2: MILFHUNTER 36:07

If you guys haven't noticed, I haven't had a new merch drop in a minute, but that is all about to change very, very soon. What you guys don't see is the madness behind the scenes and what shipping merch out really looks like.

Making sure you guys are receiving your items on time is beyond important to me and those that run businesses know exactly how stressful it can be. There's a reason why everybody uses ShipStation. ShipStation has made my life so much easier. I love being able to automate shipping tasks and manage orders in one simple dashboard and even print shipping labels with just the click of a button.

I am able to save thousands of shipping costs with discounts of up to 89%, you guys. And that's off DHL, UPS, and USPS rates.

So work less and ship more with ShipStation, the innovative tool that helps turn your shipping challenges into opportunities for growth. Go to ShipStation.com and use code SOFIA to sign up for your free 60-day trial. That's ShipStation.com, code SOFIA. ♪

Hi, everybody. I really was not planning on bringing him on, but things changed very quickly. I have a very special guest, the most requested guest. His name is Soup Man. Soup Man. I'm kidding. His name is Milf Hunter. We have Milf Hunter on.

Hi, MILF Hunter. Hello. So if you heard my last episode, you already know who he is. But now he's coming on as one of my best friends. I can say that honestly. Which is the biggest plot twist in podcasting history. And I want to talk about the name MILF Hunter just quickly. Because I think MILF Hunter, for new people, they're like, what the fuck is a MILF Hunter? Yeah.

It was kind of this persona or character that was supposed to convey the male perspective. Do you agree with that? Yeah, I agree with that. And the character was like this quintessential fuck boy type thing. And it played into the manipulative tactics of my old show. What do you think about the name now? That shit is cringy as fuck. It's cringy as hell, man. I like...

I look at it and it's just, ugh. In fact, I always take this time to completely disassociate from this exaggerated persona that fit into a narrative for a show. Completely disassociate from it. Completely, 100%. I mean, is it now knowing me, is it indicative of me? No, it's not. I can say that honestly, it's really not. Okay. Kind of.

No, it's not. It's not. Yeah, it was like a very exaggerated thing. Yeah. And it did well. It did. So can we tell people where the fuck we are right now? I don't even really know where we are. We're in your mom's closet in Salt Lake City, Utah, in the mountains. I'm in the middle of fucking nowhere. I've been baptized three times. Like,

This place is a made-up place. Yeah, I don't feel comfortable. I know I just said you're my best friend, but like... I don't trust you! You have my brother's phone number. You're like having hour-long conversations with my mom and I don't like it. I know, I get treated very well in this house. So...

We have gotten very close over the past few months. We have been like a really integral part in each other's healing. Essential. Essential. Yes. And we had very, very similar things happen to us. Like, damn, you're identical things. Oh, yeah. I mean, we really bonded over. They're going to think we're hooking up.

I'm fucking out of your league. Are you kidding? Please, I would stiff arm you if you came close to me. We're not hooking up, I can assure you. Promise. But for new people listening, what did happen to you? Because people know what happened to me. What happened to you? You're like, where the fuck do I start? I mean, long story short, I'm a kid from nothing. And I conceptualized the number one podcast in the world and I wasn't compensated. Yeah. Yeah.

Yes. I mean, is that accurate? Yes, it is. And...

I think we were both betrayed. I'm not making it about me. I'm just letting people know. We were both betrayed by the same person. And then we both had a very messy exit from the same company. Mine was obviously on a bigger scale. Yeah, slightly bigger scale. Just millions of people. Yes. And we're not going to get into that because I really do want to focus on your experience and how you felt. Yeah.

When everything went down. Sheesh. I mean, I don't think I felt anything different than anybody else who's gone through some traumatic shit. You know, like you feel everything. You feel every emotion. You know, I went through hurt and...

I was insecure. I developed these uncontrollable trust issues. People I had been close to since childhood, like best friends, I started to just irrationally question. I just became completely inaccessible. I just disappeared. I did the exact same shit. My trust issues were bad. Now it's like...

I'm questioning, like, my mother and my grandma. I'm like, what the fuck are you guys up to? But really, I...

My trust issues are insane. I feel like I'm very paranoid now. I think there are some positives that came out of it. I'm not going to lie. Definitely. Definitely. I mean, that's how you're... That is the best case scenario of handling trauma is finding, you know, sifting through all of the rubble and finding the positives. Right. Right. Which it's kind of interesting that we're sitting in here right now because...

Why do we even trust each other at all? I don't trust you. I don't know. No, I think to be honest for me personally, I started trusting you the first hour that I was like in Utah and you told me you smoked crack. Oh,

Oh my God. That's the greatest story I ever heard. It's the greatest story. For everybody listening, they're going to think like I hit rock bottom and I'm like smoking crack cocaine now. Context is key here. Context is key. This was something that happened 10 years ago. We're not getting into it. Thank you. Thank you for putting me on the spot. My apologies. My apologies. But look though, do you know why you trust me?

That's a really good question. I didn't know that you were about to turn shit around. But I know why you trust me. What? That day in your apartment. Right. You were sitting at the kitchen bar. Coop was in the corner on the high chair. And I was in the living room screaming, sobbing, crying, looking at you, telling you,

You're next. She's going to fuck you next. I'm the first person. I'm the first person who told you.

Oh my God. That shit is so crazy. Wait, but isn't that why you trust me though? Yes. That look in my eyes? Yes. That was the most defining moment. I think shit started to change from there. But that's not even why we're here. In a way. We don't even have to relive that. Yes. Yes. We're not even going there. We're not doing that. I don't think either of us want to even relive that scene. No. No, I don't want to. We're just adding context. And I think it's safe to say we both went through traumatic stuff and...

And that's actually been one of the most requested questions from people is how did you pull yourself out of it? Like an extremely dark time. Oh, man. You just keep asking me tough question after tough question. I think actually, I think I speak for like both of us and correct me if I'm wrong, but we're both not fully out of that place. I am not out of that place at all.

At all. At all, you know? I wish I could get on this microphone and say, everyone, I am fucking good. We're good to go. Like, I've completely overcome it. I've made strides. I'm so much better, but I'm not out of it by any means. No, yeah, I agree. I agree. We were supposed to sit here two days ago to record, and we ended up spending 48 hours doing, like, intensive therapy. Yeah, I mean, the...

No, I, yeah, yeah. Really, I really had like my first ever therapy sessions in Utah and the mountains in your mom's closet. No, 100%. I think that, I think that if I had to like, you know, talk about, if I had to describe my journey out of this dark place, like,

Well, first let me address, there's a huge misconception that there's like some blueprint or some guidebook to how you're supposed to do this shit. Great point. No, no, that does not exist. I would say that, you know,

moving out of this place and progressing and growing, it comes for me, it came from like this internal confidence that that day and that feeling where like I'm going to wake up and be like, okay, this is the day where I'm better. This is the day where I feel like myself. That day doesn't come.

And you have to just have this internal confidence that you're going to take a step forward to growing. And, you know, the world could fall from right underneath you, but no matter what, you're still going to take that step. And I think you just convince yourself every day kind of to take another step. And I think that's how you start moving out of that dark place. That just spoke to my soul. Thank you.

Because I think when everything was at its darkest, lowest moments, I kind of just went on autopilot and I just kept telling myself, just move forward. Just move forward. Just keep, you know. You are a fighter. I remember those like conversations and, and.

And in that moment, I was broken and I talked to you and the way that you spoke, you sounded so confident. You were such a fighter. You were like full of resilience. And I remember being like in awe, like, wow, why am I not there? You know, like, why do I not feel like that? Yeah. Yeah.

Well, it's funny that you say that because I think I came off that way, but internally I did not feel like a fighter whatsoever. And that's not really me. You know my personality by now. I'm not really that person. See, I disagree. I think like...

I think you're just like self-deprecating, like your humor as well. It's a reflection of it. I think that you just don't give yourself credit that you are that person. And I think a lot of people, especially women and especially in quarantine in the setting that we're in, have trouble giving themselves credit and like rationalizing it and making it feel tangible. And that's another thing that I want to talk about is the time that we're in quarantine and what it does. I know everybody talks about this, but I don't care. Like this is this shit is real. It is.

It totally is. I think quarantine, I think just to back up, you said like as a woman, women are way more self-critical. Yes. Ten times. Yes, I agree. And I think quarantine, we are all...

sitting at home, not getting outside. Maybe that's just me because I know you can go outside. Oh my God. But we do just have way more time on our hands to self-reflect and think about things that we don't have outside distractions to like really run to. And

So everything is amplified, your anxiety, your sadness, your depression, your self-doubt, your negative self-talk. It's amplified. Yeah. And everybody handles their trauma and their troubles differently. I think the vast majority of my friends kind of have something happen in their lives and they don't handle it right then and there at that moment. They kind of like

Right.

You know, you're just taking, you know, depression, anxiety, stress, self-doubt, and you're trapped in a room with it and you're drowning in it. Yeah. And it is fucking hard. It is. It's really hard. It is really fucking hard for everyone. For everyone. Even if you didn't go through something traumatic like this in itself...

is hard shit. But I love how people are like, how did you pull yourself out of it? And we just spent the last five minutes being like, what to help us? Throw me a fucking life vest, please. We can't help you. We need you guys to help us. No, I think, yes, though, I think just forcing yourself to take, even if they're baby steps, just keep moving forward because it does get better. It does. And

I kind of what are some tangible things that.

Well, I can only speak from, I can just speak from experience. I was really rock bottom broken. And I sat one day and I just made a two hour playlist full of, you know, every type of song you can think of. Breakup songs, revenge songs, anger, hurt, motivation. And I would just, I downloaded the Nike running app. And this is not a fucking ad. Enjoy the free press though. But, and I just kind of hit play on that song.

on that playlist and I just ran and I would really like be crying running in my old hometown and I wouldn't even see other people or cars or anything. I was just like tunnel vision. I had like blinders on and I would just run every day and I was so out of shape from like being depressed and locked in a room for a couple months and

that when all that kind of happened and you wake up from your first workout in months and you're sore as fuck. And I kind of relished in that pain because it made me feel like I can feel something. It was kind of the first tangible feeling I had that wasn't consumed by emotion. I am the least athletic human being on planet Earth. I know. I watch you drop everything I throw at you. I...

I actually kind of started doing the same thing. It was more I thought I was going to go for a walk. I would have my playlist. That's so funny that you said revenge songs because I would have that shit. But the funny thing is, is they were all songs about relationship breakups. But I would just talk about them in my head like they were a friendship breakup. I

I just feel like such a loser talking about this. But it's real though. It is. It's real. And it's sad that like we almost feel embarrassing talking about these things because these are not normal topics. Right. You know what I'm saying? These aren't things that get discussed, let alone thoroughly. Right. And I would be going for a walk

and then I would end up running because I'd be like so overcome with emotion and I would just start running. So I actually did something similar. Yeah. And the comedown from those emotions is crazy, right? Yeah. Is it worse than the comedown from crack? Tell the story. Do I just like... Tell the story. Okay. Please, please. I fucking hate you. This shit is cold. I'm going to go ahead and tell this story quickly because...

Here we go. I really have no other idea how to get into this story. But basically, I was 19 years old and I can't even fucking say this. Judgment free zone. Can we just all establish judgment free zone? I do not condone drug use. In fact, this is like a cautionary tale for real. Educational. Yes, it really, really is.

So I'm 19 or 20. I can't remember. And my friend, I wish I could say her name so bad. She's a great storytelling name. Do you think she wants a shout out? We'll call her Jennifer Calloway. Jennifer Calloway. Great name. So she invites me up to her apartment. And I don't even think it was like her apartment. It was like her man's place or a crack tent. Yeah.

I don't remember. But she invites me upstairs. She invites me upstairs and asks me, do you just want to hang out for a little bit? We can do blow, which I was a fucked up teenager. I had done blow before. So let me just like establish that. So I was like, cool, great. Let's let's do it. Then things changed quickly because she hands me aluminum foil and

And that's pretty much it. And I, being completely stupid but also having, like, some idea, I asked her, I remember saying, why can't we just snort this shit like we're used to? Like, I've been to parties with you. We just always snort it. Why are we doing this whole production? What is the aluminum foil for? Yeah.

And I remember she said, it will just hit really, really good and different. And that was like enough to get me on it. She said that. And then she also said, yeah, like I had to add baking soda. Whatever she said, I fell for it. I didn't understand that all of a sudden Coke becomes crack just because you're smoking it. Like I did not realize the chemical compound was

completely changes. Do you know what I'm saying? No, I understand. This shit is fucking funny. But then I... Wait, though. What was her tone like? Was she aggressive? No. That's the thing, though. She made it feel so comfortable. I remember she said... Cozy crack. Yeah. She said, I will hold the tinfoil for you once...

All you have to do is use this straw and suck up all of the smoke because the substance will travel across the tinfoil. It leaves like a black trail. And I sucked up all of the fucking smoke. And the chemical compound does fucking change. And that shit does hit way different. Because I proceeded to do it for three hours. Wait, what? Three hours.

Yo, you did not tell me that part. Yes. I did this shit for three hours and it was the best fucking thing I've ever experienced.

I'm kidding. I'm kidding. It actually was not that great. How so? Because to be completely honest, I felt I needed to do more, but the actual high was not that cool. I was literally chasing the dragon. When people say that, I've never understood until this moment.

So I yes, I know that I started to act like a full blown crackhead because she sat me down and she said, hey, I really think we need to chill for a second. Like, let's calm down after three hours. Yes. Then and I think this is the funniest part.

She sits me down. She says, let's both calm down for a minute. She hands me another sheet of tinfoil. And I was thinking in my head, I hope this is more crap. I'm kidding. But I probably was at that moment. At 19, probably not. She hands me another sheet of tinfoil and she says, smoke this. This will calm you down immediately. It was heroin. Oh.

What did it look like? What did it look like? I don't even remember. But it was a completely different color from what I was smoking. So she hands it to me. And the reason this is funny, because that's not funny so far, I acted disgusted. I was... I remember...

Acting like I am so appalled, Jennifer, that you would even put this in my face. I am not that type of bitch. I would never do that type of thing. Disgusted. After I had just done crack cocaine for three hours. Like, what?

The audacity. The audacity. The audacity. The fuck were you thinking, Jennifer? No, seriously, though. I just drug shamed her after I had just done that shit. But that just proves my point. I had no idea. I thought in my head I was doing coke. Which is worse, heroin, crack, coke? I don't know. Please just turn this mic off. Okay. That's pretty much the story. I guess...

The only thing I would add is I should have fucking known. I should have known because a week prior to that, this girl did my hair.

She was a hairstylist. Actually, I think she was like in hair school, but she did my hair. I was putting extensions in my head, which for those of you that have had extensions, you like completely will understand what I'm about to say. She charged me $2,000. Oh my God. If you're getting the best hair, best everything, it's like one something. She charged me 2K.

She put in my head Sally's hair extension. Like, Amazon Prime, $200 worth of hair in my head. And I probably needed, like, seven tracks. She gave me three. Like, she completely... The whole thing was $400 maybe. I will say the comedown is the worst thing I've ever experienced ever. Ever. Like...

I've gone through some really dark times. I remember I went to the gas station after, called my boyfriend at the time, and I said, please come pick me up because I am thinking about killing myself. Oh, which I'm laughing. I'm not trying to laugh. No, I know. But that's how fucked up it was. I have done drugs since then. No come down even compares in the slightest. So,

So don't do crack. That is the worst comedown you've ever experienced. So that makes the drama look like nothing. That's why you were so strong on the phone. This bitch is superwoman. That's why. And that is how I trusted you. Yes. Great. So that's the story. Oh, my God. Bravo. Bravo. I hate you for making me tell that. Can we please move on? Yes.

We are in a cost of living crisis, people, and everyone knows I am the queen of finding ways to save money. And that applies to my retail therapy as well. Rakuten is going to help you save money, period. I mean, it already has for me, so why wouldn't it for you?

It's the smartest way to save money when you shop because you earn cash back at over 3,500 stores. My personal favorites are Sephora, Saks Fifth Avenue, Wine.com, but I've also earned cash back on trips I've taken, home appliances, and even dining out with friends. It's truly the gift that keeps on giving and the membership is free.

And it's beyond easy to sign up for. So there's really no excuse. Cashback is deposited directly into your PayPal account or Rakuten can send you a check. Whatever way you prefer. Get the Rakuten app now and join the 17 million members who are already saving. Cashback rates change daily. See Rakuten.com for details. That's R-A-K-U-T-E-N-K.

Your cash back really adds up.

As a parent, you want to set your child up for success. So when they're struggling in school or they need help with homework, you try your best to step up. But sometimes you might not be equipped to answer. And it's better to leave that to the experts from IXL Learning. IXL Learning is an online learning program for kids. It covers math, language arts, science, and social studies. IXL is designed to help them really understand and master topics in a fun way with positive feedback. Powered by advanced algorithms, IXL gives the right help to each kid.

So don't wait any longer. Make an impact on your child's learning. Get IXL now.

Okay, so can we please move on to listener questions stories?

We have a male perspective, which I think is really important. Kind of. Kind of. Or hindering. Or the opposite. Definitely subjective. Yes. Because men are garbage. Basura.

But Suna. Okay. The shoplifting stories. I talked about it a little bit last episode, all the shoplifting I would do. I got so many fucking submissions about this. You guys are all little shoplifters. Love. Something that I just quickly want to point out that I found so interesting. Every single story...

People were talking about stealing trash. And by trash, I mean cheap-ass shit, which is what my story was. I would only steal shit that was like $10 or less. And every single story was the exact same. The adrenaline rush. I guess. I don't know. Not one person was like, I stole designer jeans, nothing. Okay.

What? What?

shoplifting story I stole from Claire's like a million times. She was 11. 11. Wait, so she has a record at 11? Yes. That's like a savage preteens that were in your comments. Honestly, the fact that Claire's decided to press charges against an 11-year-old is

I'm glad I stole all the shit I did from that. Yeah, and $500 too? Yes. I don't think anybody spends $500 like Claire's in their life. No, but that's the thing. Whatever you're stealing, the amount doesn't matter. You still get the same charge. Okay, moving on. So I just want to quickly just get the personal questions out of the way. The number one question, my relationship status. Okay.

I am not ready to talk about that. And I know that's like frustrating or whatever else. I just had everything I care about taken from me and I'm not fully healed and I'm just not ready to dive into that. I have to be completely honest. I will. I absolutely will.

But for right now, no. I know these are personal questions in my perspective and comments on them are completely irrelevant and meaningless. But if I were you, yeah, I would never, ever, ever speak about my personal relationships on a platform again. Ever. I know that's true, but I absolutely will be. Okay, another question about me and then we can move on.

is am I planning on staying in Utah or do I think I will move back to New York? I can't even think about moving right now because of this pandemic. I do plan to go back to New York, but TBD on the date, but I will not be living in Utah. I was about to talk shit again. I love Utah. I'm not doing that. I love it here, but yes, I will move back.

This girl wrote in, long story short, my ex and I dated for two years, then broke up. His older brother hit me up and asked me out. Oh, my God. And we have been dating for a year plus. What? His family doesn't know at all. How do we mention our relationship to his family? Parentheses, I would be reintroducing myself again. R.I.P. I kind of love her. Oh.

Okay. Wait, can I just give my first initial thought? My first initial thought from the big brother scooping up the little brother's ex-girlfriend of two years is that the little brother has won every single backyard sporting event since they were fucking children. Okay, this is what I'll say. If your older brother felt comfortable enough to be dating you after his little brother was

That's not that is not on you anymore at all. Reintroduce yourself to the family. Hi, you guys know me. You've met me before. LOL. I'm back in a different fashion, different fashion, different dick, different brother. Oh, my goodness. That's the only way to do it. Yeah. I look at this scenario like.

Does the I have I don't have any advice. I have questions. Does the little brother know? I will make sure to ask her. But right now I can't. Yeah, I guess if I had to give advice, it would be.

Walk into that house like you own it. Like you pay mortgage. Their DNA pool is clearly infatuated with you. Yes. Yeah. The DNA pool cannot help themselves. Yeah. Hit up the dad next. There's no boundaries. Holy Trinity. There's no boundaries. Okay. Milf Hunter, these were targeted at you. Oh, targeted. I know. Oh my God.

These were written in trying to get the male perspective. Okay, much better. Okay, so number one. This girl wrote in saying, I'm going to go on a trip with a guy. How should we split the cost of everything? You do not split the cost. He pays for all of it. Um, damn.

Pre-relationship me, I say 50-50. Split it. Post-relationship me with some clarity, with an IQ above the piece of celery, the man takes care of it. Really? Yeah, without a doubt. No hesitation. Okay, so back in the day, it was like 50-50. Now that you've experienced love...

And a little bit of money. I think the financial situation is always relevant. Very true. If you love somebody, you should naturally be aware of their financial situation and what they're going through. And if it's within their means, you should never put your partner in a situation where they are out of their means. Very good point. See, that is the advice that we give on the show. Okay. What do men think of a girl if she fucks on the first date? Yeah.

Once again, immature young me, 21 year old me, CHD me, uh, slut, whore. Oh my God. Ew. Mature me with brain cells that function. Um,

We're grown. I feel like if you really like somebody, if you really have a connection, you can't fake that. And if you really have a connection with somebody, if you really can communicate on multiple levels with them emotionally, physically, that generally leads to sex and generally leads to good sex. Right. So, I mean, now I have no issue at all. I would date a girl I fucked the first time I hung out with her or dated her or whatever. It all just depends on the chemistry. I think that's exactly what everyone needs to hear. Yeah.

You're not judging a girl if she does that. Save on Cox Internet when you add Cox Mobile and get fiber-powered internet at home and unbeatable 5G reliability on the go. So whether you're playing a game at home or attending one live,

You can do more without spending more. Learn how to save at Cox.com slash internet. Cox Internet is connected to the premises via coaxial cable. Cox Mobile runs on the network with unbeatable 5G reliability as measured by UCLA LLC in the U.S. to age 2023. Results may vary, not an endorsement. Other restrictions apply.

Knowing how to speak and understand a new language can be an invaluable tool when traveling, meeting new friends, or just even to master a new skill. But it's not always simple when you're bogged down by textbooks and structure classes. That's why so many people trust Rosetta Stone. Rosetta Stone is the most trusted language learning program available on desktop or as an app.

It truly immerses you in the language you want to learn, like Spanish, French, Italian, Chinese, and more. You won't just be studying English translations. The Rosetta Stone intuitive process helps you pick up a language naturally, first with words, then phrases, then sentences. Don't put off learning that language.

Okay, that's it. What a fucking wild ride.

I want to say thank you so much to every single person listening, everyone that tuned in last week. We went number one, not to brag, but it was kind of a big deal. I love you guys so much. The only thing I want to say, aside from subscribe, rate me five stars, follow me on social media.

I'm such a piece of shit. Besides all of those things, go vote. That is the most important thing. Please. Registration, I'm pretty sure, is up. Now is the time to actually vote. Please do it. Your voice matters. And I have merchandise also. And it's actually fucking amazing. The quality is amazing. The fit, amazing. I'm amazing. Oh my god, I would want to die. That's it. I love you guys so much. And I will see you next week.