The Tea Has Been Spilt: My New Boyfriend and a Todd & Julie Appeal Update 44:56

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Good morning, good afternoon, whatever part of the day it is you're listening to Unlocked with Savannah.

Today's episode is a solo. It's been a long time since I've done a solo. And I think after the first of the year, we're going to switch up the podcast a little bit. And I want to get your viewpoints on it.

I'm thinking about, I don't know, I'm just going to go with haywire right now. Part of me wants to do every episode in pajamas with all of my podcast guests, have them show up in pajamas because let's face it, you have some of your most intimate conversations in your pajamas, maybe in your bed. I don't know, maybe we should invite every podcast guest into my bed. Erin, what do you think?

No, I think that's the look you're going for. No, I think that would kind of be like good little conversation. I don't know, but I'm just getting carried away guys. Okay. So I want just like a comfy, cozy feel, um,

Who knows? I could change my mind tomorrow, but that's fine too. But we are just, I felt like right now I'm in between filming episodes. So I just did an awesome episode and then I have another guest coming on in an hour or so. So

in between changing, I was like, let's do a solo. Let's touch base on life. Let's give all the updates because frankly, I feel like I really haven't given many on social media now. I recently posted about my parents' appeal and after what we filed it in July, so August, September, like five months and we finally got an answer. So

We have been granted oral arguments in our appeal. Our case is being held in the 11th Circuit, which is notoriously known for not really granting oral arguments. I want to say 6% of the cases that are submitted for oral arguments, only 6% get granted. So for that, I am so thankful and grateful. And for people who are maybe just tuning in for the first time, who stumbled upon the podcast, I am so happy you're here. And if you don't know our story, well...

Both my parents are currently sitting in federal prison due to alleged financial crimes and their sentences were outrageous. 12 and 7 years, I mean, absolutely insane. So winning this little step on the appeal is such a great feeling, such a great win. I don't want to get my hopes up too much though because I think right now

I'm just in a place of like, all right, this is good. But I still don't want to be let down. And I don't want to get my hopes up to then have to grieve the loss later. So I'm just hoping for the best, praying for the best. And that will be the week of March 25th. So mom and dad, hopefully, fingers crossed, can be home in April, May, sometime next summer. So for that,

I'm so grateful. Oh, oh my gosh. I don't even know where to start. Okay. So the appeal update. We also too are going to, I'm going to be filming a little series with one of my lawyers and it'll be a few episodes and it's just going to be on YouTube. So go follow our YouTube channel unlocked with Savannah.

These episodes will be just on YouTube and we're going to kind of take the case from the very beginning stages to where it's at now. Because a lot of people ask, well, how did you get here? What happened? Where did things go wrong? And a lot of people think they know what happened when reality, you just haven't been given the information and it's been hard to find it. So we want to break it down and give you a

Every piece of information so you can come to your own conclusions. So we're going to be doing that. That'll be coming out in the coming weeks. So stay tuned. But also, I think something else I want to touch on holidays. Holidays, they're here and full force. And they came a lot quicker than I would have liked.

And it's a tough thing to talk about. So therefore, I'm going to use my little security blanket of my PJs to help me talk about it. But Thanksgiving just happened. So when am I filming this? It is November 29th. So we just had Thanksgiving. And luckily, it kind of just felt like another day. It was tough. It was really tough because there were certain parts of the day, like as soon as I woke up,

I just knew like, all right, it's time to be in the kitchen with mom. It's time to she's cooking. Me and dad are sitting at the counter messing around, eating half the food before it's ready. So there were certain times of the day that were really, really hard. And I don't think people talk about holiday grief, which is a real thing. It's this year just looked so much different, so much different than last year.

Last year, I was sitting at my parents' table. I was helping mom cook. I was eating her food. Nick was there. All these different things. And I think this year was just a reminder of all the losses that we've had. Now, granted, both my parents are still alive, but it is a loss. It is a certain form of grief because things look different now. And it was tough. I started off the day. It was definitely a little quiet.

because I just it was different than what I was used to and then we so rewind Thanksgiving we weren't really sure what to do and I was never going to talk about my Thanksgiving day plans I was never going to do any of it um and then under certain circumstances

People obviously found out this was going to happen, but then that didn't happen. So now this is happening. It's just a whole backstory. And out of respect for multiple people involved, I'm not going to go into all the details. But obviously things look very different for my boyfriend and his kids this year and their Thanksgiving plans. Things look different for my Thanksgiving Day plans. I feel like both of our plans,

families that live within our households were just needed something different needed to kind of be reminded that it's just another day we didn't need to make a big fuss about it and so we had plans those fell those plans fell through and then one of the greatest people on earth uh just

She's been absolutely amazing to me and my family, Brittany Aldean and her husband, Jason. Jason has been just so great to Grayson and has checked in on him and has just been a good solid force. And Brittany has been just unwavering love and support from the very beginning, both of them. And I saw Brittany. This was two days before we were supposed to

leave for the trip that we had planned and then it got canceled and I went to a launch party for my friend Mallory Irvin who she launched a pair of pajamas and my sundaes which I'm wearing right now they're so comfy but at that launch party Brittany was there and she was like oh my

how are you? How's Robert? Like, I miss you. She loves Robert. And she was like, what are y'all doing for Thanksgiving? And so I kind of just went into the ups and downs of it all. And she, and so I told her, I was like, I don't know at this point. I was like, we're trying to figure it out, trying to come up with last minute plans. And,

And she goes, well, no. She was like, go to our house in Turks. Like, that's where you're going. And I was like, no, like it's, we're figuring something out. We've got a few options. And she goes, no, you're going. She was like, we, please go. And so she and her husband graciously opened up their home to us. And it just reminded me like what awesome people I have in my life and people that just

love on us and they see like tough times and it makes me emotional just talking about it because it has been tough not having mom and dad home and to see the people around me that have loved us and cared about us and it made me realize that

Family isn't just blood. It's not, you can have a family that you weren't born into. And for me, those are friends. Those are friends who show up like family should. And for that, I'm so grateful for. So this Thanksgiving, we all went, we spent time in Turks and on Thanksgiving day, we went out on a boat and we enjoyed everyone's company. We loved on kids. We, um,

loved on each other. We, it was just, it was as good as it could have possibly been under the circumstances. And I think what I love so much about that day and what meant so much was, um,

For me, from the beginning, I was like, I'm not going to fake this. I'm not going to sit here and throw on this huge Thanksgiving Day feast that just because it's what mom did, when in reality, it's just going to remind us of everything we didn't have. So it was time to create a new norm, do something new. And frankly, I'm sorry. I'm like a good baker. I'm a pretty decent cook. But for me to try and make a turkey, I don't.

God bless it. God bless it. Because I just, you got to pull stuff out of it. You got it. Nope, not happening. Not happening. Not doing that. So maybe next year, but this year just didn't have it in me. So we just had the best time, but there was a text. I think, I think I'm just so grateful for people in my life allowing me to just show up as I am and deal with

My emotions just as they come. And it was Thanksgiving morning and Robert had like sent me a text. It was really sweet. And then I responded and said, sorry if I'm a little quiet, just missing mom extra today normally would be cooking away with her right about now.

it was just in that moment that it made me realize this was 828 in the morning but he noticed like I was off he noticed I was quiet so he sent me a text and was like hey I just just know like I see you and people are gonna be like oh why did he send you a text when you were together well okay when you're together and you have kids that you're like trying to shield and protect and we are not

When you have five kids amongst the two of you, we're very much respectful of their emotions and their feelings. And he and I are friends, really. Like we were not. I don't believe in being all over each other and showing kids those things. And kids have enough going on as it is. So we're just human beings who love each other and treat each other well.

But right now is just not the time for that. And also, I've been very quiet. People say, oh, no, you haven't been quiet about things. That first podcast I did, I aired it all out. And there are things I regret saying for sure. But...

I haven't started speaking about things until it's coming from another source or people on social media, Instagram, TikTok, YouTube, whatever it may be. And I want my truth to be heard. I am struggling right now because I feel like I'm getting the brunt end of a lot of different, coming from a lot of different directions. And regardless of people's opinions and beliefs, I

I know in my heart of hearts that I never want to hurt someone. I never want to be the source of someone else's pain. I want to do the right thing. And sometimes I slip up. Sometimes, yeah, I've said things that are the source of people's pain. I have caused hurt. I have hurt feelings, whatever it may be. And I look at it and I want to take ownership for it. I want to take accountability for it. But...

I am, and this is the only time I'm going to say it, but I am not the cause of Robert's divorce. That was going on long before I was ever involved.

And also when it comes to kids being involved, I, for Chloe and Grayson, I am not their mom. I am not their dad. I am their sister. And I'm lucky enough to get to be able to be a parental figure for them right now and get to love on them and learn from them. And I get to learn all the amazing things that kids teach you, just how to be

love harder, how to have more grace and be forgiving. And I get to be the one that gets to learn all those things. So I get to be their sister and I get to love on them. I don't replace their mom and dad. And it also goes the same for Robert and our relationship. And he has kids. I am not their mother. They have a mother. I respect them.

I respect she is their mother. And but that doesn't mean like I will show up however they need me to show up.

And this is a learning curve for me, especially dating someone with kids. And now I technically have kids as well. It's such a learning curve. And when you both have your kids full time, you have to learn how to have a relationship with kids. They are 24-7. And there's definitely been a lot of...

I don't know. There hasn't been a ton of negativity, but there's been people that are like, oh, you need to focus. You both need to focus on your kids. You need to do this. You need to do that. Well, we both for right now have our kids full time. Like we both have them full time. And so we have to in order for us.

Not even our relationship, because we have made it very abundantly clear, like our kids will be our first priorities. But in order to show up for your kids, this is something I'm personally learning. So for me, in order for me to show up for Chloe and Grayson, the best way that I can show up for them, I also have to be full. I have to be fulfilled.

can't be running on empty. I have to have some adult interaction and love and relationship. And it's okay for me to get away a weekend out of the month, a weekend, like a Saturday and Sunday with just me and my boyfriend and vice versa. Like it's okay. And I just ask people to maybe see it from that perspective of when you are a single parent household, you're

It's okay to do for yourself. And why do you want your kids to see you neglecting yourself? Because I feel like in turn, that's showing them or teaching them to neglect their self for others. So that's just something I'm working through and I'm trying to figure out how to navigate it. There've been tons of questions around it. And obviously my life is in the public eye. So that's something, and I'm just tired, honestly. I'm,

tired of being painted as the bad guy it's just it's something emotionally that's been really hard for me to handle when in reality I know I'm showing up every single day and the best way that I can possibly show up and when it comes to my relationship at the end of the day and luckily I've been blessed with such an amazing human being to where we have tough conversations and we we

finally one day I was just like hey like I shouldn't have to suffer for I shouldn't have to suffer for you and your ex's inability to be adults and get divorced and do it the right way like I and that's just how I felt and luckily he heard me when I said that it was like you're right like and and

I'm so thankful for that. And like I said, he has three young boys and they're freaking amazing kids. Like they are awesome. And they have a mom. I'm not their mom. I will show up for them in any way they need me to show up for them. Like I know my place.

And I just want to make that very clear because I've had people come at me about that. But it's just some, those are just things I had to get off my heart because I

I feel like I'm probably not the only one that's going through something like this. I'm not the only one struggling with things like this. And I'm learning as I go. Being a single parent household is tough. You're never going to get it right all the time. But also my life is under like a microscope and the public eye. And I've tried to keep that part as private as possible. But whenever I see people creating a narrative, that's not true.

It's so hard for me to not defend myself because I know who I am. I know what I stand for. I'm just unapologetically myself. And I know that I show up when it's tough. I try to be a good person. And I fall short, but it doesn't mean that

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I don't know about you guys, but I've been trying to figure out what would be a great Christmas gift for people and why not give the gift of better help? Because let's face it, sometimes we all need a little help. We need help figuring out our emotions, dealing with certain situations, and just kind of getting regulated. That's where better help comes into play. So let's

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At the end of the day, Robert has three amazing kids, like the three sweetest, most loving, hilarious boys. And they have a mom. She is their mother. I am here to show up in their lives as whatever they need me to show up as. I'm learning right now firsthand that

Showing up for Chloe and Grayson. I'm not their mom. I'm not their dad. But I can show up as a positive role model. I can show up as a positive influence. I can show up and show love and kindness and grace and all these different emotions. And I will never be the person to sit here and speak poorly about

about their mother.

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anyone else in their life because that's not me. Now, very early on when I revealed our relationship, because I know people are going to be like, oh, but you said this. 110% said something in the heat of moment just about me dating someone and whatever. It was insensitive. I think it was for me to just like, it was

I hide in humor. That's also another thing for me. When I get uncomfortable or I get nervous, I resort to humor sometimes. And I have to be better at that because there's a place in time for humor and there's a place in time not for humor. And so, but I will never be one to sit and say anything negative because at the end of the day, that doesn't do anyone any good. I

Obviously, we'll say I stand by my significant other and I will never waver from that. Like it's where I stand. I just want to live my life and be as positive of a role model as I can possibly be. And so that's kind of where I stand today with that is like I have kids. He has kids and he has been such a great role model for my Chloe and Grayson. Like they

am over the moon when it comes to that because they need that. And so for that, I'm grateful. And it's a learning curve right now. It's a learning curve. And if you guys are going through something similar, just know you're not alone. Being a single parent household, having to do it all financially, physically, all these different things.

It's tough and it's okay to fall short sometimes. It's okay to question your decisions. It's okay to not be okay. It's okay to not be perfect. So give yourself a little bit of grace because trust me, I know I need it. You need it. And yeah,

It's tough. It's life. Humaning is hard. Okay. Humaning is hard. I just made up a word, I think, but it's hard. So just know that. And so let's see what we touched on. We touched on the appeal. We touched on relationship, Thanksgiving. I think I pondered off of the Thanksgiving topic to talk about the relationship because of how amazing he was during the holidays and

Thanksgiving was tough. Luckily we were in another country. So I don't feel like the whole Thanksgiving thing was much of a, they really didn't celebrate in Turks. So for that, it was like another day and I think it was refreshing for all of us. So for that, I'm grateful sitting here today. Don't know what my Christmas plans are. I'm not lying to you guys. I swear. Um, don't know what my Christmas plans are. We're kind of just playing it by ear. Um,

I'm definitely going to spend time with my grandparents. And I think we're just going to put more emphasis on quality time with each other because it all looks different this year. So we're going to show up as we are, feel how we are, and it's okay to have holiday grief. I think the best way, what helped me with my...

holiday grief was there was a video I posted on Instagram and it was just photos and videos of all the people who have shown up in my life and sitting there and having a moment of gratitude and thankfulness

And during a time of sadness is what helped me trying to find the silver lining, trying to find the thing that made me happy in the midst of my sadness was something that really helped me. So whether it's talking about your loved ones or doing something your loved ones did or

Eating a food, drinking a drink, whatever it may be that can bring you a little bit of happiness. Maybe look at those sad things and say, instead of allowing this to make me sad, today I'm going to do these things in memory of the people that aren't here because when we did them, we were so happy. And I think that's what I'm going to try to do this Christmas is remember

Maybe lean into the things I did with my parents instead of staring away from them. Because while we were doing them, we were happy. So I'm no therapist or anything, but I feel like maybe that can help some of you that are going through that grief right now during the holiday season. My biggest day-to-day challenge is right now. So I didn't, I mean, I've been struggling. There's no question about that.

But it's been hard for me to pinpoint like how I feel or what I'm struggling with. And then we just recorded a podcast with Liz Moody that will come out after this podcast, I believe. But her book that she came out with, one of the tips in it, it's like 100 ways to better your life. 100 ways. Yeah. 100 ways to change your life is her book. And one of the tips were about creating content.

Like these small wins, like celebrating this, create small like expectations for yourself or small wins. And I'm always shooting for the stars. Like, hey, I have to get up here. And then that just leaves me to feel like I accomplished nothing. It leaves me to feel like I'm not good enough. I didn't do this good enough. I didn't basically everything I've done has gone to waste. And it made me realize in my life, like maybe that's why I'm so just like,

focused on the end goal is because I never celebrate the small wins. And that's a tough thing for me to do. And so I think I have to get more organized in my life and be like, hey, I need to create goals for myself for the week. And I need to celebrate when I accomplish those goals. Whether that's going to the gym three days a week or working

setting aside time for myself to either read something in a book, a devotional, write down my thoughts and feelings. I feel like I do need to do that. I feel like I need to write down my thoughts and feelings because I communicate better when I write, especially when I'm in relationships. I always do better with writing letters. It just helps me to articulate how I feel and

much clearer than when I speak. May sound weird, but just how my brain works. So right now, I think that's my biggest struggle. It's just feeling like I'm never getting to where I want to get to, but it's because I never celebrate the small wins. So I need to start doing that for myself. And recently I found myself falling back into really a really bad habit of mine that I had swore I had like sworn off. And

That is for some reason I have allowed the things that people are saying about me to really affect me. And I don't know why. I think maybe because right now there is a big attack on my character and who I am as a person.

When I know that I'm really, I strive every day to try to be the best person that I can be. So maybe I'm, that's why it hurts so bad, but I've just been reading everything. I've been reading everything that people say about me and I,

that's really tough. I don't know if part of me is reading it because I'm so used to the trauma of it that I'm like, well, I, this is just what it is. And too, sometimes I feel like when you go through so much trauma in life, it's kind of like, whoa, what am I without the trauma when you really look at it? And I think because I've, I have done a lot of self work and

But that is something that maybe I struggle with is like, what am I without trauma? What am I and how do I overcome that? But also, too, I would be I wouldn't be human if I sat here and said that people's words didn't bother me because they do. And I don't know. That's a tough one. That's so that's something I've really been struggling with and trying to navigate how I deal with that.

Another thing too is here at the holidays, I mean, going to visit mom and dad. That has been really tough because especially going and visiting mom and dad and being in a relationship and feeling like I want something for myself at times. And so we've gone and seen them almost every weekend. But this past month, I mean, it's been three weeks since we've seen them. And that's because of COVID.

Just my, me and the kids travel and holidays and school and work. And I have this layer of guilt that weighs over me of, oh my gosh, you have to go and see them. Like how selfish of you. I, I'm the, it's like angel on one side, devil on the other of just this constant battle of feeling like what I'm doing isn't enough. If I'm making one person happy, I'm disappointing another person.

And trying to figure out how to go about it the best way. And luckily, both my parents understand. They want the kids to be happy and to not be visiting a prison 24-7. But I think that's just my own internal battle that I'm dealing with. And also, it's tough going to visit. That's something that is really tough. Because when I go and visit...

At first, visiting was awesome. It was great because I just got to see them. I got to hug them. I got to love on them. And don't get me wrong when I say this. I still love going and visiting and seeing my parents. But the longer they're there, the harder it is. At Leidos, a brilliant mind is smart, but a brilliant team is smarter.

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To visit because I know that I'm leaving them there. And...

That's the tough part. That's like the really, really tough part. And especially now, over Thanksgiving, I found myself, I literally had just a full on just sob moment by myself for a few minutes, because there was something that had happened. And all I wanted was to call my mom. All I wanted was to call my mom, talk to her and

Get her advice. That's what you want to do when you're in a relationship. You just want mom's advice. And especially because I look at my life now and I'm like, when my mom met my dad, my dad had two kids and

And in a way, I'm like weirdly reliving her life because obviously my boyfriend has kids. And there's things that happen that I just want my mom's advice on. I just want to hear how she would deal with it or what she went through and talk and vent and relate and get advice and learn how to show up better. And...

I just started crying. So I was like, I just want to call mom right now. And I couldn't call her. I don't get to call her. I just have to answer when she calls me. And the longer they're there in prison, I'm reminded of what I don't have. And I think right now, that's the tough part. And you're also reminded of how slow our system is. And how you just have to sit and wait. Your life is in someone else's hands. And...

For the very, for up until recently, I would say I was like the happy-go-lucky. I was, all right, this is going to happen. This is, this is the process. Let's do this. Let's do that. Let's fix this. Let's fix that. And I can't fix it. I cannot fix it. It is out of my control. And now I'm past the happy-go-lucky stage. And now maybe sitting in the feelings I should have sat in at the beginning, I'm

Because I automatically went into fix it mode. And so maybe I feel like I'm reverse feeling than my siblings. Because at the beginning, everyone was so down and out and depressed and all these things. I'm like, guys, freaking snap out of it, you know. And now I feel like I'm more in that phase right now. And I kind of want to learn from this experience. Yeah.

And maybe when things happen from here on out, sit in it and allow myself to sit in it and feel it and not force myself to snap out of it. Because now I'm just in like a sad phase. I don't know. I'm trying to make it make sense when I say it. But it's just kind of where I'm at right now. So the holidays were tough, especially in being in a new relationship is tough because, you

There's things I just want to talk to my mom about. Like when you're in a relationship, it's like, hey, mom, how would you do this? How would you do that? Oh my gosh, they did this today. It pissed me off. Or whatever it may be. Like I just want my parents here to talk to them about it. So...

That's that's kind of where I'm at with that. So it's tough. It's sad, but also I'm finding the little wins in it. OK, I have so many awesome kids around that are going to cause me to have gray hair before I ever should.

great relationship, a great partner, great friends. I have friends who show up as family. I have great people in my life who show up for me and that's my win. So I'm finding the positive in it. And this holiday season, I just encourage you to do the same. It's tough. It's really tough. But embrace the hurt and the pain and the sadness. Allow yourself to feel it while also

allowing yourself to see the wins and to smile and laugh and not feel guilty about it. Because that's kind of my challenge to myself this holiday season is find the little wins. And I

That's kind of just where we're at. So the appeal stuff, like I said, you'll see a whole breakdown of the legal case on YouTube in the coming weeks. So go ahead and subscribe to the Unlocked with Savannah YouTube channel so you don't miss it because it will be the most informative video you've watched when it comes to our family's legal issues. And just give yourself grace. That's all I can say. Give yourself grace. Let yourself feel it. Heck,

I don't know how I'm going to feel 10 minutes from now. So cheers to you. Go get a coffee. Go have some wine. Just don't podcast while you do it. Highly advise against doing that. And two, if you notice, I keep like pulling my pajamas down. That's because Sean...

who is behind the camera and he's great. And he's probably tired of my voice by now. But when we sat here, I was like, should I put my socks on or no? I was like, I think it looks better without socks. And it's going to end on a good laugh for you guys. So I was like, all right, I think Aaron said it looks better without socks. And Sean, when you get to know him, he's a man of few words, very little words. But when he says them,

They count. Like they really count. They make you laugh. And it's either like really sweet or really funny. So he never, I've never heard a negative thing come out of his mouth. But anyways, back to my feet. He said, Aaron was like, yeah, it looks better without your feet or without your, oh my gosh, talk today, Savannah. Aaron said, it looks better without your socks. And Sean, what'd you say, Sean?

He was like, don't give it away for free. Because guys, Feet Finder, oh my gosh. The amount of photos of my feet on Feet Finder are wild. And I have five-star ratings, if I must say. So I have learned I'm not giving away my feet for free. I may start an OnlyFan for my feet. Oh, is it OnlyFans, right? Yeah, not OnlyFan. OnlyFans. So...

away for free. So please do not snap a pic. These could be worth a lot of money. I've got five stars. But on that note, happy whatever day you're listening to this on, hopefully Tuesday, and give yourself grace this holiday season. Feel what you feel. Sometimes life just sucks and embrace it. But until next time, happy, not so happy holidays.

Social media is exhausting. I mean, I love it. The memes, the drama, the tea.

So I started a podcast to digest all that is going on and give you an opportunity to just sit back and soak it all in. The Perez Hilton Podcast. We talk trending topics, cultural reset, and in case you missed it. So if this sounds like your world, your cup of tea, give my podcast a listen. The Perez Hilton Podcast, available wherever you get your podcasts.

Leidos Radio. L-I-D-O-0-0-0-3-0-0-0. What's making smarter, smarter? 15 seconds. At Leidos, a brilliant mind is smart, but a brilliant team is smarter. That's why we collaborate to create even smarter technology solutions in national security and health. Leidos. Making smart, smarter.

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