SOS 51:03

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Hello, everybody. Good morning. Good afternoon. Good evening. Good night. Whatever fucking time of day it is for you. I hope it's a great time. Welcome to Sophia with an F.

I'm recording from WTF Media Studios, the only place to fucking record, okay? I'm in the New York location because, duh, it's me. Where else would I be? But their LA location is just as sick, so absolutely check it out. And...

Subscribe Just go ahead and subscribe to me I mean you can subscribe to WTF The Studios I don't know To their Instagram page but 100% subscribe To Sophia with an F because It will make you horny and it will make you happy You know and we all need Some shit like that right now Okay

Let me just get this off my chest right away. I got to be real with you guys. Like that new fucking app, Be Real, that all the kids are using that I absolutely refuse to use. But yeah, I want to be real. I spoke about changes that were coming. I sounded like one of those fucking old ladies who are out of their minds crazy and they're holding a candle, staring out the window with a premonition like...

Like times are coming, like things are changing. I gave you guys that whole spiel.

And I meant it. And it was honest and it was truthful and it is still happening. Not at the rate I was expecting. You guys fucking know. You guys know how this works. You have something big planned. There is a lot of, you know, shit and effort and time and creativity and people that goes into it. It never ends up meeting the deadline. Also...

If you guys know me, we should have all known, okay? It wasn't going to meet the fucking deadline. But with that, I just want to say there are some very, very big changes coming. And...

And you guys are going to be fucking stoked. So just bear with me. I might string you along a little bit. You like it. You know, you like it. You don't want me to just like give it all up to you on the first night. Like you want you want to enjoy the chase a little bit. Come on. Let's be real. All right. Before we get into this episode.

I am recording by myself. I am here with Yomi, my producer though. Shout out Yomi. Before we get into it, I want to update you guys on just my life in general. What updates do I have for you guys? Oh, I want to start by just giving you a little recap of my weekend.

So I went to this place called Casa Cipriani. I'm pretty sure everyone knows what Cipriani is, right? Lana Del Rey mentions it in one of her songs. And you're going to see Kendall Jenner there. You're going to see Hailey Bieber. You're going to see all the people there. Whatever. My point is Casa.

Casa Cipriani opened up, I believe, a couple years ago. It's on the water and it's the Cipriani restaurant, but a membership club also. Okay. The reason I'm pointing this shit out is so you guys get an understanding of what type of establishment this place is. Like they have a... What is it called? Not a suit. A jockey coat? No.

Some fancy fucking coat that men have to wear to be allowed inside, all right? Like they have those waiting for you on deck. They will make you put it on. I honestly think the food is like a little bit, I think it's just, I think it's way overrated. I don't really get it, but also I've been highly intoxicated every time I've gone and like haven't really gone for like the food experience, you know?

I mean, actually, I was when I was in Italy. This is a very quick side note and I will get back to my story. I was talking to this dude, this Italian dude. He told me Cipriani basically they just warm up their shit in the microwave. Like it's not made fresh. Like they just have it sitting there, warm it up in the microwave, throw it out there. You know, it's become a chain of sorts.

Oh, the amount of enemies I make for absolutely no reason. Sometimes I really wonder. So back to the story. Casa Cipriani, you need a membership. It's very juju, very whatever. So my two guy friends invite me. OK, I show up. I'm already hammered.

And I walk in and there's a line of 10 people. This is the thing.

I don't do lines. I just, I know it sounds snobby. I know it sounds annoying. I just, I would rather sit at home than wait in a line to, to fucking see, I don't know, Beyonce in concert. Okay. Well that's an exaggeration, but like I fucking hate them. I will not do them.

So there's a line and I'm like, okay, well these people are checking into like the hotel that this Casa Cipriani place is at. And I just quickly, just quickly, I wasn't rude. I didn't butt the line because I think that's very rude. Although I will do it from time to time. I go up to the front desk lady and I say, hey,

My name is under the reservation, Sophia Franklin. I'm here with Jack. And she's like, sweetie, if you could just hold on one minute. Okay, great. I get in the line. I'm sitting there. I'm waiting. Get to the front of the line. Repeat myself once again. And I could tell that she was kind of looking at me in the line, like,

like just more than you would, you know, normally look at a human being. So I get to the front and the lady behind the desk says, Oh my God, you know what? Um, I'm not seeing your name here, but, uh, Jack can just come down and get you if that works for you. So I'm

I'm already in a in a bad mood because I had to wait in line and the lady behind the desk now proceeds to tell me yes Jack mentioned you but he has to physically come downstairs and get you.

Why? Why? And you know what I said? I said, call Jack right now. She said, OK. She calls Jack. She said, yes, Jack just confirmed that you can go up. And I'm like, great. Thank you so much, ma'am. She she's like, no, no, no, no, no. Not so fast. He he still needs to come down and get you. I'm like, what the fuck was the point of the phone call? Now this.

This is where the story gets really fucking good, people. Because after that whole debacle, this lady, she was younger, okay? Probably in her 20s. She says, are you Sophia Franklin as in Sophia with an F?

And I said, oh my God, yes, that's me. Thank you so much for listening. That means the world to me. And she's going on and on and on. I fucking love your show. It's my favorite podcast, blah, blah, blah, blah. I'm like, thank you. You're the best. Okay, like you could let me up, right? Like you, what, you know, I can go ahead and just get in the elevator, right? She told me no. No.

She for sure 100% is listening right now I have never felt more helpless and just like in awe in fucking awe how are you gonna tell me no after that

Okay, you know what? Anyways, that was a story. If you're wondering if I ever made it upstairs, I didn't. I bitched out Jack and the other guy. And I was like, this is so fucked up that you made me wait for 20 minutes. And I ran away crying, waiting for my Uber, which is completely fine. You're allowed to cry and show your emotions when you're having a hard time. Okay, so that was my weekend. Um,

What else happened? I mean, I feel like a bunch of shit has gone down, but I think it's time for us to get into the episode. And I think everyone fucking agrees. Okay. And I really just want to give back to the sleuths in this episode. Therefore, I want to focus on your guys' questions and giving you guys advice and hearing your stories. Because I'm fucking good at giving advice.

And I'm not even going to follow that up with some self-deprecating joke that I usually would do. I'm going to own it. I am very good at giving advice. It's one of my, you know, great qualities. It's something great about me. I want to hear from you guys and engage with you guys and your questions and your stories, uh,

Some of them are even hard for me to answer. All right. So without further ado, S.O.S. Save our sleuths. Questions, stories, advice. Let's fucking go. It's party time because these these are these are next level. OK, first question. Hi, Sophia. Any tips on how to deal with guys losing interest after having sex?

even when you know the sex was good. For reference, me and this guy went all night eight times. Damn. And I understand he probably just wanted casual sex and nothing more, but just tips on how to deal with the disappointment. Thanks, love. Okay, let me tell you a little something about sex, all right? Especially casual sex.

And this is going to sound really crazy and probably hypocritical compared to things I've said in the past. It does not matter how hot you are or how much of a freak you are in bed. It really doesn't.

What matters the most is the chemistry that you have with a certain person. Okay? So let me just put that out there. Obviously, you get points for being, you know, Victoria's Secret model, hottest bitch on earth. Obviously, you get points if you do a backflip on his dick. Obviously.

But you could you could do both of those things and just be a sexual deviant freak troll that like, you know, sucks his soul out of his penis. Plus, you look like Adriana Lima. But if the chemistry is not there, it doesn't really matter. And I know that sounds wild coming from me and it just in general, but it's true.

This is a perfect example. I actually was having a conversation like this last week. This dude is showing me, he's scrolling on Instagram. A very hot girl that I follow catches my eye. And I asked him, oh, you follow that girl? He said, yes, naturally. Follow up question. Did you fuck her? He goes, yeah, actually I did.

That's when I mean that is just when we take a fucking it's like it's like it's literally like oh I know how the rest of this night is going type thing you know it's like oh my fucking god hand me a martini do we have some catching up to do baby it's it's literally like we

When you haven't seen your best friend in fucking years because she's been like abroad and she gets back and it's like, girl, let's cuddle up on the couch with wine. We have so much to catch up on. The second a dude tells me, yes, I had sex with that girl. It's similar to that. You know what I mean? It's like, baby boy, I cannot wait for this slumber party we're about to have. So he tells me he fucked her.

And my follow up question, which is standard, is, OK, well, was it a one time thing? Did you guys date? What's the deal? And he tells me it was just a one time thing. That was it. I think we maybe texted once after that, but that was it. Follow up question.

That's not enough of an answer, sir. Can you please elaborate on that? What does that mean? Why was it only one time? What does that mean? There was maybe a text after. I need details. I need beginning, middle and end type thing. And he told me that. And by the way, this girl is gorgeous as fuck. I have followed this girl since.

I don't know, 10 years ago. I remember coming across her profile and, you know, feeling a little jelly being like, I would love to have a face like that and a body like that, which we try not to do anymore. We don't compare. I am much older and I feel better, you know, like I feel very confident with myself, but I was intrigued. So I'm like, how are you fucking this hot ass bitch?

And it doesn't turn into anything. Okay. Cause you fucked me. I'm pretty sure basically one night stand and it's turned into something. So what, something's not adding up either. She wasn't into you or you're lying about it.

And he said, I swear to God, she actually wasn't to me. She texted me the next day after we fucked and invited me to go do something. And I was about to tell specifics, but I probably shouldn't.

And I'm just going to say, actually, she invited him to go to Six Flags, the amusement park, the next day. Okay? Which means she liked the sex, whatever. And he kindly declined her offer. My little tiny pea brain couldn't understand. I couldn't understand. I was like, wait, you have... Hold on, hold on. Let me get this straight. You have a drop-dead gorgeous girl...

you on the first night at a party by the way in the bathroom which is fucking hot and you don't wanna you know maybe fuck her again maybe see where things go like and and then I asked was the sex horrible he said no it was good the sex was good so I'm thinking to myself super hot bitch I

Right in bed. What is the fucking issue? And he verbatim told me, it's just a feeling. I didn't have that vibe with her. I didn't get that feeling with her. It's just a feeling. I don't know how to fucking explain it, Sophia. It just wasn't there for me. So I don't know. That was very eye-opening to me. So to this person's question, when she asked, how can I not feel bad about it when I...

you know, have casual sex with a dude and nothing comes from it and they lose interest. You guys are just not each other's people. That's it. It has nothing to do with your looks. It has nothing to do with your performance in the bedroom, which, by the way, can I just applaud you on going eight rounds in one night? That's pretty fucking unbelievable. And

I mean, I just think that in itself should make you feel better. It's not about your looks or your sexual... What's the word? Sexual... Your sexual expertise. It's not about that. It's about you.

and your personality, and you as a human being. That's a fucking joke. It just means you guys didn't have chemistry. That's it. Nothing to do with you, girlfriend. And probably everything to do with him, not to mention nine times out of ten, a guy just wants to fuck and wants to move on. He just wants to come, and that's it.

So I think for you, you want tips on how to deal with the disappointment. I've been there. I have had sex where the dude ghosted me after. I mean, hello, it's happened to everyone.

I go into those sexual experiences basically expecting that there will be no further conversation after the sex you need to set your expectations right you can't go in there thinking oh my god like maybe this could be something no go in there hey I

Hopefully we'll have an orgasm and this is going to be fun and I can practice my sex for the next guy that's going to come around that I actually have chemistry with and like and maybe don't have as many casual sexual experiences if it doesn't feel good to you. And if it and you know, if it does make you feel disappointed and does fuck with your mental health after sex.

You don't need to go out and have that much sex if you don't want to, you know? Get a sex toy. Hello. All right, next question. Hey, Sophia. Always been genuinely curious if you have small nipples or one of those rare types with little boobs and massive nipples. The world may never know. I'm sorry. This question...

I am not even going to entertain this question and answer it. My nipples, hmm, they are pepperoni nipples, but kind of like the size of a Skittle, and they're...

brown, but they're also just like pink and cherry red and just kind of nude and blend in with my skin and, uh, you know, yada, yada, yada. And, and that's it. I'm not answering this question. I mean, I guess I fucking will because I have a sex podcast there. My nipples are on the smaller side, just like my boobs are on the smaller side, but sir, my boobs and my nipples, uh,

My body, my choice, my boobs, my nipples, my choice. Thank you. We are in a cost of living crisis, people. And everyone knows I am the queen of finding ways to save money. And that applies to my retail therapy as well. Rakuten is going to help you save money, period. I mean, it already has for me. So why wouldn't it for you?

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Your cash back really adds up. Okay, next question. A tip for the girls. There is an app called Splitwise. It lets you split everything at the end of the weekend. My friends and I use it whenever we go on a trip and avoid those Venmo me moments. Okay. I spoke about this in an earlier podcast that, uh,

Venmo friends is what I like to call them are the worst people on planet Earth. I'm sorry. Could you Venmo me? Sorry. Could you just Venmo me real quick? Hey, I sent you a Venmo request. Could you just like, yeah, just yeah, just whenever. I mean, but like, could you just like Venmo me like really? Shut the fuck up.

For the love of God, please, please, I need you to stop. I need the Venmo friend thing to fucking stop, okay? I talked about the rules. If you buy me a coffee at Starbucks and ask me to Venmo you back, die, okay? Just fucking die. Don't get me the Starbucks to begin with. I'm good, girl. I am totally... Anything under $10, you are not allowed to ask for.

for money back is what I think. And I understand times are difficult. I have been broke as fuck before where I couldn't even afford groceries. I have had money before. And if I was in that broke phase, you know what I would do? I wouldn't buy the Starbucks.

I wouldn't purchase something for someone and then ask them and become the biggest embarrassment on planet Earth and ask them to Venmo me $4.28, okay? But anyways, this fucking tip, this app called Splitwise, I fucking love this idea. So I guess, all right, let's see what this app is.

Okay, it lets you and your friends add various bills and keep track of who owes who what. And then it helps you settle up the bill with each other. See, I like this. I like this. If you go on vacation or something and I...

And I buy dinner or I'm, you know, buying 12 rounds of Patron shot. Ew, I would never get Patron. How many more sponsorship possibilities could I lose? I love Patron, but I prefer Casamigos. If I'm buying rounds and rounds for my girlfriends, yeah. Like, you know, at the end of the vacation, we should talk about it. And that's so much better than,

Then the tit for tat, like while you're sitting at the restaurant, like adding up, you know, on your calculator. So I love this. I really, really like this because yeah, shit can add up and you know, you're going to owe each other money. Let's not spend money.

our tanning hours fucking doing the Venmo, Cash App, PayPal shit. Let's just use this app split wise and we'll talk about it at the end. Love this tip, Slu, you are a genius. Okay, next question.

Help. I started seeing my boss and every time we have sex, I notice he keeps his hat on. It's to the point where it irritates the fuck out of me. He only takes a hat off if the lights are off. But during sex, hat on. Eating me out? Backwards hat. Ha ha ha.

I just want to rip it off his little head. I honestly don't care, but he's making it so weird. I really like him because he has money and a nice house and me and my friends can party at it. LMAO, any suggestions? I want to be sensitive because he's insecure about it. Should I just let him continue fucking me with it on? SOS, save me, salute.

The backwards hat while he eats your pussy is something different. That is fucking alarming to me. Holy shit. All right. My advice. There are so many sexy fucking dudes that are bald. Bruce Willis, probably not now, but like back in the day. Jason Statham.

Sexy as fuck. Oh my god. Like I mean dudes that are bald are hot. Okay. And the men listening I would like for you to get that out of your head as well that you need hair to be hot because it's it's just not accurate. We fucking hate a hot fish. So girl if I were you I would low-key put on the movie die hard and

Pulp fiction, whatever movie these hot ass bald actors are in and be like, oh my God, look at how fucking hot he is. Pitbull.

Pitbull, okay? Example number three, Mr. Worldwide. If Pitbull isn't sexy to you, I don't know who the fuck is, but put on one of those movies and talk about how hot they are. And if that's too obvious, you know what I would do? I would jokingly just smack the hat off right off his head. Oh, Dwayne Johnson? Hot as fuck. We forgot about him. Hot?

Okay, basically there is a plethora of hot as fuck dudes. Throw on a fucking show with The Rock and talk about how hot he is.

Common is sexy as fuck. Common also. There's so many dudes, but she can't make it look obvious. You know what I mean? Oh my God, I'm sorry. I absolutely need to watch, you know, this diehard movie right now that came out in the fucking 90s. But there's ways around it. I think though, when it comes to men, because they're so clueless, he may not catch on. You got to be direct, right?

With anything in life, I think being direct is kind of the best way to go about it. Oh my God, she said, "After the lights are out and we are going to bed, then he will take the hat off." So he literally gets in bed under the covers, lamps off, and then throws the hat off. You know what you need to do? Make sure you get up earlier than him.

Be like, "Babe, surprise! I made us breakfast. It's in the kitchen." Be wearing an apron, be naked underneath it, grab him by his arms and pull him into the kitchen. And if he's like, "Wait, wait, my hat." Be like, "I'm sorry, what? You're naked. You're in your boxers. Why would you need your hat?" Force him into situations where the hat cannot be on his head. "Babe, we're going scuba diving."

We're going scuba diving. Oh my god, we're taking lessons because I'm taking you to Bermuda. We're going snorkeling, babe. If he tries to put a swimmer's cap on, then you're out. You're done. You just got to leave. I mean, Michael Phelps is one thing. This guy is a completely different thing. It's just, it's not fucking happening, okay?

Just call him out. I promise you he will respect it more if you are just straight up with him and say, it does not bother me at all, babe. I think it's fucking hot. Just be direct with him and it will be way better than tiptoeing around because that makes it worse. That makes matters worse and more awkward.

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Love you. Can you address the topic of face fucking? It is the hottest trend among my friends, but you seem to ignore this blowing up sex act. Excuse me? Have you ever done it? Should I do it? Is it degrading? Should sleuths try to do it well? Please help. Love you. I love you too.

Girl, for sure. I'm obsessed with you. I don't know who gave you the impression that this is like a sex act that is just recently blowing up. Face fucking? Are we talking skull fucking? Where basically he puts his penis in your mouth and fucks your face? Hi, that's been around for centuries. I have absolutely talked about it before. But how do I feel about it? Have I ever done it?

Take a wild guess. All right. That would be a yes. Should I do it?

That is a personal preference. I say try everything once in the bedroom that you feel comfortable with. I will give you, you know, some advice, some sisterly advice is like it's not it's not my favorite thing to do in the bedroom, right? It's like imagine someone with a dildo just shoving it to the back of your throat vigorously, right? It's

It's like, I mean, it's whatever. It can be hot. Make sure you have your gag reflex ready to fucking go. But I think it can be hot. And I have an even better tip, okay? Because I'm that fucking good at this shit. If you are going to try this out, what I suggest is you should offer it up and say...

Oh my god, I want to try it this way and lay across the bed on your back and then just have your head dangling off the side of the bed and then he can be either standing or kneeling depending on how tall your bed is and face fuck you that way. Skull fuck you, brain fuck you, whatever it is, okay? Your follow-up question, is it degrading? I think I maybe should have started with that one.

When it comes to sex, I don't find anything degrading unless you have said out loud that you are not comfortable with something and they would like you to do a sex act anyways. Like I had a dude ask if he could pee on me once.

And I actually was really close to just letting him. So I was like, whatever, I'll just shower after. But it's just it's not my thing. And I said, no, I wouldn't have necessarily have felt degraded. I think if he peed in my mouth, I would find that degrading. But you need to, you know, make that known. So it's is it degrading? If you ask me, no.

to the fucking no all right I have two dicks school fuck you for all I care like I don't think it's degrading if you wanted to ask my grandmother who is 82 years old and is Mormon she would look at you and not understand what you were saying

And if and if she finally did understand what you were trying to tell her, she would go into an early grave and she would find it very degrading and disgusting. Personal preference. You know what I mean? Should sleuths try to do it? Yeah, go ahead and try it. I think try it. What is the harm? You know what I'm saying? He'll find it hot. I know that.

And then maybe you can be like, I want you to know how this feels. I'm going to put a dildo in your mouth. Just I don't know. So he like gets the idea of the sacrifices you are making for him. OK, next question. Here we go.

Hey, Sophia, you answered my question a few months back on the pod. I was a 32 year old straight male virgin who hired a dating coach and was reluctant to approach girls during the day for feeling like a creep. You gave me advice that really turned things around for me. And I just wanted to tell you how much that meant to me.

Okay, I'm getting teary-eyed. Uh...

That is I mean, okay, I'm not going to get emotional and I'm not gonna make a joke about it Which is usually what I do when I feel uncomfortable this is very very touching to me and means the fucking world to me and I

The fact that my advice was able to help you, even if it's in the tiniest way or in a huge way like this, that just made my day. And that is why I have a podcast and will continue podcasting. So I love you. And I love the fact that you fucking updated me on this shit. Always send me an update. You know what I mean? If I answer one of your questions...

Please update me because I do get invested very, very much so. Your question though at the end was, if only I could find me a salute today. Hey, you've already made huge strides, friends, you're hitting on people during the day. Uh,

you are saying you have a life you feel like for the first time you have a life and you're happy the slew will come the second you are happy with your life that is when the slew will fucking come okay you know i just snuck that question in there to make myself look good though see of course i couldn't have a sentimental moment without like you know throwing in a

Hi, Sophia. So I was on a cruise and met this guy whose only personality trait was being from North Dakota. We hooked up on the last night and I ended up with a UTI, herpes, COVID, and a ripped vagina, three centimeters.

Okay. I had to wear postpartum diapers for three weeks and sit on fucking donut pillows. This question is fucking wild. Out of control.

During the act, he kept telling me he loved me and that his dead grandpa was giving him a sign that I was the one. It's been months and I still wake up in a cold sweat thinking about it. Once I found out the extent of my injuries, I texted him for some help with the ER bill. He responded by sending me good morning texts and pictures of his dog for a week straight.

I took one for the Sloot team and proved North Dakota exists. Could possibly be. I think that's the craziest fucking Sloot question or story that has ever been written in. And way to go, North Dakota. Wait, I mean, what do you have to say for yourself? This is some bad shit.

I thought being from Utah was like fucking embarrassing to say. This is... What do they do in North Dakota? Corn? Cornfields. I guess they're doing a lot more than that. They're fucking giving out UTIs, herpes, and talking about their dead grandparents while they're fucking. There are so many layers to this fucking question. I don't even know where to start. Like...

You know what I find the most disturbing? It's not even the herpes. It's not even the UTI. It's not even the ripped vagina, which are all horrifying, and I apologize. What I find most terrifying is the fact that he is bringing up his dead grandpa in the middle of sex, saying that it's a sign. That his grandpa is showing him a sign, right?

To be fucking like what does that mean a sign like like what is his grandpa doing? What is his grandpa, you know, there in spirit and like, you know, what is his grandpa helping him do during this sexcapade?

making him harder giving him like a harder boner uh making him thrust harder that is like really fucking creepy to me and um i'm really sorry girlfriend and i'm scared of north dakota now not that you should ever let one person be a representation of an entire state but holy shit i think this guy needs to go to jail to be honest

This sounds like someone who, like, this is the beginning stages of some serial killer Jeffrey Dahmer, like, on his way there type shit. Anyways, I would sue this guy also. Why not? I don't know. But, hey, I'm glad his grandpa gave him some sex endurance. ♪ music playing ♪

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I'm

Okay, next question.

Hey, Sophia, do you have any advice for me? I am 24. I tried to go to college like three times and kept dropping out. I've worked shitty admin jobs and hospitality jobs and was literally so bad at them. And basically, I suck at everything and don't want to do anything. Okay, so she sucks at everything and she doesn't want to do anything.

And I can't see myself doing anything. I don't really care. It's just kind of awkward when I meet people. I have to say I don't do anything, but also I don't want to do anything. I don't know. Please advise me. I mean, first thing that comes to mind, you could be homeless. No one will ask you what you do for a living and you don't have to do anything.

I mean, that's the obvious thing. If you genuinely feel like there's nothing in this entire universe that you would want to do,

and you just need something to fucking tell people, it's called lying, sweetheart. Hello, it's called a little white lie. People do it all the time, way more than they should. And this isn't even like a serious lie. This is a lie I fully support. I mean, if someone asks you legit like what your job is, you could really fucking lie and just be like,

or like, I don't know. What are some, I'm a fitness instructor. Like you can say whatever the fuck you want. Who cares? By the way, when you ask someone what they do for a living, their answer is 20% truth, 80% lie.

Anyone I don't care. I don't care who it is that that's just what it is. See that's the thing I wish I was one of those people but I'm not when people say what do you do? I say I own a media company and then they're like, what the fuck does that mean? What is it called? And I say well I own a media company. I I

I'm a podcaster. I have a successful podcast underneath it. I have, you know, a clothing line, like whatever, social media, any entertainment type thing goes underneath the Sloot Media Media Company, right? And then they say, I'm sorry, what is it called? And I say, Sloot.

Sloot media and they say what does that mean and I'm like you know slew it's like a play it's like a play on the word slut and then they look at me like I am full of shit and I'm fucking lying and everything that just came out of my mouth was a big ass lie and then they don't take me seriously I'm just gonna start saying I'm a nurse

That's what I'm going to say. I feel like that's the easiest one. I'm hey, and this is no shade to nurses at all. The fucking schooling to become a nurse. I do not have the brain to do that. So that's not what I'm saying. But that's an easy one. I'm a nurse. I'm a flight attendant.

Um, yeah, girl, very simple. Just fucking lie. Say you're in between jobs, I guess. I don't even know. But I do want to kind of suggest maybe maybe you should get a hobby. All right, guys, here we go. This is the last question.

Oh, this is a great one to end on. Hi, Soph. I am not from America, but I have been seeing a lot of talk about a fentanyl crisis happening in the States. Can you speak to the situation and even add a personal story if you have one? Love you so much, big sister. Okay, I could talk about this for days, but...

Yes, there is a huge fentanyl issue happening in the United States. No question, no doubt. Do I have a personal story? I probably have four or five. And that's not even an exaggeration. I have had friends, you know, have to go to the hospital. I actually had a good friend of mine die, you know,

He was found in his apartment with a tiny, teeny, tiny bag of cocaine on the coffee table. He was alone and had just done a couple lines. There happened to be fentanyl dead and he had a kid and he was like fucking horrible. So I know that I talk about recreational drug use quite a bit and make jokes about it.

The fentanyl issue is a real fucking thing. And...

You know, I used to think like, oh, if I'm at this party and there's like a Coke tray being passed around or like there's a tray that has ketamine, I'm just going to, you know, watch everyone else at the party do it. And if not, everyone drops dead. I'm in the clear. Hand me the fucking rolled up dollar bill. Here we fucking go. But that is not how fentanyl works, you guys. You could just...

inhale or whatever just one teeny tiny microscopic amount of fentanyl and that's it so my suggestion is honestly like don't don't be doing drugs like that right now unless they're like from the doctor if you need to do drugs if you absolutely have to do drugs this is what i'll tell you okay

There is fentanyl testing. I don't think it can be that accurate, but might as well. I would get your drugs from a trusted drug dealer.

That was an oxymoron. Yes, get your drugs from a certified drug dealer. He will show you his diploma. Ask him if he could please bring you his list of references. Yes, a very established and highly recommended drug dealer. But I mean, kinda. And if you want to pop pills, like, I don't know, painkillers,

Don't be getting that shot off the street. Fucking raid your great grandma's medicine cabinet. That was a wild answer for this question, but I'm being dead ass. People are dropping like flies with this fentanyl. Okay guys,

Love you so much. I will talk to you next week. It is Sophia Franklin on all my social media channels. Sophia with an F, Franklin with a Y. I got verified on TikTok. So I'm kind of a big deal and I will be putting that on my resume. And Sleuths, I love you so much. Subscribe and talk to you next week. Bye.