cover of episode 58 - Incomprehensible Laughter Part 2 ft. Brandon Herrera

58 - Incomprehensible Laughter Part 2 ft. Brandon Herrera

Publish Date: 2022/6/15
logo of podcast Unsubscribe Podcast

Unsubscribe Podcast

Chapters

Shownotes Transcript

They're good. The pinkies. Oh, I got here. Uh,

We're going old school today. We got pickled pear, which is also fantastic. We got ranch water. I know you guys like when we all say that. Watermelon. Did you say ranch water? Yeah, we still never got a sponsor from any ranch water company. No, they just said it was a company. What is this? Forty Packs. We drink those in the week. Stoli Elite. Are we just doing a shot? Sure. Yeah, it's Latvian vodka, I believe. I believe it's Latvian. They don't sponsor us. How many shots do we got? Well, I got three shot glasses in here, so we're going to have to make a do. Wait, we can't. What? Where's the other one? Check in the middle.

Right there. Batty, not getting up. Out of all the people, you need to be the one that gets up. I know, I'm close to him too. I just want to see you struggle for a minute. I don't like that things are easy for you sometimes. Hi everyone, we're back at Batty's sauna again. I've said, let's get a goddamn studio. Just any place, I agree. We're getting a studio. I'm getting it now. I'm talking to a realtor.

After we get off this podcast about getting us a studio after you get a little drunky everyone's asking how I'm losing so much weight I just sweat it out Turn my AC on and sweat Okay, oh, let me just make sure Eli's plug in dead spacing Blah blah blah blah blah blah blah fucking hate it here. Thanks to say hi to Eli

It's racially ambiguous, Patty. That guy's fucking ridiculous, don't it? It's harder to rhyme, but he's a really nice guy. Welcome to Unsubscribe. Hey guys, thanks for watching the Unsubscribe podcast. Make sure wherever you're listening or watching, whether it's on YouTube, Castro, Spotify, Apple, Google, Amazon, Podbean, Stitcher, or...

That's all of them. Please leave a comment, like it, thumbs up it, give it a rating of five stars, whatever you do. It helps the podcast out immensely. And Donut and Eli will be very happy if you do that. And we want to make Donut and Eli happy today. Yeah. Five stars on everything and a comment if there is possible because we need to be at the top. Donut, say something motivating.

And that's where the you come that is come subscribe because you do it on steel. Oh Yeah, I could do it with these don't do it. My god. This is nice I thought I was gonna pop top. Why would it be stop? Because usually the the nice stuff has the little corks quality I'm not a huge fan of vodka and he's fucking rolling for it. Oh god, that hurts my ears. Oh

Y'all make fun of me for popping a bottle of my look at his face. That's what's more disturbing sound. I like I like the face That's the determination And then that one so if you're wondering what Cody's real-life superpower is that was that's he's white trash Uncle daddy told sister mommy not to do that anymore sister daddy

Does it taste better once you've popped the top? Yeah, good. Now a little bit of blood Yeah, the iron is really delicious. I know we already talked about it when we're just open I will never that was my that's how I met rich. He's like I can do that Bleeding everywhere. He was bleeding good. Yeah, he needed like two stitches in there. I didn't know about that one I've never heard the weekend or the week you were supposed to hang out with us and you didn't Hey on better news. I went to Donuts house at like 10:00 at night. I

Oh, you actually went? Eli left his house. You went somewhere. He didn't go to Matt's. He came to my house. It was really cool. It was really cool? Did you need something? I'm the one friend that can go to somebody's house. Bro, it was so cool. I hate going places so much. When Eli shows up, it's something special. I remember you talking to me. You're like, I don't think the girls know how long it takes to drive anywhere.

We're gonna get there at 11:00. Yes, pretty late. And then we- I got home at like 2:00 in the morning. I was like, "Yeah, call that time." I was like, "That's about right." Oh wait, do we do the thing first? Don't- God, it is hot as shit in here already. You know what's crazy? When we walked in, everyone's like, "Ah, it feels kinda nice." We walk into this room, it's like, "Is it just this room? You walk through that fucking-" And the kitchen's pretty bad too, actually. And we got four warm bodies here now all huddled together for warmth. Thank God. Good push.

Do you want to do a shot first or do we do a pop it first? Do we? Now I can't even remember. Wait, do we do it? We gotta crack it first so we can... Do we do that first? Drink. Okay. No, but... And then we do the, hey everyone, Cody here.

Fat dick Cody That's her nickname for me, okay, sorry, so why do we call Heather fat dick? We just call her fat dick Cheers we gotta talk about scar tits. Oh yeah, what are scar tits? That was good definitely smooth smooth vodka it's

hard to come by sometimes i mean i still hate vodka rubbing alcohol flavor yeah hi everyone unsubscribe podcast here we're joined today by baddie streams eli double fap and the beautiful brandon herrera

who just at the last minute was like, yeah, I'll be on your podcast. We have, uh, he lives next door to me. Yeah, that's true too. We have no idea what we're talking about today as always. So I hope you enjoy. Pretty sure I could walk home if I needed to. Yeah, no, you could. It sucks. There's a hill, but there's a few hills. We live in Texas. Oh, yeah.

I hate that meme is so broad. So like the, the, the checkout lady was taking her time and I had fucking ice cream on it. Oh, I fucking hate that. Yeah. The podcasters were free. Talk about nothing. Let's throw that up there. Yeah. Right here. Go.

Uh, no, we had a good week. Fucking, we shot a bunch of shit. I flew a fucking jet. That's cool. Heather burned her titties. Yeah, ooh. Good old scar tits now. Is it bad? It's pretty bad. It's second degree burn. It looks like two Crispys faces now. Yeah. She's just like Crispy. Could you imagine? It's the Scarface tits. Got a cicatriz.

So yeah, we were doing the 4th of July shoot for Black Rifle. We were doing their ad and we had like tons of machine guns and I had a grenade launcher and we had a mounted gun and there was just one shot where we're all shooting into the berm. And as we were doing that shot, yeah, Bernie. Into Bernie. The next county. The berm felons, whatever. Yeah.

Bro, we're doing that shot. Just shoot the burr. Shoot at the burr. And the trees are getting... I'm like, oh, that's a lot of leaves falling. So you know you shoot at the burr. You know what I'm not seeing a lot of is dirt in back. And judging from the trajectory of that barrel, Bernie is very upset right now. The way out of the ranch, you just see ambulances going by. Yeah, so...

It was Caleb was to the left of Heather and he had the Tavor and she was like, I'm going to,

I'm going to blade my body this way more so it doesn't go into my tits, the brass. And one went over her shoulder and perfectly went in between her tits that were pressed together because she was holding her gun. And it sat there for like three seconds. And she has two like identical, symmetrical bullet burn marks from a fucking shell casing. At least they're symmetrical. It looks honestly, it looks cool. It's like a necklace. Yeah. She makes a V when she pushes it. She's like a Care Bearer.

I don't think Care Bears push their tits together. Eli. You downloaded the wrong torrent, my friend. I'm not one to judge. Like Bronies do the My Little Pony thing. What are Care Bear weirdos?

Inject OC cause

Donut doesn't have to say, he just has to think it, which is even worse. We're hanging out at that convention, we look back, Donut's floating. We're like, Donut, get down. Stop it. Stop thinking those things. Or just something like, some racial stereotype happens in front of him, he just starts levitating. He's like, aw.

No. Dad not here. *laughter* *more laughter* Cuddy. He tried to steal my shoes! *laughter*

Man, I'd love some KFC right now. Jesus. Today's the day. Today's the day. This is the one, boys. You always say that when I come on. It's when you're not here, too, though. That's not you, it's me. Like, Cody's not here. Are we going to make it? No, Eli doubles down. We're still getting canceled. We got to do it. I did fly a jet. It was fucking... What kind of jet?

You don't know, do you? 39. LP39? L39? Why are you looking at us like we know what we are? Yeah, one of those. I don't fat electrician instantly was like that. And I was like, of course he knows. You could have just said a fast one. It was a Russian one. Oh, really? Yeah. Like a mini? We got fucking Tom Cruise's body double at the table right now. Some bullshit.

It's like one of the BRCC friends, right? Yeah. Wiz owns one. His name's Wiz? It's his, like, Maverick. It's his call sign. Yeah, it's his handle. So his name is Wiz. I don't think that's where it came from. He's like, I want to be named after piss. Fucking dope. Call me fart. I don't think that's how the combo. I mean, Bob...

Bob, you could have went with that. And literally five minutes before getting into it, they gave me a brief on like, don't touch this, don't touch this one, and everything else is good. Just make sure the red things do not do that.

don't do that. I was like, dope. That's fucking easy. Sat down. Okay. We'll go over a quick, uh, safety briefing. I was like, Joe been through a plenty of these sat down. He's like, okay, I'm going to show you the maneuver and then you're going to do it. So I'll show you how to do a barrel. And then you're going to do the barrel. I'm going to show you how to do a loop and you're going to do the loop. I'm going to show you how to spin it. And you're going to spin. I was like, what? I'm flat.

I'm flying the goddamn thing? He's like, yeah, you're just throttle thing. You good, right? You've done anything? You played Call of Duty Battlefield? Sir, if you could walk me through that again, my time in the military trained me how not to listen to safety brief. Now I'm immediately regretting that decision. I zoned out for a hard three minutes there. Until you said you're doing a flip. And I was like, huh? Like, my nerve, it was like resting heart rate. You're doing this elevated heart rate. I was like, ah, okay.

Sweat. And I'm still the guy that's not going to be like, no, I'm not going to do that. You just hit the ejector seat button immediately. Well, it's the safety briefing. It's like, hey, if we fucking hit some birds and I take a bird to the face, I probably won't be able to talk. You'll have to take over. Landing won't be that hard. I was like,

I don't know there was some country and I thought actually I don't know it's just fucking ejected here it was my

- Close my eyes and hope for the best. - Coincidentally, a fighter jet just hit the Alamo, so... - Could you imagine parking a jet in the Alamo? - Well, you wouldn't park it. - And it's a Mexican that does it.

We would invade Mexico finally that we might invade Russia actually Russian jet crashes into the Alamo with Mexican

It's the weirdest story ever. Semantics. I wouldn't have told anyone. I would have just walked home. I never flew a jet that day. They would have told you. It's just slowly coming down in a parachute. On a seat, too. I would have told them. It has a full seat. You still have the goddamn helmet on? Yes.

Sir, was that you? No, because that helmet's serialized with that aircraft. No, I'm blowing this. It was fucking amazing. Like, just the takeoff, and then they go up. He's like, hey, when we hit 10,000 feet, fucking have at it. And I'm like, have at what? I'm like, man, this stick. He's like, feel the controls, because it is like a little race car. I was like, okay, slight turn. And he was like, whoop, whoop, like.

He's like, okay, tilt it hard to the left. And I was like, and I just hammered. It's like, you just do a complete roll real quick. And I was like, yo, this is fucking dope. Other way. I was like, the fuck? He's like, okay, barrel. We'll do this. Shows it. Pitch nose, 45 degrees. You're like, huh? And he's like, and then a slow rotation. Huh?

A sword fell. Fine. At least it didn't fall on Brandon. Stop resisting! Cody, stop floating! You're not helping our case! That's all his arrest. He's floating the entire time. Cody, you can't be the worst police officer ever. We're up in Alabama, guys. I can't help it.

You're in a self-defense situation immediately everybody just like fucking chains Cody to the ground like No Not again picture in courtroom you're floating Like fucking Superman where you're chained to the fucking cannonballs or whatever is there walking you into court?

But a loop bro bro doing a loop is the most like barrels cool Surfing the clouds fucking gangster cuz you're flying through the clouds Loops, you're just like hammer it get speed you tilt down then you pull back as hard and G's are fucking real you'd get the tunnel vision dude your vision actually goes like And that means all the blood that we were talking about that blood leaves your head. So I was like tighten but short breath was like

Go up. And then when you upside down, you kill the throttle and you just fucking fall. And then you're looking upside down. You're like, oh, this is fucking dope.

Boom. Thrusters back on. I don't want to go on a jet, man. You go skydiving? You go on jets? I'm jerking off alone. This is bullshit. I don't even have any friends to jerk off with. What the fuck? Dude, I live down the road. No, dude, but when you explained that to me the first time, it made perfect sense. But about, like...

With the tunnel vision is because the blood is leaving your fucking head. Like that's sketch. That's fucking scary. And they, the fucking whiz will say, he's like, Oh yeah. If I'm doing like dog, can we call him something else? The pisser said the pisser when the pisser was talking about it, we, he did dog fight maneuvers, which are fucking. That's when the G's come in. I was like, I was like, Oh my God, breathe heavy.

I was like, not big, deep breaths. He's like, God, no, don't do those. I picture I'd be like. Head slams down on the emergency jack.

But... Boom, Alamo. He's saying, like, with the F-22s or the F-18s, they'll pilot them at the verge of blackout where they can't see. He's like, yeah, it's audible at that time if I'm dogfighter practicing. I know I'm here. Everything's, like, blurred out, like, blacked out, and I can't see, but I know which way I'm going based off of sound in the pool. He's like, that's how you... I imagine the sound is... I know!

I was like, what the fuck? Apparently JT went in one of them.

And he made JT took controls. He's like, and he plummeted and he blacked out. And he's like, JT was like, I just woke up and we were going straight was driving. And he was like, what happened? He was like, are you passed out? Like a minute ago? I was like, man, you're gone for a full minute. So the jet would have like, I don't pull up any moment now. Wow. He's doing some complicated maneuvers. I just think it's like a drive explosion part of the show.

I was like holy shit. It is the weirdest feeling but if you do negative G's the blood goes to your head It feels like your eyes are gonna pop out. So what are those like synergies where you just get like a rock hard motor? That'd be down. Negative G's or positive because then it's all the blood's like wait

If you're going down, you got major, you got a lot of blood leaving your head. If you were hard. Your dick pops. There's only one way to find out. I need to get a boner and a jet, Eli. Can we make this happen? I only live once. We're all just slamming Viagra before we go on a jet. Like, I have to know. It gets in front of the control. Does Heather have the boner pills still? We need them. You've got the cock tourniquet.

It's just nothing but pressure and you're yelling. You're like, "IT HURTS!" "NO, PULL UP!" "IT'S GONNA EXPLODE!" It's just a shoelace. "IT'S SO CLOSE, KEEP GOING!" "Don't let it in like this, Murph." Interstellar's fucking popping off. Your cloth's turning purple. "The colors are flying by!"

You're just having visuals of fucking old sex beat-ups. It's like the fucking Willy Wonka tunnel with all the shit flying. If you want to view paradise. Oh my fucking god. I can hear the song in my head of that scene with everything. No! No! No!

And that's how we get struck. *laughter* *more laughter* *more laughter* *more laughter* *more laughter* *more laughter* *more laughter* *more laughter* *more laughter* *more laughter* *more laughter* *more laughter* *more laughter* *more laughter* *more laughter* *more laughter* *more laughter* *more laughter* *more laughter* *more laughter* *more laughter* *more laughter* *more laughter* *more laughter* *more laughter* *more laughter* *more laughter* *more laughter* *more laughter* *more laughter* *more laughter* *more laughter* *more laughter* *more laughter* *more laughter* *more laughter* *more laughter* *more laughter* *more laughter* *more laughter* *more laughter* *more laughter* *more laughter* *more laughter* *more laughter* *more laughter* *more laughter* *more laughter* *more laughter* *more laughter* *more laughter* *more laughter* *more laughter* *more laughter* *more laughter* *more laughter* *more laughter* *more laughter* *more laughter* *more laughter* *more laughter* *more laughter* *more laughter* *more laughter* *more laughter* *more laughter* *more laughter* *more laughter* *more laughter* *more laughter* *more laughter* *more laughter* *more laughter* *more laughter* *more laughter* *more laughter* *more laughter* *more laughter* *more laughter* *more laughter* *more laughter* *more laughter* *more laughter* *more laughter* *more laughter* *more laughter* *more laughter* *more laughter* *more laughter* *more laughter* *more laughter* *more laughter* *more laughter* *more laughter* *more laughter* *more laughter* *more laughter* *more laughter* *more laughter* *more laughter* *more laughter* *more laughter* *more laughter* *more laughter* *more laughter* *more laughter* *more laughter* *more laughter* *more laughter* *more laughter* *

It was a good time. It was a fucking dope ass time. I was like, you know what? Check that off the old bucket list. I've done a lot. I live a dope fucking life. Everyone lives dope ass lives. I'm like, yeah, we've done some cool shit. Don't get the fly fighter jet. Or jumped out of an airplane.

Wait, does the fighter jet guy live here? Yeah, he's coming back. We're figuring that off schedule for you guys to go and do that shit. Let me jerk off in the airplane. I hope Patty has a stroke. Honestly, yeah, me too. What if it fixes your equilibrium? It's like the National Lampoon. Yep, got kicked by a horse, made her cross-eyed, fell down a well, came right back. Patty gets out of the plane, he's like, guys, I'm fixed.

It just has an aneurysm. Oh, that blood. It unlodged it. I mean, honestly, I've had a great life. This has been bonus time, boys. My brother in Christ embraced the spicy blood nugget. The forbidden blood nugget. The forbidden blood nugget.

Oh my god. I just fucking doomed myself to die of a blood clot. Called a badulance. Bames nondescending a strong called a bondulance.

What did you just say? Have you not seen that meme? No! It's my favorite. It's like, hi, it's Bond, James Bond. Okay, well, why are you saying your name like that? Name's Bjohn. Are you okay? No, I'm just having a strong call the Bondulence. I have not seen that meme. If you have a stroke and talk like that, I'm going to let you continue your YouTube career. I mean, obviously, he's going to do better after that.

I'm ordering the chalkboard right now. I forgot about the death pool. Oh, yeah, the death pool. Speaking of blood clots. Dude, Demo. Did you see how Demo took an astounding lead in that death race? Oh, yeah. Well, it's because he had the most followers. That's what I said. I feel like I got that shit on lock. I'm dying first. I'm surprised his fans are like, huh? What kind of followers is that? Huh? You're going to die first. I'm a huge fan. It's like...

So I put on Twitter who's going to die first because they were talking about doing the Deadpool. Oh, I wasn't on that either. No, you can only put four polls on Twitter at a time or four little categories. And I put me, Eli, Batty, and Demo Ranch. And there were 18,000 votes in 24 hours. And Demo Ranch got away with 47% of the votes, nearly half. He's like the most noctose one out of all of us. Like he's safe. He's got a family. People love him. Like I don't know.

I don't know. Couldn't be me. Kentucky Blitz has got on here and he commented, well, this is awkward. He's good, dude. He had his fucking freebie. I don't think it's going to happen again. Yeah, that man, he's safe. His life endangering mulligan. Is that what this is?

I don't know if you should roll real quick. Like, what's that? 14.5. You were showing is a good. Yeah. Batty. Oh, my God. That'll do it. The 14.5 sniper rifle. So I haven't I haven't revealed this publicly yet, but it's been so fucking long since I bought it. I haven't got it in yet, so I don't really care anymore. We saw this PTRS 41, the Russian semi-automatic anti-tank rifle, the 14.5 by 114 millimeter.

The big-ass fucking gun. Yeah, I haven't seen... How have I not seen this? I haven't gotten it yet. Oh! I was literally just in your shop. Yeah, no, that's...

That's probably what's going to kill me because apparently those just explode for no reason. Like they always did from Russia. Like that was just a design flaw. Is it a design flaw or were they, we know the guys that didn't want his, but it was designed in like 20 days. Oh my God. Yeah. 20 Kalashnikov described it as 20 sleepless days and nights in his book saying Simon off just basically got told by Stalin. We need an anti-tank rifle. That's semi-automatic.

And so when Stalin says that, you just fucking do it. Yeah, obviously. Yeah, they just blow up. So they just kind of figured like, well, if it blows up one out of every 200 rounds, but the average soldier only lives to fire 30, it's okay. It's very good. That's what's terrifying. Like you showed that video. I was like, and you're like, that's a proper charge, a proper load. And it's just like, I was like, so I'm going to shoot it. I just, I have to.

I'll show you the video then you can ask. I'm still on a shit. I don't give a fuck. I never say this. I stopped caring about my well-being a long time ago, my man. Same. It's terrifying. Put your bets in for the Deadpool now. But no, the... Yeah. If you do everything right, they just blow up. That's terrifying. If you shoot that, you're going to do test fires first. So then it goes from...

One out of 200 to one of 195 and then now I made that number up. Nobody knows. Oh, that's even better Yeah, the more I get shot. It's more of a like ticking time bomb. So we're gonna yeah good It's like five round mag. I think good literally Russian rule. I'll buy five rounds the only

So I can't, you can't find ammo for it. I only was able to acquire like nine rounds and they were Egyptian surplus, 10% download brass projectile. I'm like, man, this is sketchy. Cause I'm shaking these, I'm shaking these rounds and they're not making the same noise. Dude, we got nine friends. One of us, we can speed that dead pull up. Fuck yeah. I'm down. We just all rotate. This is evidence right now for the record. If it blows up and kills one of us, this is so fucking evidence. This will be played in a court of law.

Okay, guys, everyone line up. We're going to pull the trigger until someone doesn't walk home tonight. Brandon knows which one's the heavy load. He's like, yeah, here, baddie. I'm winning that fucking money.

But then we're gonna win the money off the memorial t-shirts we sell a bunker branding as long as one of us three dies like I mean fuck Yeah, like money. I still like the batty t-shirt without baddies face Fucking assholes died - yeah all my friends went died without me ready

Rest in peace, Blake. And then it's a random person's face on the front of his shirt. Bro, bro, bro. It's another redhead. It's still got like the fucking like Getty Images fucking thing over it. Somebody messaged our fucking unsubbed Twitter or Instagram. I don't remember which it was. It's like, Greg, I know you checked these. And he's like, I know it's not your name, but fuck you, Greg. I'm like, what the?

Random attack on baddies successful. Greg, I know you check these. Hey, Greg, fuck you. I love it.

Call me fucking Brandon - in my fucking stream People come to my show like Patty banned me I was like you call him Brandon or Blake what wouldn't named you call Brandon - it's like If I die first you can be branded one honestly, I'm taking your name die, it's like a spider-man Just be Brandon above

Then you can use that old intro again. His name is Brandon. Brandon. Just the most Brandon. Oh, I love it. Oh, Batty, it is time. No, Cody, you do it. No, Brandon, you do it.

Okay. Someone can do it. We'll move the alcohol. Do you want me to do it? There it is. There's the good smell. Hi, everyone. If you're a fan of the unsubscribed podcast, you'll probably be a fan of Out of Regs. It's currently what I'm wearing in my luscious hair as we speak. You can go to outofregs.com, I think. That's regs spelled R-E-G-Z. And you can pick up cool shit like this, like the Green Beret Foundation.

I've never used this but I Don't know this Green Beret foundation shit is that's on I'm not sure about this one yet, but that one's pretty good I like the smooth operator Spicy

The forbidden Play-Doh. The forbidden Play-Doh. Outofbreds.com will ship you C4 if you ask politely. Use... Come 20. Use unsub is the... Dude, come 20 has so...

So many cells. Thank you guys for that. Guys, do you know how many people use come 20 for a goddamn discount? Head over to Adderix.com and use code UNSUB to save 20% on any of your luscious hair needs. Or come 20. The more you use come 20, the better chance we have of buying Batty air conditioning. Yay, Batty's house. The more you come, the cooler Batty will be.

The more you come I want somebody to make that the rainbow. Yeah, the rainbow it's gotta be the same shitty 3d though like

It's just cum trail behind you. Why did you make the same noise? Is that what it sounds like when you cum? You guys have deflating balloons over there? Your dick doesn't sound like that. I'm going to go. What do you guys mean? That's normal, right? Silly, that would be for the first time you hook up with a new chick. I'm going to cum and it's this. It's just me.

It's making a mess everywhere. It's just... Like a wacky, wavy, inflatable arm. Yeah, it looks like an inflatable tube map. It's just...

Like I was way too into sounding so it just *makes weird noises* I just- I picture she just gets up and leaves. She doesn't say a word, doesn't grab her clubs. She just stands up and walks off. Off the balcony. Look at each other, no one knows what to say. "God, why did you make me this way?"

Just like a little quiet *BOOM* *BOOM* *BOOM* *BOOM* *BOOM* *BOOM* *BOOM* *BOOM* *BOOM* *BOOM* *BOOM* *BOOM* *BOOM* *BOOM* *BOOM* *BOOM* *BOOM* *BOOM* *BOOM* *BOOM* *BOOM* *BOOM* *BOOM* *BOOM* *BOOM* *BOOM* *BOOM* *BOOM* *BOOM* *BOOM* *BOOM* *BOOM* *BOOM* *BOOM* *BOOM* *BOOM* *BOOM* *BOOM* *BOOM* *BOOM* *BOOM* *BOOM* *BOOM* *BOOM* *BOOM* *BOOM* *BOOM* *BOOM* *BOOM* *BOOM* *BOOM* *BOOM* *BOOM* *BOOM* *BOOM* *BOOM* *BOOM* *BOOM* *BOOM* *BOOM* *BOOM* *BOOM* *BOOM* *BOOM* *BOOM* *BOOM* *BOOM* *BOOM* *BOOM* *BOOM* *BOOM* *BOOM* *BOOM* *BOOM* *BOOM* *BOOM* *BOOM* *BOOM* *BOOM* *BOOM* *BOOM* *BOOM* *BOOM* *BOOM* *BOOM* *BOOM* *BOOM* *BOOM* *BOOM* *BOOM* *BOOM* *BOOM* *BOOM* *BOOM* *BOOM* *BOOM* *BOOM* *BOOM* *BOOM* *BOOM* *BOOM* *BOOM* *BOOM* *BOOM* *BOOM* *BOOM* *BOOM* *BOOM* *BOOM* *BOOM* *BOOM

Why don't you guys know what you're gonna talk about every episode? 'Cause we don't get to any of the points anyways! We talk about goddamn cum! 90% of the shit! This is only like 30% more exciting than a normal lunch with us, by the way. This is pretty normal. Cheers. This is reserved. That's what I always say. The podcast is reserved to us.

well did we have anything today i don't think we talked about anything i mean we just got those two things and then the rest have been i don't know gaming hasn't been kind of slow man there hasn't been anything cool targa boy's happening probably the next week oh yeah the tarkov update is badass man it smoothed out a lot of stuff oh wait there's that i'll see you guys in july you know how like when you used to walk there was like a little stutter

Now it's completely smooth. They did so many like server updates. Oh no shit. Yeah, John started playing it again. Him and I have been playing it on the new lighthouse expansion dropping new guns. They're adding the actual grade launcher. You were using the black rifle video one of those so fucking badly.

fucking street sweeper but the no street sweepers the 12 i know but the the mgl yeah mgl version of it why don't you have one yet oh you don't have to pump it oh it's just it's just semi-hot you load the spring inside of it you keep spinning it and the spring tightens up so when you shoot it's just like so brandon when are you getting one as soon as i fucking can i'm talking to the company god they happen to it's like an offshoot sister company of another company i was working with so yeah like i need this

I just bought an M203. Oh yeah, you got a fucking... Do you have the M16? No, not yet. We're still doing the form. Are you getting the Grenadier M16 version? I showed you yesterday. I've got like a Vietnam Surplus M16. The triangle fucking... And I've got the new like the Predator Scarface like grenade launching handguard to put on. Oh, yes. So just mount the 203 under that and say hello to my little friend. Do you need a white suit? I have a white suit. Why do you have a white suit? Look at me. Why are you asking that question? Why do you think it's going to fit me?

You've got very broad shoulders. You just called me fat? No, I'm saying you've got broad shoulders. You're a man's man. Also, you're tall. You're taller than I am. He doesn't want to borrow your bed sheet. And you have penis farts. Fuck. Yeah, the penis farts are really off-putting. They leave stains. It started out as a blue jacket.

Here, take my suit. Batty, this is a ghost outfit. Why do you have a ghost outfit? Why are you guys cut out of it, guys? You just have to bleep all of what Cody just said. Guys, Cody's floating again. Those damn floaters. Oh, goddammit. I have a wetsuit. Fuck off. That's my word, okay? It's float-ah to you. I hate it.

Okay Tarkov so there's some good good finally again. I need to play it again. I don't know no so fuck up one day Play one day with us you gotta play one day one day. He was going to how long's this white been it's been six months Usual I think I skipped this I mean you were gone for you blacked out for a minute. I did it

It was like three or four months there. We lost you. I am back. It's okay I just I hate that like the learning curve or just you need to learn I know you guys you know how to play you'll suffer either way. I will I'll get mad at the game or bad It doesn't matter you're gonna fucking die I've been hearing a lot though from like other creators that like just there's nothing to fucking play right now Yeah, yeah, that's why I was playing fortnight no build mode like everybody's been everybody shit themselves over the new fucking Elden ring and

Then after they got bored with that like they just there hasn't gone anything. Yeah, there hasn't been really much What happened the Microsoft conference yesterday two days ago? Well, there's the one game with the what's a big? Starfield knows it. Oh star the new Skyrim the star so they make in a space version writer Starfinder Yeah, it's Skyrim. It's I would never know man sky but like pretty I

Scott City's Skyrim in space. Mm-hmm. It's what that is making it. It's literally no man's sky. That's awesome before Elder Scrolls 6 comes out They're doing Starfinder and it's going to be literally Skyrim meets fucking no man's sky

Out in space, you can go to, like, different planets. That one, I was like, okay, please be fucking dope as shit. Because I love space games. Like, space games are... A lot of different ships. A lot of customizations. You can build the fuck out of your ships. Apparently, the combat mechanics people were, like, shitting on. But it's a fucking bit... It's just kind of like Cyberpunk. Like, Cyberpunk. Like, the combat mechanics for that really did kind of suck. I mean, yeah. Look at Skyrim. Combat mechanics. Ooh.

And you're good you can what those games have never been like insane comic cool They added finishing moves finally so it looks like you're killing something instead of just swinging a sword wildly like must say though VATS did change gaming Oh, that's that was yeah. Yeah. I mean, okay, that's fallout. I'm sorry I said Bethesda. I mean Skyrim or wind Ellis any Elder Scrolls title, but that's it didn't do

That's all out What I said Bethesda, I meant Skyrim Elder Scrolls style no, I totally had blanked on a remake New Vegas Which is crazy is that platform was for the isometric view and originally and I was surprised I was like wait, they're bringing vats into that first-person shooter I was like, how's that gonna work and it worked fucking great because the old isometric one and two it was it

That's why memes are fantastic. Oh my god. JFK.

You're seeing me put that in my shootings. Yeah a couple of my shoes. I remember the the guy that took the prisoner the person the prison guard at the top of the stairs I did a vats and me The cop dude the cop like transitions away from his shotgun and pulls us the slot on one-handed like pop out gets the guy in the head twice While he's holding a hostage that is it not a shot I could have done look can we throw that up here wait wait? We probably shouldn't do that

Let's not put that up there. Show the title, the card, so you can click the link. I'll put the link to the video in the description. Show a VATS dude getting shot in the dome. It's like Prisoner 2 tap or something like that. Is the original video monetized? I think so. Okay, well then... I'll put it in the description. Fuck yeah, we'll fucking... Roll the dice. Put it in the description below to see some dude get double tapped. Manual reviewers, you little scamps, you. Little scamps. Little scamps. Y'all motherfuckers at home don't even know.

Sometimes you get Jessica with her purple hair in California manual reviewing a video, and sometimes you get Bubba in Alabama. A lot of times it's Apu or Wong, whoever, because they outsource this shit. I'm going to hold you down real quick. I'm going to hold him down. All three of you flying.

There's enough to go around. It's like Willy Wonka and you all ate that magical chocolate that floated up to the sky. Or the soda. That's what it was. The burping. Fucking Mr. Beast just released this video. Yeah, the chocolate factory. Yeah, he gave away the chocolate factory. 60 million fucking views in a week.

For him, that's actually kind of underperformed if you look at the other ones. Like he was in the 50s. And he had Gordon Ramsay on there. Did he? I need to watch the entire thing. Because you were telling me Gordon Ramsay just did it because his kids like Mr. Beast or something like that. I think so. I think that's what I heard. That will get you really far if your kids like it. There was another individual that happened. Isn't that how Black Rifle got the ranch?

Oh, yeah, because the kids like, yeah, that was the... For real? Yeah. That's literally how that worked. Huh. We have fans of individuals like, hey, Don, what superhero did that for? It was another superhero thing where it's like Thor or something. One of their kids liked another superhero. He was like, hey, my son, like, huge fan of yours, blah, blah, blah. He's having a party. Well, you don't have to go, but he really likes it.

Thor, whoever. And he dressed up as Thor and came to the kid's birthday party. Just like, what's up? I'm like, oh man. What a dad flex. I know, right? The biggest dad flex. What would mom do for you? Do you want your pony? Thor's here. The Thor. Yeah, the Thor. You're like, fuck my life. I know there's that one with Henry Cavill.

Like he showed up because like his like nephew or whoever got in trouble for lying and saying that his uncle was Superman Oh, he like showed up to his classroom like no, I'm fucking Superman Yeah, yeah the teacher thought yeah the teacher and the kids would always Yes, I forgot about that story yes the kid away they always thought the kid was telling fibs and

And then the teacher was like, he told the parents of Henry Cavill's nephew, he's like, your son keeps lying, saying his uncle's Superman. We can't have him lying. So Big H went to the fucking school. He did one of these. He's about here. He's like, hey, fuck you, kid. So now that kid can no longer be called out for lying on anything. By the way, he's got a great new crypto investment. Oh, shit.

- That crypto in that stock market, am I right? - Yeah, Luna, I think is the one. That's real, that's doing numbers. - Everything is just crushing right now. - Dude, it's so bad right now. - It's gonna get worse. - That way I know. I'm not used to filling up my gas tank and walking out and be like, "Oh, what the fuck? "Why was it $80 to fill my little car up? "That's weird." - It was really upsetting. The gas station next to my house caps you off at 75 bucks.

So, Raptor. That's weird. It caps me off at $150. What's that about, Batty? Does it really? I've never, no matter what card I use, it's never gone over $75 for me. Interesting. The one, right? Yeah. The one where we always get White Claw? They know he doesn't have air conditioning. I'm fucking with you, man. I was like, what? What the fuck, dude? And Batty's like, am I poor? Does it read my card? Does it know I'm poor? It's your bank's limit on that gas bill. It's like, decline. Okay.

but for a raptor it's not even half a day yeah it's it's like 200 plus dollars to fill up the raptors and we we all drive the same exact truck super yeah yeah it's a cult well kids if uh if things look like they're they're looking bad right now just remember that

It's gonna get a lot worse. Yeah, yeah. Fluck that meme up there, by the way. It's gonna get worse. It's gonna get a lot worse. Have you seen that meme? A little with the Russian dude with the gas mask. Like video games?

At least fuck yeah nothing coming out, so that's dope Diablo 4 is coming out Diablo immortal pay to wins coming out People are not liking that. They're saying balls coming out. They're not liking Diablo 4 right now Immortal things about for yeah immortal then yeah, they're saying it costs like 100 $200,000 to get no this character in the game Diablo immortal apparently is going to be really good, but

But they're also adding pay-to-win mechanics so you can just buy yourself to being the best. As a non-paying player, you can get there. It's just like... Which I'm fine with at the end of the day. You should just buy this stuff. They're making it very incentivized to just buy it. At my age now, I'm like, I don't got time to fucking game. I'm like, yo, that's a dope item. Now I am 100%. I just don't give a shit anymore. Eli, what a spicy take.

Dude, 80 hours. I do get it. Oh, 80 hours into this or Eli spends $100. Do you have any idea what our hourly... I do got World of Warcraft. If I jump on, I'm like, I haven't played in a while. God, I don't want to level a character to fucking 60 or 70 or whatever it is now. I'll spend the 30 bucks just to fucking get it to the busiest level. I know where you were going to... I was like, where are you going to pay this level? Well, think about it. What's our hourly rate?

Mine is much lower than all of yours. What's our hourly rate? Very high. Even still, it's way, way, way higher than what a lot of these people should. Ours is probably now $500 to $1,000 an hour would be a rough estimate. Depends on what you're doing. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Like for contract or not contract. Wait, you guys make money? It really does depend though on like what it is. Exactly. The companies, it all matters. I think you're talking about rate ads or something like that. It's like.

Really really fucking high tomorrow Oh, yeah, that's right. I've seen those they seem like a lot

I feel like if people knew what we made on some of this shit, they wouldn't like us anymore. They would not be a happy camper. Especially mobile gaming ads and stuff. What was that mobile game you did the other day? It wasn't Raid, it was some other shit. Which one? I don't fucking know. I do a few. Lord's Mobile or something like that. Do you actually play them? Daddy's got to pay for a PTRS-41. No, fuck no. I don't play any fucking mobile games ever. I'm kidding. If you guys want to sponsor our podcast, we will play your mobile games.

Use hashtag Raid Legends. Raid Art of Comrade. Comrade. Comrade for free. Use hashtag Raid Legends. I don't know. We'll do whatever. With a pitch like that, my God. We probably should get some ads for this podcast. We're doing okay. I can feel that dislike button getting hit right about now. I can feel it. I feel a disturbance in the force.

I called him on it. It's okay. They don't show the numbers anymore. We're good. Dude, we're going to get a play button soon. I know. We're 70K. We hit 70K earlier today. I know. Like this morning. Fucking dope. This is climbing. It's climbing. And then we'll have Ray Chadwick. Watch that left arm there, buddy. It's just clock. He's not white. It's fine. Chill, Cody. Chill.

I was without giving anything Wow. Yeah, okay, so that was the first one the uh, yeah the wiener episode Okay, they do things due to peepee

That was fucking great, dude. There might be just a no spoilers. It's just a fucking spoilers. We're doing silly. Yeah.

Dude, that's, but it's going so, I'm halfway through the last episode. The fourth? Yeah, the fourth one. That show is going so fucking hard and so good. I'm just so happy with that show right now. Dude, I still fucking hate Huey. He's still the biggest pussy in the world. I know. Yeah. And he's got such a good influence. But butch yeah.

but yeah butcher's badass it's different in the comics man but he actually mans up and starts killing things and i know he does it some in the show but it's like he's still kind of a giant moments and then he'll revert back to being like just a total putz yeah it'd be terrifying i was like man like looking homelander in the face you're like this dude could literally just he'd sneeze and i would die yeah and there's nothing you can do and you know he's thinking about it i know

And that actor they got, he's just, this season's doing so good, and like, just the cusp of that line of going crazy. Insanity. He's like, every time he's on screen, you're just like, I'm uncomfortable. We can't even talk about this now, because we want to talk about specific instances. I know, and you're just like... Because you fuckers won't watch the show. And we can't give spoilers, we can't be them. I'm going to give you all...

Three more episodes before we just spoil everything the shows done and like all the episodes are out dog all but oh, yeah Yeah, straight up. You got like a week after the last episode and then I'm I'm full-on just I

We're doing it. Spoilers. I'll go down in the comments myself and spoil it for you. Even if I'm not on the episode. Dude, that was the one spoiler I got. Dude, I am really, I love the Marvel shit a lot. Oh, you got spoiled? I was a big fucking Iron Man fan from day one. He was a fucking weapon nerd. Playboy billionaire. Fucking dope. Like, I always thought that was cool. And like, I was really into it. Endgame. I went, I got tickets that fucking night.

An hour before I went to go see it on my YouTube homepage, it just pops up Iron Man death scene. And the thumbnail was the whole I'm like, this better be fake. Better be fucking. They better be. I was so pissed off. Oh, I was not right. I love you. Do you see like when I'm scrolling through anything? I'm like, oh, what's up? Nope. I like.

Feel bad I was on Twitch when that was happened like live streaming like cuz I didn't see it - like I think the second or third day my poor mods god bless your souls those motherfuckers purds and deleted everything I they all got spoiled every one of my mods were like won't gonna see this now and I was like Let's really like don't look at my chat Play the game. I love you guys. Thanks for everything for yourselves. Oh, I I hate that was upsetting like I Cut does that?

There were people doing that around that time period, just like they did when, like, Snape killed Dumbledore. There was the lines out the door of the movie theaters, and people were driving by in their cars and recording themselves screaming, Snape kills Dumbledore. Han Solo died. Like, that whole thing. Yeah. They were doing that for the book. Yeah, they were doing that for the book. I mean, when the book came out, they were reading, like, the last page. Because I just had that little excerpt. They were just, like, reading the last page of the books and shit. I'm like...

That's hardcore. He's rolling around reading a book at people loudly and angrily. After episode seven came out, I saw people going around. I saw somebody got a vinyl wrap for their car that said like Han Solo dies.

See, this is where I'm glad I'm not on Twitter much. Very rarely. But that's where a lot of people get shit spoiled, was Twitter. That's where I've always heard, like, hey, spoilers. Or Reddit. I won't go on Reddit, and I won't go on fucking Twitter. Reddit's kind of toxic anyway. Reddit is kind of? It's really toxic. My subreddit's okay. What is it? Which one? The one that got banned? My subreddit currently is r slash Brandon Harara, because we lost the first one.

Like, they banned it so hard you can't make any that are named the same. Yes, I'm dead fucking serious. I never started either of them. They just like fucking adapted it without me, but yeah. We have the Reddit for fucking our unsubscribe. Do you? Yeah, there's a unsubscribe Reddit someone started.

I didn't know we had one. Yeah, I commented on one. They're like, this isn't the real Elon. I was like, little do they know. My usernames on a lot of shit are like, not the AK guy. I had read it like fucking 12 years before I started Donut. So my handle on Reddit is Bacon Opinion. Oh, that's a really good name.

Still like food now. Holy shit. Unsubscribe podcast is a joy of food now. It's donut operator bacon opinion. So fucking good. I'm going to post on our subreddit right now. Yeah, be like we're in the middle of an episode. What you fucks up to penis fart. I'm a simple man. I hear a penis fart. He said penis fart. Fuck you guys. Cheers. They added a dick and a poop together.

Don't that I don't that's against the rules of our own subreddit, but I did it I doubt it is they have canopy we're gonna find out wait who's running our subreddit. I don't know a great question I just give me a heavy. It's a small cup. You're fine. Are these all double shots? No, no the shooters are those are just regular shots, buddy. Yeah, that's a full Subreddit in the bio give us your submissions

We'll talk about it. Yeah, no, we're absolutely gonna talk about it. The first post right now in the subreddit is, anybody know where the clip of CNN talking about Batty is? Oh yeah, because was it CNN or was it someone else? It was like a subsidiary of CNN. It was one of CNN's local channels. What was that word again? Huh? Subsidiary. Hey, you got it. There you go. I'm still chewing on the vodka. Ah, yeah.

Dude, actually, movies and stuff have been really on point lately. Yeah, Top Gun, which I fucking love. Shows are really good. I saw it the night after we talked about it, or the next day. I still haven't seen it. I haven't seen it either. Fucking really good. I've heard nothing but good things. Like, literally nothing but good things. Maybe I should watch that or some shit. It's Star Wars episode one.

Did you watch that dude? It is so on point. You're like, watch episode one as in like New Hope. Fat Electrician did that video. So wait to watch that before. You already spoiled it for me because now I'm going to be watching for it. Yeah. But it's really good. There's no spoilers. So Maverick gets his parents burned on Tatooine. Yeah.

It's really fucking good the show's about it so bad. Oh, no, dude That's what I was like so stoked fucking flying jet afterwards was like yeah I just watched that movie last right tell us when we're doing the jet shit before it happens so we can all go watch Top Gun like in the theater together naked on yeah exactly

You know what would be a cool little clip? If you're watching Top Gun on your phone while you're in the jet, that would be dope. That'd be a neat clip. Or would you just... You have another phone recording you're doing, and he's like, what are you doing? He's like, I'm watching a movie, quiet down.

The shot is just all you see is your hand watching that and then you pan up and it's fucking open So badass fucking that boys animes they have some I mean shield hero right now is popping Oh Kenobi have you guys watched? I haven't watched it. Yeah, I've heard one episode. I'm loving it I am too. I haven't seen oh no, I can't have my episode. I'm I'm

I have my issues with it, but I enjoy it. I think it's... I'm enjoying it. When the moments come where it's like, oh, this is fucking neat. It makes up for all the silly shit. Yeah. But at the same point, I'm still of the mind, and I will die on this hill every day of the week. I will take every bit of new Star Wars Disney is pumping out, whether it's good or bad, versus no Star Wars. Yeah.

Do you want to go back to the dark times before we had Star Wars? I know what you're thinking. Quiet down, Cody. I don't know, man. I legitimately think I may have taken no Star Wars over episodes 7, 8, and 9. I thought the stories sucked, but they're visually fucking beautiful. I agree with that. I'm okay with that. I'm okay with a cinematic experience. I like Rogue One. Rogue One is the best Star Wars movie. All right. That's hard. Tell me.

Tell me where it was about. I don't think it is. They really kill the and everyone at the end. Yeah Yeah, that one scene is the best scene in stars. You know the story behind that right? Yes, they weren't gonna include it and then there went back like this isn't quite complete They're like what if we made Darth Vader off the horror villain and now I need to watch No, we're all going I have yeah Oh when that when he fucking shows up, yeah, that is the best way to introduce Vader to

Fucking of all time like homeboy just comes in there like We just read well people screaming so you know is amazing the original you know how they they were slow on fighting So George Lucas originally that that was the direction it was these the weapons had weight to them blah blah blah Which actually there's a meme that just came out a week ago. I read it was like a

My five-year-old watching Star Wars the New Hope or the Revenge of the Return of the Jedi. Like dad are lightsabers made of light? Why does that one have a shadow and in the fucking shot? There's a shadow of the lightsaber on the ground. Oh, that's interesting. Huh? And it's like me a 37 year old man. What the fuck? It's a lightsaber.

Now I'm trying to find out... Yes, you want to make the thing called a light saber made of weight. It was the 70s! Cut him some slack! Or I guess it was the 80s. It started in the 70s, I guess. We're talking about Return of the Jedi, though. I just like when the most famous effects they use...

When the speeder's going across the desert and George Lucas took Vaseline and put it on the camera lens so it looks like there's not wheels on the speeder that has wheels. Like little shit like that is so fucking cool. They did some crazy shit to make the original. That was back when it was like B-movie shit. I dig that. Like, because they didn't have any fucking budget so they actually had to, God forbid, think about things. That is my favorite.

favorite era and I still try to do that and I will always try to use practical over VFX if you can mix them I think that's the most beautiful thing you can do but like practical old Star Wars the aliens fucking my favorite move the thing thing is fucking amazing really the

thing oh one of my favorite movies that i mean for practical horror i'd say yeah oh pan's labyrinth not pans just like the lab right with uh david bowie yeah yeah like all that little animatronic shit too man hinson did all that and it's in both yeah and he was a master pan's labyrinth too see that's what he did pan's labyrinth too i don't

that from the mind of jim henson yeah but guamard del toro directed that i think no he just did the henson did the puppetry yeah he did that yeah it's fucking amazing i think so i could be making that up no you're right i only know who did because you said the thing is yours right i only know who did that because it's in rick and morty oh yeah the uh cronenbergs yeah

Have you seen the new movie he's coming out with? Cronenberg just came out with a fucking freaky ass movie. We're talking about this. Something from the future. Yeah. Yeah, the fucking trailer for it. God damn it. What was it called? Sins of the Future or something like that. Dude, all these fucking... See, there's so many stories. Lord of the Rings. Fucking $500 million budget for this season. For what? The new Lord of the Rings. There's a Lord of the Rings coming out? I didn't even fucking know that. Amazon bought it. Amazon bought the rights to it. They're making a show. Here's the problem. They only bought the rights to...

like the story that was already told and they're just inventing new shit off of it they're not going into any of the old lord of the rings it's not like the similar in samarilla yeah yeah take me a second again i'm gonna chew on those words for me it's about the rat to salmonella yes the salmonella rats were not purchased i love tolkien salmonella dude that works that

the game of thrones if we have a brunch joint we need to make that a dish tolkien salmonella it's like a chicken sandwich jesus yeah we don't cook it just eat it it's just raw chicken breast all right well if you're ordering that here's the waiver

It's a challenge. Also, here's some good luck. Don't die. You just have the list, like the pegboard of completed winners of the challenge, and it's empty. No one hit. You could be the first. It's living past. People that finished it list, people that survived after a week list. Bunch of names on this one. Very sparse on the next. Three pegboards. They look visibly ill in the second photo. Yeah.

They're hospital pictures. It's like Chernobyl photos. They're just dying. The third one is in marble. Why didn't our brunch place work out?

Dude, I murdered the patrons for one. Star Wars needs to do like old, old, like Revan or even going back before Revan with like Tulek. I was looking up. I was like, trust Disney to do that. Yes, I do. Disney, right? Well, some of the directors, if it's, what's his name? Filioni? Yeah. Yeah. He can do whatever the fuck he wants with Star Wars. And he's good. He's so good. What's he done?

Mandalorian Iron Man but no no that's every bit of Jon Favreau Jon Favreau and Filione together are fucking awesome they did Mandalorian Clone Wars was Filione like those dudes are fucking like they got the good episodes of Boba Fett the good episodes yeah Tula Kord if they did Tula Kord in his fucking prime I'd just be like

Old Knights of the Old Republic? Yep. So Tulik Horde was one of the OG Sith. The first and the second, right? So Darth Vader killed 30 Jedi, right? I think he hunted and killed like 30 or 40 Jedi in his time. Tulik Horde killed a thousand in one set. Like a thousand over. Dude, Tulik Horde was a fucking monster. He was like the ancient Egyptian of Sith. He's considered the greatest saber combat duelist

Period like no one would fuck even the Jedi wouldn't even go to war with him because how strong he was like What was his tomb in Knights of the I do believe or the two nights a little too I think it's one he's fucking gnarly looking bro He murdered over a thousand Jedi and during the war he would just slay Sith and Jedi alike like people would not fuck with that dude and

Oh, he's got like an arm shield on him too. He looks like a Fallout character. Yeah, he's gnarly as fuck. And he used Jedi, he used Sith magic, which went away later because it's a forgotten thing. That dude was a fucking monster and he just. Is it extended universe? It doesn't exist anymore. I, oh, but.

But that's the one I was like, go back and show him just murder. Revin. Revin too. Revin's like, fuck off. Give us Revin and Malik. Give us the origin story of Knights of the Old Republic. Why is that not a movie yet? That's the one. Knights of the Old Republic was one of my favorite games. Like,

Good play that one coming back. No, I remember that was a little just slightly before my time you go and I do I didn't do PC stuff back in the day play because they're They're they're remastering. Oh, yeah, they are public. I would actually play it. I love that dude I put so many hours into that on Xbox that is against it's probably the choice game like where you get like, you know It's like oh good or bad like your choices going to go Sith was

amazing like it was ak-74 the droid uh wait what hk 47 47 there you go so you just close to home here but you could literally talk to him like and then you would rile up if you were going sith and you could go full sith when you're trying to like have families like discuss not killing each other

You'd be like, man, that guy called you a piece of shit. Like, you're supposed to de-escalate the situation. You walk up to one side and you're like, hey man, that dude talks shit and they said they're gonna fucking shoot you. Then your droid walks over because your droid's

Also evil and he's like yeah, bro that other dude He said you're a fat piece of shit and your wife's whore just saying and then you just watch the families murder each other Cody down The game was so good on some of those things I was like this is like that was a city and right who made the original fable

Yeah, right? Okay, I was wondering why that sounded familiar. I could be wrong. I'm pretty sure Obsidian made the original Fable, though. Because that's what basically... That was in the days of Star Wars where they would just contract out whatever. They're like, oh, you want to make a Star Wars game? Really? Yeah, they just gave it away. 30% royalties. Fucking go for it, dude. And that game got, like, that slayed across the board. That got really good fucking reviews. The choice mechanics going Sith or Jedi. Holy shit, it changed things.

Yeah, it was very defining on it. All those little things. The guy stuck in the locker. He's afraid, so he's literally hiding in the locker and he won't come out because a wave of enemies came through and killed shit. If you're going Sith, it's like, come on out. They made Nezuko Republic 2. Who made the first one? The first one was... That was a good one. The second one was amazing too. It was still another. The first is...

Hmm, that's good the one I was you know I was thinking about this fucking guy where I made the first file where I was thinking about this yesterday the game that was my game growing up was for Star Wars was Clone Wars. Oh my god Holy fuck. I was thinking like I would literally just just pay somebody to

Like start a, you know, GoFundMe or whatever. I put my own money into that to have that remastered. Like modern graphics, same story, same audio, same everything. Just modernize the graphics. Maybe the gameplay just a little, just like small changes and you're good. Not like they did with Battlefront though. Because Battlefront, they changed the game. Oh my God. Fable was Lionhead. I was off on all that. Sorry, I had to.

I wear bio-wear because bio and that's why the first one was considered the pinnacle and I mean the options the dude in the locker he's hiding he's terrified and you can be like he's like I won't come out and choice options come out right now or I'll fucking kill you or it's like come on I killed everything like get the fuck out yeah it's safe it's like get the fuck out

He's like, no, I'm not coming out. He's like, get out or I'll kill you. It's like, I'm staying in here. Okay. Insert lightsaber into locker. You turn it off and just slide it in and pull it out. You didn't lie to the guy.

Like oh man this game is gnarly and you can do that the entire game is just murder So it's not like you choose in the beginning like Sith Jedi. It's like okay It's literally got a skill you so you have neutral your course is literally just karma. Yes. Yeah It was honestly one of the karma system. Holy fuck. We're talking about video games. What the fuck um Come 20

It literally at the more evil decisions it would like dark eyes would turn that golden dark color if you were good you would What happened holy shit you glow a blue? Evil decisions return that dark color Oh

Evil. Very evil. I'll give you guys that clip if you want it. Can we talk about that one? Can we explain that real quick? Yeah, please. So, Clean. Gaming. We talked about this when it first happened. Did we? Yeah, I'm pretty sure Clean was on the podcast. I wasn't there for that. No, this was like...

We'll tell it again. Yeah, we need to tell the story again. Oh, yeah. This is early. This is the one that has like 5,000 views. It was me, T-Rex Arms, I think Pace Performance, Clean, and Nikita, the developer from Escape from Tarkov. I was talking about like this new faction, right? The Dark Division or whatever the hell it is. I haven't gotten to the funny part yet.

We know the punchline. I got you, bro. I got him. But he just said something like... We're having a whole podcast about just gun stuff and Tarkov and everything, and he's talking about some of his new ideas. One of these black guys...

The ultimate evil, uh, you know, just... And I start fucking losing my shit, because I have no poker face. Immediately, you're like... You're like me, Drake, like... Yeah, your eyes are like... Because I immediately made eye contact through the screen with clean. I'm like, better clean that one up.

So I mean like a dark side Dark site yeah, yeah, no like or something like dark division dark. Yeah some mercenary group right yeah, so I'm rushing fuck your shit up mercenaries like but bear you know Dark division developer dark English is not the first language out of context Division it was the black division. That's what that's what you guys were talking about. Yeah, he uh

Yeah. And Clean went in for the save. He's like, the division, the black division. Yeah, this black division, right? He's like, yes. What did you think I'm talking about? Welcome to America!

Powerful you know blah blah like they wrote in the evil Like is these black guys You see everyone's face like Because the other like Paul and and like Lucas, I think they kept their shit together pretty well I just started cracking up. You're just like big eyes like I

I can see it in his eyes, like, looks at me on the screen, I'm crying, he's just like, "So, uh, Black Division, am I right?" Oof.

here for you guys you can watch it too right now right here we'll put it right here those black guys it's unavoidable unavoidable evil like with the tremendous sizes like super evil thing yeah the the black division unit in uh you are like actually nothing to compare compared to this force that is so good all those little clips i'll send you the clip lock

I mean, yeah, someone just posted. I just showed Savannah that like a week ago or two weeks ago.

Cause I was like, watch Brandon's eyes and I zoom in and your eyes are like Cause you're in like mid-whiskey and it's like, yeah, he was mid-whiskey. It was that, oh fuck right? Yeah, it was like here and then frame two. It was like your eyes were noticeably open like, fuck my life. Something has gone terribly wrong. No poker face at all. I'm awful at it. Nope. Same bro, same. Oh man.

Hey, at least that's going good. See, it's not that bad of a time right now. You have stocks and all that, but games and movies, not much games. Stocks are real bad. Movies, though. Crypto and stocks are bad and they're getting worse. It's going to get worse. We're headed for a major recession, if not a depression. Stock up on canned food and shotguns. That's great. I just want to shoot ammo. Oh, yeah. So you can shoot them in the air when intruders come around. Body armor.

Oh yeah, that's illegal now. Well, in New York? Yeah. I think they're passing it. Have they passed it yet? I don't know. I'm pretty sure it passed, didn't it? Yeah, they signed a bill. They signed it. I don't know. Yeah, it made it through one of the steps that was like, you can't own body armor anymore. We don't have to show us. Like it passed the house and like we'll never pass the Senate and they just promote it. Like it's still bullshit either way.

Like, oh, wow, a bunch of people are getting shot. What's the one thing that will prevent that? Yeah, ban that. What stops bullets? Let's make that illegal. I don't... You're dumb.

You're dumb! Stop it! Politicians are dumb. Save it with the hot takes. Dude, if you're over the age of 65, you need to be out of office like tomorrow. Let's have a cognition test for office. I just know when I can watch somebody drive and be like, this person's fucking old! And then road rage and Eli, I'm just like, and I pull up and I'm like, and I'm like, that dude...

Is making choices. They say stereotypes don't exist, but I can pretty much predict what driver I'm about to pass. Every time. Every fucking time. Like 80% right. That poor lady that almost hit my Porsche the other day. Oh, yeah, dude. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Oh, this is the one that yelled at you. She got mad at you, right? I yelled at her. I was like this, and then she was like pointed at the thing. I was like...

Now you get angry. There's shadows going out my window and I'm confused why there's shadows outside my window. Deer. Bears? Deer bears. There's some in my backyard. Bear deers. I think we've got this covered. Between the four of us, I think we'll be okay. I know, I'm just confused. Look around, look around. Unless Batty has no ammo in this house. This is going to be a 4K snuff film. I don't see that ever. It's confusing. If he had no ammo in this house, I think the rest of the three of us have it covered.

That is very true. Got you, Bax. I hope so. Dude, are they coming for your dragon skulls? It's the IRS. The IRS too, dude. They're like peeking through shit. They start conversating and the cameras are like, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. The cameras are not bad. Leave the cameras.

Hard catcher of the next episode is us. We're in long chairs. We're outside. We're in tattered t-shirts like we're fucking homeless. Batty's gone. Cooking some like fucking spam. Beans and franks over a fire. So, the IRS came. Thank you for watching the unsubscribe podcast. As always, Eli DoubleTap, Bonobopperator, and the beautiful...

Wonderful amazing sexual hot one of his hair Brad Herrera the AK guy and Patty screams I'm going with baddie screams from now on way better do baddie streams is literally you screaming into that I was like why why I hate it so much you're screaming just change it to baddie screams No, they were watching the podcast make sure to LIKE subscribe follow unsub touch kiss. We'll see you next time

He's just a fucking dick. His body. Wait. He's got a fat dick. Oh yeah, that's how Danny sang it. That's right. I forgot. I gotta go. A new song. I believe in you. I'm gonna struggle with this now. What was your ASVAB score again? Four. He was infantry. Yeah, use your teeth. Everyone gets mad when I do that though. Because you do it on steel.