Andy Cohen: Bravo! 59:55

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Hey everyone, season two is coming soon, but today I'm bringing back one of my favorite people, Sir Andy Cohen. Andy stopped by my son's bedroom for this very special episode and I apologize in advance for his chewing. Andy really does love a snack. Enjoy the episode.

And then I often think to myself, well, what would I be doing if I didn't have kids? I would be masturbating and getting high, but I still masturbate and get high plenty with kids. So, you know, maybe I'm not missing that much. Somebody got to cue me or do I cue myself? Cue yourself. Okay. Hey, everybody. It's another episode of Let's Talk Off Camera. So let's get talking. I want to say hi to...

Albert and Jan, what are your questions for Andy? It's hard for me to interview Andy because I know everything. I've got a lot of questions. Okay. Yeah, no, I'm all into the Bravo universe. There's a lot going on. The Bravo verse. Oh, I just heard a ding dong. You don't know? We're going to fill in. We're going to fill in. Do you know about Scandival? I know all about Scandival. You do? I do. Is that a person?

It's, well, there's Tom Sandoval and so they call it Scandival. Here's what I'll tell you, Kelly, is like they filmed this months ago, right? But then we find out after the fact that there was this whole affair going on. So when you're watching what was filmed months ago, knowing what you know, it's like mind blowing. Like it's so deceptive. It's so crazy. You would actually really enjoy it. Are these married people?

You know, Mark and I used to call them the kids until we found out they were like nearly our age. Right. So how long have they been together, Roz? Like nine years or something? Ten years. So they were in a relationship for ten years, which is what? Common law marriage, right? Yeah, common law. Yeah. So he was cheating with her best friend. You know me. Girl code. Yeah. No, big girl code. There are certain things you don't... Like, let's say I'm a single girl. Yeah. And you left Glenn. And you...

ghosted all of us you're like i have to leave glenn i'm i'm moving to hawaii with my new lover who's a surfer and glenn said kelly only you you alone can soothe my suffering oh my god that is still girl code it's like no that is girl code sorry glenn total girl code but good luck if you

want to go there no i'm just it's like there's girl code you do not ever oh but this is like even grosser because like she's talking to her best friend about like so what's going on with your sex life she's like literally in it with her so she wants the details that she can like use again yes oh it's so so diabolical it is it's crazy and are they together now scandaval and the other girl

Well, the reunion's going on right now. And yeah, I mean, I think they're still together. I think he's in love with her. It's gross. He's in love with you. And she was, this is so incestuous. They were all, she was with a different one of the friend group and was engaged to him. She was hooking up with his best friend. It's all gross. Never, never, never fuck your friends. Okay. Did you hear me?

It's just so messy. It's so unnecessary. Don't they have any other friends? Isn't this in Los Angeles? Please. And they're the most gorgeous people. Are they all good looking? They're all good looking, but you're like, come on, there's got to be other people out there.

I don't know if they're just trying to be relevant or what's going on. It's insane. And I'm like for Andy, I'm curious to know what he's dealing with because all on all these casts, not just that one, but also on Real Housewives, everybody's leaking stuff to like, I guess, get the press on their side. I don't know, but it's ruining his shows because you're finding out all this information before you're supposed to. You know who's not a leaker?

Michael Consuelos. Not a leak. He works there, yeah. He works on several shows. I put together that he was working for the Real Housewives of New Jersey. He's a producer, by the way. He's not a cast member. I feel like I need to clarify that.

He is actually using his degree. Yes. And he has been working production on several different shows. And getting high praise from a lot of people. Yeah, he is. Friends of mine that are DPs that have worked with him. He's great. I knew he had gotten a job and he wouldn't tell me doing what. And I said, why? And he goes, I had to sign an NDA. And I was like, wow, they don't mean that. You know?

And he's like, I can't tell you what. And I was like, you can tell me. I'm your mom. And he's like, sorry, I can't tell you. And I was like, yes, you can. I was like, I paid for your school, dude. Tell me everything. Tell me everything. I insist. And he wouldn't.

Anyway, here's how I put it together. Ready? This is what a sleuth I am. He sends me a picture of a cake in a bakery. And he goes, Mom, did you used to get my Cookie Monster birthday cupcakes from this bakery? And I said, where are you? And he goes, oh, I'm in New Jersey. And I go, are you producing the real Housewives of New Jersey?

And then he ghosted me. Like he ghosted me for weeks, weeks and weeks. He just never responded to me. And I was like, what are you doing on The Real Housewives? He wouldn't say a word, not a word, not a single word. And it was Andy who texted me like,

Two months or three months later, he goes, sweetie, when were you going to tell me that Michael is working as a producer on the Housewives of New Jersey? And I go, sweetie, I didn't know. I suspected he wouldn't tell me anything. I just knew he was working somewhere where he had to sign an NDA.

So then he gets another job and I go, what are you working on? And he says, I can't tell you. And I go, is it another Bravo show? And he goes, I can't tell you. And then I see him post on his stories the other day, the Real Housewives of New York trailer. Yeah. Yeah. And I was like, dirty bird. Yeah. You could have given me so much dish and you give me nothing.

Nothing. And these are like good ones. He's not good. Was he on Salt Lake too? He was, I don't know. I know he was skiing somewhere. I got out of him that he was in a pantry in New Jersey and he was with the other producers hiding in a pantry. That's all I got out of him. I see when he was like, I'm in a pantry in New Jersey. I assumed he was visiting his grandparents. No, no, no. When it comes to Andy though,

We all know that Andy, pre-kid Andy, had a convertible, went out all the time, was a New York City nightlife guy. Yes. What is the new SUV Andy miss from the convertible Andy? There are certain people that I think were just born to be parents, and Andy is one of those people. He values family above all else. Yes.

He's exceptionally good with children. He's been great with my kids all their lives. If I really want to get through to Lola, I used to send in Andy. He was born to be a father. Having said that, yes, he's totally fucked up his...

sanctuary in peace. I want to know what he misses. We all have, though. Yeah, we all have. But I do think that we were all, like, we were made to procreate and to bring more of us into the world. Speaking of which, why aren't we bringing more into the world, Albert? Kelly can answer this better than I can. Seriously. You know, I feel as though Kyle has shut down Albert. Kyle has shut down Albert's dreams of having sex.

Is that true? Is that true? You're not editing this out, Albert. I wish this were an on-camera podcast because I would do the face. But saying the word having kids to Kyle is like watching a truck careen off a ravine and crash. Yeah, he gets visually like a lot. You say it to him and he stiffens up. Yes, he stiffens up. The thing that I will say is that there are many things in our life that I pushed to have happen and he fought me on it.

As it was happening, he was pissed off. And now he looks back and he says, thank God that you did that. But I just don't think you could. I don't think that that applies to this one. I think both people have to want the child. You know, I look at your lives and they're so good and they're so full. And there's a part of me that's like, why mess with that?

But it makes me sad if you want a kid. Yeah, I do. But I don't think there's a... I don't feel that there's like a need for it. It's not at a point where I think it's worth...

uprooting this amazing life that I have when everything is great. It'll loop right back to like meditation and acceptance, Jan, which I know how much the two of you love. He's going to meditate those kids right out of his sperm. It's about acceptance. You accept certain things in life. And if you don't, you could just stay in a vicious cycle of anger and resentment. But if you accept it and you just think this is acceptance and you move on. I love it.

I love what he just said before. He goes, there's a lot of stuff I pushed him to do. And then afterwards he said, thank you. I go, that's called being a wife. I know. As I was saying that, I looked at you like, so many women have kids that way. My whole life is pushing Glenn to do things he doesn't want to do. And then getting thanked afterwards. And he's on his way up. It's all about to happen. I can't wait for him to really feast his eyes on all of this. He's all of this.

I mean, I feel like... Pull out his folding chair. Look at his bowl of snacks. Wow. It's a hot mic. Oh, my God. This is amazing. Good. Oh, my God. Oh, perfect. This is what I want. That's okay. Okay.

We've just been discussing you before you got here. Okay, that's nice. You look great, by the way. Thank you. Thank you for making time. I'm fully made up. Are you? Yeah. You've been on camera since what? Six o'clock this morning? Since 730. Well, we've been on Albert because Albert wants to have children. Okay, well, we need to talk about this. Kyle does not want to have children. Okay, well, then we need to talk to Kyle. Albert had questions about like, what do you miss? Yeah, what do you miss about pre-child Andy?

Good question. Do you miss anything? Yes, I do. I think, well, going back, you know that I wrote two other diary books about my life. And I think that when you do that, and even if you just write in a diary, you look at your life and you look at what you do every day and you think,

You know, I think I stepped away thinking, well, this is all fun. And I basically, I published three summers of my life and every summer was kind of exactly the same. They were all amazing. But I did come away thinking kind of, is that all there is? Or what more is there for me? Is that all there is? Yes. And especially as I was approaching 50, I just thought...

I would like some depth to my life that is not about the fun I'm having or my friends or my jobs, which I love very much. And so to me, I, you know, I, and I always saw in my mind kids, I just had a vision of Ben. I had a vision of Ben. I certainly miss freedom and I miss, um,

- Sleeping. - I miss sleeping. I do, and I miss walking around my house naked. And I miss being the only one in my house. And did I say freedom? I do miss the freedom. But then again,

I don't question this for a second. And even in the mornings when I am hurled into the day at ungodly hours of the day, there's never a moment where I think, "What am I doing or why am I doing this?" It just is. You just do it. And that's the paternal instinct, I guess. You just become that. And then I often think to myself, "Well, what would I be doing if I didn't have kids?"

And I think, well, I would be masturbating and getting high, but I still masturbate and get high plenty with kids. So, you know, maybe I'm not missing that much. It's what I said to Albert before you walked in the room is that

Mark and I would watch you with our kids. And we just knew that you'd be a great dad. Like it was not even a question. It's like, well, when Andy has kids. Same with Albert. Same with Albert. Yeah, same. And I say it about Kyle too. As much as Kyle protests, I still say Kyle would make an incredible father. And guess what? There are plenty of dads that have kids that I don't say that about. And you are like in it and you...

do the work and you show up and I'm just so proud of you. I really, really am. - I appreciate it. May I take the opportunity to pat myself on the back and say, I'm proud of myself too. - Yes, I'm proud of you. - Because you did it knowing that you did not have a co-parent. - Right. - You started, I feel like,

I know that Anderson wanted to have kids. I know it was like a long discussion. Like for years we would talk about him having kids. But I feel like when you did it, it was like, all right, I'm going to do it. And I will say to Kyle that Anderson is raising his two kids with Benjamin, his former partner, who's really like his family. And Benjamin really did not want kids at all. And so maybe Benjamin is the person that should speak to Kyle. Well, I sat at Mark's birthday.

I deliberately sat Kyle next to Benjamin. There was a method to my seating madness. I sat you next to Seacrest. I sat...

Kyle next to Benjamin. And I spent my time trying to get Seacrest to watch virtual reality porn. Amazing. What goes on with that? Well, I mean, you feel like there's a thing in my book about it. I was out to dinner with friends and I go, oh, I have an Oculus. And he said, oh, have you started using it? I said, no. And I said, can you watch porn on that? He goes, can you watch porn on it? I go, come over after dinner. And he set it up. No, it's very exciting. There's a funny moment in the book where my friend Jackie comes over and

and I put the thing on her eyes and she looked down

And she had a penis if she looked down. And she could not believe it. And it was watching her discover her male anatomy was one of the funniest things I've ever seen. You know what's so funny is that I use the same Oculus for something called Supernature, which is a workout app. And I had no idea when you were telling Ryan about the porn, I was like, what is he talking about? It's a fitness. I was like, it's for fitness.

Not in the gay world. Yes, everything is better in the gay world. But my favorite part of the book is when, I guess, Seacrest, and I don't even remember him having this conversation with me on the air after that dinner was talking about the virtual reality porn. Well, but he said, Andy Cohen was trying to get me into something unmentionable. This whole thing...

So then, ring-a-ling-a-ling, Evelyn Cohen on the phone, my mother. Oh, no. What were you telling Seacrest to do? All caps. Yes. All caps. I love Evelyn's voice in the book is always in all caps. Can we have a round of applause for Evelyn Cohen? Yeah. I mean. So let's talk a little bit about moving forward and finding you a co-parent because-

Benjamin wants a second daddy. He does. Does he? He does. He said it. Now, I think the reason he wants another dad is because I'm everything. So I'm the guy that says no also. Right. So I think he wants someone to go to who will be like, yeah, you can have the ice cream.

Yeah, but that's not. We don't question it. But you'll never do that because you have to be, here's what second dad has to do. Co-parent needs to be a united front with you. Yes, exactly. Even when you disagree. Right, yes. You disagree behind closed doors and quiet. Right, yes. And you have to do it very quietly because they'll push their little ears. They're like the bionic woman with their hair. They seem to hear everything. They hear everything, everything. Yeah. And so you have to be.

Right. I'm hoping he's nowhere near learning how to spell because I spell so many things to people in the room. What's the worst word you've spelled in front of him? Oh, well, I mean, I've spelled every word in front of him. I don't spell curse words in front of him. But there's a babysitter who's D-O-G-D-I-E-D. Oh.

the other day. And so I, that was the last thing I spelled in front of him this morning. Yes. I said, the nanny got there and I said, listen, you need to know that the D O G D I E D looking at us like, what? Okay. He's going to figure that out fast. He already knows that he's smart. He knows that D O G is dog. He just doesn't know what D I E D meant.

He's obsessed with the queen's death. All year, that's a runner in the book. He keeps saying like, but why did the queen die? And it was so great. The queen is such a good example because I said she lived the most full life. She lived over 90 years and she did everything and it's a beautiful thing. Look at it. So that was a good- Did that make him sad that she- I don't know why. I can't remember why it was on his radar. Did you say the Q-U-E-E-N?

D-I-E-D? No, no, he knew. Somehow I walked in the room and he knew she was dead. And I mean, I haven't explained Camilla to him yet, which will, you know. Well, do you want the Consuelos Queen Camilla to explain it to him? Yeah, right, yes. My mother-in-law is very upset that she has the same name as Queen Camilla and she's like, we will not discuss the other Camilla. That's funny. She's literally like,

hashtag not my queen. Right. If she knew what that, if she knew what a hashtag was. That's funny. So, okay. So when you think about a co-parent slash partner for yourself,

what's your type? Because I feel like everybody is your type. Everybody has an opportunity. Well, I am like the UN. I accept everybody. Yeah. But in a situation like this, it's someone strong, someone who has their own thing going on, someone who...

is not afraid to be my boyfriend. You know? You get that a lot. I remember you had somebody that was... Well, I remember with Clifton, the Daily Mail kind of outed him. He was an ex-boyfriend of mine and

Now, when you Google his name, I come up and, you know, you want for someone, you want what they're known for. And as it turns out, he was actually an epidemiologist. He like, you know, he was doing great things. Exactly. So I want someone who's not afraid of that. Is that your physical type? A Clifton? My physical type is all over the map. It really is. And.

which is good news. But the thing about it is I am the type of person that anytime I have been in love, which is only two and a half times, the person that I have fallen for, I have almost known it from when I met them. Or I certainly, when I met them, I was like, I need to hang out with this person more. Like this person's interesting. So I think that's kind of a good thing because it means I have a sense of what I'm attracted to.

So I'm walking through life waiting for this person to present themselves to me. And I am open to it. I am. And is it harder because you are older and established? And I like to say that Mark and I met at a time where we were very pliable. Right. The things that I did that drove Mark crazy, he could slowly...

whittle that behavior away from me, the things that drove me crazy about him, I was able to sort of gently suggest over time and we became... But I, like you, I knew immediately that he was my person. But we were so young. Right. That does worry me, especially since I have a big life and it's kind of all set up.

Like I just built a beach house. So let's say I meet someone who's allergic to sand. Right. Or it's like, oh no, I go to the Jersey shore and I go to my parents' house on the Jersey shore. And that's where we're going. I'm like,

Well, can we sometimes go to my beach house? But I think it's about, look, it is about me kind of being open to, you know. Yes. Being pliable. Yes, you're right. But I worry that my situation is so set, especially with two kids. Like there's a thing in the book where I'm on a date with someone and I say, well, you know, there's an elephant in the room.

And he thinks that the elephant in the room is my fame. And I said, the elephant in the room is that I have two kids and you'll be like, if this continued, that would play a huge part. And so the fame thing, we had been out at that point like 10 times. And I said, how has that impacted us? I mean, have we been mobbed?

anywhere? Have we been paparazzi'd? And he said, no, now that I think about it, we haven't. I said, okay, well, that's in your head. Well, I always say fame is as normalized as you normalize it. You are very normal. You like when people say, oh, Andy, I love you. You're like, oh, hey, thanks. I love you too. And you keep going. You're the same way. But don't you think living in New York

kind of does that. Yes, but you and I... I think Sarah Jessica's that way. Yes. She lives... We live on the street. We live on the street with people, but... We go to where we're going. You and I both know a couple of people that we're not friendly with, so I can call this out, that are very...

convinced that there's paparazzi lurking everywhere. And oh my gosh. And that person with his cell phone camera is taking a picture of me at the restaurant. And I'm like, I think they're just taking a picture of the food. Right. Exactly. Calm down. Anderson has a huge pet peeve about people kind of sneaking pictures. And I say to him,

Sweetie, like they're not bothering you. Who cares? It's going to be a shitty picture. Like they're not, it's just not, he's not, he's not the one I was thinking of. No, I know. No, I know. No, I know he's not. And by the way, Anderson doesn't think there's paparazzi around every go. I mean, he's someone who very much lives in the city and writes his bike. So yeah, I'm always, you know, I talk about this with you all the time because I have,

thoughts about who I think is good for you. Tell them, tell these guys the time that you took, you had a date. It was the days of like dating where you're swiping, right? Right. What? This was like a way too young person for me. He was young and he came to your apartment. He said something like your apartment is so big. Something. I said, I'm an established person. I'm an established person.

I can't. It's true. It made me laugh so much. Yes, yes. But I think he said something way stupider than just... It was like very dumb. I think it may have been like, oh, you don't have a roommate. And I was like, I'm an established person. He said, are you afraid your roommate's going to come home? And you were like, I'm sad. Yes, I said I'm an established person. Okay, so listen. We've got a lot to get to. But Jan, I would be remiss because I, as you know, I've...

I'm a big Bravo fan. - Yes. - I watch most of the shows. - Yes. - But the one that has escaped me, - Is Vanderpump. - continues to escape me is Vanderpump. - What do you mean, Jen? - I mean everything. - Yes.

So you remember in the timeline that Sheena and Raquel were famously on Watch What Happens Live. Yes. The night that Ariana found out, the night that Raquel was busted, the night that Sheena allegedly like hit Raquel or something happened, the next morning, the executive producer texted me and said, you're never going to believe this. Everyone has just found out, but Sandoval has been sleeping with Raquel.

I said, what? You're kidding me. And the amazing thing is that I then wound up texting him furiously as I was watching the last six episodes of the season as I was on the plane to LA to do the reunion. And I said, are you telling me

That are you telling me? You're telling me that now I'm doing Sandy Gallen. Are you telling me that? None of you knew because when you watch the last six episodes, it's an incredible watch knowing what has transpired It's really amazing

And I said, are you telling me no one knew? And he said, no one knew because Ariana kept shutting everyone down and saying... And you see that happening on the show. She's saying, no, Raquel's my friend. You guys, stop this. Ariana's the other woman? Ariana is the woman who was cheated on. She's the scorned woman who's now going to be on Dancing with the Stars. And she's everyone's... She's America's sweetheart. She has the wind in her sails. And so...

You know, a lot of times when something like that happens on a show like this or on the housewives, you know, Ariana is shutting it down and she's saying, you guys, this is nothing. Stop. Stop.

And so basically what it will start seeming like is these guys keep pushing it for a storyline, you know, and these are her friends. So she's going to be like, you guys stop. I'm not kidding because now you're annoying me and you're going to hurt my relationship with Tom. So they all happen to be right. Everyone who's suspected, which is wild. What about when Raquel, sorry, I'm getting in deep, but what about when Raquel

Raquel was talking to her, Ariana, about their sex life. You've heard all the buzz about micro laser fat removal at Sono Bello, right? It's remarkable how in just one visit, your stubborn fat is gone permanently. Once a year, Sono Bello invites listeners to their exclusive summer savings event featuring their best pricing of the year for a limited time only. A

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What about when Raquel was talking to her, Ariana, about their sex life? I said to Raquel, when we taped the reunion, I said, you looked her in the eye and talked to her about her intimacy issues in the relationship and said, why aren't you having sex? And I believe I said to her, that seemed diabolical. So...

Hopefully that's in the cut and you can get her answer. I haven't seen the reunion yet. It's crazy. So they were having intimacy issues. They were. They were. And that had been established. And they're not married? Is that right? They were not married. They were together nine years. She didn't want kids.

And he did. And that was a conversation. And they were, they had talked in years past about intimacy issues that they had had. She talked very openly about body image issues that she had had and she didn't feel sexy and she didn't feel hot. Now, meanwhile, her husband,

really found his mojo last year with this cover band that he was in. And he is now performing and he's running around selling out these venues like Irving Plaza and all these venues. And he's, you know, shirtless singing, living his rock star life. And now has his audience turned on him? He is, as I told him at the reunion, the most hated man on television. Wow. Yes, he really is. People are...

To the point that when you see him at the reunion, he is a shell of himself and he's shaking. And it's like, I mean, he's really being taken to task by the world. Are they still together? Tom and Raquel. I don't have that answer. It's unclear.

- Oh. - They were at the reunion. - Oh, okay. - Yeah. - And so did they walk in together? Forgive me, I'm stressed. I'm stressing now. - No, I think they arrived separately. - It's insane. - I think they arrived separately. - And was there any physical altercations like there would be if this was a New Jersey reunion? Did anybody be physical? - There was, well, yes, James Kennedy went after Tom and I had to physically restrain him twice.

And I'm gonna tell you something, he was difficult to restrain. You saw, I lost my cards, I was very upset. So yes. - Do you have bodyguards there just in case? - There are security, but I have to tell you, as much as there's security, the only person that's really gonna be able to get in between people is me, is the truth of the matter, because I'm right there. So security is behind where the cameras are. And we only just started having security, and we don't have security at most reunions.

At some we do. Always at Jersey. Always.

Your people. Yeah, no, my people. Yes, your people. And this year at Jersey, I was very concerned that Louie and Joe Gorgo were going to get into it. And I went to both of them several times and said, I beg you to stay in your seat. I beg you. I was so nervous. I beg you. I have two children. Yes, exactly. Right. Yes. And so tell me about that because that is something, and don't get me wrong, I love my sister-in-laws. Yeah.

but I would not want to do a reality TV show with them. Right, yes, of course. I just would not. Well, either does Teresa. So you have something in common. Well, we have to figure out, we're at a crossroads with Jersey and there are several options. Because they're both, they're wildly popular. They're both really popular and they've both been on, I mean, you know, Melissa's been on television for 10, 12 years. I mean, so, you know. Teresa and-

Melissa both remind me of every girl I went to high school with and all of my relatives. So I have intense love for them both. Right. Even though I don't know them really at all, but I love them. I just don't understand how, like what I'm watching. And then the, when you hear other people,

housewives recapping what happened at the beach house or wherever seems so twisted. Like it always seems like I'm missing something. Well, I think they're both walking around with the institutional knowledge that they both have and the institutional hurt feelings, which neither, especially Teresa-

Teresa let out at the last reunion that she was mad at Melissa for not changing her wedding date because Teresa was pregnant at her wedding and she was a bridesmaid. She didn't like how she looked. So this is now going back for 15 years. I mean, that she's clearly not over it. So, you know, I think what's interesting about it

is, and I know that there's some fatigue about their, you know, dispute. But I think what's interesting about it is I think they're both a little right. I think they both have really good points. And I think that's why it's not so clearly cut about whose side to be on. And the kids seem to be getting involved now. Yes, yes, you're right. But they're adults in their defense. And it's after all these years, kind of fascinating to hear from Gia.

Yeah. You know? Yeah. I just can't believe all these people come on with all this stuff in their closets and then they come on. Like, Jennifer didn't think that her husband cheating on her was going to come out. Like, how does that shit go on? Don't go on reality TV if you have a secret. I mean, it's just... Or do it because it'll make great TV. Well, yeah, please. But it's true. What about the financial entanglements that they seem to constantly get themselves involved in? Is it...

this need to portray an image? I think sometimes it's that. Or is it that they don't understand how much money they're making versus what they're spending? I think it's sometimes the first. I think it's sometimes the latter. I think it's sometimes there is no guidebook on how to be famous. And these people suddenly become really famous. And then they think, oh, that's a good investment. I should open a restaurant or I should do this. Andy, I've got a great idea for your next book. What?

The Housewife's Guides to Finance. Yeah, right. Like you literally just teach them how not to file for bankruptcy. But I will say, all of the Vanderpump kids, kids, Summer House kids,

Southern Charm, all those shows on Bravo, every time they're on Watch What Happens Live, I say to them, and this goes back to Jack's season two, save your money. Are you saving your money? Do you have a 401k? I ran into Craig Conover from Southern Charm on the train to DC the other day. And we were sitting there and I go, how's your money? And we were talking about it. And he said, I remember you asking me if I was saving my money a few years ago.

He said, and I was in really bad shape financially. And I was so embarrassed when you asked me and he said, I'm happy to say now I'm in a good place. I said, do you have a 401k? He said, yes. I go, how much are you giving? Can you up your donation? Like I really do because reality TV is a fleeting lady and

And she disappears and she will fire you, you know? And so you can't depend on that. I will say that you stay with the women. And I've said this a million times, like you are such an advocate for women that you stay with them.

Through thick and thin and thicker and thicker. And it takes a lot. They have to go to jail for you to act. Or be boring on television. Or have the viewers hate them. Right.

Right. But even then, there's love to hate and hate to hate. Who do you think the audience loves to hate and who do you think they hate to hate? I think that there was a time that they love to hate like a Kenya Moore or a I think Lisa Rinna even for a while was a

playful villain. And then I think the audience got a little too wound up and then suddenly they're booing her at BravoCon and it's like, Lisa Rinna is fun. Like she's fun. I don't want that for her. I don't want her to be booed at BravoCon. Yeah, ever. Or anywhere.

But I don't want to name names because it makes the people feel bad. Okay, but who are the biggest... Now, Jan was telling me this, that there are like big leakers. Oh, yeah. Well, that's in the book, actually. I say... Oh, that's where I read it. I was in...

You did read my book. That's where I read it. No, there was a moment where I'm in Cannes for work and I run into a reporter for Page Six and I said, can I name three people to you? And you tell me

if I am correct in saying, and there are three people who really are always like, "Oh, I never, I don't talk to the press, whatever." And he said, "You are dead on." - Wow. - Yeah. - And it got to the point where Roni, which, Housewives of New York, we're relaunching a new Real Housewives of New York City. Thank you.

And you follow the progression of this plan that I pitched to Bravo at some point in the year. And you see me in the book. I have a meeting. I'm pitching this plan to split it off and break it off. Plan was agreed upon, whatever. We were going to announce it.

And we did not tell the original Real Housewives of New York until we put out the press release at 2:00 PM on a certain day. I believe we set up like a little phone tree, Lisa Shannon, one of the EPs, me and someone else. We, each of us took like two wives and we said, we're going to tell them at 1:58.

And the night before, weirdly, Luann was on my show the night before for some reason. Oh, my God. And she's like, darling, what's happening with our show? What's happening with our show? I go, oh, I do need to talk to you about that. I said, I actually have news for you. She goes, well, can you come to my dressing room after the show? And I said, no. I go, let's talk tomorrow around dinner.

And so, you know, it's so funny. And, you know, I was so happy though that I had news to tell Luann.

And so it's, yeah, they're a leaky ship. - Yeah. - Yes. - Beverly Hills too, Beverly Hills, they leak. - Beverly Hills is very leaky too. And there's a moment when I get my star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame, it's when the Beverly Hills housewives have just gotten back from Aspen and the infamous Kathy Hilton meltdown that happened off camera. - How can that not be on camera? - Tell me about it. And Lisa, and there are conspirators who think that we,

buried the footage. And I promise you, folks, that we did not. We would have shown it. And people thought Kathy Hilton was so powerful that she had the footage unnoticed.

untrue we did not have any footage but it was being leaked everywhere everything that had happened and i'm calling rena like the day before the star saying do you is is something happening with tmc she's like no absolutely not like okay well i'll see you at the star tomorrow whatever so it's just it's a wild dance that i do and i try to put a lot of housewives

In entities and conversations in the book so that people can get a taste of what you're dealing with. Yes. From the sublime to the ridiculous. Yeah. And is there going to be a house New York legacy housewives show? Yes. It is. Yes. We just announced it. And it's it's going to be an ultimate girls trip.

And that seems to be what they wanted. They really, we were negotiating with them. Leaky ship. They were negotiating everything. They were leaking all this stuff that was going on with our negotiations. I'm like, we pulled the offer because of something. It was on page six, like immediately. And page six is like, legacy is dead. Of course we pulled the, sometimes you pull an offer in order to make a statement and get people to maybe reaffirm

rethink the offer that had been present right you know but of course they call page six so then it's like okay well now we're gonna pull it for longer you know so right you wear them down well they wear us down too i mean it's an exhausting process but no i what they kept saying was that they just wanted to be on a trip and shoot much less and so we said fine let's do that

I kind of love that. Can you tell us who will be? Yeah, yeah, yeah. It is Ramona, Kelly, Ben, Simone, Luann, Sonia, Kristen Taichman, and Dorinda. Yeah, so that'll be fun. And Kevin Costner shows up for Luann. Yes, exactly. Is that her plan? She said publicly that she wants to smash him. Smash Kevin Costner? Let me ask you another question. I know that Teresa was like,

Calling you from prison? Yeah, we were emailing from prison. Emailing. You wouldn't get the phone call like, you have an inmate. No, no, no, no, no. Does Jen Shaw contact you from prison? We don't have that kind of relationship. Teresa and I knew each other for...

Nine, ten years before she went up the river. And so I, you know, I really knew her. I had met Jen Shah in person two times only in person. Oh, wow. Wow. Only at two reunions because it happened during COVID. Right. So she was never on Watch What Happens Live in person. We kept her off Watch What Happens Live for a whole season because she had been busted. It's so interesting. Speaking of footage that's like not on camera, the whole black eye thing.

That was not on camera, yes. And I have so many thoughts about what happened. Because I flip-flopped. What do you think? I have to believe Jen Shah was involved in how she got her black eye. That's what Mark thinks. 100%. I think the other one was so drunk that she slipped and fell and hit her eye. I know, but then just say I was so drunk I slipped and fell and hit my eye. I mean, I don't know.

She was covering up for her because she didn't want her case to be worse than it already was. Right, that's what I think. But they didn't seem to be like that close. It seemed like Jen Shaw wasn't. Yes, she was. She was pretty close. She was taking up for her in many ways. She also like slipped in one of her confessionals and she's like, well, no, I know what happened. I'm just not. Right. I was like, oh, it definitely.

- Definitely. - Right, yes, exactly. - No, but I think that she was embarrassed. - She told many stories. - I think she was embarrassed that she was that drunk. I think she was embarrassed. - But she said that. - That's my opinion. - She said she was embarrassed that she forgot. I don't know.

Jen punched her. All I know is I went to tea with Andy at Fire Island once and I got drunk like that and fell off the boardwalk. Oh yeah, you did. One of the best photos of you and Mark is on the boardwalk. Let me tell you something. I still am not sure what happened. Mark just said you were walking with us and then we were suddenly, you were gone and we didn't know where you were and I was in a dune. And so if there was a doorknob nearby, that could have been me in my eye.

you know, thank God I just landed in a pile of sand. Right. So in general, what do you think is going to happen with the Hiltons? I have no idea. You mean in terms of Kathy and Kyle? Yeah, I have no idea. We're shooting Beverly Hills right now. And it is certainly a conversation that...

Kyle is having about what's happening with her sister. But beyond that, I don't really know where it's going. And what about Kim and Croy? You know, this is another thing I remember saying for years to Kim on camera. What is happening with your finances? I am worried about your spending. Why is your house so big? Why is your house so big? But again, a huge house in Atlanta.

- Right. - Costs way different from a huge house. - I guess, yeah. - In a lot of other places, but I don't know these finances. I don't, people need to look after it. - So how much, like, do you get a cut? Not you, does Bravo get a cut?

of the cottage businesses that are launched from. You know, I don't know where they are with that. Bethany famously asked Bravo if they wanted to invest in Skinny Girl early on or if they wanted a partner. And I think Bravo said no. So that was dumb. But I don't, as a result, I don't know where Bravo is in relation to

cuts of businesses. I have to assume there's something in there. There's got to be some karma, right? Yes. Because it's like free publicity. Yes. Endless, like millions of dollars of publicity. Yeah. Like every time. Yeah. You know, Ramona drank a glass of, what was her wine? Well, it was Ramona Pinot Grigio. Yes. Which actually was not bad. It was not bad. I don't remember.

I don't remember. I'm sure I had it. I had a stash of it and it took me a while. And then I was like, I don't mind this. Yeah. Now, are you still like seeking out straight couples to have threesomes with? Yeah.

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Are you still like seeking out straight couples to have threesomes with? I'm not. Although there is a story in the book about, it's very funny about this woman who kept calling in saying, I want to be with you, with my husband. And I think I'm in love with you. And I said, well, what does your husband say? She's like, he will do it for me.

And then they came to the show one night. She called and said, I'm going to be at the show. And it was last summer. I think it was in July. It was during the heat of monkey pox. So I was on a total sex lockdown. And I said to her on the radio when she called in, I go, just so you know, you could come in looking like, you know, Marilyn Monroe and your husband could be Joe DiMaggio. But I want you to know that.

I'm not sleeping with you. And also, it was a night that my parents were bartending. And it was just not an opportune night for me to be losing my virginity with a woman. Plus, you know, Mark and I get very nervous with this stuff. Yes. On your behalf. I am constantly convinced that it's going to be a couple of serial killers. You know, I've had this discussion with you many times. I know. Where I'm so afraid for your life. Yes. But the one time...

That one couple. Yes. There was a couple. This is detailed in my last diary, Superficial. Yes. And it was a couple that I met on my book tour in Boston. And this couple presented themselves. And they...

They were amazing. And the guy was such an unlikely... Did you ever meet him? I never met him, but Gelman was sitting over my shoulder and I had my work iPad. Okay, so my work iPad is open. And I'm sitting here, like, reading through my notes and he's over my shoulder trying to show me something. And suddenly...

a completely erect penis pops up on like, so it's not a phone. It's my iPad, right? And it says, I don't know if you, I can't remember if you name him in the book.

I don't. I changed their names. Let's call him Bobby. Okay. And it just says Bobby's cock. Right. It's like text from Andy Cohen, Bobby's cock. Well, because I had already texted Kelly the night before saying, I think I'm going to lose my virginity tomorrow in Boston. Oh.

because this couple had presented themselves to me. And I was like, they're serial killers. Don't do it. Right, right. And I was like, no, no, no. This is all good. We're going to meet for a drink after my signing. And I did meet with them. So no, so it didn't happen with the couple in the current book.

And it still hasn't happened, basically. Good. I don't think you should do it. Well, you know, you never know. I do know. I'm crossing things off my bucket list. Right. But so if you had to pick one Bravo couple, straight couple. To have a three-way win? Yeah. Who would it be? Such a good question. Wow. It would be...

be one of the couples from not the Housewives universe, but I'm not going to say who because it's an HR issue. They're very cute. They are really cute. Is that a yes? No, it's not a yes. He won't say. I won't. Husband dependent. What? Okay. Okay. So let's take you out of the equation. Let's say, who would you choose for Jan's husband to have a three-way as a couple in the Bravo universe?

Well, I don't know Jan's husband. Let's just pretend he's exactly like you. Well, I'll tell you who. Because Jan kind of looks like her, the new New York Housewife, Erin, and her husband. Oh, is he cute? He's very cute. What does he do? Nice Jewish boy. I can't remember. Okay. Yeah. Okay. We'll get down to it. We got some information there. She kind of looks like Jan. I always, like, I think it would have to be like in...

- Kyle and Maurizio. - Amanda. Oh, oh, I see. - Maurizio or-- - Oh, Kyle Richards and Maurizio, yes. - Or Eddie and Tamara. - Right, right. Or Eddie and Tamara are the OC version of Mark and Kelly. - It's so funny. - Totally. - It makes me laugh every time. - Have you met her yet in person? - No, I've never met her. - You've never met her? - I've never met her. - Wow. - No, I'd love to meet her. - Yeah.

Really quick, what's happening with Vicky? Vicky, you will see this season on the Housewives of Orange County. She is kind of a friend and she pops in and her love tank is full. She seems like a pain in the ass. No, but she actually is a breath of fresh air. I mean, there's a moment in the book where I am high off my ass before a Dead & Company show and I'm in the parking lot wandering around and

John Mayer-Taxson says, I had a great idea. We want you to introduce the band tonight. Such a funny story. Such a good story. And I was so excited, but I also was super high because I had just gotten my monkeypox vaccine and it was a Friday and all I had to do was be high at a dead show. So I was like, let me really amp myself up on the THC. Then he says, do you want to do this? I was actually nervous. Then I start getting texts from Vicki Gunvalson on a Friday night.

saying, "I heard that you said I'm an anti-vaxxer on your show, and why are you doing this, and you're blowing me up and all this stuff?" I go, "Vicki, you said it on Ultimate Girls Trip, which is why I said it on my show." And we're fighting on text. And I, again, am in the parking lot, high off my ass,

At which point, finally, I say, "You know what? I'm in a dead show. We will speak about this on Monday." She said, "Oh, I love the dead. Have a blast." So, like, it's just about the communication. In a girl fight between Vicky and Ramona, who would live? Who would live?

I think Vicky would win that one. You do? I do, yeah. Interesting. Do you give them all your cell phone numbers? Are they all texting you? The women who have been on it the longest just have it just by virtue of how long we've been at this, you know? I mean, we've been... There have been many reasons for us to talk.

talk over the years. - But I feel like they try to get you to play sides when they're texting you. - Yes. - Yeah, okay. - Is your mind blown at BravoCon at the magnitude of- - It's amazing. My heart is full at BravoCon because it's just, it feels like we actually built something. There are so few brands

that matter to people anymore, especially on television. It's, it feels great, especially in 2023 to still have a brand that means something to people. At the Javits Center. I mean, it's crazy. and in Vegas this year. It's going to be in Vegas this year. Oh my God. Yeah, it's going to be great. And who, who are the big headlines? Like,

Who are the- That's the great thing. It's- Everybody's all the cast. There are 150 Bravo Leberties. Everybody's there. No, but do you like to get, like, Rebecca and Jerry always come. Oh, well, yeah, no. We'll have famous moderators for some of the panels. Will Gayle King be one of the moderators?

Well, you know, Gail actually funnily emails me or texts me at very odd hours. She keeps very odd hours. And of course, because she hosts that show. She is everywhere and she knows everything. Yes, but she also, she's usually about two episodes behind on things. And she will email me on Sunday morning at, you know, 6.05 in the morning saying,

what is going on with Giselle? You know, whatever it is. And I'll be like, she'll be like, I'm catching up on my stories, please. I love it. You call them her stories? No, I think I know. That's funny. It really is like a modern day soap opera. It is. It really has. Yes. Okay. So should we play the, the fuck, marry, kill? Great. Okay. Ready? Yeah. Let's see. Mauricio, Joe Gorga, Eddie judge.

Wow. I think I'll marry Mauricio. He's got a great portfolio. And I think I'll chag Joe Gorga to see what all the fuss is about. Okay. Yeah. Poor Eddie. I know. I love Eddie. Rest in peace, Eddie. I love him though. Okay. Harry Hamlin, David Foster, Terry Dubrow. Oh, wow.

- I think I would marry David because he would divorce me very quickly and I could get a piece of the assets. And then I would shag, it was Terry. - Or Harry. - Oh, I would shag Harry Hamlin, sexiest man alive. Yeah, yeah. - Erica Jane, Lisa Vanderpump, Bethany. - Oh my God. You're now doing it with housewives. - Yes.

feel like I would marry Vanderpump because again, I feel like we could have a rosé. I don't think she would expect me to make love to her really. And I think we could just live at Villa Rosa and drink the rosé. Play with the dogs. And then I think I would, I think I might be, I love Bethany. I think I might be too intimidated to have sex with her at this point. So I feel like maybe I would do it with Erica and,

Yeah. Yes. But I love Bethany. Erica seems like a party. I don't know her at all. I think so too. Yeah. Yeah. And Bethany will rise again. Yes. Always. Bethany will rise again. Yes, as she always does. Look who has just joined us. Wow. Wow. Mark Consuelos. Wow. The co-host of Live with Kelly and Mark. Yes. I want a Kelly and Mark mug. Wait, I.

You got to play a game. Remind me. Will you write that down? Will you please send me? Because when Ryan got his mug, Ryan was on the show today. He didn't win his mug. He didn't win his mug, but I gave him one. I can give you back my Kelly and Ryan mug because I want a Kelly and Mark mug. I meant to turn to Galman and say, oh, while you're at it, grab me one for Andy. You know what I also would love? Are there any Regis and Kelly mugs?

There should be. They're downstairs in the basement. Really? Oh my God, find me one of those. I'll tell you what, I wouldn't mind a Regis and Kathy Lee mug. I mean, if we're really fishing around the basement. Can we get in the clubhouse with it?

with it? Yes. Oh, yeah. Kelly and Mark in the clubhouse. They're a mug. So when does your book tour end? Oh, it will be over by the time this posts. Really? Yeah. But you know, here's what I learned from writing a book. Yes. The longer you stay on your book tour, the longer it stays on your book tour. No, I know. But I have two kids. I know. And it's funny. I was talking about this to a friend today and she goes, wow, so you're really only doing two weekends. And I said, I

I have kids this time. Like that was the thing. The first few, I kept going out and I loved it and it was so fun and I would love to be able to do it, but I just can't.

Anyway, don't forget, everyone, pick up Andy Cohen's new book, The Daddy Diaries, The Year I Grew Up. It made me laugh so much and it made my heart ache a little bit. Thank you. Yeah, I loved it. I loved it. I appreciate it. You're an excellent writer. Thank you. I love the way you write. Thank you. And write back at me. And watch What Happens Live on Bravo.

and watch all of the Bravo Leberties as they take us on their journeys, the roller coaster. Yes. Stay tuned for part two of Scandaval. Is that right? Well, I mean, it's Scandaval tonight. Yes. Scandaval tonight. And then one more. Yes. Three part reunion. Oh, it's a three part. Oh, of course. Okay. Yeah. Thanks for having me on the podcast. Appreciate it. Thank you for being here. Love being here. Love having you guys. You can see.

- We've got Ask Kelly's, 'cause I feel like you can add to 'em. - Oh, okay. - We've got Ask Kelly's. - We've got sound effects now. - It's time for Ask Kelly! - That's the sound effect? Can I ask one of these? - Yes. - That's the new and improved, wait. That's the new and improved sound effect. - You should ask all of us. - From Ann KTG, "How do you handle the risks that come with fame? Once you've attained it, there's no going back."

Is this a question for me? Yeah. Oh, you know, I don't really think of myself in terms of fame. I've been around famous people. I interview famous people, but I have a perfectly normal life. I think there's a great lesson and you both had it because you were both on All My Children and you became famous at the same time. I certainly had a lot of famous friends before I became famous. And there's a great lesson in watching how other people approach fame and

most of them approach it horribly and become terrible people. And then it's easy to then figure out a way to say, oh, well, I want to be a kind person. Yeah, right. And so I think you both probably did that. Yes, yes, that is true. From Maximiliano, what do you think of your WikiFeet page? There are so many...

foot fetishes. I don't even know what that means. Well, there are many tickle fetishes and feet fetishes. So there is probably a page somewhere of pictures of your feet that guys are masturbating to. Oh, God. If they're masturbating to my feet, then there's something fundamentally wrong. You got your answer, Maximiliano. From CJ Suarez, is Lola still dating the same guy from senior prom?

No. End of story. Okay. There's no real, I want to know what WikiFeet is. It's wikifeet.com. Oh, Jen. I looked it up before I put it in front of you. It's a bunch of pictures of you from the show, like anytime you showed your feet. Really? Most of them, yeah, let's look up Andy's WikiFeet.

Oh, wow. Oh, Christ. I mean, what is that even a picture of? Those look good. Can you look me up on WikiFeet? I want to see. There's a bunch of pictures. I know a foot fetishist couple in Orlando that's been seeking me out. They want to have sex with your feet? Yeah, they're very interested in my feet, and I'm now just wondering if they saw it on WikiFeet.

Oh, I'm sure. Let me just say again, every time you talk about a couple that wants to have sex with you, Mark and I are convinced they are a serial killer. No, I know, but...

- Oh, those are my feet from this summer. - Those are your summer feet. - That's Sarah Jessica's coffee table. - There's a lot of pictures. - Yes, I'd recognize the coffee table anyway. - Oh, I know those feet. I know those feet. - Oh wow, that's my couch. Yes, oh okay. - Your feet are cute. - Wow. - It's a website dedicated to those. - Yeah, no, I have very-- - Clean back foot. - Oh, that looks weird.

Oh, that's reading to Ben. I mean, that's not appropriate. I mean, these people are like really screen grabbing the shit out of your feet. Yeah, there you go. Listen, I know. You got to draw the line. Anyway, everyone. I'm glad we established that. All right. Well, Andy Cohen, thank you so much. We'll talk off camera next week. Bye bye. Let's Talk Off Camera with Kelly Ripa is a co-production of Melojo Productions and PRX Productions with help from Goat Rodeo.

Our theme song is Follow Me from APM Music.

From Melojo, our team is Kelly Ripa, Mark Consuelos, Albert Bianchini, Jan Chalet, Devin Schneider, Michael Halpern, Jacob Small, Roz Therrien, Seth Gronquist, and Nick Ribula. From PRX Productions, our team is Cara Schillen, Genevieve Sponsler, Megan Nadolski, Edwin Ochoa, Rebecca Seidel. Additional sound design by Terrence Bernardo.

The executive producer of PRX Productions is Jocelyn Gonzalez. This show is powered by Stitcher. From PR.

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Everyone loves to share their skincare routine and the various products and serums they use and their exhaustive step-by-step process. But did you know that skincare can actually start in the laundry room? I'm partnering with our sponsor, All Free Clear Laundry Detergent, and tried it out.

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For me, it's the best way to start my skincare routine. I also love that it's perfect to use for everyone in your household, from babies to those loved ones with sensitive skin or allergies to dyes. I suffer from seasonal allergies, and All Free Clear removes 99% of everyday and seasonal allergens like dog and cat dander, dust mite matter, ragweed pollen, and grass tree pollen. All Free Clear is 100% free of dyes and perfumes.

Plus, all-free clear liquid is Safer Choice certified by the U.S. EPA. For a clean you can feel good about, all you need is all-free clear. All-free clear is not intended to treat or prevent allergies.