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Hey everybody, I guess I'm back. Let's get this shit over with. Wow, I am so welcoming. My name is Sophia Franklin. It's Sophia spelled with an F and then to be completely obnoxious, Franklin spelled with a Y. I'm recording from my mom's closet. This is what shit has come down to. What a disgrace. And it's the first time that I've sat in front of a microphone in months.
because some fucked up shit went down. But I have to say it feels so, so good to finally be back. For new listeners, please bear with me during this intro because I will explain everything. This is a brand new show. So if I could please ask for you guys listening to please subscribe, subscribe, subscribe. God, I'm so desperate.
I am recording this solo, so if I refer to myself in third person, please bear with me. Let me go ahead and give you a little bit of background as to how I got here. So a few years ago, I moved to New York City not knowing anybody, and I was working in finance, which I fucking hated. I despised. I would fantasize about getting hit by a car just so I would not have to go into work the next day. Is that fucked up to say?
whatever. I feel like a lot of people can relate. So about six months in, I was looking for a new apartment and I needed a roommate because I was broke. And by complete random chance, this girl I had met in like an Uber pool or something, she told me that she knew of someone looking for a place also. So I met up with this complete rando to look at an apartment and
And it was at that very moment, which I obviously didn't know at the time, my life was about to completely change. I signed a lease that very day. We became instant best friends. We were inseparable. We did everything together. She was like family to me. And then before I knew it, I quit my job in finance and we started a show together and
And after just four episodes, we signed a deal with a huge media company and it was a fucking hit. It shot up the charts. It got to a point where we couldn't even go outside without getting recognized. Ew. I just sounded so cringy right there. I promise you, I do not think I'm some type of celebrity like ducking TMZ big sunglasses. I'm just trying to put into perspective how big. So life was fucking amazing.
Until it wasn't. Now, ideally, I would never talk about this shit ever. It's just not my personality and it's just not my character. But because of the complete character assassination that happened to me on such a massive scale, I was really left with no choice. I was forced to do this. I have spared you bitches. And the gloves are coming off.
So about four months ago, in true 2020 fashion, I lost my best friend, I lost my show, and I lost my career virtually overnight. And not only that, but I became the subject of a very public, very aggressive smear campaign where I was publicly attacked, bullied, and humiliated for months to millions of people.
I was labeled as greedy, lazy, submissive, all types of shit. Just check out my Instagram bio. You will see it all there with a shooting star emoji. Iconic. So at this point, you guys are probably like, bitch, what did you do? What did you do, bitch? I'm going to tell you. At a very, very basic level, what happened is we were renegotiating our contract and
And during this renegotiation, there were some real problems happening behind the scenes, both in business and in friendship. And I want to first start with business, which I know as a woman, it is not my place to talk about business. But if you will please allow me to. Now, for legal reasons, let's just speak in hypotheticals. And my apologies if this is wordy, but it's actually quite simple.
Let's discuss this made-up alternate universe, and in this world, there is a big show that makes $10 million a year on the low end, most likely more. And I, being that I am worthless and replaceable piece of shit, was taking home about 4% of that.
Now, to put this into perspective, podcasts of that magnitude, for the most part, make 70 to 80% of their profits. There is an industry standard like there is in any fucking industry, and we were making far below that. Everyone knew it. Our employers knew it. Our co-workers knew it. Our agents and lawyers knew it.
Now, to everyone listening, I want to ask you a question, and let's really put our thinking caps on. If a man walked into his boss's office requesting to be fairly compensated, would he be labeled as greedy? Really chew on that for a second. No, he wouldn't. He would be labeled as a knowledgeable businessman, not a greedy, ungrateful bitch.
But seriously, if it makes me greedy that I knew I deserved more than 4% for a show that I not only poured my heart and soul into, but exposed every intricate detail about my mental, emotional, and sex life on a weekly basis...
then you can kindly call me the greediest fucking bitch to walk planet Earth. Seriously. Bury me with my Polly Pocket playset and my Barbies and the one Chanel bag I own because I am taking all of that shit with me. I know my worth.
Ladies, never let a man or anyone bully you into thinking you deserve less. Never let another woman twist a narrative because they were too weak to stand up for themselves.
If you are in a situation where you feel your time, energy, mental, and emotional investment is being compromised or not compensated, do not stay there. Because let me tell you something, society and men and those that bow down to them will try to convince you that you are being crazy and that you are being greedy. Fuck them. Now let's talk about the friendship.
And actually, I'm going to talk directly to you, Alex. You were my best friend. You knew what I went through with depression. You knew what I went through with mental health. And you enabled an enormous media conglomerate to completely destroy my life. In fact, you participated in it. You
profited from it. For someone who advocates for therapy, your mother who is referenced endlessly, a licensed therapist, you still have the audacity to enable an entire hate campaign towards someone who has helped you in your lowest moments. If the roles are reversed, and I have thought about this a million times, I could have never done that to you. Ever.
I just want everyone to know this because you have been lied to. Even after everything, I still tried to make things work. I reached out to you numerous times to salvage what we had and you left me on read. May 20th, 12-11, read. May 25th, 11-58, read.
It was never about the money. It was never about the deal points. It was never about the IP. It was about who you are as a human being. You wanted the spotlight. This isn't even the first time you tried to get me kicked off the show. And you know what I'm talking about.
I know exactly at what point we stopped being friends. In fact, I can tell you the exact date and time. This is the last conversation we ever had. And I'm going to read it to you word for word. April 30th, 1029 a.m.
You lied relentlessly for 14 months about a side deal you did behind my back with Barstool to me and others, including our own shared attorney. This is exactly the type of behavior that has cost you your best friends one after the other over the years.
You will probably be too defensive to hear this, but I am going to say it anyway. I add more value through my creativity than all of your editing hours combined. My value is more than 50%. Your skills are menial. Mine are intangible. Your humor is written by others you betray, like your supposed former best friend, MILF Hunter. My humor is my own. To
To say you do more than me is a fucking joke and that you are so insecure about your talent that you want to measure yourself in editing hours and social media posts would be laughable if I didn't find it so pathetic. I don't care about the money. I care about the lying. And that's where you and I differ. End text message.
Not only did you lie to my face about making more money, you justified it to millions of people by saying you did more work than me. Alex, did you do more work? You convinced everyone you did the heavy lifting, right?
You painted me as a lazy, unambitious puppet. But who are you? I saw you throw away MILF Hunter, your best friend of 12 years, for a couple thousand dollars.
and he made you. He created you. Your jokes, your segments, your stories, your tweets, your Instagram comments, and captions were all him, and you wouldn't even give him a dime for years. It's hilarious. You are the self-crowned Gluck Gluck Queen. Bitch, that crown is plastic. It is not real, and neither are you.
We couldn't even go into the recording studio until you received your script. Why couldn't we do a live show? Why couldn't we do video? Because you read off of a script. Are we all seeing the delusion now? I thought you could handle the editing considering you didn't write your own material and you had a ghostwriter the entire time. The editing is the least you could have done. Fucking Spielberg.
I wrote all of my own shit. We are not the same. You are a master manipulator. You effortlessly lied to millions of people. It's scary. All you care about is getting famous and you don't care about who you need to step over to get there. There were four people who built that show. Isn't it interesting how you are the only one left? Because you ruthlessly cut out all three of us.
You would fuck over anyone, your own mother, to get a blue checkmark on Instagram. The difference between us is I am honest about every battle I face. You can't even look in the mirror. And I know you can't keep my name out of your mouth, but please keep my fucking jokes out of your mouth. I want to make something very clear.
No one is to blame for Alex and I's falling out apart from the two of us. No boyfriend, and no man for that matter, has ever made a decision on my behalf. I make all of my own decisions. I am the daughter of a single immigrant mother. Independence has literally been rooted in me since birth. Again, we are not the same.
You guys heard me pour my heart out on that show for two years. If you thought for even a second I would let a man come between me and my friendships or my business, then you weren't listening. You really were not listening. And believing a man has to help a woman to think for herself is misogyny 101 and I'm just not doing it anymore. I want to wrap this up.
And I already know that my ex-best friend and former employer, the dynamic duo that they are, have their loyal group of minions ready to unleash, have everyone sitting in the office already crafting stupid-ass memes about me and shitty quality t-shirts. Keep them. I will never acknowledge your existence ever again. I am going to let you have the last word.
You guys collectively tried to destroy not only my career and my reputation and me as a person, but it was designed to ruin the trust I had built with my listeners over the years so that the show could still succeed without me. It was a very calculated business plan. Nice try.
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Okay, moving on.
Holy shit, that was exhausting. I do not like feeling like that. Those last 20 minutes were just not me, not my personality at all, but it had to be done. Thank God it's over. I feel like I can finally be myself and start my show. So I guess I should start by letting you all know where the fuck I've been hiding.
I am back in my hometown, Salt Lake City, Utah. I fled New York when everything went to shit. And I did what any mature adult would do in a time of panic. I ran home to my mom's house like a grown up. And coming back here after living in New York for three to four years really gave me a new perspective of where I grew up.
I am really a small-town bitch, kind of. So initially, I wanted to talk about the emotional toll and trauma I experienced. I could really spend hours, more like fucking days, talking about it. I'm sure I will in the future, but I also realize so many people are suffering right now. And in the grand scheme of things, this shit is just not that important.
I'm not that important. All I will say about it is I spent a lot of weeks bedridden, crying, anxious. Wow, that is the understatement of the century. Scared. You guys get the deal. It is not particularly fun having thousands of people sending you step-by-step instructions on how to kill yourself.
Which I must actually be lazy because I did not go through with it. Please forgive me. You just have to laugh through the pain sometimes. You know what I'm saying? But damn, the preteens are mean as shit. Like, seriously, that is a ruthless demographic.
It's just cyberbullying is crazy. It really is bewildering to me. I would never feel the need to write hate on someone's social media. Please do not engage in cyberbullying on my behalf. I did not stay silent and spend months rebuilding myself to come back and enable another hate campaign. All right, let's focus. What is this show going to be about? I have no fucking clue.
You guys tell me. You guys let me know. But really, I want to get your guys' feedback. Tell me what you want to hear because, again, we all know I am lazy as fuck, so I'm going to need you to provide me content and structure. JK, please let me know what you want from the show. I will be reading everything. I'm going to be reading everything.
Since I am running this ship solo for the first time, and even though it's scary, I think it will allow me to talk about things that are very personal and more relatable to me and also for everybody listening. There will be an interactive segment where I will answer your questions and read your wild stories, etc. And I know I will be bringing on guests.
But by guests, I mean like my closest friends and family, maybe sprinkling some of my ex-boyfriends. We could potentially talk about threesomes we've done. I don't know. What? But we are going way, way beyond sex on this show because I know you guys have had 83 blowjob tips and you know how to suck dick underwater at this point.
You guys are super sleuths by now. Yep, sleuths. Mormon culture is big here, if you guys didn't know. And I find myself having to censor my potty mouth constantly. I'm saying, oh my gosh, instead of, oh my God. So sleuth it is. But I want to move on from this. And I want to talk about something that I think a lot of women would never want to admit, but will be able to relate.
I think that every woman has been at a point when they have been so fucking depressed or just feeling extremely lost and they think to themselves, I'm just going to get pregnant and have a family. That's what I'm going to do. That's the band-aid.
Like, I'm not going to lie. I was right there. I was about to like run upstairs and like lie about my fertility schedule and wrap my legs around a guy just so I would never have to resurface and could just have a baby and be a baby maker. I love how I just did a female empowerment segment and now I'm saying this shit.
What is wrong with me? But it's true. It's a thought that like a lot of women have. And again, I did not go through with it. I am not pregnant. I picked myself up. I picked up the pieces. I created my own company. You're listening to this new show.
Side note, I am not discrediting women that have families at all. But we all know there are certain people that you know in your life that they just had a baby because they were feeling a loss of control of their lives and like that was the fix. And they think it will give them direction, which is not bad, which I am not judging. Listen, this is a judge-free zone. I've had the thought multiple times that,
But like I'm also 28 years old. So it's almost that time for me anyways, you know? It's just this crazy pressure women have. And that's just like every woman in every society. Like there is some underlying feelings of pressure, I think, for the majority of us.
But on top of that, like what I really want you guys to understand is where I was brought up in Salt Lake City, Utah, where women are getting married at 19, 20 years old and having to reproduce immediately and are dressing like shit.
I'm sorry. I'm sorry I just forgot that people dress this way, like knee-high brown boots, long skirt, and a tank top over your t-shirt so you don't show your shoulders. It's just wild. I'm just not used to it. I apologize. Nothing but pride for Utah. But...
That's not just where the pressure comes from. It's my family's from Argentina and Spanish people are very family oriented. And it's very important that you have kids. My mom had me very young. My mom had me at 20, 21 years old. And I know like a lot of different cultures and religions like put on this pressure, the Bible belt in the deep South, like different parts of the world, 100%. I mean,
This just occurred to me. This is wild. When everything happened and I moved home, like in the midst of my life crumbling down around me, I remember I had a breakdown and my grandma was there. And she turned to me and she said, Sophia. I was about to do her accent. I was like, people are going to be pissed.
She looked at me and she said, Sophia, why don't you just knock this off? Relax. She said verbatim, relax and start a family. And I was like, grandma, you fucking feel me. That is exactly what I'm going to do. I'm going to have six kids like you did. Oh my God. I could never. But like she said that to me because...
Even generationally, which is another pressure, motherhood is the epitome of a woman's life. It is the peak reason for their existence. And it's like, sometimes you sit there and you're like, you feel the pressure, but then you're also like, am I just a vessel for babies? Like, is this what I'm doing? But it's expected. And so is marriage.
Again, even when you are reaching your late 20s, not even 28, just like late 20s, you look at the guy you're dating and man, you might not know that like your girlfriend is thinking this and I'm not trying to freak you out. But you look over and you're like, is this the one? Is this the guy? Because like if he's not, I need to cut things off. If he is, I need to like lock it down or like stay in the relationship. And then that gives you more anxiety, right?
You have to make sure like, is this the guy I want to spend forever with? Or do I break it off now so I can find the one? And then you're scared to break it off to find the one because you're like, damn, what if I break it off and I don't find a new guy by the time I'm 30, 35, and then I'm fucked.
I can't even imagine. Shout out to all the people listening, all the women listening in their 30s. I know you can freeze your eggs now. I highly support that. I might end up doing that. But like, I cannot even imagine the anxiety women in their 30s go through like when they go on a date.
Because they really have to be like, all right, I'm not dating like the drug dealer, you know, or like the pimp or the guy that like works the drive-thru. No shade. But if you're having a child, that's something you think about. And you have to be like, I need a guy that is like financially stable and da-da-da and da-da-da and wants to have a family and kids. And then you can't even express that.
to the guy you're dating because men are little pussy ass bitches and they will run for the hills and think that you are terrifying. It's just so fucked up. The whole thing. And I think it's just really starting to occur to me because I am 28. But like men, you guys have this shit so easy.
Women legit have to pretend that they just want to be single and fun forever. Yay. They have to pretend to be that way until they get knocked out. I'm being so dramatic, but it's serious.
Or the opposite of that happens and you stay in the relationship you're in, even if it's not what you want, because you are too scared to risk being alone when it's like prime time to reproduce. Oh my God, I feel like men have it so much easier. I know you guys have your own struggles, but still.
And listen, I have never been the marriage type ever. I was never that girl like getting on Pinterest and picking out my little wedding dress and picking out my venue and my ring. I want princess shape. Honestly, like don't really believe in the marriage of construct, but I will probably end up doing it. I will probably end up doing it because I have programmed to like want to do it. Plus taxes and shit. And I like want to protect my kids. Wifey material.
I'm never going to get married after this. It's just really crazy, you guys. It's like people get married and act like it is something you can put on your resume straight up. And it's something I'm working through, as you can tell. And I do want to wrap up this segment of the episode because I just went off on a tangent. The only thing I can say is...
It really is a case-by-case basis. I think that there are some women at a very young age that get married and have babies, and it was like the best decision ever, and they live amazing lives. I totally, I've seen it. I know that that exists. I just know, like, do not have a baby and do not get married to fill a void.
I know that because that shit wears off like the honeymoon phase of like being pregnant and like your boyfriend that cheated on you 20 times being really, really nice to you right now because you have his baby in your belly. And then the baby comes out.
and you have a newborn and that's fun too. And then like some time passes and your boyfriend cheats on you again, but this time he leaves you and the shit has worn off. And then you have to like deal with all of the same shit. You know what I'm saying? Let's move on. I cannot get on this microphone and tell you when it's the right time to have a baby. Everybody is different, but all I can say is...
The right time is when the guy you're gonna have the baby with is rich as fuck. It is always the right time if you are dating a millionaire. I'm kidding. I'm kidding. But you guys get what I'm saying. Moving on. Glad I got that off my chest. Save on Cox Internet when you add Cox Mobile and get fiber-powered internet at home and unbeatable 5G reliability on the go.
♪♪♪
So I was just about to wrap this up, but I just thought about something and I quickly want to touch on it. And I know I keep bringing up Utah, but I have been trapped here for seven months. Trapped. I am such an asshole. Utah is actually a really lovely state. Again, nothing but pride, Utah. I love you. Go Utes. But it has just brought up a lot of memories about how insane I was when I was younger.
The other day I was driving and I passed the Gateway Mall, which for those of you who don't know what it is because you're not in the know, it is a Utah hotspot or it was 20 years ago. I'm pretty sure it's closed down now.
And the amount of things that I would shoplift is absolutely insane. And I wouldn't even steal cool stuff, though. It was all, like, Forever 21 jewelry and makeup from fucking Walmart. So sad. I would steal, like, bright pink lipstick, the Wet n Wild brand. Do you guys remember that brand? And...
It wouldn't even match my complexion because I couldn't even fucking try it on. But then my complexion didn't even match my neck. So I guess it doesn't even matter. We've all been there. Anyways, it's just so funny to me because I remember being in Forever 21 and the amount of stuff that I would put on my body. It was like seven layers of leggings. I would just put them all on top of each other. Five t-shirts, three crewnecks and a fucking hoodie. Yeah.
And there is just no way that they did not know what I was up to. You would think I would know better than to walk out of the store looking like a fucking linebacker or like the Michelin man.
Okay. I digress. Yeah. It was just like really crazy to me. And I would just do it all the time. I remember my friends and I would go home and we would look at all of the price tags on everything. We would add it up in the calculator and be like, we just got away with stealing like $400 worth of crap. And we would be so excited. And before you judge me,
I just want to clarify that I would never steal from a individual or family-owned business. Only corporations, okay? What is that, TikTok? And the girl's like, if it's a chain, it's free reign. If it's a chain, it's free reign. Fucking brilliant. But I think that's really all I wanted to say. I think I obviously stopped after a while because
I think what did it for me was getting tackled outside of an Urban Outfitters. That shit really happened. Let me just quickly tell you, I stole some clothes and I remember I made it out the door pretty far, like legit 10 feet. I really thought I was going to get away with it. And I straight up got tackled to the ground.
I didn't get tackled, but he took me from behind. Oh my God. Insert sex joke. Excuse me. He grabbed my body, my arms from behind hard as fuck. And he asked me if I stole something. And I said, yes, just straight away. I didn't even try to deny it. And they took me into the back room and told me to call my mom because I wasn't 18 yet. And I was like,
I am so smart for getting all of this petty crime in before I'm 18. And that is what my mom should focus on when she comes to pick me up. Okay. I obviously, so I was in the back room. I was like, my mom's going to kill me. And so I called my aunt instead because she's like my super cool aunt. And I knew she would have my back, but she didn't pick up. But I had called her like five times and I left her a voicemail and I was like,
I was like, oh my God, I just got in a lot of trouble. Can you please come to Urban Outfitters at the Gateway Mall and say you're my mom? We have the same last name and say you're coming to pick me up, please. I left her a voicemail. So I'm sitting in the back office for three hours and they keep walking in every 15 minutes, like the store manager or whatever. And he's like, where is your mom? Because you're about to get hauled off and taken to jail. Like, where the fuck is she? And
So finally, I was like, I'm just going to accept defeat and call her. I call my mom. She screams at me. She comes to pick me up.
And the funniest part of this story, so fucked up. My aunt ended up showing up to the Urban Outfitters like five minutes after I left with my real mom. And she walked in and she said she was screaming like, where is my daughter? Like, she is in so much trouble. And they were like, ma'am, like her mom picked her up.
Wow. Urban Outfitters was probably like, what type of degenerate family is this? But that's it, guys. I might dip my toes in again. The five-finger discount club with all my little shoplifters. No, I won't. I'm kidding. Never again. But I do want you guys to make me feel better. Please someone write in and tell me that you did the same shit or tell me your hilarious stories today.
And I'm going to read one on the next episode. Let's do that. Because I think this shit is hilarious. And I'll give you a little shout out. Your IG bio, whatever you want. We'll figure it out. All right. So I think that's it. I have to say I was feeling a little bit nervous when I first started recording, but I feel so much more comfortable now. And I think that this show and this podcast is going to be fucking amazing.
I will be talking about some wild ass shit, doing crack. I don't know. But nothing is off limits here. And I want to say how grateful I am for everyone that's tuned in. Like there's probably like six listeners left. Guys, it is imperative if you are still listening that you go subscribe because if I don't hit at least double digits, like in the 20s, 30s, 40s, I'm going to get dropped by this company too.
My own company. So please, please help me out and follow me on all of my socials because I am going to start posting again frequently. I'm going to hit up Twitter. I think Twitter is my sense of humor. But more importantly than subscribing or even listening to anything I just said in this shit show or following me on my socials, please register to vote.
There's one thing you take from this. Please, please, please go register. I know there's a lot of deadlines coming up. And that's it. I will be back next week and the week after and the week after that for fucking ever because I'm not going anywhere. See you, sleuths.
