84: Sloots Before Suits 52:38

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Hello, everybody. Welcome to Sophia with an F. You are so lucky to be listening to me this week because I am on a downward spiral per usual. Before we jump into everything, I am recording from WTF Media Studios, a Black-owned studio in Soho. They just opened a new location in Los Angeles, which means they are killing it. But

I'm recording solo this week, kind of. I have kind of an audience. I have my best friend Allie, my producer Yomi, but it's just going to be me. I have no guess. And I just have so many fucking updates for everybody. I'm trying to think of where to start. I have a burning, uncomfortable, horrifying urinary tract infection. And that's really what I want to start this episode off by saying because

If you're watching this shit on YouTube, which by the way, you guys, I just launched a YouTube channel, Sophia Franklin. Sophia with an F, Franklin with a Y. If you're watching me on YouTube and you see me like grab my vagina or cross my legs or –

or look and act super uncomfortable it's because I have a fucking UTI guys I have had a UTI almost every other week since I went through my breakup which I'm going to talk about again in a moment but since I started hooking up with new people like just every other week I've had a fucking UTI and I

They're the worst things in the entire world. The worst UTI I think I've ever had. I was flying from Los Angeles back to New York and I had the worst UTI of my entire fucking life.

And having a UTI on an airplane just hits different because the thing is, is you are either running back and forth to the bathroom because you feel like you need to pee every second. Or if you do what I did, I asked the flight attendant if she could give me 30%.

30 to 60 ounces of water. I literally was about to hand her 20 and be like, I can't deal with these little mini water bottles. I need the big ones. And I will just go and post up in the airplane bathroom. Sophia, are you peeing after sex? Some I mean, they come in me. Yes.

so I don't get pregnant, but I should be peeing every single time. Sounds like that's why you have a UTI. That's why I have a UTI. Also, by the way, for any of my younger listeners, you peeing after sex does not mean you won't get pregnant after they come in.

I just say it like only if they come in me just so I can avoid pregnancy. No, that's that's not going to avoid pregnancy. But I need to start peeing after sex 100 percent or and Naomi, I would love to hear your opinion on this.

I think with certain dudes, your pH balance just doesn't line up with them. You know what I'm saying? Like their dick and their sperm, it just, it doesn't align with your pH balance at all. It sounds like a sneaky link. Yeah.

It sounds like a guy that's doing a lot of shit behind your back without you. Yes, I agree with that. But I do think there's certain instances where like your body and everything going on just does not align with their fucking body and all their shit. I swear to God. And sometimes I wonder like, is that a red flag? Like if you start fucking around with a guy and every time you guys fuck, you're having a bacterial infection or some vaginal issue...

He's probably not the one, right? No, not at all. You need to like leave as soon as possible. Right? Yeah. That's God like showing you that it's time to like knock that shit off. But I'm not going to knock it off because the sex is so fucking good and the UTI is worth it. Which anyways. It's been annoying, but I do want to talk about my breakup a little bit.

So how long have I been broken up? A month, I think roughly around a month. And this is the longest I've gone without speaking to this person, which I just want to preface. I used to talk to this guy every single day, all day. He was my best friend. If I'm sad, like he was my...

security blanket, best friend, boyfriend, my rock, everything. And to go this long without talking to him has been difficult. But the thing is, my coping mechanism and how I've been dealing with this is I just don't think about it. And I've been keeping myself so distracted and so busy that

I love how I say busy. Like I'm out here just working 24 hours a day. When I say busy, I mean busy drinking alcohol, busy going out. I will not allow myself to think about this person or the breakup. The second I have an intrusive thought, I just numb myself, shut it out, and that's it. I just feel like I'm on this hamster wheel. And the second I get off it,

And I don't have someone living in my apartment and I'm not out partying or traveling.

I'm going to have to be alone and I'm going to have to sit with my feelings. And that is the most terrifying thing to me right now. And like, I'm just not ready for that at all. I just, I know once I decide to really deal with it and really go through the emotions, which you have to do, right? In order to heal from something, you have to allow yourself to feel that

I'm just like not fucking ready for that shit. I'm really not. And so until that day comes, I'm just going to keep doing what I'm doing. And I'm just not ready to deal with those really hard emotions. Okay? Thank you. Thank you.

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Your cash back really adds up. What's another update before we jump into this episode? Oh, my weekend. Fourth of July happened. You know what was actually crazier than what I did on the Fourth of July? I went to The Box on Saturday, I think it was. The Box has been around for a fucking while. I don't know if you guys know what that is. It's a

It's this club, but more so it's like a show. And I don't want to say freak show because I'm sure in some way, shape or form, that is not a correct way to talk about it. But it's just they do crazy ass shit at this place. Okay. I was there with all of my friends. They decided to take mushrooms. I did not because I know better. Allie's sitting in here fucking making a face right now.

But I knew better than to take shrooms and go to the box and see this crazy ass shit. Because when I say it's a show and it's a freak show and it's wild, there was a woman. She had beautiful fake tits, came out on stage. Great. Amazing. Then took the underwear off. There was a penis. Great. Amazing. Whatever. Then she proceeded to walk.

run around she was grabbing people's drinks throwing them at other people took the shit on stage it was it was fucking and they

they hand out popcorn you guys while this is happening like what the fuck but I heard it gets even crazier like one of my friends saw this girl suck off a horse until it like came in her mouth my other friend saw this woman who actually was in love with a goat genuinely was in love with a goat and thought her dead husband was in the go and they hooked up is this allowed I don't think this

This is like a loud whatsoever. PETA is going to fucking come and find me and kill me. I am just relaying the message, but I'm going to digress. And the 4th of July, it was a little more chill than the box. Let me just put it that way. Drinks. I had a hot dog. I had a hamburger. I listened to country music. And my version of country music is fucking Shania Twain and Toby Keith. Okay. And I know...

four songs total. I drank my body weight in rosé, as you do, which also I've gained five to eight pounds. And I'm really, really proud of myself because I was looking very scary there for a second. And I'm allowed to say I was looking scary and I was looking too skinny and unhealthy. I'm not saying skinny people look unhealthy. I'm saying for me and my body type, it was a little concerning. So I'm proud of myself for doing that.

But what I'm not proud of is the United States of America. And I was not celebrating them in any way, shape, or form. I was just celebrating my friends being on a boat and me gaining weight. Not you, America. Fuck off. Bye.

But you guys, I posted like a ton of shit over the weekend, especially on the 4th. And I was on a boat and I was with a man and I got a lot of fucking DMs from you guys asking me to spill the beans. Who are you dating, Sophia? Like, are you dating that guy? What's going on? You know what, people? All I'm going to

All I'm going to say is I'm having fun right now. Just because I post a guy or his family or something does not mean they are my boyfriend or I'm dating them. Okay? I used to be a different type of bitch. And if you've been following me for long enough, you know I used to say...

If I ever post a man on my social media, I have a gun to my head and he's forcing me to do it. And you will never fucking catch me doing that.

I have grown up and I've changed my mind and I'm at the point where I do not give a singular fuck about strategically posting on social media, okay? I'm going to operate on social media however the fuck I want, however unhinged that may be. Everyone needs to stop taking Instagram and taking TikTok, okay?

this fucking seriously. People get so upset or invested or whatever the fuck it may be on social media and I'm so over it. I'm done having anxiety over posting shit. I did that for long enough. I did that when I was trying to hide my ex-boyfriend and I'm not doing that shit anymore. And I think everyone should join me, okay? If I just met a guy and the same night...

I drunk post him. That's my prerogative and that has nothing to do with you and it doesn't mean anything. That could be my cousin. That could be someone I just met. That could be my husband maybe. It's not like any guy that shows up on my social media is my boyfriend, okay? This is another thing. If my friend sends me someone's story to look at and it's supposed to be a little low-key, okay?

I'm looking at that fucking story from my Instagram account, from my profile, the Finsta 5634 that I used to have and everyone used to have or probably still does. I don't give a fuck. I'm looking at your story from my account.

I just think like it's... If you're going to watch something, watch it with your chest and let that person know. If Instagram ever releases a feature where...

All of our Finstas are exposed, which they could do at any moment, which is really fucked up. Or what they're more likely to do is release a feature where you can see who's either watched your highlights. How about that? Take a screenshot. We took a screenshot. The screenshot? Yeah.

You know Instagram is going to fuck us and like release this feature. How embarrassed are you going to be? You're going to want to die. So I think you just need to own that shit. And if there's a girl and you don't really want her to know you're looking at her story, who cares? Like, fuck it. Like, really doesn't matter. So if you see me in your views or liking a photo from like 80 weeks ago, I did it willingly and I'm very aware of it.

Moving on to another little social media happening. Snapchat Plus. Do I use Snapchat? Fuck no. And I don't know anyone who does except my 18-year-old brother. Although I've heard through the grapevines people still use this shit. Yomi, do you? No. The only people my age that I know use Snapchat...

are because they have a bunch of side hoes. That's really the only reason why, or you're 18, or you're Chantel Jeffries. She talks about using it all the time. Shout out, Chantel. But besides that, I know no other person that uses it. But Snapchat is coming back from the dead, and they're coming out with this new feature called Snapchat+.

And this is not an ad, by the way, unless Snapchat wants it to be, which I don't think they do because I just said I don't fucking use it and no one I know uses it. But they came out with this new feature. It costs $3.99 a month. And I just want to break this shit down for you because it's actually very interesting. The first new feature is...

This thing called Ghost Trails, which is basically where if you're sharing your location on Snapchat, people can see where you've gone in the past 24 hours. Okay? So I don't know about you guys, but me and my closest friends, we all share our location with each other. But you can see their location at that moment in time. I can't see where they've been for the past fucking 24 hours. Okay?

So now when you're going to go fuck your piece of shit ex-boyfriend and you don't want your friends to know, you're not only going to have to turn off your location on iMessage, but now you're going to have to turn it off on Snapchat too. Which I think this is really the creepiest, most stalker feature available on a phone is to see where someone has been for the past 24 hours. Like, okay, just hire a camera crew and like a PI to follow this person. I

about to make this shit a requirement for all of my boyfriends to be active on Snapchat just so I can use this feature. They will not be able to find me on their Snapchat, though. I will never use that shit. Actually, I do think I have a Snapchat. I think I use it every like three weeks or so for some apparent reason. I wonder how many fucking followers I have on there. Probably not many. But okay, the next feature is...

Oh my god. The infamous best friend feature is coming back into play. Which, side note, do you guys remember how fucking chaotic...

MySpace was with the best friends feature. And you could literally have your top, I think it was like top six friends and you would move your friends around. Do we know how fucked up that is? Like, oh my God, this week, Sarah is going to be my number one. But then I hung out with Stephanie way more this past weekend. So like now she's number one and now Sarah and I are in a fight and she like doesn't even show up on there. That shit was fucking crazy.

although I do want to bring MySpace back and you have your song. I fucking miss that shit. But Snapchat is going to have a best friend list.

You can also get in a lot of trouble with this because if your side hoes show up and then your boyfriend sees it or you have multiple side hoes and they're seeing each other, you're kind of fucked. But to that, I just say fight for your fucking spot, honey. Weirdly enough, this new best friend list is...

It's not like how it used to be, though, because the astrology bitches have officially taken over because now it shows your list as the fucking solar system and everyone on your list is a planet. Right.

And I know that literally made zero sense. So let me fucking explain. So if Sarah is your number one best friend, she will be the planet that is closest to Earth. This really is some 18-year-old shit or some astrology shit. So...

Sarah will be the planet closest to you and you are the planet and so on and so on. This is so fucking extra and annoying. I don't know who approved of this idea. And yes, I just realized I said the planet closest to Earth because I have no idea what planet that is.

Saturn. It's got to be Saturn. I'm looking around the room right now and no one can help me. So I know it's not just me. I'm not fucking Bill Nye with the telescope. Leave me the fuck alone. Whatever planet is closest to Earth will be your friend, Sarah. I actually don't give a fuck.

I don't think anyone listening really does. So we're going to move on from the solar system. If you guys want to look into that, Wikipedia and Google will be your friend. The last thing about the best friends list is

that I think is actually extremely useful is you can now pin someone as your best friend to the number one spot, kind of like you could do on MySpace. So even if you don't really Snapchat each other like that,

It's still great because if you are cheating on your boyfriend via Snapchat, you don't need to worry about anyone taking his spot and him seeing it on your list because you have him pinned there. Because you always know where home is. Because Snapchat used to be the type of thing where whoever you were Snapchatting the most frequently would be at the top.

This is allowing you to pin that person. Now, if someone shows up as your number two, I don't know, you're gonna have to like come up with an excuse for that. So bottom line is, it's kind of this like MySpace shit coming back. I don't know, maybe it will like revive and revamp Snapchat, who fucking knows. But if you wanna pay $4 a month and get your fucking feelings hurt, absolutely download this shit. ♪♪

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Okay, so even though I just broke down this fucking HTML, CSS, codes of Snapchat, SEO, I'm just saying a bunch of random letters right now. It brings me to my final point, which is, like I said earlier, who the fuck is still using Snapchat? And why are you using it? And I know side hoes, we've established, we know why they use it. But who else uses this shit?

All I know is if I'm out at a bar or something and a guy has the audacity to ask me for my Snapchat of all things, it instantly shrivels up and dries up my vagina. And I'm like, you're two years old or you're shady as fuck and I'm done with you. Which is a great tip, by the way. Men, do not bring up your Snapchat if you're trying to talk to a girl and you're over the age of 18, all right? I'm pretty sure the CEO of Snapchat...

Isn't he like 30? He's like 30 something. He's 32. 32. Evan Spiegel.

The fact that his last name is Spiegel and he's ugly as fuck and he's dating Miranda Kerr is, I guess, money. Money speaks volumes, you guys. You know what? Maybe he's a really nice guy. I don't fucking know. I don't care. But Snapchat, you're scary and I would stay away from that shit unless you're just going to make your boyfriend have one so you can like check up on what he's doing, which is not healthy. Yeah.

Anyways, you guys, so that's my little social media rant. And now I think it's time to get into a little thing I like to call Sloot University. Sloot University.

Okay, that's the real info here. And I'm really excited to talk about this one because I was thinking about it a lot over this past weekend. Just hang out with my friends, hang out with this new guy or guys, plural. Okay, everyone back up. And I want to talk about the do's and don'ts

When it comes to managing your friendships once you enter a romantic relationship. And I don't hear a lot of people talk about this. Like this isn't something people really like discuss that much. Right.

And I think that we should because a lot of unnecessary bullshit comes along with this dynamic. Have you ever thought about your friendships and thought about how they are affected when you start dating someone new? Because you probably fucking haven't.

Because you're probably so far up each other's assholes that you haven't taken a second to breathe and look around the room and notice like, oh shit, I haven't been invited out to a girls night in three months. You probably haven't even noticed, right? Because you're like so entwined with this new guy. And I think we need to talk about that.

I mean, there's a lot of different things that come with the friendship dynamic and how it can change. But this is a big one is...

When you disappear, when you fucking Houdini all of your friends disappearing act, you're nowhere to be found because you just started talking to this new guy. And I'm talking heteronormatively. It could be a new guy. It could be a new girl. It could be anything at all. LGBTQ plus, whatever. But the second you get in a new relationship, you don't give a fuck about your friends. This is my number one deal.

don't when you start dating someone new. That's the first don't. Okay. On the flip side, I do just want to say that there needs to be an understanding on both sides of

Because if my best friend falls in love and wants to spend every second with this person, I'm not going to hold that shit against her. You know what I'm saying? I get it. I understand honeymoon phase, you're super in love. It's when it becomes a problem is when you are still neglecting the friendship and you're not nurturing the friendship properly.

six months into this shit or you're not there for me when I'm having a mental breakdown and I really need you because you're busy with your boyfriend. Like that's the shit that I won't put up with but I am super understanding if you are in love, love, love, love and you want to spend a lot of time with this new person, I'll support it. I'm only going to support it for so long, okay? Or

Once the honeymoon phase has worn off, if we're still not talking as much and we're still not hanging out and whatever, then we're going to have an issue. And this is where it's important that your new guy and friends get along, which can be extremely fucking tricky. Because maybe, I mean, there's so many reasons. Maybe your boyfriend hates you.

your friend because you guys used to get Eiffel Towered together and he thinks she's like a bad influence, right? Because you guys used to be fucking whores together. Okay? That's like one reason that I see all the time. Hi, me. I'm that friend. Do you know how many boyfriends have fucking hated me? Like, do you know how many? Not all of my friends, but there have been a lot of my friends' boyfriends who...

are not a fan. Okay? And I don't really blame them. I mean, I talk about being a whore all the time and cheating and whatever else, but...

They just need to get to know me, okay? Because I'm really not that bad. But I've dealt with this shit so fucking much. Or vice versa. Your friend hates your boyfriend, okay? And she wants him dead because he has no money and he's like mooching off of you. Whatever the reason is, this happens a lot where the friend and the boyfriend don't get along. You need to try to make it work, okay? Okay?

Let me just back up. You need to try to make it work, but I'm going to say this one thing, and this is probably an unpopular opinion. If my boyfriend doesn't like my friend, that's going to hold a lot less weight than if my friend doesn't like my boyfriend. And what I mean by that is...

I don't really give a fuck if my boyfriend has an issue with one of my friends. Like that's a non-issue. The boyfriend is getting downvoted. My friend, her opinion is more important to me than his. Why? Because she's been around my entire life. And even if she hasn't been around my entire life, we...

We just have a really close bond and she cares about me. So this new guy coming in like a bat out of hell trying to tell me he doesn't like my friend. Whoa there, buddy. Like fucking slow down. Downvoted. You just showed up to the party. Okay. My friends have been here. So you need to step aside. My friend doesn't like the guy I'm dating. Okay. So the flip of this is

That is a bigger issue to me for a ton of reasons. One being it's stressful as fuck because everything

Every time you want to go and do something, you have to fucking separate the two of them. Like they can't be in the same room. It's the most stressful shit. He gets mad if he sees you texting her. That's some like controlling shit, by the way. That would be like really crazy. But if you have to pick and choose between the two, that's super fucking hard. And the other reason why is if your friend –

Hates your boyfriend. And if you're anything like me and you really value your friend's opinion, you're going to start to question your fucking relationship. Like, maybe you shouldn't be with this dude. You know what I'm saying? I mean, I do that to a fault, honestly, and I will ask everyone for their opinion on every guy date. But...

You you need to hear your friend out and it's like your family. My friends are like family to me and so I expect that they want the best for me and if they're not feeling it and they're not liking him that's that's gonna be a fucking issue. There are certain situations though where your friend might just be a hating ass bitch and

And that's not me taking my boyfriend's side. That's not me being one of those girls who's like, oh my God, like my boyfriend is the number one person in my life. Like my friends are just jealous, blah, blah, blah, blah. That's not me saying that. There are certain times where I think your friends maybe just want you to themselves.

Or they want you to be single. I mean, I've seen this happen a lot when you and your friend were this crazy dynamic duo going out every single night.

as single gals and just tearing up the town. And then now all of a sudden your friend found a guy and you kind of panic a little bit. I've been that friend where my best friend who we were both single together got in a relationship and I was like, what the fuck am I doing every Saturday night? I totally feel that and I hear that. But you can't hold it against your friend. You know what I'm saying? So...

Those are some do's and don'ts. The biggest do, though, is you need to compromise. And I think the best way to compromise on this is to merge the two groups in your life. Because in reality, you should not be with a guy who hates your friends. And you should not be with a guy that all of your friends hate. But...

I think if you can, you need to bring the two groups together. And if you end up being with a guy who literally has nothing in common with any of your friends and you are a different person when you're with him, them, her versus with your friends, chances are the relationship is going to end. And that's another big red flag. It's kind of interesting to think about how –

Your friendships and how your friends view your boyfriend can be very, very telling about what the relationship is going to be like. If you are acting like fucking you love classical music and you don't take shots and you fucking want to wear like some conservative ass sweater, like,

because you're around your boyfriend and your friends are like, you were literally sucking a guy's dick in the bathroom stall in this club in San Francisco last week. That's like a red flag. Not that you should be sucking a guy's dick once you get a boyfriend, just so your friends still know you're the same bitch. But you guys know what I'm saying. Like your personality should not be changing based on this person. Even if he's the best guy ever,

If you have to lead a double life while you're in this relationship, there's a very little chance this is going to work out. So I want to wrap this up, this sweet university. But on some adult shit, this is the last thing I'm going to say is sometimes I wonder if losing friends is part of being in a serious relationship.

Especially as we get older. I think personally it's a yes and no type thing. I think that we naturally lose friends as we get older. I think that's just the way it goes. Your circle gets tighter. You're more exclusive, not in a fucking snobby way, but just in who you surround yourself with. I mean, I've talked about this before. Yeah.

You have your few like four lifers, okay? Your forever people. But you're not going to have the same 100 friends you were getting blackout drunk with every weekend that you had at 23 when you're 33. That's just, that's not realistic. Also, as you get older, you may want to be taking your relationship more seriously than when you were younger, okay? You're considering...

marriage, a house, kids, whatever it may be. And there's going to need to be a little bit more commitment involved in that than when you were just fucking a guy for fun or dating a guy for fun when you were like 26. That's just the way it goes. And I think...

You know, when you're getting serious and older, those types of binding things like buying a house, etc., they do require a level of closeness. But you never, ever, ever, ever, ever, and this is the biggest takeaway, want to completely lose yourself and close yourself off because you are in this relationship. Because then who's going to come to the wedding, right?

Who's going to come to the bachelorette? No, that's not it. But you guys know what I'm saying. Like, you know what's going to happen? This is the scariest outcome when you do that is A, you're just a horrible human being for letting your friends fall to the wayside. But more so, B scenario, you and your man break up.

Who's there? Who's there for you? Who's waiting for you? Who's going to take care of you? Who can you run to? No one except the guy who just broke up with you and now you can't talk to him. Okay, that doesn't sound that fun at all to me. So bottom line is the best thing is integration. It's also way more fun that way. Although I have been in a relationship where he was too social. So I...

always brought him around my friends and it was so much fun and I loved that until it wasn't because he ended up fucking a girl who was in our friend group. True story. I should tell that story one day. That's where the integrating isn't that much fun. But if you have good ass girlfriends by your side, that's obviously a non-issue and choose your partner wisely, okay? That's the fucking takeaway, you guys. ♪♪♪

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♪♪♪

Let's get into a little thing I like to call SOS, save our sleuths, questions, stories, advice. Let's fucking go. Question number one. Sophia, first of all, big fan of the pod and I absolutely fucking love you. Thanks, girlfriend. Second, on the podcast, you always talk about how you could get sex.

head for hours. But when I'm getting head, I get so in my head.

We all followed that, right? Okay, fine. Wondering what I taste like or smell like to this guy. Don't get me wrong. I'm an extremely hygienic person, especially when I know I'm going to be having sex. But I can't even enjoy head because I can't stop thinking about this. I've heard that there was some sort of pill or vitamin you can take that makes your pussy smell amazing and tastes like candy. Okay.

I was wondering if you could do some investigating slash detective shit and figure out if any sleuths use a product like this or if it even exists. Love you so much. Sincerely, Sleuty. Don't want to taste like booty. Okay, that was the best sign off I've ever fucking heard. I have a lot of shit to say about this.

First of all, no vagina tastes like candy. Okay? There's not like a Jolly Rancher pussy out there. That's just not a thing. So I don't feel it's necessary to start taking some pill for it to taste like a fucking sour – I was going to say sauerkraut –

I'm not saying we want to be like sauerkraut. I meant to say Sour Patch Kids. I don't think you need to take something for it to taste like candy. That's not natural. That's not what our vaginas are supposed to taste like. What they're supposed to taste like or smell like is whatever the fuck our body, pH balance, odor, whatever it is, is giving off. Okay? Okay?

Bottom line, I have so many women write this in scared about what they taste like, smell like, and you really need to knock it off with that shit. It's your body. It's your body's odor. And if you come across a guy and he's not into it for whatever fucking reason, which I find would be hard to come across, okay, unless you're dealing with

a little tiny bitch boy and he doesn't even, he's like barely eating pussy, then you don't want him eating your pussy. Or a bitch girl and she's eating your pussy and she's like, oh my God, it tastes like this, blah, blah, blah. You don't want them eating your pussy, okay? I'm just gonna start with that.

Yes, do I think you should take a shower and take care of your hygiene? 100%. As long as you're doing that, you are fine. You are good to go. If you feel there's really an odor, okay, then maybe you go to the doctor. But besides that, it has a taste and a smell, okay? They all do to a certain degree. So just keep that in mind. I am going to answer this question though because...

I feel like when people write in, they don't always want the healthy, mature response. My unhealthy answer here and what you're actually asking me

I have heard of taking chlorophyll supplements. I know they really help with BO. It's like an internal deodorant. And I didn't believe this was a thing until I was talking to my cousin. And she told me her BO is like 100 times less. Maybe you could look into that. But I haven't heard of a supplement that makes your pussy taste like a Jolly Rancher or a Tic Tac or a Kit Kat or whatever the fuck.

And we want to protect this guy from getting diabetes. So let's not do that. Okay, next question. Hi, Sophia. I have been secretly bisexual and fully accepted it last year and came out to my girlfriend that in the past I had hooked up with a person with a penis.

Yes, I gave them head and swallowed like a good slut and I really wanted to get fucked, but at the time was too scared to tell my girlfriend. Fast forward, my girlfriend fully supports me and does fuck me with a strap on and I love it.

I also love dominating her. She is definitely on the submissive side, and I believe our sex life has been amazing. Anyways, we both are monogamous and are not into opening the relationships.

The problem is that I have been consistently thinking about getting fucked and know I would love it because I came from just the strap on before. She did ask if I wanted to experiment when I came out to her and I genuinely didn't because I know she's the one and I do love fucking her. It took her some time to accept that I like fucking and being fucked and

and do love her pussy, but also like penis, but she's accepted it now. Anyways, part of me wants to open the relationship to same-sex partners, but that wouldn't be fair because she is straight, and I know it's selfish, but I could not handle her with another guy, and I know she wouldn't want me to be with another girl, nor do I even want to. I just don't know what to do. Any advice would be appreciated.

Okay, that was a fucking mouthful. So let me break that down. You have been dating this girl. You recently told her that you are bisexual and you have hooked up with men in the past. You like fucking. You like getting fucked. She is okay with it. She's cool with it. She fucks you with a strap on. It feels really great. Everything's amazing. But now...

You are maybe wanting to open the relationship only to the same sex is what I'm understanding. That sounds like a lot of work. That sounds like...

Holy shit. There's a lot of levels to this shit and a lot of fucking layers. A lot of hands. A lot of hands. A lot of strap-ons. A lot of different people. I don't even know. What I do know is this guy is saying he wants to open the relationship but could not handle her relationship.

with another guy but could handle her with another girl. Homeboy, you said that that's selfish. Yeah, that's fucking selfish. You can't say, oh, let's open the relationship but only to the same sex when your girlfriend is not attracted to the same sex. Like,

Like, like basically you're saying I'm going to do what I want to do and you're going to be stuck in the same fucking dynamic that we have. So I don't think that's fair. I think if you're really craving that and you want to get fucked by a guy, you just need to be honest with her.

I mean, cheating is not okay. And I don't think you should do that any longer. And I'm training my brain. So don't do that. Just be open about it with her.

And I mean, you can ask her, you can ask her, hey, have you ever been attracted to girls before? But if she's not, it's not fair for you to say, oh, we're in an open relationship, but can only fuck these types of people. Like, can you imagine if I said, oh, we can be in an open relationship, but like you can only fuck a guy with like a net worth of like 10 million or more. Like you can't like put those parameters around it, in my opinion. Why not? Why not?

Get us paid.

That's actually fucking true. Babe, I'm getting us fucking paid. What you can do, what you can do, and this is another alternative, is ask her if she's open to a threesome or a foursome. So it's not just completely you guys are doing this shit separately. It's like both of you guys. I've done that. And some of it, some of those hookups, three, a threesome, foursome, huge success. Some of them not so much, but it's something that you can try out 100%.

Okay. Next question. Hi, Sophia. This isn't a story, but I just had to defend my review leaving self. I

I am not a Karen and almost all of my reviews are just for my favorite places. But every once in a while, if I have a terrible experience, I feel like I need to leave a review. Hear me out. My reasoning is because I love to read reviews before I make any big changes. Like a hairstylist, hello, my hair is important. And I debate.

Thank you so much for watching.

Okay, this is in reference to me talking shit on people who leave Yelp reviews, Amazon reviews, any type of review.

It's yes, I talked shit on it because how do you have that amount of time on your hands? This is different. This is someone who had a terrible experience somewhere and is trying to protect the people. Hey, this is a fucking Batman type of situation, which I respect. However, I just don't think you should be allowed to leave a bad review behind.

to a restaurant, to something you purchased, blah, blah, blah, blah, unless you've had at least, and this is my new rule, two bad experiences. Because as someone who, I used to be a waitress,

I'm sure there were nights where I got blackout drunk on the job and gave the customer, the patron, the worst service of their entire life at this restaurant. And you know what? The restaurant should not be held accountable for my actions. So I just think you need to be careful when you leave a review. I've seen a lot of people leave a review and they're like,

people leave reviews for therapists and psychologists like just completely ruining their reputation that shit is wild and if they're horrible I get it but like there's people that are just out here with a vengeance so girlfriend I feel you if you got your hair destroyed I understand Twitter fingers turn to trigger fingers I probably would have done the same shit but I think you should maybe give them a second chance before you tell the world it's the worst place you've ever gone um

Oh my God, sleuths. This has been a very interesting fucking week for me. My 30th birthday is coming up. I'm a little bit nervous, but we're going to talk about that more next week. I am also leaving for Italy, but I will have an episode for you guys. And with that, you can follow me, Sophia Franklin. Sophia is an F.

franklin with a y on all social media except tiktok there is the number zero at the end and i love you guys so much let's talk next week bye