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Hi, and welcome to IKEA. How can I help? My schedule is crazy. I just want some me time. Maybe it's time to embrace the joy of staying in. With comfortable beds, pillow and decor, mood lighting, and so much more, you can turn your bedroom into the place to be. Oh, sounds like a dream. We've got you. Visit us in-store or at IKEA-USA.com to create your dream bedroom today. It's Sophia Franklin, and you are listening to Sophia with an F.
But I think I'm in the mood for a quickie. I think I will be connecting with you guys on a much deeper level as well because I think I've been hiding a lot of my life from you guys and that's not going to be the case anymore because I've got nothing to hide.
Good morning and good afternoon or good night. It is me, it is I, Sophia Franklin, your host, your co-host, your audio engineer, and your best friend, but most of all, your teacher, because it is time for a little Sloot University on this mini Monday.
I mean, if you don't follow me on social media, you should. You will see me wearing this very gorgeous crew neck that does say Slut University that does not exist anymore. Unfortunately, the company that I used to, you know, create clothes with
They kind of, they had an issue called bankruptcy. So merch will be coming, but SLU University. God, I fucking miss college. I really do. I think about going back sometimes and I'm like, there's no way people in grad school rage the same way we did when we were in undergrad. Right?
I heard that they party 10 times harder. So I don't know. Maybe I'll pull like a Mary Kate and Ashley Olsen and do that. But I think we all know that is 99.9% not happening. But I think we all know that is 99.9% not happening.
why would I go to school when I fucking have a 10 year and I teach for a living? So let's jump in to this university because it's actually really important to me. And I think you guys have all been kind of wondering what the fuck I was up to in the Bahamas on my solo trip.
And today's class is how to travel solo and how to do it well. And listen, because I am so self-aware, I will preface by saying I understand that me going to the Bahamas by myself at a five-star resort for three nights total is
Is not necessarily the same as me going to Cambodia. Backpacking. And immersing myself in a totally different culture. And yada, yada, yada. And staying in hostel. Like I get it. However. It was still me. Getting on an airplane. Figuring out how to get from place to place to place. And doing it by myself. And...
Not having anyone with me at night to fall asleep. Not having anyone with me, period. Well, kind of, sorta. I got enough of a taste of it to know what I would do differently and what I want to do next time. Because there will be a next time. I can promise you that. So let me tell you a little bit about the trip.
A, so you can see what I'm wearing. B, because I was posting up a storm and I think it was pretty apparent that like I was going through some shit. Okay. And the reason I decided to go on this trip is because I don't really have a reason. But let me just like give you a little backstory.
It was Saturday, Sunday, I don't know what fucking day it was. Hence me kind of going through shit. I didn't even know what day of the week it was. I just remember I had major anxiety. I've been dealing with this situation here in New York. My mom was leaving that night and...
I just had this, I had fight or flight mode, literally. And I decided to fly away from my fucking issues. Like I just, I went with my gut and I was kind of like grappling with it. And I was like, if you're like really going through it, do you really feel like you should be
traveling by yourself and without your support system and I was like yeah actually I do because I think that's part of the problem is I've been running away from me for a really long time so on a whim I see what's available and you know the thing is is New Yorkers are rich and
Well, a lot of them. And they like to travel and they will fucking book everything the fuck up. I love how I sound angry like about...
People who live in New York who book vacations for themselves. Yeah, I'm talking to you assholes. But I did find this lovely hotel and it wasn't in Bermuda, which would have been the quicker flight, but it was in the Bahamas. And I did book it through a travel agent because she has access to things that I would not have
And she's the fucking best. And I will at her when this episode drops on my Instagram, TikTok, whatever. Shout out Nadine. And so that's kind of where my mental was at.
So my flight is at like 7 a.m. in the morning. I don't sleep the night before. I have crippling anxiety, but I'm also like filled with excitement because I've never done anything like this before ever. And let's just get right into it. Day one, because I went through a travel agent thing,
There are certain perks that come along with that. And I really received the royal treatment. Like, I got an entire butler service. Like, there were three butlers that...
were there to take care of me. I was just greeted by the man. Like it was, I got all the bells and whistles. I was upgraded to a room. It's like kind of ironic. That was really meant for like, I don't know, a family. It was definitely meant for a
a married couple and their three annoying kids. Like it had a ginormous living room. Then you open a door into this huge master bedroom. Like it was big and it was just kind of funny because there I am just me for the first time, but it was great. The thing about traveling by yourself is you
People will ask you immediately, what's up? I don't know if it's just women traveling by themselves. I don't know if it's like the destination I went to. Like, why are you like this is for families and couples? Like, I have no idea. But the first person I spoke to was like, why are you here alone? Who are you meeting up with? What's going on?
And I have no filter and had no one that I was really talking to about this trip. And so I indulged them, I think more than they even wanted. The taxi driver, he asked me if I'm meeting someone at the hotel. This is probably like also dangerous, by the way.
He asked me if I'm meeting someone and I'm like, absolutely fucking not. It is just me. No one knows I'm here. This sounds crazy. I wouldn't recommend that. But I knew I was safe. Was it the hotel transportation? No, because I'm a girl who will spend money when money needs to be spent. But I'm going to save if the taxi is half the price.
So I'm getting asked by everybody. And then when I'm checking into the hotel, I don't even think the concierge asked me to be honest, but I could not help myself. And I told everybody, I am going through some shit and I'm here alone. And I've never done something like this before. I'm going through it. And I feel like everybody should know why I'm
Don't know. Don't care. I'm just an honest human being and you guys seem really nice and I will talk to whoever will listen. So that was day one. That was day one. That wasn't night one. So I sit down for lunch and once again...
Within 30 seconds of me sitting my ass down before I could even order a margarita, this couple next to me, this older couple, they look over at me and the dude, without any qualms or hesitation, goes, are you here alone? And...
I was like, I sure am. And I start pulling my laptop out. I have like work to do. Basically from that one second and interaction onward,
I was part of their family. Like that family took me in like an orphan. I did not leave their side. We exchanged numbers. I FaceTimed their children. I learned about their relationship. They invited me to fucking Michigan to go stay with them and they live on the lake.
I was only away from them for a split second when I went back to my hotel room to get ready. And I did contemplate for a second, like, or is this really what you're trying to do? I went to dinner with this couple and the husband's entire work family and
And I just joined this table of 20 and I sat at the head of the table and it was just complete beautiful chaos. And that is like this really amazing thing that happens when you travel solo. Just saying.
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Your cash back really adds up. Day two. I wake up super late. I wake up hungover and I wake up depressed. Day one was filled with excitement. I don't really know what I'm getting into. Alcohol, distraction after distraction after distraction,
And then I had to wake up and my family, like my foster family, they left. Like they're back in Michigan and maybe this is where the solo trip really begins. And everything I was running from just came flooding back in. Like I, it was just crippling anxiety. I did not feel good. I was not happy.
And I wake up and I look at my texts and there are texts that I do not want to fucking see. I have some texts from the butlers, which this is like, it's like, okay, I, it was a mix between royal treatment and
And very concerned, serious surveillance. Like the entire resort knew what I was going through. So I open my text messages from the butler. And he asked me if he can escort me to the beach. Because I said that was like my main fucking goal. And I told him that no, not an issue. Like I can walk alone there.
And the response was, "I hope that you are feeling okay today as well." It was like a sweet sentiment for sure. Totally. It sounded a little bit concerned. Like I don't think that that follow-up would happen to someone under different circumstances. You know what I mean? It was comedy. Like it really was.
So I spend the day at the beach. I make sure I'm not going to drink alcohol, but I'm still kind of distracting myself. Then that night I'm watching a lot of like self-help YouTube videos. Uh, I do a lot, a lot of sobbing and crying. And then it's day three.
And I feel better because I feel more comfortable. Like I've got my bearings in at this point and I am not hung over anymore. And I make a commitment to myself to do the things that actually make me feel good. Maybe not in the moment, but long term.
I do my morning routine, which is integral to my happiness. Which brings up this question. And I am so fucking curious. And I am going to post this on my story. And I can't believe I didn't do it when I was there. Do you make the bed when you are staying in a hotel? Because you know there is room service, like,
Do you still make the bed or do you let housekeeping take care of it? Because making the bed is like step one in my morning routine and I was making the bed. I meditated, I worked out, I went to the beach, I drank water and I had dinner plans. My first dinner solo.
That was another interesting element to all of this. I wasn't nervous per se. It absolutely helped that it was sushi and I got to sit at a sushi bar. But like I kind of was thinking to myself, like what does one do when they go to dinner by themselves? Like for real? Because like I don't want to be the bitch that's just like sitting on my phone, you know? Do I bring a book?
No, because then I would have to bring a book light because I know where I'm headed. I'm going to Katsuya, this like trendy sushi spot that's going to be like dark with like bumping music. And you could not catch me taking a fucking book light. Like absolutely not. Should I bring an iPad like a fucking toddler? No.
Who's third wheeling and his parents are just trying to keep him preoccupied. Sure. Yeah. Let me bring my iPad and like, let me ask for a high chair to sit in. Like I, I'm not going to bring any props. I'm just going to go as myself. Thank God. Again, I was sitting at a sushi bar. Was I able to speak to the sushi chef? No, he was a little bit busy. Did I spend it?
telling the server and the bus boy and the food runner every single thing about my life. Yes. And I'm not going to lie to you guys. I think I started to do it more and more because you do receive better treatment because everyone is like been through some shit. And I
You know, I don't think they get a lot of people, you know, running through there by themselves. And I don't think they have a lot of people like that open and honest about why they're there. So did I get a free fucking mochi ice cream plate? No, but it was a cool experience. I did spend the entire time on the phone, but I know for next time that...
We're going to leave the phone at home and really do it alone. So here are my takeaways. If you are planning on traveling solo, go into it with an intention. Just like any other trip. Get it? Like a drug trip? Okay. Think about what the purpose is for you going. How do you want to use this time that you may never get again?
Because like you truly may never get this time again. Do you want to connect with people? Do you want to connect with yourself? Do you want it structured? Do you want it totally unstructured and exploratory? Do you want to challenge? Do you want to just chill?
I wish I would have kind of gone in with an intention. I realized this thing where I felt guilty because I wasn't working. And then when I was working, I felt guilty that I wasn't spending the time relaxing. It's like, what the fuck? Oh, it's like when I notice my thoughts and feelings,
perspective and when I noticed just how like cuckoo cuckoo it is thank god I can catch it but it's like you're damned if you do damned if you don't and I'm working on that but at the same time like I learned a lot about myself distractions and all for me personally my next solo trip my intention will be to
self-explore and self-love and self-accept and get to know myself and start from the beginning and get to know myself all over again because I think I lost a sense of who I am somewhere along the way. I mean, it's still there, but that's what I want to do.
And that's the hard shit. Because let me tell you, there were multiple moments throughout the trip that felt very lonely, very scary. And sitting there with yourself and your thoughts is kind of doing the work.
And I mean, I can do that here in New York, but there's something about the isolation and the new environment that I think can be really, really conducive to this. And with that, Sleuths, I love you guys so much. And I think on my journey to self-exploration,
I think I will be connecting with you guys on a much deeper level as well because I think I've been hiding a lot of my life from you guys and that's not going to be the case anymore because I've got nothing to hide. And with that, Sleuths, I will talk to you next week.
