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Overnight, Duncan's Pumpkin Spice Coffee has sent folks into a cozy craze. I'm Lauren LaTulip reporting live from home in my hand-knit turtleneck that my Nana made me. Mmm, cinnamon-y.
The Home with Duncan is where you want to be. This podcast is supported by FX's English Teacher, a new comedy from executive producers of What We Do in the Shadows and Baskets. English Teacher follows Evan, a teacher in Austin, Texas, who learns if it's really possible to be your full self at your job, while often finding himself at the intersection of the personal, professional, and political aspects of working at a high school. FX's English Teacher, podcasting,
Premiere September 2nd on FX. Stream on Hulu.
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We are the Watchers.
Observers. Of the. Strange. Paranormal. Occult. Unwelcome. Spiritual. Horrifying. Mystical. Secret. Transcendent. Repulsive. Captivating. Unwelcome. Appalling. Gruesome. Unseen. Magic. Weird. Revolting. Intrusion. Horrifying. Unseen.
Welcome to the Mayfair Watchers Society. Hey!
that was one of my all-time favorites, Christmas Dinner by Home for the Holidays. You're listening to 96.6 Spirit FM, home of all your favorite Christmas hits. I'm your host, Mick Monroe, or Saint Mick, as they sometimes call me. Ho, ho, ho! All jokes aside, folks, I'd like to take a moment to thank all of you wonderful listeners for tuning in tonight.
I'm sure you're all snuggled up beside your fires, maybe sipping on a cup of hot cocoa, the presents under your Christmas tree. I'm grateful you've decided to spend your Christmas Eve with your dear friend, St. Mick. I'll be keeping you company for the next few hours or so, or at least until I hear Santa's reindeer clip-clop-clopping on the roof of our humble studio. Let's hope he has extra presents for all of Mayfair tonight.
We've got a couple commercials coming up, and after that, one of my favorite Sam Shore tunes, All for Christmas. Honestly, his voice just reminds me so much of the holidays. Waking up to a fresh blanket of snow, walking around town singing Christmas carols, a nice slice of pecan pie. I...
Color me surprised, folks. Wasn't expecting to get any callers this late on Christmas Eve. What a nice surprise, hearing from one of our listeners. This is Mick Monroe with 96.6 Spirit FM, here to play all your favorite holiday tunes. What's your name, caller? It's Newton.
Hey there, Newton. What can I do for you on this fine Christmas Eve? Um, I guess I'm not sure. My wife said I ought to really call. Didn't want to be a liar on Christmas Eve. Oh, this sounds juicy. Did someone steal all the eggnog at the Christmas office party? Ho, ho, ho! What? Uh, no. I'm calling because, well, I'm...
I'm calling from my daughter, Abigail. She's a big fan of St. Mick. Ah, always glad to hear from a listener. I'm guessing it's probably past Abigail's bedtime. Yeah, she went to bed a couple hours ago. So, what did she want to call about? Well, we have this tradition. Every Christmas Eve, after dinner, we go out for a walk, you know. Look at the neighbor's lights and all that.
Tonight, while we're out there, she turns to me and says, Daddy, look. It's one of Santa's elves up on the streetlight. Wow. A real elf on Christmas Eve? Did you happen to see it too, Newton? Um...
No, I didn't. Whatever she saw moved too fast for me. It was probably just an owl, a pigeon, or something like that, but she would not let it go, Mick. Even when we were tucking her in, she was asking all sorts of questions about if Santa's elf was going to come visit her, or if it was here making sure everything was safe for Santa. It's got me a little... I just think it's... It's funny, you know? Kids are funny.
They sure are, Newton. Her mom thinks that maybe that elf on the shelf stuff has really gotten to her head, but I'm pretty sure she's old enough to know that me and her mom move it every night while she's asleep. Don't say that! What if the kids are listening? You'll make my naughty list!
Yeah, seeing as it's almost midnight, I don't think so, but okay. Whatever. Regardless, I thought it was a bit odd, even for her. She loves Christmas time, you know. Every kid in Mayfair does. But she's not usually this imaginative. How old is your daughter?
She'll be eight in February. Valentine's Day, actually. Oh, that's so sweet. She's a Valentine's Day gift. I'm the host of our Valentine's Day programming every year. I'll be sure to dedicate a couple of songs to her this coming Valentine's, but that's not important right now. So you said you didn't see the elf?
I mean, I saw something, that's for sure. But by the time I figured out where she was pointing, it was already on the move. Never got a good look at it. Hmm. Say, Newton, I feel like you could use a little more Christmas magic. What do you say to taking us up on a little Christmas Eve field trip? A field trip? You want me to go find that thing, don't you? That thing? He's an elf, Newton!
And honestly, they would just about make my Christmas. Well, I guess. The presents are already under the tree and the wife's asleep, so I don't think anything else is going on. Why not? That's the spirit. It's a beautiful night out there. Let's see if we can't catch Santa Claus. Stay on the line, Newton. Folks, we're going to cut to a quick commercial break, and then we'll be right back to hear more about Abigail's mysterious Christmas elf.
Oh no, Martha! It's almost Christmas and I haven't done my Christmas shopping yet. Where am I going to find a unique, rustic, locally handmade gift for the special and unique person in my life this late? Oh, did you just move to Townople? I bet I know what that special and unique person in your life wants. To document the special sights and unique sounds around Mayfair.
Why, you should check out the new Creature Watching Journal from Journal Mamas, made from 1% recycled materials. I think you're right, Martha. With our sleek, unique, pocket-sized notebook, you and your loved ones can keep track of all your creature sightings, common and rare and unique, such as... The threatening, deadly, smiling owls. The elusive antler elk.
And who could forget Mayfair's very own Creekman? So don't you wait another minute. For just $19.99, that special and unique person in your life could be the proud owner of one of Journal Mama's official creature-watching journals. Visit journalmamas.com, that's journalmamas, M-A-M-A-S, dot com, for more information. Happy hunting!
Mayfair, it's our first Christmas together and your friends at Pan Continental Energy hope it's only the first of many. We want to take a moment out of our busy schedules to wish all of you a very happy and safe holiday season. Over the past few months, we've loved getting to know your unique town and we can't wait to see what the future has in store for all of us.
At Pan Continental, we understand the importance of treating the environment with respect and consideration. We understand that Mayfair citizens value sustainability above all else. That's why we're committed to making every Christmas better than the last. We care about each and every one of you.
Students and teachers, community members and community leaders, and of course, the fine folks keeping our town warm this holiday season. From our family to yours, we wish you a very bright and energetic Christmas. Ho, ho, ho! Welcome back, folks. Told you that would be a super quick break. Let's get back to our search for the Christmas elf. Newton, hopefully you've made a new friend over the break. Care to introduce us?
I'm not sure I'd call it my friend. Not with that attitude. Thanks for staying on the line. So, are you ready to meet him? Or her? Yeah, my daughter thinks it's a girl elf. Says her name is Jellybean. Aw, Jellybean. That's a perfect name for one of Santa's elves. Just as sweet as candy. Yeah, sure.
Just glad the missus went to bed early. Don't think she'd be too pleased with me walking around in the snow so late on Christmas Eve. Once you meet Jelly Bean, I promise she won't even question it. Oh, yeah. I certainly hope so, or I think I'll be spending Christmas in the doghouse. Are you seeing anything yet, Newton? Nope. Same old lamppost. Not a sign of any Santa's elves. Except... What?
Hear any sleigh bells? No sleigh bells, no. But this one light is going crazy. Keeps flickering. Pretty sure it wasn't doing that earlier. You know city lights. It's just a little weird. Almost like it's a pattern. You know how when a light starts going, it flickers pretty randomly? This one feels...
Almost rhythmic. Oh, yeah? You think Santa's sending us some Morse code? Uh, here. Hang on. Uh, da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da-da
Listeners? That's Jingle Bells! Can't imagine why Santa Claus would be playing Jingle Bells on a busted streetlight. Newton? Newton! Talk to me, buddy! I'm... I'm fine. Damn light exploded right above my head. I don't think I'm bleeding, but it's... it's a little cold. Uh... oh... whoa. What is it? You okay? Need me to call someone? No... no... I see her. You do?
Where is she? She's perched on top of the lamppost, just like my daughter said. She's all, you know, kind of looks like a person, but I don't think I've seen anything quite like it, even here in Mayfair. Wow. You don't suppose she was the one playing jingle bells, do you? Well, she was definitely the one that exploded the light, but now she's just staring at me. Well, what does she look like? Paint us a picture, Newt. She's crouched up there, but...
she's got her hands wrapped around the post and her knees go up past her head with legs that long i guess i can guess how she moves so fast none of that sounds very christmas elf like newt you think we're past the christmas elf theory mech i think i need to go back home i don't like how this thing is looking at me those eyes
I, uh... Jeez! What? Newt, you okay? She just jumped to another light. Now she's... Well, I think I'm in the clear now. She's all the way down the street. Thank God the Hendersons have their lights up. Otherwise, I wouldn't be able to see squat. Well, I'm thoroughly creeped out. Is it Christmas or Halloween? Did you know, back in the old days, it was a tradition to tell scary stories at Christmastime? I guess we're keeping that tradition alive tonight.
Yeah, well, I'm glad I could help you out. Listen, I know we didn't find any Christmas elves, but I hope you have a Merry Christmas, Mick. You too, Newton. Thanks for keeping us company tonight. Well, that was certainly something, wasn't it? But I think that's enough scary stories for tonight. If you're just joining, this is jolly old St. Mick wishing you and yours a very happy and safe holiday season. It's 12.05 on Christmas morning.
So I think it's about time for that Sam Shore track I promised you. Thank you for listening, neighbor. Mayfair Watchers Society is based on the works of Trevor Henderson, created by Trevor Henderson and Pacific S. Obadiah. Merry Little Christmas was written by Marissa Carton. Mick Monroe was played by Nate Dufort. Newton was played by Russ Moore. Journal Opal was played by Ashley Jones. Journal Martha was played by Nicole Goodnight. And the Pan-Continental Rep was played by Pacific S. Obadiah.
The dialogue editor is Chessie Hall. The sound designer is Brad Colebrook. Music was by Matt Royberger. The showrunner is Cale Brown. The creative director is Trevor Henderson. The producer is Pacific Asobadeye. And the executive producers are Tom Owen and Brad Miska.
