. That's so funny. Yeah. Right in front of me. I mean. Greta liked it. Ben was mad. I'd rather have him do it in front of you. Yeah. That's probably true. Yeah. It'd be weirder if he was doing it on the side. Yeah.
Right, right, right. Well, I'm stoked to walk in and see Tint on the podcast. Yeah, he's a good kid. Stoked. I don't care what you say about him. Yeah. I never have. Yeah, and I actually didn't even say anything, so I'm glad you don't care. Whatever everyone else says about Tint, it doesn't matter. I think he's a decent guy. My favorite thing is that after we got him the wheels, he didn't change. He stayed the same. It was great. Right. Whereas Mark, haven't seen him since. He walks around kind of like this. He's different. Hey, Mike.
So how was Big Reno's bar last night? Did you get the VIP access? Dude, yeah. I saw you and him up on top and everyone else was down low, but you couldn't bring Sidney up with you. It was so funny. I just went up there to chat with him for a sec, but I went up there. And you hung up there all night. No, but instantly the bouncer, like I'm speaking to Big Reno. We're dapping up like it's great. And the bouncer comes up like kind of as we're doing that, as we're vibing out. And he's like, you can't be up here, bro. And I'm like,
Can you tell him, Big Reno? Did Big Reno say he's your cool? He literally goes to Big Reno and he's just like, he can't be up here. And Big Reno's like,
He's good, bro. Big Reno's bar looks electric. I need to go check that out. It was super fun, and he gave me, like, three shots. So you were feeling it? No, I messed up, dude. Sydney gave me her purse to keep it on. I saw that. You were on the story holding the purse. Wait, I didn't lose it. Yeah, I mean, yeah. I set it down and, like, had my arm on it right, and then some subs came up, and they're like, oh, we'll get you a drink, and the bar is, like, so...
Table, purse, bars right there. Somebody stole it? No, they didn't steal it. He just lost it. They put it in lost and found, but assume it's stolen. Oh, you found it? I didn't. Sydney did. Was she mad? She was more mad at my inability to track it down. She's like, I just went up to Big Reno. We watched the security cameras, find out where it got, you know, who took it. And he's like, oh, that's one of the people that work here. They took it, like,
She's still new to the game knowing you, Mike. Right. And I was just like, so I definitely... Honestly, I... I felt bad. I felt so bad. Dude, you shouldn't because that was her problem of trusting you.
Like, we were just having this conversation. Like, she'll figure this out. Like, she shouldn't expect that of you. To be fair, if I had something valuable, I wouldn't be like, give it to Mike. That's accurate. He's going to keep good track of it. Right now, he's all drunk. Like, give it to him. He will keep it safe. No, that is accurate. So, like, the realistic thing, maybe she shouldn't have trusted me with it. I'm sure she won't do it again. I'm trying to be like, I need to act as if that was my own, as if that was my wallet. Who are you?
What are you saying right now, Mike? I need... You're saying things that I've never heard you... Keep track of things? Are you taking responsibility? Yes. What the fuck? Take responsibility. Yeah, I was so bummed. It's like, she canceled her card. I bet she was pissed. She was mad. Oh, I bet. She's gotta order all new cards. Well, just one, luckily. But it was like, I'm putting it on hold, sort of stolen card thing. But then the guy, she's on the phone, he's like, no, you canceled it. Which, I mean, I don't think she knew, but...
God, dude, that sounds like a nightmare. Nightmare? Ken, can we hear it one more time? Nope. Nightmare. It's actually pretty funny because I was like, did CJ say nightmare or did Ken? Oh, that is totally a CJ thing to say. Hey, Mike. I do say a lot of words wrong, I know. Were you on the boat when Ken's nuts fell out? I was. Was it a spectacle? I didn't see him. It's like, where were you when Ken's nuts fell out of the source?
Dude, we went on and on and on and on about that, but when Evan said they were like two clementines in a bag, that was it. That was when I lost it. Just laughing, dude. Yeah, like those little bags of oranges. There's like two, like as if you set the bag of clementines down, but they were all like misted with water. It was like two sweat stains. I can't remember.
You were lying. They were as a sweat stain. I didn't see it. Alex had to get the bleach out after that. I was like, Ken's a clean guy. It's fine. I think as far as I know and as far as any guy knows, a big sack is a good problem to have. We were just saying that. Like a bowl.
Yeah. Something you just wish you had, but. Right. You don't know the burden that it is lugging these two giant watermelons around everywhere. Is it actually something you wish you had? Because I don't wish I had big balls, but if you had big balls, you got to embrace. Why are we still talking about this? Ken, put them on the table. Put them on the table.
They thud. The table cracks. How has this come up this many times in this conversation? Has it? I haven't been here. This is the last thing I'm going to say on it. Why do you not like talking about it? Because why? Why do you keep bringing it up? It's an awesome thing. It's just like, yeah, CJ, let's talk about your nuts for 25 minutes. Can we? It's the most awkward thing for me. Can we? Can we?
I wish I had a nuts story. If CJ had nuts to talk about for 45 minutes. It'd be awkward, okay? It'd be a full episode. That's fair. We just title it CJ's Nuts. We get slightly off topic. Come on, guys. Let's get back to my nuts. I guess we do talk about Ben's nuts all the time. This side of the table, yeah. Think of how many times we talk about your nuts on this podcast. Probably five. Three, four, five, yeah. I think I still got you beat, Ken.
Yeah, you got to get those numbers up. He's happy about that. He's like, seriously, this should be the first and the last. No more nut talk. Ken, you should get a nut job. Reduction. Dude, TLC catches wind of this and they do a full episode of like my 400 pound nuts. It's just like the South Park episode. They have a wheelbarrow. Ken, what?
Will Barron is nuts right now. His nuts have become so big he has had to wear a hoodie upside down to just obtain them. Obtain. Obtain. Obtain. I don't know.
But I have a nut story about Ken. Okay. A nut story? All right. Hold up, Ryan. I'll hop out. If there is a time for it, it is right now. If I'm going to tell it, I might as well put it on the podcast. So we might as well exploit Ken's nuts. So Ken's nuts are like a solar eclipse. They only come out every so often. And so my sophomore year of college, it was New Year's Eve.
We were all just hammered. I believe Ken had passed out. And I think we were just being assholes, drunk assholes. And we ripped the sheets off and Ken was wearing boxers. And that was poking out. And I had it on Snapchat. And so I have this video of me on Snapchat. We pull it off. They go, Ken's nuts. Ken's nuts. And they're just plooped out of your underwear. They were plooped.
Dude, Ken, you got good nuts. Good for you, buddy. Thank you. And people talk about them. Yeah, people have been talking about your nuts. Not just us. Other people, too. Yeah. That's the way to respond, Ken. It is funny. I just want to say, like, you guys probably see me and Mike walk around naked all the time.
But you guys don't. And why is that? Why am I not naked? Yeah, why do you guys walk around naked more often? Do you think I like you walking around naked? It's fucking weird. But why? I don't know. It's just weird. Like, I've seen, not in like a gay way, not that there's anything wrong with being gay, but I've seen Mike's dick many times. And you guys have all probably seen my dick many times, but I've never seen any of your guys' dicks. You are a bit of an exhibitionist, dude.
You're like running around in the hot tub. There's levels to it. There's like, there's strictly, there's someone, there's someone who doesn't want to ever be seen naked ever. And then there's someone like CJ. Like, I mean, I'm not saying he's a cute. Literally just struts around from the bathroom to the hot tub. I just don't, I mean, it's just the boys, man. I wouldn't do it in front of your girl. Thank you for that. But,
Ryan might. Ryan might. But I just remember, like, my favorite thing is if you're showering, CJ will just completely, you know, when you're showering. Walk down the bathroom. No, he just disregards the fact that you're showering. And I don't find a problem with it, but I do, like, find myself. I'm not looking at you. No, I find myself, like, talking about it or thinking about it. Like, I'll be showering, and you're, like, in and out of the bathroom four times, let's say. I'm like, okay.
How about once? How about once? Just once. You know, come in, grab whatever, like do what you got to do. And he's like, oh, sorry again. And then you end up just hanging out. And then CJ hops in there with him. I've never done that. You go into the bathroom and you have that thing locked down. Like you lock the bedroom door, you lock the bathroom door. Well, I don't trust you guys. You might fuck with me. Oh, we did talk about that. You always like close Evan's door.
I don't know why. To be honest, I don't know why. I always close Evan's door when I'm in there. No. Evan's laying in bed. I'm talking about the bar door. People are coming and going. CJ always closes Evan's bedroom door and the bathroom door, and I just don't know what goes on in there. There is something about just the lack of trust all of us have around here of just not knowing what everyone's intentions are next. Like, all right, who's the next victim of getting fucked with? I think... And you're all vulnerable taking a shower, and you're just worried about them. Like, whatever.
What's going to go on next? Back to why I guess I don't think it's weird is because just growing up playing sports, you always had to, like, shower in the locker room. And, like, I don't know. It's like you don't – I'm not looking at your guys' dicks or whatever. I don't know. I'm just –
I just don't see why it's weird. I don't, yeah, I don't know. Back in the day when you go to the gym, you used to shower in like the public showers. Now they have like little dividers. Right. Which is fine. I don't care, but. Basically, if the CJ walks in. Oh, geez. What about the boy talk? Divider? Well, we can't shower together. Ha, ha, ha.
There's just one guy in there. I just noticed. There's a bunch of showers. He's like, whoa, what are you doing? There's only one shower. Nice, you already warmed it up for me. I come with it down the...
It's so funny. I don't even know you, man. If you don't look at it in a weird way, like, I mean, that would be weird. But, like, if you don't look at it in a weird way, it's not that weird. It's not, dude. If you look at it as in, like, getting naked is not that weird. It's not. If you're just like, okay, Ben got naked. Cool. But if you look at it weird, then it gets weird. Then it gets really weird. That was such a spectacle. Ken's nuts. Everyone and their brothers are going to be coming up. Oh, fuck.
Just waiting for it. And see, like, that's why Ken doesn't get naked. If it was this giant spectacle. He's going to sell it if he's going to do it. You make it this giant spectacle. We're hyping this up. I think Ken's going to have, like, he's going to be a main event at, like, a strip club. Yeah, like, that would be hard for me not to be excited. What if we did that for, like, a video? We, like, get Ken ready to, like, go put on a show at a strip club. Dude, the ladies would go nuts. Moms love you, Ken.
Penn's a main event. It's like us warming them up. I think I'm going to have to break out the note again.
I've been good about saying yes lately, but. Ken dancing around up on stage. I thought you were going somewhere else with that. You're like, I think I'm going to have to break out the Speedo for this. Yo. All right. Super off topic. Total change of events here. But I was having a conversation. I think it's fine, honestly, that you just did that. Okay. Ken is like, thank God. I somehow wrapped it back to Ken's nuts.
Okay, anyway. All right, so the other day I was having a conversation with Justin, and he was talking about this guy that has been struck by lightning seven times. Because we were like...
I think we were driving in a storm, and I was like, man, this would be so sketchy. Couldn't we get struck by lightning? He was like, no, it's super uncommon. Besides for the one guy that got struck seven times in his lifetime. Is he that unlucky, or is he just trying to get struck by lightning? How does that happen, actually? Break that down. How does that happen? So the guy worked for a national park. He was a park ranger, so he was constantly out. And then the park that he worked in,
It wasn't like Yosemite, but it was like somewhere in California or something like that. But it's like the most struck place in the country. So you put yourself in a bad position. Bad things are going to happen. I get struck by lightning. The dude gets struck by lightning seven times. I got a couple notes on it. Wait, is he good? Yeah. I feel like that's a lot of...
Like, I've been, like, zapped by, like, a, you know, and then I'm like, ow, I didn't like that. Yeah, I've heard of people getting struck once, and they're just, like, fucked. Well, they're either fucked or they're, like, just kind of, like, scared. Like, I don't want that now. Imagine you come home from work to your wife. How was work, honey? I got struck by lightning again. That's the third time this week. Jesus, honey, you just did last year.
I think when you get struck once, you're more susceptible to it. I don't think that's true. I don't think that's true at all, but people say that. I don't know how that works at all, but it's like you're more grounded. I don't think that's true. I don't know. I think that's a bunch of... It could be, though. Okay, so get this, then. So the dude dies not from being struck by lightning, but he gets struck seven times.
His tombstone gets struck three more times. No way. No way. That's what people are saying. Are they lying? Yeah, I was like, wow, that is actually crazy. I mean, there's something electric about that guy. He's got it. Whatever it is, he's got it. That guy's got it. Electric love.
That was nice. I think after the third one, Buddy was getting pretty conditioned to them. Dude, talk about the guy's trust issues. I'm saying, like, after he got struck, like, after the second one even, he was probably like, ah, it's not so bad. I bet people listening right now, somebody listening has been struck by lightning, like a family friend or relative or something, right? Leave a comment down below. What happens? Yeah.
Mostly if they're okay. I just want to know if someone that you know has been struck by lightning. So I was doing some thinking the other day. Nice. As I do, I really get deep. Sometimes I think. Do you think snapping turtles were always mean? Or do you think they were just ugly and no one helped them across the road ever? You know, painted turtles, everyone's like, oh, no. And they get all excited. You see a snapper, you're like, fuck that thing. That is prehistoric. Kill it.
Do you think snappers were just ugly and no one helped it, and then they got mean because no one helped them? I think it's genetic. And then they just started snapping everybody? I heard you talking about this before, and you're like, snapping turtles get a horrible bad rap. Yeah, they got a bad rap. No, I think snapping turtles aren't mean. They're just protective animals.
Like, I don't think they're, like, grumpy. They look like they're grumpy. Well, that's just their appearance. Yeah, they got RBFs, dude. And then they bite you. You pick up another little painted turtle, you kiss it. I think a painted turtle probably would try and bite you. They just don't have the same, like, jaw, and they're not as big. But I think a painted turtle probably would try and bite you. What about a sea turtle? Well...
Big dudes are just cruising around hundreds of years chilling. Yeah, I don't know. What's up with snapping turtles? Why are they little bitches? That's a good question. Sometimes they're big bitches. That's what I mean. There was more thought in this than you guys thought. A lot of... I think it's just genetic. I personally... It's like besides the fact that they can bite your fingers and toes off, I love snapping turtles. I think they're badass, honestly. They're the badass turtles. Oh, like they ride Harleys and... Yep. Leather and stuff. Yeah. That's the criteria to be a badass. Yeah.
No, I think they're like the badass. You got assless chaps. People kind of stay away from them because they're like, well, I'm not messing with those. It's like maybe a good rap for that, but. You also want to keep all your fingers and toes intact usually around them. Dude, I find myself, I don't mess with them, but I like can't just walk by one without being, I can't just go, oh, a snapping turtle. I think that's like a serial killer trait. That's what I mean. They're always getting fucked with.
They tell stories about how their uncle snapping turtles. Like, yeah, there's one kid put a sticker on me and was poking me with a stick. They go, Mike, put a sticker on it. They just tell each other through their little turtle communications. Humans are assholes. And they get bit. That's got to be the worst part. They just get messed with because they have a bad rep. They get messed with and sometimes killed for no reason.
That's what I'm saying, dude. People are racist against snapping turtles. Exactly. For what? Because they're different. Because they're mean. But maybe they're mean because they're different and because people are already mean to them. That's what I'm saying, dude. What came first, the snap or the turtle? You know, Ryan, I don't know, man. See, I told you there was, I don't know. I think there is something more to it. I don't know. I guess I just don't really have like,
I'm going to be honest. I got nothing for you, bro. Next time we find a snapping turtle in a video, because it's pretty common to see snapping turtles around here, we should do something for it, something nice. Funny. You know, like the opposite of most of the time when people see a snapping turtle, especially when they have a camera, they seem to...
Fuck with it. But we should do something nice for it. Throw a birthday party or something. Yeah, get some lettuce or whatever. I don't know what they eat, to be honest. Dude, what if we did that and then it was like... Yo. Kind of a movement. Yeah, people aren't that bad. It just stops snapping. That's what I'm saying, dude. We changed...
Snapping turtle. It brings its entire family out to meet us. Yeah. And then eventually, in 50 years. It buys us something nice, surprises us with something. That'd be nice. Brings us forward. Brings us like a plastic bottle or something. Yeah. That's like a nice gesture in there. Exactly. And then eventually, in like 50, 60 years, they'll start a whole movement and we'll take the snapping turtle name out and we'll call it like a smiling turtle or something, you know? Something nice. We'll just call it a...
Quick turtle. Because those things are quick. They are quick. Bro, people listening right now are like, what the fuck are they on? Just be like, all right, time to turn it off. Do you guys believe in dinosaurs? Because I did up until, I mean, I'm not saying I don't. Are dinosaurs a belief system? Right. So we're watching. Hold up. Do people not believe in dinosaurs? We're watching the new Jurassic Park and Sydney goes, you know that like believing in dinosaurs is a conspiracy, right?
Right? And I was like, I never thought about it that way. You know, you're taught about dinosaurs and all this. And I'm like, I actually never thought about it this way. But there's like fossils and shit. The fossils is what like gives it away. But it is. It's like there's only this historical artifact. It's like, do you believe?
in cars right no these are the same people that think the earth is flat right but the fossils definitely give it away but other than that no one has seen a real dinosaur because there wasn't cameras back because there wasn't people it's like everything just brick the cameras there wasn't people like no one has seen a real dinosaur you know what's wild too
Not to get off topic, but like how certain stories just don't go like generation to generation. Like why isn't there a story in my family bloodline from the 1500s? It's true. You just don't hear stories besides for Ryan being a descendant of Walt Disney. Because maybe they were buddies and it was also Kansas City. Sorry, I said fucking South Dakota. Maybe there's not something monumental enough, I guess.
There had to have been one thing in their lifetime that was like something and then that gets passed on like generation to generation. Because you don't ever listen to your grandpa's war stories. He just starts talking and you go, oh, grandpa's. He's just talking about his war stories. I know, but that's what I mean because he probably forgot. And then you listen to him and you go, oh, I don't care about what the fuck he did. And then you never tell your kids about how...
Right. I think that's kind of like how it is. As sad as that is or how that sounds, it's like they tell you something and you're like, oh, yeah. And you kind of have it in your memory. Oh, yeah, grandpa did this. But it's like not something you're just stoked to tell your kids. You just forget about it over time. Unless there's an epic story and it's different. But I like the way you looked at that. Like it would be sweet to know about even what your 10 generations back story
Great, great, great, great, great, great grandparents even did. Yeah. I think we're starting to change. That kind of thing is going to change now that video cameras are mass produced. They're everywhere. Right. As long as you can still have that file format in the future...
That is something that can, like, preserve stuff from today, whereas, like, 50 years ago, something can happen and you can just disappear it. Maybe, yeah. Disappear it. Disappear it. Also, it is funny, like, the way you said that, like, if the file format's still compatible, like, can you imagine just MP4? Well, that's like fucking CD. Well, can you imagine if somebody just went on YouTube and just went, yo, let's just clear all this shit. Let's just...
Gone. Wipe it. Let's just take a magnet to the server. Dude. Well, fellas. What a pod. Ken's balls and all. It's been real. Bit of a random one. You know, like, it was funny, though. The only thing that made sense to me was Ken's balls. If you guys go to the grocery store, make sure to check out the Clementine aisle. Send in a picture to Ken about it. Take Ken. I could talk about it for all day, man. Thanks. All right.
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